Shepherding Humanity

Spore Evolution’s Third Open Beta’s update log was as follows:

1. Thirty Beta Tester’s slot will be opened up, and up to 180 people can be online at a time.

2. Players are welcome to send an email to the developers to apply for a Beta Tester’s slot.

Same as before, the application will be a "Biology Paper", expressing how players plan to evolve in game, what species they will evolve, why it’s feasible, and what makes their species viable.

This test will determine whether you can enter the Third Open beta.

3. Due to technical limitations, there will be no further open slots in the near future.

In order to allow more players to enter the game, this game follows the policy of “survival of the fittest”, and the last 20 players out of 150 from the previous Beta Tests will be weeded out. Their accounts are:

"Little Pig who Loves Life",

"Eight Hundred Miles Headshot"

"Gonna Beat You Up"

…..

In this third beta test, 20 people will be replaced and 30 people will be added, making it 50 new accounts in all.

4. It’s up to the players to explore the game world and figure out its background setting. This is for the sake of enhancing the players’ enjoyment of this game, and the developers will have the final say.

…..

Most major game developers talk too much when releasing a new update.

But Xu Zhi was different.

He was lazy, so the update log was very brief, and each point had this extremely “hardcore” undertone: IDGAF about how you feel. Scram if you don’t like how I do things!

Xu Zhi's goal was very clear:

He wanted the players to all go bald!

He wanted to squeeze them for all they were worth and make them rack their brains to write papers and come up with new theories for him. Let them brainstorm until they go bald to help him (“DIY”) evolve new species!

The balding Akina’s Speedster was a perfect example!

Work hard! You’ll become strong after going bald! (Translator's Note: This is probably a reference to Onepunch Man)

"Since I’ve taken care of the Third Open Beta and posted the update log, I should go out and buy some food."

Xu Zhi got on his bicycle and left the house.

Chen Xi has said that after she left, he could still go to Aunt Li's house to have his meals, but Xu Zhi didn’t want to be a leech.

He’ll have to cook his own food from now on.

In the sandbox world, he was a ruthless slavedriver of a Creator, but in the real world, he was a nice guy who had to worry about his reputation.

"I feel as if I've become one of those keyboard warriors: I act all crazy online, but am kind as ever in reality."

Xu Zhi calmly ridiculed himself while stroking his thick hair, but he had no regrets.

After all, life was all about having fun; and although he had terminal cancer, there was now hope of a cure.

Xu Zhi leisurely rode his bicycle through the country roads while enjoying the fresh air and the rural scenery. He went to the town to buy a lot of vegetables, meat, sausages, cooked food, and fruits. Then he rode back and put them in the refrigerator.

"These should be enough for a few days. After all, I still have my delicious Pallbearer Chickens…"

Xu Zhi had thought of a certain someone again. "Also, like I previously proposed, a large number of players have begun to evolve plants in the orchard. But even though they're plants, they're still running around all over the place."

There were too many wacky players in the small evolutionary sandbox. After being a stationary tree for a while, they quickly got bored of the monotony and evolved their roots to let them freely run around as they pleased.

They did not find this weird at all and were very proud of themselves: It’s morphin’ time!

Look at this tree running around. Isn’t it awesome?

For an example, at this moment when Xu Zhi has just returned to the courtyard:

"Whoa! Run away, guys! Stay away from the Path of the Stampede, the Giant Boss is back!"

"The Traffic Committee of the Sandbox’s Third District would like to remind you: There are thousands of dangerous roads, and the Path of the Stampede is number one among them! If you fail to stay away from it, your loved ones will cry!"

"Stop babbling, run!"

A bunch of weirdly shaped plants that had previously been standing still started to pull their roots out from the soil.

Tap, tap, tap!

Dragging mud behind them, they frantically ran away; their running posture was extremely odd.

In an instant, the Path of the Stampede has been turned into a barren dirt road without a single plant in sight.

Xu Zhi was stunned. He carried his stuff through the ten-meter-long path, and entered the house. "These bastards are becoming more shameless by the day."

As soon as Xu Zhi had walked into the house, a bunch of miniature plants began to poke out their heads and look around cautiously in the yard. After they had confirmed that the coast was clear, they hurriedly returned to the Path of the Stampede, then rooted themselves in place, and returned to being ordinary plants.

"Stop pushing, you just stepped on me!"

"Your roots are getting entangled with mine, are you messing with me?"

"Dude, that’s where I was standing before, you’ve stolen my spot!"

"F*ck! Are you playing dead? You think you’re really a plant? My spot has the best lighting! Look at my growth! My luxurious green leaves! You think I’m gonna let you take it? Let’s duel!"

….

A short while after Xu Zhi left, the entire place had turned back into a lush forest, and there was no trace left of the previous pathway.

Somewhere in the lush forest, two trees had started their duel, and were happily wrestling.

"Dude, pull on his leaves!"

"Right, turn him into a baldy!"

"How dare he steal your spot!"

Poof!

The fruit of one of the trees exploded, spraying the other tree's wooden face with corrosive liquid that soon covered its entire body.

"F*ck! How dare you poison me! Where’s your sportsmanship!?"

"Esports does not need to be fair!"

"This dude really knows how to play dirty. He’s even evolved poisonous fruit bombs! No wonder he dared to steal someone else's spot! This is natural selection. If your plant is too weak to get a good spot, then you are destined to be eliminated!"

Around them, a bunch of trees were shooting the breeze and happily cheering them on.

Aside from the spectators, there were also others who were excitedly talking.

"Damn, this update has really caused a stir! The medical students outside are all complaining, and asking why it’s not a medical paper this time around! Their papers were all ready to go!"

"So what? The moment the Beta Test started, everyone outside has gone crazy. They’re all excitedly preparing their biology theses now! I’m beginning to think that this game is trying to turn us netizens all into masochists; the more it abuses us, the happier we are."

"It turns out that our yard’s giant boss is really an invincible NPC. He is the legendary Creator, a background character who adds color to the sandbox’s setting."

"To think we wanted to defeat him!"

"Yea, that was stupid."

"Hehehe, Akina’s Speedster must be panicking. He wanted to shit in the Creator's food, and hide poison in the shit!"

"Ignorant people are truly fearless."

…..

Xu Zhi had just returned to his room and placed the black and white supermarket plastic bags on the table. He started putting the groceries into the refrigerator while feeling quite happy and relaxed. After all, he was used to the wacky antics of those tiny players outside.

Naturally, they hadn’t seen his plastic bags.

All they could see was a hazy glowing giant, and any modern object he carried would be concealed by the Hive Mind.

He frowned slightly, "They actually know that I am the Creator?"

Xu Zhi thought for a moment, then went to his computer and boarded the forum.

He did this whenever he was confused by an unexpected incident; these boastful little guys couldn’t keep a secret if their life depended on it.

Xu Zhi did a quick search and immediately found out what had happened.

Everything started with this incredibly “imaginative” post:

"Amazing! If we take what we have learned of the Magic World’s background setting from Future Skywhale, and connect it to our sandbox world’s own background setting, we arrive at an amazing truth! Our sandbox world is but one among thousands in Spore Evolution!"