Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse

*Grrrrrrrr*

A guttural snarl welcomes Kai as he opens his eyes in an acquainted space. Given the snarl, he sensitively refrains from pointing out how choked the voice felt.

A long hall without a visible ceiling leads gazes into the darkness. A shallow pool of water exudes the only source of light in this world that reflects upon the gigantic, red eyes of the furry orange monster.

"Look," Kai begins with a clear of his throat, "This is weird for me, too. I told Kushina that doing stuff as I speak with you is weird. I stand corrected."

But Kyubi wasn't having any of it. Her large claws inch forward. Her hill-like head leans down to tower over the puny human. The feeling of something thick and hard slamming into her throat makes it hard to talk. Better yet, it makes it hard for her to even think straight like her foolish host, so all she can do is let out a breathless snarl once again to come across as threatening.

Facing the razor-sharp fang of the Kyubi that reflects his face, Kai groans in equal annoyance.

"You think I ain't annoyed?" Kai growls back and lets his consciousness float until he meets the monster's gaze.

"It was fun thinking that I fucked you literally," He emphasizes. "But I didn't need the image of it. I should have never done it with Kushina. She won't leave me for a fucking second! But what do I do? I sack up and fuck her whenever she craves it. I could have gotten here hours ago and started my work!"

Kyubi's orange fur bristles as she growls.

"You get no right to—" Her breath hitches as the damnable host of hers slides down the entire shaft of the man in front of her and kisses the base of his crotch with threads of saliva sputtering out. Kyubi herself feels a proportionally monstrous cock choking her breath out. Understanding what she might be going through, Kai forms a seal as Kyubi's senses ease slightly.

"It's a Genjutsu," Kai explains calmly. "You can break out of it easily, but I hope we can discuss without… Kushina fucking the both of us."

How the tables have turned.

It's true.

An eager and insatiable Kushina wraps her lips around his cock and bobs her head under his desk in his research lab while he is here to chat with Kyubi. He needs physical contact with Kushina to enter this space, and she was more than happy to present him with something… physical.

Reluctantly accepting this moment of respite, Kyubi questions in her harsh tone, "Why are you here?"

"You should know."

"And why would I help someone like you?"

"Because I'm the one who got you out of the chains?" Kai ponders aloud. "I'm also the one who helped Kushina develop her current seal reducing the need for her painful chains to pick up the slack. If you want more reasons, I can tell you that I would be getting my hand on a tailed-beast one way or the other if it means increasing my strength. One tail, two tails, three tails… you get my drift, don't you?"

"If Mito-sama can divide you, I can divide other beasts, too. But I would prefer not to try these extreme methods. Kushina got very strong when she got a different enhancement from you—"

"Get to the point!" Kyubi butts in.

"I want to learn the difference between your chakra and mine. If it is possible to mimic your chakra, it can form into a Jutsu. That would rid me of the need to become a host for a tailed beast. Of course, the high chakra reserve of a jinchuriki is desirable, but I prefer efficient strength over a large pool of chakra."

It is true. While his chakra pool is comparable to a Kage… he is behind Kushina again. It's the same as when they used to be kids.

Not to discredit Kai's hard work, his chakra pool is above clan geniuses like Mikoto and Nawaki, but Kushina is a clear outlier and a freak of chakra.

So, Kai did not try to cover up what already is enough for him. Admittedly, he does feel his pool of chakra is lacking, but that is because of how chakra intensive the grind for mokuton has been. In reality, the amount of chakra in his possession allows him to spam his most destructive jutsus like there is no tomorrow.

And even then, Kai is most lethal when he uses simple techniques like the [Chakra Scalpel].

"Explain."

Kyubi grunts.

'Wow, easier than I thought—'

"Think foolishly again, and this discussion will end. Do not test me."

"Ah, forgot that you can sense emotions," Kai shrugs and then frowns. "The fuck is wrong with your double standards? Do you want me to sense your emotions, too? I can. And I will if you don't knock it out."

He cannot really control and hide his chakra. After all, he is a yin specter made out of chakra.

But his threats work wonders. Kyubi's claws sink into the metal surface under the pool of water. If gaze alone could kill someone, Kai would get bifurcated this instant.

There is no way Kyubi can ever let someone as devilish as Kai get privy to her emotions. But she cannot break the genjutsu and conserve her chakra to protect her thoughts right away. Beyond the genjutsu exists the sensation of something warm, thick, and pulsating sliding in and out of her throat— something she would rather not experience in front of him.

After a weak stare-down, Kyubi growls, "Explain what you mean?"

"I mean that I will check your emotions. If you like it, I'll design a seal that keeps you in a human-like form for my own mental well-being—"

"The other thing!"

The roar only makes Kai roll his eyes as he shrugs, "Not good with shitty jokes, are we? Oh, well."

Taking a breath to reorient himself and get his head out of the gutter, Kai looks at the beast, "Nature and shape transformation are the two components for a complete jutsu. What Kushina got from you is a type of Jutsu. Even her berserk state when your negativity flowed in her was a jutsu, too. The shape of that jutsu is a controlled or uncontrolled stream of chakra flowing through the body. That is the premise of every body-enhancement jutsu."

Eyeing Kyubi carefully, Kai smiles.

"I want to learn the chakra transformation. I will never believe that only you can create that kind of chakra. If that nature of chakra has a—"

"Give it up," Kyubi barks. The pair of her vertical pupils surrounded by pure red irides flicker with contempt.

"Why?" Kai frowns.

"You humans simply have no self-satisfaction. Just because Kushina earned something from me does not mean you are worthy of anything."

"And how do you measure this worth?" Kai inclines his head. He promised Kushina to treat Kyubi 'gently,' so he can't simply beat the cocky beast into submission.

"Why would I explain anything to you?" Kyubi bites back verbally. "You want the secrets of my chakra? Tough luck. Go! Find that old cunt! Let's see if my other half ever shared anything with her!"

Kai narrows his gaze quietly.

It was never going to be easy.

The enhancement that Kushina got was not less than his sage mode. The difference was the source of enhancement. Who knows? Maybe he could have mixed the two enhancements.

'Or Kushina can learn sage mode somehow,' Kai ponders, 'She already has more than enough chakra, but her mental state isn't optimal.'

"Are you sure?" Kai questions again.

Kyubi's whiskers sway as its bestial mouth widens into a savage grin—

"Fuck off."

Kai snaps his fingers as the genjutsu fades as the beast's pupils dilate.

But Kai doesn't spend a second longer in this space, too.

He fears his innocence might get tarnished— whatever remains of it.

Just because Kushina is an uncaring, slutty freak does not mean Kai can stomach it all.

He simply notes that Kyubi likes it down her throat just as much as her host and opens his eyes.

A soft sigh escapes his lips.

*Slurp*

*Slurp*

*Slurp*

He looks down to see his already milked cock getting wrung for its worth once again as Kushina feels his gaze and looks up with upturned violet eyes. She squints happily as his hand cradles the top of her head before indulging in her wet desires as he forces her head down with a soft groan.

*Ghhhk*

Her eyes widen as her sunken cheeks vacuum-sucking him inflates. Enjoying the explosion of cum inside her mouth, Kushina slowly pulls back and sucks on the glans of his head. Her tongue swirls around his tip, and her hands stroke his spit-sloppy shaft.

"Phuaaah~ There, all clean~ hehe. I told you I've been practicing what I can to surprise you, right?" Kushina smirks cockily. And she would look smug if tears weren't running down her cheeks— If white did not stain her lips and chin alongside her dripping spit.

"And I always believed you."

"Liar!" She pouts before licking her lips. "Did you get what you wanted… or do you need more contact?"

Kyubi now considered Kushina worse than Mito. So, Kushina got the same verbal assault.

"Bitch, stop wagging your ass like a cunt in heat!"

'Did I hear something? Must have been the wind.' Kushina ignores the beast.

"Nah, she did not want to play nice. But hey, as her host, you get to bear her responsibility."

Kai bunches the redhead's hair and pulls her head back slightly. An excited glint passes by Kushina's eyes as he leans down and whispers.

"We will have a lot more contact. We won't stop even if the sun sets. You better prepare your body."

"Yes~"

His lips press into her ear as he commands hotly, "I will wear you out. You will continue to remain in your chakra mode as we train."

"Huh?"

"No matter the hours, no matter the hunger. We will find as many differences as we can between regular chakra and your chakra mode."

"Wait—"

"Now I know you can move your body for hours without a single bowl of ramen."

He licks his lips and pecks her ear as Kushina falls into the pits of despair.

"I will make you beg and work for every bowl of ramen."

"But you're my guardian!" She whines.

"As they say, don't mix pleasure with your guardianship. Only hardship awaits you."

Ah, sweet grind and missed puns.

What a fulfilling life.

Even Kyubi will enjoy Kushina's hardships after three days of constant hazy lust.

— — —

"You're back."

Hiruzen welcomes his team with a smile. They should have returned three days ago. Meaning: it took a week for Team HIruzen to return to the village, and if Jiraiya hadn't kept in touch with Hiruzen, the Kage would have been worried.

"Of course we are!" Tsunade puffs her chest out with a proud grin. Orochimaru and Jiraiya stand by her side and sport varying degrees of exhausted expressions.

Noticing this, Hiruzen grows interested. If they failed their mission altogether as Jiraiya implied in one of his letters, Tsunade would not look so proud. Chances are that the mission experienced some unforeseen changes, and she managed to keep up.

"Here, Sensei. This is all of it." Orochimaru steps forward and presents a scroll.

'Not all of it,' Jiraiya rolls his eyes as his gaze subconsciously drifts to Orochi's wide hips and juicy buttocks.

'Really, the hints are all there.' The spymaster groans internally.

Instead of dismissing the trio, Hiruzen would decide what to do with their accomplishments right away.

Their mission is an undisclosed one but an S-ranked mission nonetheless. In fact, given the trio's ability, the mission's failure may suggest a revaluation of the threat that Takigakure poses entirely.

Time ticks away quietly.

Instead of a cursory glance, Hiruzen decrypts the text on the go and dives into the content thoroughly.

Jinchuriki's Forbidden Jutsu.

Taki already aware of the mission.

Ambush from Kumo and Iwa.

The more Hiruzen read, the more his annoyance deepened.

Finally, he mutters softly, "I see. Matters have indeed grown as troublesome as Shikudo predicted. The information from all sides will muddy the objectives of all five great villages."

"You know what is going on?" Tsunade questions.

"Not really," Hiruzen leans back on his chair, "I don't know what is going on, but I do know that our village is falling into the schemes of something larger. Take a seat. Before I explain the situation as is, let me congratulate you."

The Kage looks at Tsunade, "We can predict the use of Hero Water and what role it may play in the coming conflict. Not only did you collect many bounties, but you kept the more specialized captives safe from Utsu to A's son."

Hiruzen muses while stroking his chin.

"Can you research their bodies alongside working on Fukushu?"

Tsunade shrugs.

"I know what you're trying to get at. Let T&I Department start with A's son and Kakuzu. I inspected Utsu's corpse. He wiped his mind before his death using a cursed seal, so I will start from his body and the stuff Orochimaru got to determine the actual use of Hero Water and if its effects can be replicated."

Hiruzen nods after a while.

He then looks at Orochimaru and observes him critically.

"Is that true?" Hiruzen questions.

"It is," Orochimaru smiles calmly, "And it would please you to know that I have ascertained why Jiraiya may have trouble with his method, too."

The old Kage works his jaws.

Not on sage but two.

Two.

Both should be Kage-level by now, and Tsunade shouldn't be far.

Based on their accomplishments, Tsunade should already be considered a Kage-level threat.

"If it weren't for your strength, the enemy would have ambushed you perfectly. But this is a problem in itself. Chances are… your skills are now exposed to other villages already."

This bit makes Team Hiruzen frown.

Orochimaru already knew that be it his Sage Mode or other means, Hiruzen could only accept the knowledge and base his acts around these changes. After all, not everyone is expected to detail their growth to the village when it involves one of the three most mysterious locations.

However, Hiruzen did not reveal the sense of paranoia other villages' Kage would reveal if too many Kage-level shinobi grew around them.

If the Third Hokage truly holds such baseless apprehension, he would have feared Sakumo, too.

But the man has absolute trust in his team.

"That's good," Hiruzen nods.

"Jiraiya… you will stay and see what you can correct about your situation. But you are expected to leave the village next week and reevaluate your network again."

"Why?" Jiraiya thins his lips.

It's clear that something odd is occurring. Something that worries the old kage deeply.

"And that will be the next topic of our discussion," Hiruzen groans softly. "Get comfortable. This situation is oddly terrifying even for the likes of me."

***

Alternate Title: Awkward Greeting; Kushina Turns The Table; Then She Gets Under the Table; Something Thick in the Beast's Throat; Curtain of Genjutsu; Unworthy of the Power of Thor— Wrong Parody; Kai's Hammer is Worthy Enough; Promise of Grind; Kai will not let Kushina Rest, as She Wanted; Pits of Despair; Kyubi Will Enjoy It; Kushina making Two Monsters Orgasm at Once; Return of the Sannin; Numb Hiruzen; Proud Tsunade; Spoils of Conflict.

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