Even Zombies Have Fandoms

Chapter 74

Until now, Muyoung had naturally been fangirling over Seokjae in the same way Gwanghun treated his favorite idol. But he just realized that there isn’t only one way to be a fan.

Kim Gwanghun had a clear favorite, but he wasn’t a toxic solo stan who excluded or ignored other members. Rather, he was the type to give affection to all members equally. His principle was that it’s natural to love the people his favorite loves.

Of course, there was a difference in how he treated his favorite compared to other members. But Muyoung, who was ignorant about fan culture, thought there wasn’t much difference. He thought it was like how he liked both red bean and cream-filled fish-shaped pastries, but just preferred red bean a little more.

‘You’re saying I like our puppy and the kids the same way? No, that’s not it.’

And as always, while eating a free meal and listening to Gwanghun’s fan talk one day, the topic happened to come up. Gwanghun looked at Muyoung with a face that said “This is why non-fans don’t get it” and strongly denied it.

‘Why? You just said you wanted to bite Hayun and the maknae while watching their fancam.’

‘Well, they were wearing marine looks. How could I resist that? Ah, thinking about it again, I want to put them in my mouth and run away.’

‘They’re bigger than you, so you couldn’t swallow them. It seems like you really like them a lot, so what’s the difference? Isn’t it just that you like them all, but Song Yusong is your favorite?’

‘That’s different, I’m telling you!’

It was all the same idol-loving to him, so what difference could there be? His thoughts must have been clearly visible on his face because Gwanghun caught Muyoung, who was trying to run away after finishing his meal, and explained more passionately.

‘Our Songsong is the man who makes my heart race, and the other kids are my babies.’

‘…Your babies?’

‘Yeah. Who gets butterflies for their own baby? Even if they do a sexy dance, they just look cute.’

‘Some members are bigger and older than you, how are they your babies?’

‘Such trivial things don’t matter for children born from the heart.’

He had heard that quite a few people liked their favorite idols in this way, calling it “pseudo-parenting.” At that time, it seemed very strange that so many people could adore complete strangers as if they were their own children, to the point where there was a professional term for it…

‘I totally understand that feeling of being upset about not seeing their childhood. At this point, I guess I can think of hyung as my baby?’

Muyoung quickly recalled memories related to Gwanghun, his fangirling teacher, to maintain his fan life that was suddenly facing a major turning point, and finally found the answer.

And during that long yet short pause, Seokjae, excited by the lack of response, slowly traced Muyoung’s pale nape.

‘Where should I put my mouth…’

Biting might be dangerous if he can’t control his strength and draws blood, so maybe it’s better to suck and leave a mark. He’ll definitely scream, so it would be good to cover his mouth first.

Just as he was making plans that would be enjoyable no matter what he chose…

“Hyung.”

A call that instantly shattered Seokjae’s excitement was heard. The fingertips that had been cheerfully tapping along with his mood suddenly stopped.

Unaware of what he had done, Muyoung just looked at him with sparkling eyes, happy that his dilemma was resolved.

“I, I like you too, hyung.”

And unlike the problem that required digging through old memories to ponder over, he brought out the answer he had already decided on without needing to think.

“What?”

Seokjae, who had been frozen in disbelief at having the feast snatched away right before his eyes, or rather, from inside his mouth, came to his senses at the sudden confession.

“So I can understand why you worry about me. No. I completely understand. Because I feel the same way.”

“Ah.”

He could understand the source of the sudden confession only after hearing the following words. Muyoung was finally giving an answer to what he had said at first.

“I’ve found that it’s impossible not to worry about someone you like. I’m always worried that Kyungho and Junwoo might get hurt too.”

Muyoung, who had been steadfastly saying what he wanted to say, added the latter part, afraid that his favoritism towards Seokjae might show. Seokjae, who had been listening quietly while blinking his dark eyes, let out a laugh so short and faint it could be mistaken for a breath.

‘Judging by his laugh, I guess he’s not bothered by me worrying about him?’

Muyoung took that laugh as a positive sign, but the reality was different. It was a self-deprecating laugh.

‘As if I’m not lacking enough…’

His mood, which had soured after missing the perfect opportunity to taste what he wanted while being complacent, not only improved but even became somewhat joyful with just one word. Even though he knew that wasn’t the intended meaning.

The fingertips that had stopped due to his dampened mood started tapping lightly again, like a wagging tail. Seokjae casually stroked Muyoung’s waist and said,

“Then, it’s okay if I keep worrying like this, right?”

Flinch. Muyoung, who had been off guard, stiffened at the touch brushing past his waist. And belatedly, he became aware of his and Seokjae’s posture, which was even closer than before.

‘Isn’t this too close?’

When he first hugged him, Muyoung had bent his waist forward to keep as much distance as possible. But Seokjae had hunched down to stick close enough to rest his head on his shoulder, and as a result, Muyoung was now in a state no different from being crumpled up and buried in his embrace.

‘No, don’t think about it. This is just a big, giant puppy. Large dogs sometimes knock people down and smother them when they’re happy. The firmness is… right, it’s just from bulking up by eating a lot of chicken breast!’

Once he became aware of his body, Muyoung tightly closed his eyes and muttered rapidly to himself like a mantra, afraid he might be captivated by the sound of his heartbeat or his body scent as he had been until now.

‘Now hyung is my baby. My puppy. My silly puppy!’

Perhaps because he kept repeating it without giving room for other thoughts, the breathing sound in his ear seemed to sound like a dog’s sniffing.

“Hm? Muyoung.”

The urging voice when he was late to answer due to his solitary anguish could even be mistaken for whining for treats quickly if he tried hard enough.

‘Right, from now on, I’ll be a fan in a wholesome way. Wholesomely.’

It might be difficult to change suddenly just by yelling at himself not to get excited, but if he keeps brainwashing himself in his mind, there will surely be a meaningful change. Muyoung, who had been busy transforming Seokjae into a large dog in his mind, slowly continued what he was going to say.

“Yes. I won’t tell you not to worry about me.”

“Really?”

“In return, please let me worry about you too.”

Seokjae, who had been happy thinking he could now legally control him based on Muyoung’s permission, couldn’t help but have a strange expression at the following condition. It seemed that the worry Muyoung wanted to do meant not just words, but actions added to it, like himself.

“So, so we protect each other.”

As Seokjae’s expression turned unfavorable, Muyoung quickly opened his mouth before he could persuade or refute. If the reason for excluding him from dangerous situations was due to affection, no matter how hard he tried, the chance to step up would never come.

“I won’t complain about what you do out of worry for me. In return, you allow what I do too.”

As time passed, wouldn’t he try to exclude him even more? If so, he had no choice but to face it head-on and win. Muyoung smiled playfully on purpose to hide his tension.

“It’s okay to bet on who can protect more too.”

When he straightened his hunched body to look strong and reliable, fortunately, the huge body pressing down on him moved along.

Seokjae didn’t take his eyes off Muyoung until their waists were completely straightened, and as that time continued, Muyoung’s courage faltered and he mumbled, adding a condition.

“Of, of course, if it’s dangerous for everyone, I’ll naturally move after getting permission. Still, I have experience surviving alone. I might do things that seem dangerous… but I’ll survive till the end and come back, so please trust me. I won’t disappoint you.”

The increasingly long speech ended with self-promotion like a new employee at a job interview.

Seokjae’s tightly closed mouth moved exactly 5 seconds after Muyoung’s words ended.

“What’s the reward if you win?”

“Pardon?”

During the brief silence, Muyoung had been thinking that if he kept insisting on getting permission to move, he would just act and face the consequences later. It’s usually easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. But Seokjae brought up a third question that was none of what he had expected.

“Re, reward?”

When Muyoung asked back with round eyes and a seemingly dumbfounded face in surprise, Seokjae kindly added an explanation.

“You said it’s a bet. Shouldn’t there be a reward for the winner?”

“Th, that’s right. If it’s a bet, there should be a reward. So the reward is…”

Since he had mentioned the bet without any thought, just jokingly, he hadn’t prepared anything. Muyoung rolled his eyes around and decided to put up the most childish and common, but most fitting reward.

“How about… granting a wish?”