I Flirted with the General in the Zerg Empire [Interstellar]

Teasing

Phoebe, with his baby face, leaned casually against a soft pillow, brushing his hair back with one hand. “What’s up? You look all flushed, yet you still have the energy for a video call. Didn’t Lord He Yi satisfy you?”

Zhao frowned and remained silent.

He didn’t get to see Star Officer Ze as he had hoped, but he heard Ze’s sweet and coquettish voice beside Phoebe, “Lord, the general is calling me. He must have something important. Can I have my device back? Please?”

“Pretty please~”

Zhao clicked his tongue. He was tempted to knock over this bowl of dog food.

Phoebe, smug, waved the screen just out of Ze’s reach, laughing as he dodged Ze’s fingers. “Be good, don’t move. It’s so late—what could possibly be so urgent?”

After calming the female servant, he teased across the screen, “General Zhao, do you need something? If not, I’ll hang up now. Ze and I are busy contributing to the Zerg reproduction cause.”

Zhao hung up the call with an expressionless face.

The good mood he had just been in was mostly gone. What bad luck—just when he had the chance to show off, he ended up getting a face full of lovey-dovey nonsense.

Was he… showing off to no one?

But General Zhao, who had just shown off to no one, wasn’t discouraged. He took a deep breath, scrolled through his contacts, and immediately made a video call to Deputy Creek.

He reassured himself: It’s fine, if I can’t show off to my married friends, I can surely show off to Deputy Creek, that older, unmarried female who spends all day sucking up to males, right?

As he expected, within a few seconds, the call connected.

However, something seemed off about the camera angle. If Zhao wasn’t mistaken, Deputy Creek was lying on his back in bed, with the camera pointing down at him.

“Good evening, General,” Creek greeted with a yawn.

Zhao, learning from experience, decided to start the conversation. “Creek, my Lord just tucked me in.” His tone was as calm as usual, but the joy in his eyes was impossible to hide.

“Huh?” Creek rubbed his sleepy eyes, waiting for his general to continue.

However, General Zhao, who was still new to showing off, clearly hadn’t grasped the essence of it. He just stood there, waiting to see the envy on Deputy Creek’s face.

“That’s it?” Creek looked puzzled. “General, let me get this straight—your Lord, Lord He Yi, tucked you in? And then what?”

“Didn’t you two sleep together?”

General Zhao was caught off guard and choked on the question.

What could he say? That yes, they hadn’t slept together? Obviously not. So, the quick-thinking General Zhao awkwardly changed the subject, “Why are you so sweaty? Were you just working out?”

Speaking of which, Deputy Creek perked up, his face lighting up like he’d won the lottery. With a mysterious smile, he said, “Yes, working out—with my Lord Hila, just now!”

“General, I’m so happy! Not long after returning from the desolate star, Lord Hila agreed to my proposal!”

The smell of love filled the entire screen.

He threw off the blanket and shyly bragged, “Look, I’m preparing for pregnancy now.”

Zhao glanced at the greenish-purple marks on Creek’s body, then noticed how his tailbone was propped up high by pillows. Was this… the standard posture for retaining the male lord’s favor?

He Was Mistaken.

Deputy Creek didn’t look like he had just woken up—he clearly looked like he had just been thoroughly satisfied.

The feelings of envy and jealousy grew wildly in General Zhao’s heart. He forced a stiff smile, “Congratulations, you got what you wanted.”

Deputy Creek cheerfully pulled the blanket back over himself, “Same to you, General. After all, you’ve also gained the favor of Lord He Yi, haven’t you?”

Zhao thought to himself: Is the meat pie already in your mouth the same as the veggie pie still hanging in front of you?

But alas, his Lord… is still underage!

Zhao had never tasted lemon before, but right now, he felt like he was turning into one. With a pursed lip, he asked, “By the way, didn’t you collect a lot of study materials last time? Could you share them?”

Since he couldn’t outpace others in getting closer to his Lord, he could at least improve his skills in pleasing him.

He was determined to become an experienced Zerg!

“Sure, I’ve got a few hundred terabytes,” Deputy Creek replied with a satisfied grin, looking like he deserved a beating, “You can go through them at your own pace. Just a friendly tip—if you watch them with Lord He Yi, the effect will be even better… hehe.”

Zhao vaguely acknowledged, already planning to increase Deputy Creek’s workload a bit later.

Once he confirmed the data transfer was complete, Zhao’s face returned to a calm expression, “Thanks. It’s getting late, I’m hanging up now.”

He quickly ended the call. With the seriousness of someone studying academic papers, Zhao skimmed through the titles of the hundreds of terabytes of video material. Among a long list of titles that would make anyone blush, he picked one that seemed proper and fitting for his status.

—”Guide for Military Females Post-Marriage”

The opening featured a beautifully shot, slightly whimsical landscape video.

He silently praised it: Nicely filmed.

Selecting the immersive viewing mode, he projected the video onto the wall opposite him and adjusted his bed to a reclined pillow mode, half-closing his eyes as he awaited the main content.

Soon, a tall and upright military female appeared on the screen.

What followed was five entire star minutes of the military female sensually removing every bit of his already sheer and transparent clothing. Then, with nimble hands, he started pleasuring himself from head to toe, in countless ways, opening the viewer’s eyes to new possibilities.

The video’s audio was filled with a hoarse voice, a mix of pain and pleasure. When the military female picked up a dark red rope covered in tiny soft spikes from the floor, Zhao was already feeling parched.

“Ah Zhao, do you like this?”

Hot breath brushed against his ear, and a deep voice reverberated through his eardrums, pounding into his heart—thump, thump, thump.

Zhao jumped in fright and turned to see his Lord standing by the bed, unclear how long he had been watching.

His pupils shook!

“Scared? You seemed pretty engrossed; you didn’t even hear me knock,” He Yi raised an eyebrow with a smile.

Zhao was so shocked he couldn’t think straight. Instinctively, he scooted to the side, nervously fiddling with the thin blanket. His throat bobbed uncontrollably, “My Lord, when… when did you come in?”

He Yi’s eyes flickered slightly.

He leaned in, cupping Zhao’s flushed face with both hands, studying him with interest. “So timid? You’re so scared, why? Not happy to see me?”

Zhao barely heard what He Yi said. He was overwhelmed by a rush of fiery pheromones, which transformed into countless little flames, teasing the string of reason in his heart.

In a flash, countless images crossed his mind:

How he would undress, how he would seduce his Lord, how he would be devoured…

Control yourself, control yourself, Zhao ,Zhao!

Zhao shook his head slightly, trying hard to dispel the chaotic thoughts swirling in his mind. His eyes were tinged with red as he explained, “My Lord, I… I just… I didn’t…” He wasn’t the kind of Zerg who would behave so wantonly behind his Lord’s back.

Right now, he was filled with regret—deep regret!

He wished he could cut off the hands that had just selected the immersive mode!

Seeing that Zhao was about to lose it, He Yi stopped teasing him and nodded seriously, “Alright, I understand… Don’t worry, I respect your preferences.”

After all, as the saying goes, heroes don’t care about where they come from, and rogues don’t care about their age.

Despite He Yi’s calm demeanor now, when he first walked in, he was stunned: Is Zhao’s taste really this intense?!

Zhao: …

No, he’s not.

He usually avoids any movies with even a hint of suggestiveness, preferring those very niche, pure romance films. And because his tastes are so niche and unique, he’d exhausted all those films on the market and recently switched to reading novels.

The video in the room continued to play. A well-dressed male Zerg had joined the scene, intimately entangled with the military female, their lips and teeth mingling. The sound of wet noises echoed.

Both Zergs outside the screen felt a familiar heat building. They turned their heads simultaneously to the indescribable scene on screen, then looked at each other.

The scene was seductive.

The sound was seductive.

The shy and bashful Zhao was also seductive.

And He Yi was the one being seduced.

Shy, Zhao awkwardly swallowed, slowly raised a paw, and turned off the video.

—

Despite both Zergs being embarrassed by the “proper” study material the night before, the next day, they tacitly chose to forget, acting as if nothing had happened.

As for what they really thought deep down, only they would know.

Only the pillow on Zhao’s bed, pounded flat in anger and shame, knew his frustration. And only the two sets of pajamas changed in He Yi’s room knew his awkward embarrassment.

Regardless, the next morning in the dining room, He Yi calmly and leisurely enjoyed his luxurious breakfast, while General Zhao, as usual, quietly accompanied him, gnawing on a rare energy block and sipping on premium nutritional fluid.

He Yi remained composed as he watched General Zhao, as steady as a rock, leave the villa and board the aircraft bound for the military headquarters.

With a heart as calm as still water, He Yi said, “Zhao, see you tonight.”

General Zhao kept a straight face: “See you tonight, my Lord.”

Their tone, expression, and even the way they waved goodbye were almost indistinguishable from the day before.

Neither of them showed the slightest hint of awkwardness.

However, as soon as General Zhao activated the autopilot on his spacecraft, he covered his burning cheeks and collapsed lifelessly onto the comfortable recliner. Meanwhile, He Yi, who had just returned to the living room, buried his head in despair and flopped onto the soft sofa, utterly defeated.

At that moment, they were both on the same wavelength: Ahhh, that was so embarrassing!

—

Because of last night’s “movie” incident, He Yi didn’t do much else today. He spent the entire day on the emotional discussion boards of the StarNet forums.

He may not have eaten pork, but he should at least know how pigs run.

Although, in He Yi’s opinion, most of the views on romance in those discussion boards were somewhat twisted, the little tips on emotional relationships were quite useful.

For instance, physical contact should be gradual.

Simply put, you should start by holding hands when the atmosphere is right. After holding hands, you can kiss when the mood becomes even more intimate. Physical contact is somewhat like a confession—progressing step by step makes both parties more comfortable.

Another example is that dates are essential.

One highly upvoted post stated: You don’t have to be in love, but you must go on dates. Dates not only allow you to showcase your personal charm but also help deepen your relationship. The more He Yi read, the more he felt it made sense.

He rubbed his chin and decided: A date, let’s schedule one!

Being a person of action, He Yi decided to have a sweet date with Zhao tonight.

After all, when it comes to dating, the sooner, the better.

As for those bizarre and daring dating tips in the discussion boards, He Yi didn’t adopt any of them. Instead, he chose the classic Earth-style date trilogy: dinner, shopping, and a movie!

He first sent Zhao a text:

“Zhao Zhao, don’t leave after work. Meet me at the military headquarters’ entrance. I have a surprise for you~~ [Lord Loves You Forever.jpg]”