It is Easiest to be Obsessed by Everyone

“Hey, Lee Chang-woo. I know what you’re doing. You’re just spouting a few sweet phrases you memorized to get away with this, huh?”  

This girl, Hwang Ah-young. Had she always been this gullible?  

She refused to believe even with my German pronunciation. I was even praised by my German professor.  

Come on, do you really think the original Chang-woo could pull this off?  

“Warum tun Sie mir das an?”  

(Why are you doing this to me?)  

I shrugged my shoulders and made a puzzled face.  

A gesture I often used when cornered while briefing the policy department people.  

I didn’t stop there. 

I pulled out my phone and dialed a random number.  

Luckily, someone unknown picked up.  

I busied myself into an exaggeratedly enthusiastic conversation in German and talked for a good minute.  

Something like, “Your child is so adorable. I hope they grow up to be as wonderful as you.”  

I ended with a regretful goodbye and hung up.  

Then, I looked at Hwang Ah-young, shrugged again, and gave her a look that said, ‘Why are you still here?’

After this performance, Hwang Ah-young finally showed some doubt.  

“Uh… Is he really not Chang-woo?”  

“Hey, Chang-woo can’t do that. You can’t just memorize stuff like that. His pronunciation is completely fluent.”  

“It’s just someone who looks like him. Let’s apologize and leave.”  

“But how can someone who looks exactly like Chang-woo be born in Germany? What kind of bizarre situation is this?”  

Hwang Ah-young seemed lost and finally bowed her head with a very embarrassed expression.  

“Uh. I’m very, very sorry.”  

I finished it off with a relaxed nod.  

Once I saw them heading back to their table, I quickly sent a text to Jung Hyena.  

[Me] Hye-na, don’t come here. There’s someone who knows me.  

[Me] I pretended to be someone else, but they seem suspicious.  

[Me] It’d look more strange if I leave immediately, so I’ll go in a few minutes.  

[Me] Wait for me at the intersection.  

[Jung Hyena] Got it, ♡  

I ordered a glass of beer, finished it in three gulps, and then got up.  

I acted like someone who stops for a single beer after work on their way home.  

That was the impression I wanted to leave.  

As I paid, I glanced over. 

The three women were no longer focused on me. Instead, they laughed and chatted among themselves.  

‘Phew! I’m safe.’

“Uh… Six hundred won, please.”  

“Here, it’s ten thousand won.”  

“…?”  

“Also, I think it was six thousand won, not six hundred.”

‘Why am I speaking English? In what way does Chang-woo look like an American?’

‘Now that I think about it, his skin does have a slight northern European tone.’

Ah! She must have seen me pretending to be a second-generation foreigner with Hwang Ah-young.  

Just to be sure, I glanced at Hwang Ah-young’s table without making it obvious.  

As soon as I left the shop, I quickly moved in the direction where Jung Hyena was waiting.  

Of course, my most beautiful Hyena stood out even in the crowded Friday night streets.  

I could spot her from a distance.  

“Ah! Oppa.”  

Jung Hyena quickly recognized me and waved her hand with a bright smile.  

When I saw her outfit, I couldn’t help but smile proudly.  

A white blouse with a black blazer and an H-line skirt.  

Her long legs were wrapped in black stockings with blue high heels adding a little flair.  

“Hyena, you look like a new attorney at a law firm.”  

“Oh, come on. I didn’t even go to college; it’s embarrassing when you say that.”  

“Hey. College isn’t everything… I didn’t go either, so who cares?”  

We stood there for a moment, laughing together.  

Then suddenly, her eyes went wide as she looked behind me.  

Tap.  

Someone placed a hand on my shoulder from behind.  

A cold shiver ran down my spine.  

‘Don’t… turn around.’

“Of course. There can’t be another person on this earth who looks like Lee Chang-woo. Wow! You even speak German? Your accent was impressive.”  

Damn! It was Hwang Ah-young.  

In less than a split second, countless thoughts raced through my head.  

Should I just start rambling in German again and pretend not to know what’s going on? 

Should I keep playing dumb?  

“And who is this chick? The new girl? Well, she’s… Pretty. Ugh! How annoying.”  

“Excuse me.”  

“Hey, look at me when you talk.”  

‘Why am I suffering for Lee Chang-woo’s past mistakes?’

‘Because I inherited the life of a handsome guy.’

‘It’s impossible to inherit only assets and leave out debts…’

‘What’s wrong with me?’

‘Why am I internally ranting about nonsense right now?’

“Um. Ms. Ah-young, whoever you are—”  

“You just called my name, didn’t you?”  

Crap.  

I’d completely lost my mind. 

How could I call her name out loud?  

Jung Hyena looked bewildered. She didn’t know what to do.  

I understood. 

Look at that vicious expression on Hwang Ah-young’s face.  

Our sweet, gentle Hyena was barely 20 years old. She couldn’t even breathe properly in front of someone like that—huh?  

‘Huh? Huhh? Huhhh?’

‘W-what’s going on?’

‘What’s happening?’

Something soft was smothering my breath.

In front of my eyes, long black hair swayed.  

Cold, slender fingers gripped my cheeks tightly.  

I stood there, frozen, and then realized—  

Hwang Ah-young had just planted a surprise kiss on me.  

Right in front of Jung Hyena.  

———

It was an electrifying sight that even young people on the quest to enjoy their Friday night couldn’t help but stop and watch.  

A very pretty girl.  

An unbelievably stunning girl.  

And a ridiculously handsome guy whose features appeared statistically impossible.  

Even just a sudden street drama would be interesting enough to make people pause, but then—  

The unbelievably stunning girl suddenly kissed the handsome guy.  

The onlookers’ eyes now locked on this insanely beautiful girl.  

The slight tremor of her fingertips was visible under the neon lights.  

How would this insanely beautiful girl respond in the next scene?  

In the heads of these onlookers-turned-audience, dopamine was firing off like crazy.  

———-

Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!  

It wasn’t dopamine but an adrenaline bomb going off in my head.  

I was a frog bitten on the butt by a snake.

If I didn’t think of a way to survive in 0.01 seconds, I’d die from the venom.  

What should I do? What did I do wrong?  

The answer came through the process of elimination.  

The mistake started back at the beer pub.  

I escaped the crisis using ‘actions Chang-woo wouldn’t do.’  

I shouldn’t have done that.  

I should’ve flipped the whole situation using ‘actions Chang-woo would do.’  

Since I didn’t do that, Hwang Ah-young followed me secretly, leading to this mess.  

If I were Chang-woo—  

If I were the original Chang-woo, the one whose life I inherited as someone born to be handsome—  

What would he do in this situation?  

Just then, I noticed Hwang Ah-young’s two friends watching intently from behind.  

That’s it.  

Tap.  

I grabbed Hwang Ah-young’s shoulder and gently pushed her away.  

To be honest, a kiss from a beauty feels good, but—  

That’s just my pathetic desire talking, so let’s ignore it.  

Pushing Hwang Ah-young aside, I glared at her two friends.  

“Hey. What are you two doing?”  

“Huh?”  

“Ch-Chang-woo? Why us…?”  

‘This is it. This is how Chang-woo acts.’

He talked down to his ex-girlfriend’s friends without hesitation, the rude jerk.  

However. Is ex-girlfriend even the right term here?  

“This is happening because you two didn’t keep her in check.”  

“Uh… Is that…?”  

“Wait. So it’s our fault? Really?”  

“Then is it my fault? You two know well how Hwang Ah-young’s eyes go crazy at the drop of a hat. Unless you weren’t really her friends?”  

“…  Ah-young does go a bit crazy when it comes to you, Chang-woo.”  

“Please manage your friend properly. What’s this in the middle of the street? Aren’t you embarrassed? Why were you just standing there watching?”  

“Oh, Chang-woo. After listening to you, now I feel embarrassed.”  

“Ah-young, let’s just go.”  

Hwang Ah-young suddenly screamed at the top of her lungs.  

“Hey! Lee Chang-woo!”  

My heart almost dropped.

A former incel’s mentality had no resistance to such hysterical outbursts from a beautiful woman. 

I desperately tried to keep my ‘Lee Chang-woo’ jerk persona intact.

“What now?”  

“Lee Chang-woo! Why are you doing this to me?”  

“Why are you doing this in public? I told you it’s embarrassing and not to act like this.”  

“When did you ever say that? You used to love it when I had my meltdowns! You’d laugh and encourage me to scream and go crazy!”  

Damn…  

I almost kneeled down and apologized on the spot.  

Hwang Ah-young was now bawling her eyes out.  

“I told you! I wouldn’t care if you saw other girls, just check in with me so I know you’re alive! When you disappear without a word, I go mad, staring at my phone endlessly! Don’t drive me crazy! Didn’t I say that?”  

She did say that…  

I remembered…  

I found out way too late that I was in a one-sided fling after I got coldly dumped by my crush…  

“You bastard! You’re a real bastard! A complete jerk! Really… Ugh… You’re such a…!”  

“Ah-young, stop it. Please.”  

“You bitches! Don’t stop me!”  

Hwang Ah-young thrashed around, but her two friends held her firmly by the arms, refusing to let go.  

“Remember, you told us to break your legs if you ever did something this embarrassing in front of Chang-woo again. Got it?”  

“You’re gonna regret this tomorrow. You’ll yell at us again, asking why we didn’t stop you sooner.”  

“Look, Chang-woo. We weren’t watching for fun. We were waiting in the wings to step in if Ah-young crossed the line. You know that, right?”  

Is… Is that what it was?  

“Let go! Let go of me, you bitches!”  

“Come on, let’s go.”  

“Ugh! This is so embarrassing. Let’s just go.”  

“Chang-woo, take care. By the way, seeing you speak German was really impressive. I didn’t know your brain was this sexy too.”  

And with that, the three girls left.  

Leaving behind only a bitter and painful aftertaste.  

I felt utterly miserable.  

What’s even more infuriating is that acting like ‘Lee Chang-woo’ was the right call.

What if I’d handled it the way I usually would have instead of using the old Chang-woo way?  

It would have dragged on, embarrassing both Hyena and me.  

Yeah.  

Clearing it up in a minute or two was the right move.  

“So what should we eat now?”  

Hyena linked her arm with mine. She smiled brightly as if nothing had happened.  

She wasn’t bothered at all by what had just happened.

She acted as if she had neither seen nor heard anything at all.  

She must have always done this whenever she was with Lee Chang-woo.  

Perhaps this was the correct way to behave around him.  

Maybe, just maybe, Hyena recalled some of her past trauma after seeing how I dealt with Hwang Ah-young just now.  

I tried my best to give her a soft and gentle smile.  

“I could really go for a cold beer. Let’s go get some beer.”  

“Sounds good. I’m craving a cold beer too. Let’s go!”  

An incident I hadn’t wanted to happen occurred.  

I dealt with it in a way I hadn’t wanted to.  

Only then did the outcome I wanted finally ensued.  

I could really use that beer right now.  

———

The short drama ended as the handsome man and beautiful woman walked away arm in arm.  

The audience quietly reflected on the events they’d just witnessed.  

They neither spoke to each other nor exchanged glances, yet they all shared a sense of understanding about what they were feeling.  

The audience resumed their roles as passersby, continuing on their way.  

But this brief flash mob performance on a Friday night would linger in their minds for a long time.