NOVEL NEXT Chapter 9: The Baratie
Dear cosmic entity,
Why did you send me to this world? Every day I feel a sense of confusion I thought unparalleled the day prior. When I thought this would be the last of my surprises, I'm in fact just besieged by even more ridiculous happenings.
Eating in sleep? Check.
Nearly lopping my head off, calling it practice? Check.
Contracting food poisoning because none of these people know how to cook? Check.
A guy throwing his fist at a giant, real-life version of the loch ness monster whilst screaming about rockets? Check
Unwanted interlopers in my hammock? Check. That one I'd have less objection to if it were the navigator. But I digress.
It was much to my surprise when a floating paradise sat in the shimmering waters, like an oasis to my dehydrated visage. The crew unanimously decided to make a quick stop at the restaurant 'Baratie'. Obviously, I had no complaints. A few other small vessels were already stationed at the miniature floating dock that accompanied the restaurant.
I say restaurant lightly, it was more like a floating fortress. The central building had multiple floors and could seat many, large bold letters depicting the name were emblazoned on the port side, where we were about to dock. It looked immovable but judging by the sails and masts, this could in fact sail. It was not a glorified buoy. The most striking of the vessel's characteristics was the fish-like appearance. What would be the bow of a normal ship was shaped like a fish head with a fin at the opposite end.
Multiple levels… Dormitories, kitchens, seating, controls for the ship, storage. Did they take passengers from island to island, or was it just visiting vessels that ate here? Assuming the Baratie travels along the sea. Even if they coincide with the most traveled sea routes between islands, the sea is vast enough to limit the number of customers. Then there was notifying long-standing customers where the restaurant was located at different times of year. Restocking supplies that can't be retrieved from the sea. It was a nice idea; I couldn't help but think it wouldn't be as profitable as a simple mainland restaurant. Which immediately made me think of the other possibilities… Those worries were mostly unfounded, considering the navigator and swordsman had heard of this restaurant before. Meaning they had reputation enough not to be an obvious trap… I still had my guard up, however.
"Ahh, can finally eat some real food. Luffy, you aren't ever cooking again! My mouth has been ruined…" Not even attempting to stifle a groan the redhead said whilst walking up the dock approaching the sturdy doors to the promised land.
"Meat!" Before she could even attempt to open the door the captain practically barreled right through it, sprawling directly onto the floor as onlookers looked perplexed.
"ENEMY ATTACK! Prepare the war spork!" A large man looking like a mix between the iconic cartoon sailor known for his love of spinach and a silverback gorilla roared at us.
"Shut up, Patty. It's just a customer." Smoke was directly blown into the face of the angry ape by a tall, limber man in a suit. He had blonde hair and slim features, his face mostly blocked by the constant fumes emitted from the cigarette almost eternally huffing in his mouth. If I had to guess, he was probably around the same age as the rest of our group. The blonde that is, not the silverback gorilla. I wasn't sure how to ascertain the age of one of those.
"Sanji, you little shit. Looking to die?" The large man accosted him, holding a rather large spoon and fork combo. So, they did have a war spork… I guess tridents are a weapon, this makes sense… I guess.
"Bring it if you can, shitty cook." Despite the obvious difference in build and age, the younger man had absolutely no problem standing up to him. Spending time here, I realized that strength wasn't obvious from appearance, that was the same in previous world as well. But I felt that that obfuscation became much more dangerous here.
"Both of you shut it." An elderly man with blonde, slowly graying hair smacked them both on the head with his peg leg. His moustache was styled into plaits that extended further than the edges of his face, with a rather stern expression he turned once again to the suited up blonde. "Sanji, take their order. Back to work as well, Patty."
Both men quickly moved back to their stations. The mutterings of the blonde still clear to my ears. "Pain in the ass old man…" He gave a serviceable scowl as he looked at our entourage. "Whadda' you wan-?" His eyes quickly lit up and widened by nearly 3x, I could've sworn there were hearts in them.
The reason? Isn't it obvious? He was looking at me.
Even in my head, it doesn't quite sound like him. I guess the resident narcissist's brand of boasting wasn't something I could imitate.
He was in fact looking right past me, the only possible member of our crew that could elicit that response. The swordsman.
Yeah, no. Just kidding again… I have been incredibly bored during this journey.
Regardless, his demeanor shifted almost immediately in response. No longer was the vulgar, lazy and downright rude employee. Now he was a paragon of virtue, incredibly polite and brimming with despera- I mean charm. Charm in spades. "A table for two, beautiful. I could offer you my company mademoiselle, I get off shift right about… Oh, will you look at the time, this second." He gestured to look at a watch on his wrist, despite nothing actually being there.
"Hey, hey! We'd like to order too y'know." If there was a fourth wall to break, rest assured his nose would've already penetrated straight through it. The server paid no attention to the rest of us after she entered his sight.
"Yea sure, whatever. Go sit like over there or whatever, doesn't matter." He said whilst waving the rest of us men away like a bad smell. How the hell does this place stay afloat? I meant that both physically and fiscally.
"May I ask the madame's name?" A red rose appeared in his mouth as he continued his attempts to woo the redhead.
"Nami. Could we have table for five?" An awkward smile tugging at her lips. Her hands rose slightly as if to create a barrier to prevent further movement into her personal space.
"Of course, Nami-chan. This way." We were led to a corner of the establishment with a large table draped in white cloth surrounded by a cushioned bench attached to the wall. It looked rather comfortable. I was reminded more of the typical family diner or perhaps a karaoke bar. Rather than stealing glances it would be more accurate to say that the waiter was heavily leering at the woman. Before long everyone had taken their respective seats, the captain and his first mate on the corner. Followed by the navigator and the marksman fanning out to one edge whilst I occupied the other edge, a bit of distance between the group and myself.
He threw a handful of menus in the center of the table before tenderly handing one to the navigator. "May I take your order?"
"Oooh! I'll take the-" Excitedly the marksman spoke up from behind one of the comically large menus.
"Wasn't talking to you." For the second time long-nose was interrupted before he could even get a word in. I only hoped the same wouldn't happen with the swordsman or we'd quickly find ourselves on a battlefield I wanted no part in.
"MEAT! MEAT! I WANT MEAT!" Meanwhile the captain was salivating without even taking a glance at a menu. Quantity was always his concern, so long as quality was above a certain standard I'm sure I could convince him to eat most things. If he didn't just eat them himself… At this point I'm honestly convinced that he distinguishes objects as edible and inedible foremost, anything else was an afterthought. Which is saying a lot because I'm not actually sure thoughts arrive in his head for there to being anything after.
"Then serve it yourself." Without even looking the server replied with a puff of his cigarette. This wasn't going anywhere. I gave Nami a look to hurry her decision. We wouldn't be getting our orders until she decided, clearly.
"Could I have the Linguine allo scoglio, please?" She asked after a brief scan of the items.
"Of course we have the finest, freshest seafood available. A wonderful choice, as expected of a refined lady. And what would you like to drink? Personally, I recommend a lovely Sauvignon Blanc for its rich taste, it pairs very well with shrimp this time of year." He was rambling. The spirit of a professional occasionally reared its head, when he wasn't needlessly flirting.
"A-Ah, yeah that's fine." Overwhelmed, she went with his suggestion.
Before the waiter could sprint off to the kitchen without taking our orders as well, I cleared my throat. To which he obviously ignored, but the redhead understood.
"Could you see to my crewmates as well, please?" She asked with a smile, not quite reaching her eyes. It must be suffocating to be treated as the intermediary between us.
"Of course, Madam anything you need. What can I do for you all?" The question was cordial to a much greater degree than before. Probably because he was being asked by a woman, a particularly beautiful one at that.
The three males of the group repeated their orders for the server. The captain's gluttony evident, the swordsman's alcoholism running at full throttle. The marksman's normal request felt flat in contrast.
"You?" That was the first time he had addressed me, mirth apparent in his eyes. I was something he did not like to see. Did I smell bad? Did I look weird? I bathed just the other day; I shouldn't smell or look strange. I had Japanese features but that seemed to be somewhat common from looking around the restaurant. He doesn't like me, not sure why. Not wanting to bother with complicated requests or looking at a menu I quite literally had no clue about, I opted for the easiest choice.
"I'll have the same as Nami." In response he looked at me like filth and muttered under his breath. Gripping the notepad in hand slightly harder as he jotted down the choices and slowly walked back to the kitchen. Should I be worried?
An hour or two passed and I must admit the experience was rather nice. Surprisingly, my food wasn't tampered in any way. I guess he had that professional courtesy to not contaminate the food despite disliking us. Although, I can't exactly understand his thoughts.
I was brought back to the same inane thought process as the three idiots back in that place. All day they would talk about girls, yet if someone had interacted with them like actual humans do then it was a grave offense to them. In which case I felt a bit annoyed to have scorn held at me simply for the fact I was a man and had the companionship of a woman. A woman which I'm quite clearly not even romantically involved with at this time. Nor is this even romantic in any sense of the word, there are three other men at the table as well. This childish behavior continued whenever the server intermittently came to check on the table.
It's a bit late to be thinking of this now that we've all eaten. But… do we even have the money to pay for this? Surely, they aren't expecting me to pick up the tab, I've been washed up on a nearly deserted island for a month for crying out loud.
I'd like to think that the crew had enough sense to not come unless they had the money, but then I remember who their captain is… Dine and dash? Or maybe the navigator will pay?
Nah… No way, that's happening. I'd sooner discover interdimensional travel before she parts with money. That being said… Maybe we are in luck?
That topic was pervading my mind when the older chef, likely the boss, arrived at our table. The same stoic face as earlier asked rather harshly. "200,000 berries, pay up." Is that a lot? I can only assume it when looking at their faces. In unison they all looked at their captain. Why would you shine such expectant gazes at him?
"Ah, gotcha." To my surprise he reached into the pocket of his vest. Only to bring out an IOU and drop it into the man's outstretched hand.
"I hope for your sake this is a joke. Boy?" The rest of the crew summarily held their head in their hands, cursing themselves for thinking differently.
"I'll be king of the pirates soon. Just give me a few years and I'll pay you back!" He said with a volume and cheer that lit the entire place up. Charisma only takes you so far, I guess.
Fairly obvious what happened next. The older gentleman had quite generously hit him over the head dozens of times with his pegged leg. Subsequently throwing an apron at him and telling him he can pay it off with his body.
The world's oldest profession…
What?
Dishwasher.
What did you think I was about to say?
At this point I'm hoping the cosmic entity that sent me here will eventually get tired of these dull jokes and do something. At least tell me why I'm here, not like I'm against it. For one it's convenient, but very confusing. I didn't like being an unknown piece in someone else's games. It felt like I had just changed hands, as if I was transported to another board with different rulers. I hadn't escaped my fate; I was simply brought into another troublesome one. That was why I wasn't particularly thankful to be here right now, I wouldn't think of this as an escape or fortunate event. It's more than likely that I'll be roped into more troublesome things than before.
Relenting, the captain followed the orders and disappeared into the kitchen. For the next 15 minutes intermittently the distinct sound of something shattering could be heard behind the doors. We're never leaving, are we?
[Piracy!]
The doors to the Baratie burst open suddenly. An older man wearing a beanie walked into the establishment, his face haggard. Cheeks sunken, face gaunt. He was struggling to stand and walk through the outstretched doors. His eyes strained, as if closing them would mean the end. Ravenously he approached the closest table, attempting to eat the food on the table presented. Only to be brutally accosted by the silverback gorilla from earlier. Men and women seated nearby sprung up from their seats and gained some distance.
"Hey! Get outta' here! Don't go causing trouble for customers ya' hear?!" He shouted whilst waving the large comically dubbed 'war spork'.
Broken mumbles escaped from the man. "Please… a little… food." His hoarse voice was met with the disgruntled expression of the employee. Who took no difficulty to grab the man by the scruff of his collar and throw him through the doors once again.
"OI! Patty! The hell are you doing?!" The blonde server from earlier arrived, showing some actual concern. No need to be alarmed, he's a guy just like us.
"He was bothering the customers! Plus, I've seen that guy before, I'm sure of it…"
As they discussed a hand crept through the entryway as the man gradually crawled himself further into the restaurant once again. Muffled pleas escaped behind the tears welling in his eyes. "Please, just a little… do whatever you want to me after… I just need… food…"
The large sailor grabbed the man by the scruff of his neck looking directly into his eye. "Man-demon Gin! Man-demon Gin of the Don Krieg pirates! Is your captain around? You hear me you son of a bitch?!" He asked whilst shaking the man, spraying his face with spittle.
"They're all starving… please… just a little…" His bloodshot eyes looked straight into his. Pleading.
"Hah! As if. Someone, notify the navy! We've got Gin and his crew nearby!" He shouted at the kitchen, the blonde server slinked back into the kitchen walking with more purpose than before. I guess he disliked the interruption, we should probably leave before the navy gets here…
A few minutes passed and the smoke machine returned. With a platter of food in hand. What? Where was this compassion when I wanted food? I may not have been starving but I still needed it!
"Eat up." He gingerly placed the plate in front of the man, sitting on the floor alongside him.
"Sanji, do you have any idea who this is? Who gave you permission to give out stock?!" He asked, indignantly waving the 'war spork' around.
"What are we Patty?"
"What are you talking about? Don't put 'we' in that sentence! Nothing in common between us."
"Cooks. We are cooks."
"I wouldn't give you that much credit…" The man muttered.
Still smoking, looking off into the distance through the open doors. Barely registering anything around him. Two men with weapons brandished entered.
"Man-demon Gin. We've come to take you in! Prepare yourself!" A slim man wearing a blue jacket and sunglasses shouted from the open doors.
"Twin hunters, Johnny and Yosaku on the case!" The other of the two men wore a green jacket and plaid shorts, along with a strange red headpiece. They crossed their swords walking closer step by step. The waiter looked at the two of them, finally paying attention to his surroundings.
"I don't care what your business with him is. Wait until he finishes eating." His tone was nowhere near propositional. This was happening.
"Who the hell are you? This is a wanted man! 12,000,000 berries, we've been tracking him for days now." The first man asked, pushing up his sunglasses. He grabbed a few posters from his jacket pocket and displayed them from the entrance. Nami seized up at the sight, her arm subconsciously scratching her left shoulder. Tearing at it would be more accurate.
"I just made him a meal. Food will not be wasted. Sit and wait." Still lazily sat whilst watching over the starving man. All the while the decaying man stared at the food in disbelief, tears that were welling, now shedding.
"You've got to be joking me… We're taking him. Now." The two bounty hunters shifted their weapons slightly, changing the aim of their attack. At the prospect of danger nearby customers began to move further and further way from the conflict, creating a crowd a few meters away. Where the large man from earlier stood at the head.
"…What a shitty day…" Another plume of smoke emerged from the mouth of the server before he stood. Right in the pathway of the two intruders.
"Yosaku, take left."
"Yeah, Johnny. Let's do it." The men approached from either side planning to pincer the server. Are none of the other staff going to help? Even Popeye over there looks completely unbothered.
The men charged at the server from both directions simultaneously, sending a slash at him from different directions. In return the man shifted his weight, dodging around the blades before balancing onto his hands as he spun his legs around flinging both men towards the doors once again. Papers erupting from the insides of their pockets as wanted names covered the floor, the gentle breeze from the door nudging them inside, closer and closer. The twin bounty hunters, or whatever they were called, looked to be having difficulty getting up as they shifted weight onto their elbows looking at the server.
"Yosaku! C'mon, let's go again!"
"Gotcha!"
Another kick came both their way as he effortlessly dodged their blades. This was… It's a bit hard to watch. They were outclassed. The swordsman watched with a visible struggle; I agree. Their swordsmanship was shoddy at best, they also screamed out their attacks before it made contact. Which I didn't understand, though the entire crew did that as well. Before long the swordsman jumped from his seat and approached the ongoing fiasco.
"Another one? I just can't get a break today, can I?" The server said with a sigh.
"I hate to interrupt in another person's bounty, but I can't have you beat them up too much." Both men's eyes lit up as they looked at the green-haired savior.
"Aniki!" Both men shouted. The swordsman and the waiter-maintained eye contact, ensuring they never gave an opening.
"Tell them to wait."
"Why let him eat, when he's going to starve in some cell eventually?"
"So, you only have the guts to fight him if he's weak, pathetic."
"Strong or weak doesn't matter. I just happened to stumble across it."
"Then stumble back into your seat, this doesn't concern you."
"'Fraid, it does."
"I see. You'll get the same."
"Haha! Bring it." The pristine white blade was drawn, the metallic sheen obvious even from this distance. Where's the redheaded negotiator when you need her? Currently on her way out of the building. Everyone's attention gathered on the spectacle at the door, meanwhile the tricky thief slinked through the back.
I could ask for worse company, guess I'll follow. Grabbing a loose piece of paper as I followed the navigator. I left the building. Hopefully this won't be the last I see of them. Things were just getting interesting.
I'll leave a hint for them, knowing them they'll follow her. If the captain is ever released from his indentured servitude to this place.
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Word count: 3637
Honestly, not the proudest of this chapter. I felt like I was spinning my wheels quite a bit. Lots of characters to introduce and can't tell if I managed to do it in a meaningful way. At least it was a bit different from canon, which would've felt slightly more tedious.
As always let me know your thoughts on the story so far.
Anyone waiting for Class C: Civil War; I know I said the 30th or 1st but the weekend flew by me. It'll probably be another day or two before that's released. Apologies for the wait, if there was any. I'd rather release something I think is halfway decent than keep to a promised deadline and put out something I'm completely dissatisfied with.
Until next time