Dungeons Are Bad Business

The ghosthetic – which had earned the moniker Dogginald after some back and forth between the trio – was surprisingly adept at climbing stairs, and Vee mentally kicked himself for not making the ghost bigger. If he could ride on its back, his frequent nemesis would have been vanquished for good.

Alas.

The trio – or perhaps they were a quartet now – walked into the boarding house lobby and saw that there were a handful of well-dressed newcomers that none of them recognized loitering around. They had the look of adventurers: athletically built, defiant gazes, and a penchant for carrying weapons everywhere they went. One blond man, for example, stood up and slung his impractically sized sword up onto his shoulder just to get a drink of water.

Vee shook his head.

Another one of them, a woman wielding a trumpet – or perhaps a bugle or cornet – that had spikes on one end and a long flat strip of metal on the other, looked over at Vee and gestured to her companions.

“Reckon that’s them,” she said in a fittingly brassy voice. “Ogre out front said he’s a blue-obsessed shrimp who wears a coat that's almost the same color as his hair and walks around with an armorsoul. Probably not many of those around here.”

The group got up and walked over to Vee, who, like any reasonable person, felt a touch of trepidation at the prospect of being approached by several heavily armed individuals. It was tempered slightly by his temper, which was running a little hot on account of being called a ‘blue-obsessed shrimp’.

“Can I help you folks with something?” he said, perhaps a little sharper than he would have under more normal circumstances.

Takes-sword-to-get-water stepped forward and said, “You’re the [Dungeon Master] of Crestheart, right? We’re the Earlybirds, an [Bellwether] adventuring party who specializes in completing dungeons and sharing our experiences with them. We have thousands of fans across the continent.”

He stopped there, as if waiting for Vee to respond in some way, so Vee nodded and said, “That’s…nice?”

Thankfully, that acknowledgement was all that was required, because the man resumed his monologue right after.

“A few of our members are going to be competing in the upcoming circuit and we were wondering if we could maybe do a few quiet runs before things get started.”

Reginald frowned. “Why are you asking us? The dungeon is open for regular business. Go to the adventurer’s guild and schedule yourselves some runs.”

A different woman wearing plate armor stepped forward. “See, we were hoping to maybe do them off the record, before or after normal business hours. That’s why they’re called quiet runs. We have this sponsor, Final Unicorn, that hooks us up with gear” – she paused, turning to the side to show Vee’s group the blue unicorn logo on the back of her breastplate – “and they get angry with us if we don’t put on a good show.”

“That seems somewhat unreasonable of them,” Vee said.

The woman shrugged. “For better or worse a lot of die hard [Dungeon Sport Fans] blame equipment before adventurers. Anyways, by getting familiar with a dungeon before it officially starts, we can make sure that we don’t embarrass our sponsor.”

“I don’t know…that doesn’t sound particularly fair,” Alforde said. “We sell guides to Crestheart, and you can just buy those to get an idea of what you’re going to be facing.”

“Even the best guides have gaps in their coverage,” another one of the adventurers said. “Nothing compares to the experience of actually going through a dungeon and running it, you know?”

“I’m not comfortable with this,” Vee said. “Sorry.”

“But this is standard practice!” Swordguy said, looking agitated. “Dozens of dungeons are willing to give [Bellwethers] early access! If it’s a question of compensation, we’d be willing to pay double your usual floor fee.”

Now that was tempting – their reprieve from making their weekly payments wasn’t going to last forever –but Vee still didn’t think it would be right to let the adventurers come in under special circumstances. Besides, he didn’t want to have to go to the dungeon earlier than normal or stay late.

He shook his head. “I don’t think I can allow this.”

“What about triple fees? Quadruple? Please, we really need this!”

Vee felt a little bit like a man who’s recently sworn himself to a dedicated morning exercise regimen contemplating another hour and a half of sleep when his alarm clock goes off. He looked over at Reginald and Alforde for any sort of signal, but his friends weren’t much help. Alforde’s bright blue eyes were inscrutable, and Reginald’s position on the matter was obvious.

A tiny voice in the back of Vee’s mind piped up in his ongoing consideration, with a simple question that carried far greater weight than it should have.

What’s the harm?

On the one hand, it wouldn’t be terribly sportsmanlike to let some adventurers into the dungeon early and off the record. On the other hand, triple floor fees from all six [Bellwether] adventurers would really help bolster their coffers.

He didn’t doubt that other dungeons allowed so-called quiet runs– neither [Detect Falsehood] nor [Detect Lie] had proceed when the man had mentioned that fact – so why should he resist?

Did he have a greater obligation to the circuit, or to his own dungeon? He’d barely even spoken with the other [Dungeon Masters]! Surely he had a responsibility to take care of Crestheart first.

But was that right?

The [Dungeon Master] pondered that question for what felt like a long time, but was actually probably only half a minute or so.

After weighing the pros and cons of each option as best he could, Vee made a decision.

He wasn’t sure if it was the right one. That’s the nature of leadership, he told himself as he nodded and looked back at the adventurers.

“This is my only offer. Triple floor fees, no champion battles, and no more than two runs for each of you,” Vee said. “Oh, and of course, no refunds. Take it or leave it.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when Swordguy grabbed his hand and gave it a firm shake.

“Done. What time works best for you?”

“Probably early,” Vee said. “Come to the Westown gate tomorrow morning before we open, and I’ll let one or two of you do a run depending on how long you take.”

[The path forward isn’t always clear, and sometimes difficult decisions must be made after carefully weighing the available options.]

[You can now earn points in Pragmatism!]

[Pragmatism +1]

[Leadership +1]

Vee dismissed the notification and left, with Alforde and Reginald behind him.

Do and the other [Dungeon Maintainers] were waiting outside the dungeon when Vee arrived, looking extremely excited.

“Master, we have some things to show you,” the big fiend said. “Would you come with us?”

Since there was still some time before the day’s first runs were supposed to start, the [Dungeon Master] nodded and followed his orchestra members down the street. He noticed that several of the buildings looked emptier than they had when he’d last seen them, as if the fiends had been clearing them out.

Tons of little yellow and blue flowers were starting to bloom on either side of the street, and more than a few walls sported new ivy coverings that Vee was sure hadn’t been there before. Even though the street was as quiet as it’d ever been before, the [Dungeoin Master] couldn’t help but feel that it was more alive.

The Expectation tightened contentedly around his shoulders, and Vee was smiling when the fiends stopped in front of a big empty lot. Or, rather, what had once been a big, empty lot.

Now in its place was a series of obstacles that looked like some of the dungeon’s major rooms. There were platforms and catwalks, pits to jump over, and several wooden contraptions that were covered in short sticks.

“What is this?” Vee asked.

“Some time ago you mentioned that low level adventurers needed a place to practice,” Do said, its speech almost perfectly clear. “Loyal servants that we are, we have gone ahead and built one here by using some of the same ideas we use in Crestheart. The experience won’t be the same, but it should be useful for the lower level adventurers in the city to practice on. What do you think, master? Do you approve?”

Vee walked inside, running his hand over the individual pieces and marveling at how well they’d all been constructed.

He turned back to the fiends and beamed.

“I do. This is incredible,” he said. “It’s going to be wonderful once we get it up and running. Thank you all so much.”

“We live to serve,” Do said, bowing.

As cool as the training grounds were though, Vee wasn’t sure how to best utilize them just then. He didn’t have anyone to staff it, and was wary of the council’s oversight if he decided to try and start operating it anytime soon.

Reginald seemed to be thinking along the same lines, because he trotted Dogginald over to Vee and said, “Probably have to keep it quiet until after the circuit starts, boss.”

Vee nodded, though he hated the thought of leaving such an awesome place to gather dust.

“There are some logistical matters I have to figure out before we can start letting adventurers in,” he told Do, “but I am extremely grateful to you [Dungeon Maintainers] for your efforts. You’ll all receive a large bonus in the coming days. Now, in the meantime, I’m reminded of another matter that I’d like your assistance with. In addition to a place for low level adventurers to train, I’d also like us to eventually offer a place for spectator’s to come and watch dungeon runs while they’re in progress. An arena of sorts. Could you and your crew make that happen before the circuit starts?”

Do bowed again. “Of course, master. I know just the place, and we will get to work on it right away.”

Feeling rather accomplished already, Vee and his companions returned to the dungeon and started getting things ready for the day.

After pouring in the day’s dose of aqua magia, Vee turned to Reginald and said, “How’s the [Core Spirit] level restoration going?”

“Making steady progress,” the hat said. “I think there’ll be enough power in my core to let you bring some more of the dungeon’s traps online after today.”

“That’s good,” Vee said, sitting down at his desk and making sure that everything was primed for the day’s first challenger. He’d probably go ahead and reactivate the [Frost Vent] crystals, since he’d been torn between those and the [Ice Slope] traps.

Vee took out his notebook and waited for the day’s first challenger. Working on the ghosthetic had given him the confidence to go ahead and try his hand at some of the designs he’d worked up with Rortenferry, as well as a few others that he’d had since.

By the time he jotted down a few notes for the orders that his new creations would require, an [Axe Enthusiast] had cleared the first two rooms of Crestheart.

Adjusting his dials, Vee waited until the man stepped onto the proper tile, then went ahead and activated an [Ice Slope]. The floor collapsed, sending the adventurer down into a small nest filled with slimes. His run ended soon after.

“Ouch, that’s gotta hurt,” Reginald crowed through his magnifying crystal. “Do try again though sometime in the future!”

The hat turned and looked over at Vee, giving the [Dungeon Master] a big smile.

“It’s going to be a good day, boss.”

“Yeah,” Vee said as he responded in kind. “I get that feeling too.”

Main Character Sheets:

Vee Vales

Primary Class: Ghost Maestro (Locksmagister University), Level 32

Secondary Class: Dungeon Master (Oar’s Crest), Level 23

Tertiary Class: Guy-Who-Takes-Things-WAY-Too-Far (Self), Level 6

Might: 15

Wit: 37

Faith: 26

Adventurousness: 7

Ambition: 15

Plotting: 19

Charisma: 15

Devious Mind: 25

Leadership: 21 (+1)

Guts: 14

Intimidating Presence: 10

Citizenship: 23

Public Relations: 8

Determination: 4

Persuasiveness: 5

Bargaining: 3

Patience: 2

Competitive Spirit: 1

Pragmatism: 1 (+1)

<3<3 Infatuation <3<3

Alforde Armorsoul:

Primary Class: Hammer Specialist (Self), Level 5

Secondary Class: Right-hand man (Vee Vales), Level 17

Tertiary Class: Dungeon Champion (Oar’s Crest), Level 18

Additional Class: Glaciernaut (Sacha Silverblade), Level 10

Might: 56

Wit: 15

Faith: 28

Adventurousness (Bound – Vee Vales): 9

Endurance: 29

Intimidating Presence: 14

Heart of a Champion: 14 (+1)

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 9

Vigilance: 10 (+1)

Vanity: 2

Reginald:

Primary Class: Core Spirit (Unknown), Level ??

#$&Q#$)(@#$#@#$%!@#$##%#%()@#$**@@##

Secondary Class: Loudmouth (Self), Level 41

Tertiary Class: Majordomo (Vee Vales), Level 19

Additional Class: Announcer (Vee Vales), Level 11

Additional Class: Hyperthymesiac (Self), Level 5

Might: 1

Wit: 37

Faith: 17

Ambition: 28

Greed: 24

Deceptiveness: 27

Manipulativeness: 42

$#&*!@!!: !!!

Loyalty: 47

Patience: 10

Irritability: 23

Remorsefulness: 17

Expository Prowess: 23

#%$Pragmatism*#$: @#61$5

Hop@#!! @#$@!@#

@#$@%%^

#4^5#*&_!+++#(@$#

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 9