Elden Ring: Miquella's Consort

Alistair :"Femboys? Those are gay. I want all of them."

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"So how are we supposed to get to Caelid from this church again?" Miquella turned to Alistair as they washed their cutlery in the clean river behind the Third Church of Marika :"I was kinda half conscious that time you explained it."

"Oh, there's actually a teleporter hidden at the end of this river. If we take that, we'll go straight to the Bestial Sanctum at the northern edge of Caelid. From there, we'll make our way south to the surprise I've got for you."

At first, Miquella was curious about what the surprise was. But after nearly two weeks, he was kind of tired of not knowing what they were going to do :"Can't you just tell me at this point? The surprise element has kind of lost its taste."

"Hah, bullshit. I wanna see you say that again when you see what we're going for." Alistair scoffed with a grin :"Oh, by the way, kinda off topic, but do you know Maliketh, the Black Blade?"

"Of course I do. He's my uncle. Him being a giant wolf is sorta weird, but he was a good man back then. He was a kind uncle."

"Oh yeah? Well, that's good to hear. Also, he's inside of the Bestial Sanctum we'll land outside of."

"What?! Uncle Maliketh is in Caelid?!"

"Yeah. But he's hiding his identity behind the name Gurranq the Beast Clergyman. There, he seeks Deathroots and rewards those who bring him any."

"Deathroots?" Miquella sighed softly, saddened :"Those are the byproducts created after Godwyn's death and his transformation, right? So he seeks to get rid of them all, I assume?"

"That's right. He seems to have also been cursed with hungering for them. He eats all of the Deathroots brought to him, but is never sated. He thinks that it's because of his sin, bestowed by Queen Marika, for losing a part of the Rune of Death."

"I see... I didn't expect to see uncle Maliketh again. Is it alright if we pay him a visit when we get there? He may be willing to help us if he knows that I'm with you."

"Won't he be hostile instead? Since you're... you know, not alive?"

"Hahaha, I AM alive, Alistair. I'm not dead, just in a spiritual state, just like Melina. And as you know, I can also become a physical being with your help as well."

"Hmm, true. Let's hope Maliketh takes it that way too. Honestly, I hope he does. He was always my favorite legend boss."

"Hahaha, I'm glad to hear that. Although a little awkward, he's a good person. Or well, wolf. I hope he won't be hostile. By the way, when will we set off? I miss uncle Maliketh now that I know his whereabouts."

"Hmm... maybe tomorrow or the day after. We need to rest for a bit after the long trip and be completely prepared. We should store a lot of food and water, considering Caelid's "beautiful" condition. Hmm, I should go back to the Gatefront to see if they have taken over the camp again. If so, their rations will be really useful."

Miquella frowned between his explanation :"What's wrong with Caelid? You sound sarcastic describing that place."

"You don't know? Well, how should I put it? Remember Malenia and Radahn's battle? Where you sent her to fight him to trigger the start of your plan?"

"Yes...? Oh, don't tell me Malenia's scarlet rot..."

"Yeah, as a last resort, she took out your unalloyed gold needle and unleashed the scarlet rot. She bloomed and... Caelid got fucked into being a literal space canser case. Believe me, it's not a fun or tourist attraction place to go to."

Miquella sighed, rubbing his temples :"I see. Yes, I don't assume the place where the scarlet rot bloomed completely would be a pleasant place. So that's why we need to prepare completely before heading there."

"Yup. Among the mutated monstrosities that are supposed to be dogs and the aggressive ass, bitch ass crows there that basically choose violence on sight, we really, really have to be prepared before going there."

"Haaah, the situation is really bad there, huh?"

"So bad that you're probably underestimating it in your imagination."

"Then that place is going to be of concern after our ascension. Since it became like that because of Malenia and I, it's my responsibility to fix it."

"I don't even know if that is possible. But hey, we're talking about the time when I become max leveled and you become a god. So maybe what I'm considering as impossible will become a piece of cake later on. Who knows?"

"Hm, that's true. Only time will tell. Hmm... do you think uncle Maliketh will help us?"

"With fixing Caelid? How would he do that?"

"No no, not with fixing that place, but in helping us in our journey? Maybe I can talk him into accompanying us. Having the protection of the one who controls Destined Death will definitely be of great help."

"Hmm... that would definitely be amazing. I wish it'll happen, but I won't get my hopes up."

"True. That would be too good to happen. But I hope it'll work. Anyway, enough gloomy talk!" Setting the dishes he was washing aside, he clapped his hands suddenly. Causing the water on his hands to splash into his cute face and startle him, and for Alistair to break into a fit of laughter.

"H-hey, no need to laugh so hard!" He blushed, wiping his wet face with the tower next to him :"A-anyway, instead of being regretful or worried, we need to make use of that time to get ready.

First, we need food. Lots of it. So we do need to check the soldiers' camp back at the Gatefront. On top of that, we should also hunt some animals. From what you told me, whatever lives in Caelid now is definitely not edible, so the more food we have stored, the better.

We also need water. But fortunately, that won't be a problem since you can store water as it is and we have a huge river with drinkable water in front of us. Then all that's left is to prepare your equipment and we'll be good to go."

"Right. The Flask of Wondrous Physick and Crimson Crystal Tear will also be of great help. Especially the Sacred Tear that was thankfully here. Thank God that was here. Those things can increase how much health or FP the flasks can replenish, so they're very important. We need to find more of them. Along with more Golden Seeds. The flasks are extremely important for survival."

[Flask of Wondrous Physick

Crimson Crystal Tear

Sacred Tear]

Miquella smiled as they put aside all of the washed cutlery :"Alright, that should have been the end of them." Getting up, he stretched comfortably, arms stretching up to get rid of the ache. But in doing so, he frowned at his own smell :"Ugh, I smell really bad. I really need a bath."

"Days of traveling do that to you." Alistair frowned at his own smell :"Fortunately, we found a few soaps back at the camp. We can clean ourselves with those. Let's just put these away to dry, then we can take a bath together."

"T-together?" Miquella's face reddened, causing Alistair to smirk teasingly :"What, don't wanna take a bath with your future husband, dear Miquella? We're both guys, remember? What's there to be embarrassed about? Or are you just too shy, oh mightiest and most fearsome empyrean?"

"N-no! W-why would I be shy?!" She glared, annoyed at his teasing and mocking tone :"I j-just thought that some decency between us would be better, even if we're both guys. B-but if you want to b-bathe t-together, then s-so be it."

"Perfect~! Then let's strip and enter the water!" Alistair grinned cheerfully. Miquella's blush grew at how excited he was :"W-what about the dishes then? We need to put them in a nice place to dry."

"Oh, that's already done." He smiled. Miquella frowned, turning to see all of the cutlery gone and placed neatly some distance away from them. His eyes widened in shock :"Wha- how?! When?!"

"I did it instantly the moment you agreed to the bath." The noiret declared smugly :"I'm not risking you going back on your word. You got me way too hyped for that."

"S-seriously, no need to rush. I won't go back on my word. It's nothing serious anyway." He mumbled, but couldn't ignore the sense of pride and happiness. Knowing the consort he had chosen saw him not as a child, but a partner he could lust for, made him happier than he expected. He let a purse of his lips hide his small smile :'Who knew seeing your partner wanting you would make one so happy?'

"Perfect! Then let's get right to it!" He stripped in all but a moment. Taking everything off in a single motion, as if it was magic. Miquella's eyes widened at his naked, muscular form, his hands going to cover his eyes, but peeking through his fingers :"H-hey! I-I said i-it's alright, b-b-but have s-some decency at least!"

"Decency? In front of my chosen husband?!" He smiled friendly, completely unabashed despite being naked entirely :"If I can't be comfortable around you, then who can I be comfortable with? Make some sense, Miquella."

"Oh, so I'm the one with nonsense?!" Miquella glared, but didn't dare let his eyes travel lower "E-even if we are future spouses, we still aren't married yet! Y-you can't just strip in front of me!"

"Yeah, yeah. Tomato tomato. It's already decided, so we might as well take full advantage of it early on." Alistair rolled his eyes with a smile :"And again, we're both guys, remember? You literally have everything that I have, so what's there to be embarrassed about?"

"E-even if that logic makes sense, it doesn't mean it's right!" Miquella blushed :"Just because we're both guys doesn't mean our bodies are the same!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Come on, strip already. We need to take a bath." Alistair said so, but guided him in taking his clothes off instead. And by that, as in taking off his white tunic with the same speed he had taken off his own clothes. Instantly.

"Eep!" All Miquella felt was his tunic suddenly passing over his head and away from him :"H-h-hey, Alistair!" He quickly covered his exposed chest and underwear clad crotch while the noiret rolled up both of their clothes neatly and put them aside.

As he turned back, Miquella's blush only grew at the way his throat bobbed with his gulp. Shivering at the tilted toothy smile Alistair flashed at him :"Gotta admit, I like what I see. But I would love it even more if we took off one more thing."

Miquella gripped his underwear, afraid that the only thing hiding protecting his shame would suddenly disappear too :"Y-you... lecherous consort! You c-can't just act in such p-perverted way!"

"Perverted?" Alistair raised an amused eyebrow, stepping closer to tower over the golden femboy, who gulped at the size difference :"Miquella, my dear husband, my future god, my beloved consort, give me one good reason why me lusting after my own spouse is perverted? At least in a bad way, that is."

"I-I... w-well..." The blond femboy stuttered. The hungry look in his eyes left him petrified, and not in a bad way. He could feel his body starting to heat up, and a specific place was especially getting hotter, as Alistair stared into his very soul through his eyes.

He would have been weirded out, or even disgusted, if Alistair, someone he had only begun to know, checked out his body. At least that's what he tried to convince himself he would feel. But he wasn't checking his body. He wasn't lusting after his small frame. He was longing for him, Miquella himself.

Alistair's eyes didn't leave his own eyes, not even for a moment, and it was like he was under a spell, because he couldn't break their eye contact despite wanting to so much.