To Me, Who Doesn’t Love You

“Already? Where are you going to put it?”If the baby were about to be born, it might be understandable, but taking out such large furniture now would mean it would collect dust for nearly ten months before it could even be used. When Suhan hit the mark, Yeonseo, who hadn’t considered that far, looked flustered.“Uh, I thought we could put it in the master bedroom?”“So, you’re just going to leave it unused, collecting dust until we bring the baby home ten months from now?”Faced with a specific point, Yeonseo pondered for a moment before responding.“Then I’ll buy a new cover. We can just cover it, so it’s fine….”Since he was so intent on leaving it there, Suhan didn’t feel the need to interfere. He shrugged, laughing heartily as if to say, “Do whatever you want.”“One more thing in the master bedroom isn’t going to be a big deal….”Looking at the stuffed animals filling the crib, acting as cushions to provide a sense of comfort for the baby under a cover with a beach vibe, Suhan couldn’t deny that it was cute. Waiting for the day they would eventually use it didn’t seem like a bad idea.As soon as Suhan gave his vague approval, Yeonseo eagerly took it to the master bedroom. It was comical. Even though there was a lever on the floor to unlock the wheels and roll it, he was lifting it, either out of concern for the floor or because he didn’t want to wear out the new wheels.“Do they make a lot of these kinds of things nowadays? How do people find them?”Looking at the crib now in the master bedroom, Suhan asked, and Yeonseo casually replied.“A coworker saw it on a social media post shared by an acquaintance. It’s an overseas product, and they thought it looked great after seeing a foreign influencer use it, but the price was a bit high, so they just ordered a domestic version….”He then hurriedly clamped his mouth shut, suddenly worried that he might appear wasteful. This was because Suhan flinched, as if he’d been hit on the head.“Oh… it’s not that expensive. Besides, we’re not buying multiple items, just this one time, so I thought it’d be okay….”As Yeonseo mumbled defensively without realizing it, Suhan was focused on something else entirely.“Wait, where did they see it?”“On social media….”What was it? Was he upset because it wasn’t a luxury or department store item, but something bought from an interior brand flaunted on social media? Yeonseo couldn’t figure out exactly what had startled Suhan, so he cautiously gauged his reaction. After a moment of holding his breath and staying silent, Suhan mumbled to himself as if something had clicked.“Right, if it’s social media, just in case….”Without even glancing at the nervous Yeonseo, who looked like a mouse trapped in a corner, Suhan immediately grabbed his phone.“Suhan hyung…?”Yeonseo, confused, called out to Suhan, but he didn’t seem to hear him, his gaze glued to the phone screen. After manipulating the screen for a while, he suddenly clenched his fist and out of nowhere pulled Yeonseo into a tight embrace.“Ah… what a relief. Ah… thank you so much. I’ve been stuck on this for so long, and now it’s finally clear.”Expecting to be scolded, Yeonseo was bewildered by the unexpected hug. His face flushed red with embarrassment, but Suhan didn’t seem to notice.“What?”Yeonseo asked, startled, but Suhan didn’t offer further explanation. Instead, he patted Yeonseo’s bottom with a proud smile and then, looking much more at ease, walked into the living room, phone in hand. Left in the master bedroom with only a flushed face, Yeonseo stared at the door Suhan had walked through, feeling as if he’d been enchanted. He raised his hand to his forehead; he was so flustered his forehead was burning.Meanwhile, Suhan, now in the living room, let out a deep sigh of relief, having finally regained the lead he’d lost. Why hadn’t he thought of this earlier? Like most job postings, which seemed to require a neat appearance from the start, both men and women working as servers or hosts at the establishment boasted eye-catching looks. The uniforms were quite sharp too. Gathering all these good-looking people, there was no way none of them would want to show off their own attractive appearance.Quickly searching through well-known job listing platforms and popular social media sites, Suhan easily found the accounts of people still working at Chef Im’s establishment.Since the workplace and names were public, there was no controversial content, but among the trivial comments and chats, a familiar name appeared.“This is it.”The account, which seemed to slightly alter the owner’s name, didn’t reveal their workplace, but a photo from about a month ago, taken on a vacation, was posted with a brief caption.[Resigned]— Oh no, you finally left ㅠㅠ. You did great. Rest up and recharge. └ Haha, I hung on for as long as I could, but then the right opportunity came.└ Message me when you’re back. Let’s grab a drink together.Seeing a recent post, Suhan almost sent a direct message, but just before hitting send, he hesitated. Thinking from the other person’s perspective, what would they think if they received a sudden message on an account they hadn’t disclosed themselves? It would seem more terrifying than anything, like being stalked. He slammed on the brakes, realizing that.“Well, I’ve found the account, at least….”It would be much less creepy to first contact a colleague who had disclosed their workplace and ask if they had any other contact information.“Don’t get ahead of yourself, please….”Suhan quickly turned off his phone and opened his laptop, steadily working through the plan he’d mapped out in his head.Less than 30 minutes later, Suhan received a reply from the colleague he had contacted first. Fortunately, the person had been there that day and agreed to pass along the message. As they exchanged short messages, Yeonseo, who had emerged from the master bedroom, seemed to sense Suhan’s impatience and cautiously approached him.“Should we return what we got today?”“Huh?”Suddenly, what was this? Suhan, doubting his ears, looked at Yeonseo, who drooped like a puppy that knew it was about to be scolded. Yeonseo seemed to think that Suhan’s unsettled expression was somehow his fault. That tiny trigger was all it took for Suhan to feel the tension he’d been building like a wall suddenly collapse.“Haha, no, it’s nothing like that. I was just thinking about something related to the library. There’s been some tension among the volunteers because their schedules got mixed up, so it’s been on my mind.”Suhan casually threw out an excuse, then pulled his young husband into a tight hug. How could he resist when Yeonseo was this adorable? He wasn’t Suhan’s son or younger brother, but he was just too cute. He pinched Yeonseo’s soft, tender cheeks, teasing him. Yeonseo, looking annoyed as if to say, “Don’t treat me like a kid,” tried to squirm away, but Suhan was quicker, holding him before he could escape.“Well, that’s a relief, but….”“Why are you running away? Didn’t you come to cheer me up because you thought I was mad?”When Suhan pulled him closer with a playful grin, Yeonseo turned his head, muttering quietly.“…You are treating me like a kid.”What’s wrong with that? Better to indulge him while he can. Suhan almost playfully patted Yeonseo’s bottom again but held back. He didn’t want to push him too far and actually hurt his feelings. Instead, he cupped Yeonseo’s cheeks like one would with a child or a pet, gave him a firm kiss on both, and laughed it off.“Let’s finish cleaning up those boxes and go to bed. You have work tomorrow, and I’m feeling a bit sleepy, so it’s better if we get some rest.”“I’ll do it. You go ahead and lie down first.”As they bickered lightly over who would clean up, the boxes scattered around from unpacking were quickly tidied up. After they finished a bit of cleaning in the living room, the two of them finally lay down side by side in bed. Just then, Suhan’s phone screen lit up.‘Hmm…’He had just laid down to sleep. Still, Suhan knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep soundly without checking the message. He glanced over at Yeonseo, who was lying next to him. It seemed Yeonseo had dozed off not long ago, lips firmly closed as he slept soundly. The tension that had creased his brow just before he fell asleep had softened, giving him a more peaceful expression.‘I’ll just take a quick look at what it says.’But despite his initial resolve, Suhan ended up getting out of bed.[Hello. Sorry for messaging so late. I’m contacting you after hearing from Hyeun. Please check when you’re available.]It was nearly midnight, so he could just ignore it and reply in the morning, explaining he’d been asleep. But Suhan didn’t have the luxury to wait. Who knew when or where the consequences of his past actions might come back to haunt him? In the end, Suhan quietly slipped out of the bedroom and sent a reply. Less than a minute later, he got a response.If they hadn’t replied, Suhan would’ve taken it as an excuse to go back to bed. But no, he needed something from them, so it was only right to be available. Letting out a soft sigh, Suhan tapped on the screen, continuing the conversation.Meanwhile, after Suhan left and the faint sounds of movement disappeared, Yeonseo stirred awake. He noticed the empty spot next to him and quickly sat up. He reached out to touch the spot where Suhan had been lying, feeling the lingering warmth. Maybe he just went to the bathroom, or perhaps he was thirsty.Yeonseo lay back down quietly, pulling the blanket over himself again, but the fact that Suhan hadn’t returned after a while began to unsettle him.“……”Ever since Suhan revealed he was pregnant, Yeonseo had been happy, yet sudden waves of anxiety continued to grip him. Suhan had said worrying like this was pointless, but that was easy for him to say—it was his situation, after all. Suhan’s older brother had always hated him. Even if it wasn’t an issue now, in a few years, he still wouldn’t like him. The only reason they got married was for business, and Yeonseo couldn’t help but wonder if the real Suhan could ever accept their relationship.Wouldn’t Suhan think he had taken advantage of a moment when he wasn’t in a stable state, emotionally or physically, to get close to him? The fear that Suhan might one day believe he had manipulated him during a vulnerable time was one Yeonseo couldn’t completely shake.Though Suhan wasn’t good at lying, and Yeonseo trusted him wholeheartedly, there was something Suhan was clearly hiding these days. His confident demeanor and steady posture made it hard to approach him about it. Watching Suhan busy with things Yeonseo didn’t understand wasn’t a pleasant experience.‘Do you not trust me? Am I that untrustworthy?’Yeonseo imagined Suhan would ask that if he knew. But Yeonseo had his reasons. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Suhan now; it was that he had spent too long in love with the cold, ruthless “Suhan hyung” who once despised him. Yeonseo didn’t want that version of Suhan to return, but he also didn’t want to lose the happiness they had now, and that made everything harder. Every day, the same unresolved worries washed over him like waves, ebbing and flowing.Click.Who knew how much time had passed? By the time Suhan returned to the bedroom, the spot where he had been lying had already cooled. Yeonseo, pretending to still be asleep, shifted under the covers as Suhan lightly waved his hand above Yeonseo’s forehead before pulling the blanket up and settling in. Nights full of thoughts always felt unbearably long, as if morning would never come.The next morning, Yeonseo got up, leaving Suhan still asleep, and began getting ready for work. As he searched through the drawers in the dressing room, he found something he hadn’t taken out in a long time. It was an item he rarely touched, worried about scratching it, but now it gleamed in his palm. Suhan would probably ask what had gotten into him if he saw it, but between spouses, it wasn’t anything strange. With a light sigh, Yeonseo could hear the birds outside signaling the arrival of the morning.* * *“Ugh…”By the time Suhan woke up, it was almost noon. Surprised, he fumbled for his phone on the nightstand, checking the time. He shot up in bed, shocked. How could he have slept this late? Sure, being pregnant and staying up late on his phone had worn him out, but sleeping in this much was ridiculous. The shock quickly faded, but the bad dream he vaguely remembered left him feeling unsettled.‘See, this is why even if you don’t live like an angel, you shouldn’t go around making enemies everywhere.’It had taken a lot of effort to track down the contact information, but it had paid off. Now, Suhan needed to figure out the best way to use this. As he scrolled through the messages he exchanged with an employee the night before, he grabbed his laptop and sat at his desk.As expected, Juno had indeed funded Chef Im’s restaurant remodel. Otherwise, there would’ve been no reason for them to dine there in private and spend so much time in the back meeting room. The payment had been made through a bank transfer, which meant no embezzlement or tax evasion, but it was still enough to lose trust within the company.However, without clear evidence of what Juno gained in return for funding the remodel, it remained just a suspicion. If Juno used a proxy account, tracking it through account records wouldn’t be enough. Suhan closed his eyes and thought for a moment before suddenly remembering something.But then again, unless there were photos of him kissing Chef Im or lying in bed together, it was just as difficult for them to accuse him of having an affair. If they had such evidence, they would’ve already sent it to his phone. Instead, they only sent a grainy, unidentifiable photo from years ago. Without solid evidence, this would be a battle of suspicion, and Suhan wasn’t at a disadvantage.Although incomplete, Suhan now held a card that could stand against Juno. After some thought, he picked up his phone again and placed his fist on the desk, raising his middle finger.Click.With a short shutter sound, the screen was filled with the image of his raised middle finger. Let’s see if they had anything left to throw at him. Yeonseo would probably freak out if he knew what Suhan was doing, but this time, Suhan was betting on his old self. No matter how tough things got, he was certain he hadn’t been involved with such a repulsive person in an inappropriate way.That evening, however, Suhan was met with an unexpected situation as he prepared a little surprise for an unwelcome visitor who was about to arrive.“What’s that on your hand?”Suhan’s attention was caught by the white gold wedding ring on Yeonseo’s ring finger as he wandered around the kitchen, preparing dinner like any other evening. The ring had no intricate craftsmanship or flashy decorations. It was simple but undoubtedly expensive, with modestly placed stones that, despite their subtlety, indicated the quality of the gemstone. Suhan, who hadn’t been concerned about the ring since waking up in the hospital, found his eyes widening at the sight of something that must have existed all along but had never crossed his mind until now.“Oh… our wedding ring. I came across it this morning while organizing the tie pins….”Yeonseo carefully removed the ring and placed it on the dining table as he washed the ingredients in the sink. Then, he asked cautiously,“If it bothers you, should I take it off?”Take it off? Suhan quickly shook his head.“No, that’s not why I asked. I was just surprised. Of course, we wouldn’t have had the ceremony without them, but I’ve never seen it before, you know?”Whoever picked it out seemed to have a generous budget but didn’t want to look flashy. The ring’s elegant yet luxurious design seemed like it would suit Suhan more. As he held the ring Yeonseo had placed on the table and stared at it for a moment, a significant question suddenly struck him. Where’s mine? Whether because there was no need to wear it, or because he disliked the idea of marriage and couldn’t stand the sight of the ring, Suhan’s hands had been bare in all the pre-accident footage.‘It could have been because I needed my hands free for demonstrations….’Suhan glanced at Yeonseo, who, though not acting much differently from usual, somehow looked more shadowed. His fingers lightly tapped the table as he pondered.“It’s a relief that it doesn’t make you uncomfortable….”What would be uncomfortable about it? The only dilemma Suhan was facing was whether or not to ask about the whereabouts of his own ring. But that wasn’t really his fault, right? Brushing off his brief hesitation, Suhan asked,“There’s nothing uncomfortable about it. I was just surprised because I hadn’t thought about where my own ring is until now.”He had hoped Yeonseo might know, but unfortunately, Yeonseo didn’t seem to have any idea either.“I know you sold the house and got rid of most of your belongings before the wedding. If it’s not in your office or some other place you’ve kept things, it might still be in your room.”However, Suhan had already searched through every drawer in the small room multiple times. There had been no sign of a case that could contain something as valuable as a ring. Suhan tried to recall his past self, Lee Suhan, and thought it entirely possible that he might have stashed it somewhere out of sight simply because he couldn’t stand the sight of it, regardless of its value.“Then I’ll look for it. Maybe I didn’t wear it before because I worked with water or had demonstrations to do, but I don’t need to worry about that now.”It wasn’t that Suhan was suddenly placing great significance on a piece of metal the size of a coin, but wedding rings were meant to come in pairs, after all. There was no reason not to wear it, and letting something go to waste didn’t suit his tastes. So, he casually spoke his mind.“…Do as you like.”Is the upcoming presentation that stressful? Suhan couldn’t help but feel concerned for Yeonseo, who gave the same vague answers as always. However, he didn’t realize that Yeonseo’s unease wasn’t just from the pressures of work, but also from a looming fear that there might not be much time left to wear the ring openly.Before Suhan lost his memory, the two had lived in the same house, but their relationship had been worse than that of neighbors in a small studio apartment. At that time, the ring was not only unworn, but its mere existence seemed like a taboo.Later, after finishing a simple meal, Suhan went into the small room and rummaged through the drawers and desk for quite some time. Surely, he hadn’t thrown it away? There’s no way he tossed something that valuable into the Han River or a trash bin, no matter how much he hated the marriage. Suhan searched the room until beads of sweat formed on his forehead, when suddenly, he spotted a small pouch tucked into the corner of a drawer. It didn’t look like something meant to store valuable jewelry.“Could it be in here?”It might contain something like his university graduation badge or some inexpensive cufflinks, but a wedding ring? Without much hope, Suhan opened the pouch, and out from a bundle of what seemed like extra watch straps fell the ring.“…”It was here all along? As they say, “expect the unexpected.” Finding the ring in such an unlikely place, Suhan quickly slid it onto the ring finger of his left hand. He had worried that his body, having lost weight during the coma and regained it since, might not fit the ring anymore. But to his relief, it fit perfectly, not too tight or too loose. The silver-white metal gleaming between his neatly tapered fingers seemed to suit Suhan quite well, though it felt a bit strange to him.“I found the ring. It was safely tucked away in the drawer.”There was no need to mention that it had been tangled up with extra watch straps. As Suhan walked back to the living room, Yeonseo had just finished cleaning up the kitchen and was untying his apron. The sight of him, not shy but with a slight blush as he removed the apron, almost made Suhan’s thoughts stray into something mischievous. Clearing his throat, he glanced at the ring Yeonseo had left on the table, gleaming brightly.“Give me your hand.”Without thinking, Yeonseo reflexively extended his hand like a well-trained puppy, and Suhan slid the ring over Yeonseo’s pale finger, pressing it snugly into place.“It looks good. The pale skin makes it stand out nicely.”Suhan wasn’t sure why the most expensive white diamond hadn’t been chosen for the center, but instead, a blue diamond had been placed there.At Suhan’s casual compliment, Yeonseo’s cheeks flushed red.“Why are you getting shy over something like this? Anyone watching might think you just got proposed to.”At Suhan’s teasing words, Yeonseo didn’t respond and turned his head away. He wanted to pull his left hand from Suhan’s grasp and run away, but there was nowhere to escape. While Yeonseo was preparing himself to let go, Suhan always seemed determined to break through Yeonseo’s careful defenses. That thoughtless gesture made Yeonseo’s heart ache.“…That’s enough now, please let go.”Unfortunately, the more Yeonseo pulled back, the more Suhan tended to push forward. He had only meant to return the ring, but seeing Yeonseo retreat, blushing and clearly flustered, reignited a spark in Suhan.“What if I don’t want to?”“…What?”Suhan gently rubbed Yeonseo’s hand, marveling at how soft the skin was—so much so that it didn’t seem like the hand of a man nearing thirty.“Should we take new wedding photos before Bada is born? And then, once Bada is here, we can take another set with the three of us. Your belly won’t show much, so there won’t be a big difference, but the more pictures we take, the better, right? It’s different having visible memories than letting them fade in your mind.”At Suhan’s sudden suggestion, Yeonseo unknowingly gripped Suhan’s hand tighter. Smiling, Suhan urged him for a response.“Hmm? If we want to book a good studio, we should make a reservation in advance. I’ve heard that popular places are booked out months ahead, like getting tickets for a big event.”Though Yeonseo didn’t know much about it, he nodded with a resigned smile, knowing Suhan was somewhat teasing him. See? Isn’t it so much better when you smile with that pretty face instead of looking all gloomy and staring at the ground? Suhan swallowed the words he couldn’t say aloud and gave Yeonseo’s hand another firm squeeze.* * *The next day, the provocative photos in the mailbox were gone, as if the sender had reacted to being noticed. There was nothing left behind. Suhan couldn’t shake the feeling that something worse might be brewing, and Yeonseo’s presentation day was inching closer.“Is it only two days away now…?”Yeonseo was representing the food and beverage division at this seminar. He would be the one managing the presentation materials and holding the microphone on stage. Hopefully, nothing dramatic would happen on the day of the presentation, but there was no way to be sure, and Suhan couldn’t relax. The event was scheduled to start tomorrow, with each division taking its turn on different days, and the food and beverage division was set for two days later.I should visit the villa this week, no matter what. The recent threats had kept Suhan tied up and distracted, and he felt guilty for not giving it more attention. Before informing Yeonseo of his plan, Suhan called Yeonseo’s mother to check if anyone had visited the villa recently.“Oh, Suhan! It’s so nice that you call often now. There’s nothing wrong, is there?”Her voice was lively, with the background noise of a social gathering suggesting she was out with friends.“Thanks for calling, but I’m just stepping out for a moment. Would it be okay if I call you back later? I have some good news to share, and I was hoping to meet up and treat you both to some food, but I feel like it’ll turn into a long conversation.”Though it wasn’t the best time for a lengthy chat, it seemed enough for Suhan to ask about the villa.“Ah, it’s nothing urgent. I just wanted to check if it’d be okay for Yeonseo and me to visit the villa this weekend. You can text me later when you’re free, and I’ll call you back.”However, her unexpected response left Suhan feeling as if he’d been hit over the head.“Oh, the villa’s fine to use this weekend, but it might not be cleaned. Next week, renovations are starting, so I told the caretaker they didn’t need to work there after last week.”“What?”Renovations? Hadn’t they been gradually fixing it up all along? Why the sudden overhaul? Questions raced through Suhan’s mind, but Yeonseo’s mother laughed as she explained.“Oh, Juno probably didn’t tell you. My husband’s family has moved back to Korea, and they said they’d like to stay at the villa from time to time. So, they offered to remodel it for us. The building’s a bit old, right? We figured we might as well give it a full renovation and make it look like new.”A sudden thought struck Suhan—maybe the purpose of the threats hadn’t been simply to intimidate.