Heroine Hunter

I stood up from behind the counter and approached the orc.

“You bastards must’ve lost your minds…”

Eve turned to me with a look of shock on her face. 

The orc’s subordinate scowled.

“What? What did you just say?”

“You think you can just come in here and try to steal my employee right in front of me? Are you insane?”

I ignored the subordinate and looked up directly at the orc that was called the boss.

[Gale]  

[Occupation: Ruler of the Red-Light District/Servant of Dark Magic]

He looked down at me with amusement.

“Do you even know who I am?” 

“Aren’t you the guy who makes a living off the money you squeeze out of girls selling their bodies in the red-light district?”

The orc next to him immediately got angry.

“This little bastard—!”

But the boss held him back.

“You’re an amusing one.”

I casually put my hands in my pockets and spoke.

“Yeah, well, I happen to be pretty close with the captain of the royal military police. He always stops by here to buy a fresh bunny beast-woman onahole.”

“Interesting.”

The orc chuckled.

I tilted my head in confusion.

“What’s so funny? Being around the red-light district all the time must have ruined your sense of humor.”

“You’re talking about Captain Panto, right? He comes to our street often, always asking for a rabbit beast-woman. We’re quite close too.”

Crap. 

I tried to drop a name, and it backfired.

Well. This just got awkward. 

I scratched my head, unsure of what to say next.

“Ahem! Well then, how about we call it a day and leave before we cause trouble for the captain of the military police?”

“Panto? That bastard’s in my pocket. Do you really think he’d side with a guy who sells onaholes? Huh?”

Damn it! How dare he hit me with the reality like that!

He nodded toward Eve, continuing, “If I say I’m taking this girl, what exactly do you think you can do? Fight me?”

CRASH!

In an instant, the glass door of the shop shattered. 

Gale, the red-light district boss, flew out of the shop like a cannonball, crashing through the door.  

BAM!

He slammed into the wall across the street. He was stuck there like a fossil embedded in the wall, arms and legs spread in the shape of a 大.

“You little punk. I told you to leave.”

I’d always been unsure of how much power I was packing when hitting people, but this gave me a good sense of it. 

Looks like this was roughly my range.

“Bossss!!”

The orc subordinate let out a desperate wail before turning to me, seething.

“You son of a—!”

He swung a fist at me in blind rage. 

I considered using Indestructible Body and taking the hit to gauge how much force I could handle, but before the punch even landed, my body instinctively dodged it.

I deflected his incoming fist and lightly jabbed his throat with my fingertips.

“Gahh!”

He clutched his throat, dropping to his knees.

I grabbed his head and kneed him in the face.

CRACK!

Without so much as a scream, he lost consciousness, blood pouring from his nose.

“Eve, stay inside. Don’t come out.”

Eve froze with shock and instinctively nodded her head. 

I grabbed the orc underling by the hair and dragged him outside. 

The boss orc was still stuck in the wall. He had managed to regain consciousness.

“Ugh…”

I threw the underling down on the ground, then stepped up to the red-light district boss. 

He blinked a few times before recognizing me, scowling.

“Urgh… You bastard…”

Suddenly, his eyes turned red.

“I can smell blood… A thick, revolting stench.”

“Urgh…”

He struggled to free himself from the wall, causing debris to crumble to the ground. 

By now, a crowd had gathered around us.

“You’re using dark magic, aren’t you?”

He growled in response.

“There’s no way a meathead like you learned magic. You probably had it etched into your skin.”

I ripped his shirt open, revealing tattoos on both sides of his chest. They pulsated like something out of a horror show.

“Well, well, look at this.”

Despite the crowd watching, he was still trying to use dark magic, clearly determined to kill me no matter the cost.

“Listen up, I don’t care about the tattoos, but any thug with dark magic tattoos is banned from my store.”

Before he could fully activate his magic, I landed a punch right in his solar plexus.

Thud.

Crack.

It sounded like bones were breaking.

“Urghhh!”

The orc, who had been trying to pull himself out of the wall, coughed up black blood and slumped back against it.

“When the guards get here, you’ll be dragged off and hanged immediately.”

I turned to check on the orc underling lying on the ground.

“Now, what should I do with you?”

Suddenly, Eve’s voice rang out urgently.

“Boss! Behind you!”

Yeah. I already knew.

I had to give the orc boss one last chance to try and kill me before the guards arrived. 

Otherwise, he could pretend like he didn’t know anything about dark magic.

If I left an opening, he would take it.

Sure enough.

[I’ll kill him, no matter what, even if I have to use dark magic!]

The orc’s body turned a blood-red hue, twisting grotesquely. 

Freed from the wall, he had transformed into a demon with sharp, menacing teeth and came charging toward me.

“Ugh. Disgusting.”

His appearance was enough to make me grimace.

Before he could reach me, I snapped my fingers.

[Holy Explosion]

Golden sparks enveloped the demon.

Crack.

The demon’s neck and spine twisted violently.

“Huh?”

With that, he collapsed to the ground, dead.

The crowd, who had been silently watching, began to murmur in awe. 

I turned to reassure them.

“Don’t worry, everyone. It’s just holy magic dealing with a fool who dabbled in dark arts.”

The idea of a back-alley sex toy shop owner using holy magic… I just hoped they didn’t stick me with some weird nickname. 

People in this world always do that—like ‘Red-Haired Sieg,’ ‘Saint of the White Rose,’ or ‘Emilia, the Empire’s Ruby.’

“Did you see that? He took down a demon!”

“The Dildo King took down a demon!”

“Holy magic, no less.”

“Holy Dildo King!”

“Saint Onahole! Saint Onahole!”

These bastards.

I had a feeling, but this is too much. 

‘I did something good, so why does it feel like I’m being bullied?’

Amidst the cheers, I squatted down next to the fallen orc underling.

Smack!

I slapped him across the face.

“Hey, get up. I know you’re faking it.”

“…”

“Oh, come on. Do I have to put a hole in your head for you to—”

The orc opened his eyes and blinked.

“Wha—? Where am I? Who am I?”

He blinked at me with innocent, confused eyes.

I nodded.

“Yeah, sure. Keep going with that.”

He noticed the corpse of the demon beside him and then turned to me.

“Did you save me from that monster? Thank you so much!”

The underling clasped his hands together like a little girl.

I sighed.

“Don’t ever try acting again, got it?”

“…”

“Answer me.”

The spark of hope faded from his eyes.

“… Yes.”

[Digo]  

[Occupation: Right-hand man of the red-light district boss]

“Your name?”

“Me?”

I smacked him on the head. 

Smack!

“Is your name ‘Me’?”

“Agh! Digo, Digo! It’s Digo!”

“Is your name Digo-Digo-Digo?”

“Just… Digo.”

He rubbed his head where I’d hit him.

“Mind your words?”

“It’s Digo, sir.”

“Alright, Digo. Starting today, you’re the boss of the red-light district.”

“Huh?”

[Digo]  

[Occupation: Red-light district boss (by force)]

“From now on, if any of your guys are caught wandering around this side of the street, you’re the one who’s going to die. Got it?”

I held up my fist in front of his face.

“Uh…”

Digo looked like he wanted to object.

“You don’t like it? Come here, let’s look in the mirror. I’ll show you what your brain looks like when I put a hole in your head.”

He frantically waved his hands.

“No, no! That’s not it! Can’t we just walk around without doing bad things? I usually just go to that bakery over there…”

Digo said meekly.

‘That bakery?’

‘Well, it is cheap and tasty.’

“Fine, I’ll allow that.”

“Thank you.”

“And from now on, every condom and sex toy used in the red-light district comes from our shop. If anyone has a problem with that, they’ll get a hole in their head. Got it?”

“No problem at all.”

“Good. Now for a test: if your guys say they want to avenge your dead boss, what will you say?”

His eyes widened, and I could almost hear the rusty gears in his brain creaking to life. 

He scrambled to come up with an answer before I hit him again.

“Oh! Oh! I’ll tell them the boss messed with someone close to the Imperial family, and that’s why he was taken out.”

“Not bad. You don’t practice black magic, right?”

“No, sir!”

Digo nodded his head vigorously.  

I patted him on the shoulder.  

“Let’s do well.”  

“Yes, sir!”

Dusting off my hands, I stood up and headed back to the shop. 

Eve stood there, her mouth slightly open, staring at me.

“Boss, what was that just now?”

I smiled at her.  

“Well? Think I’m ready to enter a knight’s tournament now?”

[What? He’s super strong and can use magic too? That’s why he said he’d enter the tournament.]

Eve looked away, nervously fidgeting with her hands.  

“Well, if you just learned some swordsmanship…”

[What’s wrong with me? I must be crazy. How could I even think about wanting the boss to… You know… in this situation?]

“Eve?”  

“Yes?”

She looked at me with hopeful eyes.  

“I should look into getting the door fixed.”  

“Huh? Oh… Yes, I’ll call someone right away.”

I stretched and collapsed into a chair, exhausted.  

“It’s been a while since I’ve used that much strength. I’m tired.”  

I closed my eyes, waiting for the guards to arrive.

A little while later, the guards came and took away the monster’s corpse.  

“Eve, I’m too tired. Let’s save the condom reviews for tomorrow.”

‘I’ll make her wait, keep her wanting it a little more.’

“Yes…” 

Eve gently touched the pink ♡ on her lower abdomen.  

[Sigh. Iain Castoloni, you bad man…]  

She would have to wait until morning with the ♡ on her womb glowing brightly.

———

The next morning.

After finishing my shower, I walked out to find Eve sitting at the edge of the bed, wearing a blue, one-piece lingerie set. 

When she saw me, she quickly turned her head away. 

Her expression was a mix of nervousness and maybe a little bit of annoyance.

Beneath the sheer blue lingerie, I could faintly see the glowing ♡ on her lower belly.  

‘She’s really turned on, huh?’

Eve fiddled with the set of condoms placed beside the bed.  

“We need to review these in the morning…”

“What’s with that sexy outfit?”

“Oh, this? I thought maybe I could put this on one of the mannequins downstairs and write a review for it. What do you think?”

She gently placed her hands on her chest.  

“That’s a good idea. You’re trying to sell clothes too?”

“No. That’s not it.”  

“Huh?”  

“… Does it look good on me?”  

Eve bit her lip and turned her gaze away. 

I approached her, letting my impressive holy asset dangle freely.