Surgery Godfather

The title ‘Liao, the President’ wasn’t a boast. Its social interpretation was entirely different.

In the hospital setup, the term “President” was the most distressing indicator for someone who worked around the clock, the entire year. It represented the commitment of being on call all the time.

Younger and tired-looking doctors with heavy eye bags were always the medical presidents – he was effortless to spot.

On seeing President Liao, the standardized trainees rushed to fetch a chair for him. Some were familiar with him from past rotations in the Urological Surgery department, as these presidents were their top bosses during their tenure.

Yang greeted him with a smile and a nod since he could not recall his name or the formal way to address him.

Little Five identified President Liao, “Bed 22, Wang Changxin, in the suite at the end of the corridor. The patient desires a penis extension surgery. He wished for you to evaluate and consult.”

“I’ll go and have a look!”

President Liao adjusted his glasses. He was particularly interested in these types of surgeries. His seniors had once told him that they attracted a lot of attention in the field. And they were nothing compared to other procedures, such as urinary stone flushing.

This surgery, when done by an experienced surgeon, takes only about a dozen minutes to complete. With a small incision and one or two stitches – no medication required, one could quickly operate over a dozen procedures in a day.

He was apprenticing under the chief and had been practicing for a while. Being more than familiar with the procedure now, he seemed quite interested in this consultation. Little Five accompanied him, and so did a few trainees.

Yang Ping had to meet with Director Han in his office. After knocking, he found the office empty and went ahead to send a WeChat message to Director Han, suggesting they set a time for discussing the consultation at the City People’s Hospital. It was better to have face-to-face communication on the matter.

Earlier as mentioned, he had asked the Director for some time off to get the consultation handled, given the special circumstances. But now, after deliberation, he decided to consult Director Han again, considering whether he could get half a day to get the job done.

It seemed like Director Han was in a meeting. The hospital was always bustling with various meetings like medical insurance cost control, patient complaints, medical disputes, and whatnot – all these issues were brain-draining.

For many front-line doctors, half their time was devoted to these issues, and the rest half was dedicated to saving patients’ lives. There was a rumor that some trouble had erupted recently in the Trauma Orthopedics Department.

A granny with a comminuted fracture of her right forearm had arrived with personnel from an elderly care home at the ER. Trauma Orthopedics was consulted, and its resident – President Guo – visited the ER with a trainee to see her. The elderly patient had severe swelling in her forearm, so much so that a jade bangle on her forearm was stuck in her swollen skin. Her hand had turned pale due to ischemia.

On seeing this, Guo instantly realized the severity – the bangle had to be promptly removed. Upon a closer look, it was evidently impossible to take it off. The only way out was to break it. Just then, a man was brought to the ER with multiple stab wounds from a drunken brawl. Guo was urgently led to him, with the doctors and nurses who were looking after the elderly patient also following him.

Just before he left, he instructed the trainee to cater to the granny before he rushed off to treat the man. This young trainee, full of enthusiasm and dexterity, understood his mentor’s intentions. As an eager one, he took the initiative to get things done – for it was just a bangle.

So he opened the contents of the ER’s drawer and found a hammer. With a swift mind, he cushioned a side of the bangle on a desk, “Missis, I’m afraid I have to break this bangle. Otherwise, your hand might need amputation.”

The granny was understanding, “This is an old bangle I bought for fifty cents during a visit to the Great Wall with my husband back in the ’80s. It doesn’t bear any monetary value. Go ahead and smash it.”

Even a pricey one wouldn’t be of much help; it was simply not possible to remove it!

Upon hearing this, the trainee doctor felt relieved. The hammer struck, not too light, not too heavy, the bracelet shattered and freedom returned to her arm. It seemed more relaxed now that the swelling had significantly decreased, and slowly her hand regained its color.

Well, what a sharp little chap! After breaking apart the bracelet, he waited for his teacher to come and correct the position of the fracture and apply a plaster cast.

Yet, the old lady’s family, responding to the call from the nursing home, had all arrived. Two sons and a daughter, they were all present.

They came with wrath and fire, scolding the staff of the nursing home. Then seeing the broken bracelet on the table, their faces became even darker.

What a predicament, the family members claimed it to be a family treasure worth at least hundreds of thousands. “You just f**king smashed it!” They pointed and jabbed indignant fingers almost hitting the training doctor

The honest old lady wanted to explain that the bracelet was worthless, a cheap market stall find. But before she could finish, her daughter dragged her away, stating that she was becoming senile. They decided to abandon the treatment and the cast, dragging the old lady home, pain showing on her face, her tears nearly falling out.

Both sons stayed back demanding an explanation from the hospital for destroying their family jewel. They threatened to call the police, taking pictures to document the accident. “This family heirloom was ruined by your doctor’s hammer and there should be compensation.We won’t leave it at that.”

President Guo arrived, breaking into a cold sweat. He had seen so much blood today from numerous patients without ever sweating, but now the sight of the broken bracelet made him perspire.

He had overlooked something, failed to explain clearly, and now here was the trouble.

As of now, in the emergency department, every fully conscious patient or patients with family present would have to sign a consent form just to cut their clothes. How dare he break a bracelet that might cost fifty cents? This thing now could be worth whatever they claimed.

A real mess, what a mess indeed!

No sooner when Director Tan was hectically busy with his work, he was called to a meeting in the afternoon. Concerned, Director Han decided to take a look at the situation as well.

The relatives insisted that the bracelet was a family heirloom. While they hadn’t signed any agreement, the old lady had agreed. But their claims were unreliable as they stated that the old woman was muddled and had no recollection or understanding of what transpired during the ordeal.

The nursing home staff was asked to testify, but they claimed not to have heard anything at the time as it was rather noisy, and they did not know what had happened.

What to do, it was a difficult situation? What to do was still not clear.

In less than 15 minutes, President Liao had returned. Yang Ping poured him a cup of water and asked, “How is it? Is surgery necessary?”

Liao took the cup of water given by Yang Ping, looking surprised: “Teacher Yang, I will do it myself! The patient wants to increase both the length and the girth of his ‘thing.’ The more, the better. He wants to improve the overall measurements. This is a plastic surgery procedure. The patient’s wish is an indication for surgery. I’ve informed him about the risks, and he has agreed. We will conduct a pre-operative examination and, if there are no contraindications, the surgery can be performed. We will take over the case and hand it back after the operation.”

President Liao opened his laptop and pulled up the consultation form: “I will write my opinions on the consultation form. Teacher Yang, I heard you are preparing for an Academic Conference. Do you plan to compete with Tokyo University’s affiliated hospital?”

President Liao gave a thumbs up: “Being able to compete with them is something we all admire. The orthopedics department deserves to be the leading department in our hospital. If it were us, not to mention competing, they may not even agree to attend our conference.”

After clattering away on the keyboard, the consultation form was complete. President Liao got out his phone: “Teacher Yang, may I add you on WeChat?”

“Sure, but don’t call me ‘Teacher.’ Just call me Doctor Yang.” Yang Ping was not accustomed to being called ‘Teacher.’

They added each other on WeChat. This fellow’s WeChat nickname was “Bound by the Lower Half.”

There were articles online saying that doctor’s names on WeChat are very interesting. There isn’t a name they couldn’t think of, only those you couldn’t imagine.

What names do urologists use? For example, “Urine & Sex”, “Gunsmith”, “Retain the Root,” “Drainage Worker”; proctologists are even cooler, with names like “Chrysanthemum & Knife,” “Baby Daisy,” “Super Mario,” “Eyes without Pearls”. Cardiothoracic surgeons had “Open Heart Knife,” while neurosurgeons had “Water-cutting Head” and radiologists had poetic names like “Seeing Through You.”

President Liao, the urologist, left, and Yang Ping waited in the doctor’s office for Director Han. Little Five and his group were probably still discussing the surgery with Hermes.

Sisi’s mum came in. She had a bill in her hand, looking flustered, searching for Little Five, who wasn’t there. Seeing Yang Ping, she said, “Doctor Yang, I just paid Sisi’s hospital fee, and there is an extra ninety thousand yuan.”

“It must be Jiang Jiahui who paid it?” Yang Ping told her to calm down.

“I called Jiahui, and it wasn’t her who paid.” Sisi’s mother showed the receipt to Yang Ping. Indeed, it had been paid today.

During this period, Sisi’s hospital fees were mostly paid by Jiahui, with Sisi’s parents also paying several thousand from time to time. Nobody else was known to have contributed.

If either Song Zimo or Tang Fei had contributed, they would have informed Yang Ping ahead of time. Who could just drop ninety thousand in? An anonymous well-wisher? A mistaken transfer?

The possibility of a mistaken transfer was slim. Typically, you’d take the bill to the hospital to pay, which includes the patient’s name, department, and hospitalisation number. But an anonymous well-wisher wasn’t impossible.

“Don’t worry for now, let me look into it,” Yang Ping comforted her and asked her to go back and take care of Sisi.

With Yang Ping’s assurance, Sisi’s mom felt more at ease.

An unexpected ninety thousand yuan in the hospital account for no reason wasn’t a small sum.