When Immortal Ascension Fails Time Travel to Try Again

At this point, I could come out with the truth. Admit that I lied to protect myself. My old friend, if he were in a good mood, might forgive me.

But we weren’t alone here. There were sect Elders and Peak Masters. Some of them were decent people... for people living in this fucked up world. But a few of them were assholes I didn’t know if I could trust.

This was also, frankly, my chance.

I’d spent so much time in this world wishing Immortal Zhenren Sword Within the Light of Virtue was my master instead of Fairy Verdant Bamboo that it might as well be part of my Dao. Or a demon in my heart.

If I came out with the truth, there would be no way my friend would allow me to worship him as my master… considering the danger.

Also, I knew some secrets of the sect. One of which was about contacting immortals... No Sect Leader would ever initiate contact with an ascended member of the sect.

To do so would result in their death. And — at this point in time — the way to contact an immortal without dying had yet to be rediscovered.

But I knew how.

The process wasn’t entirely without danger. And it had a lot of requirements. But I could — possibly — survive it.

I straightened my spine and told a truth. “Immortal Zhenren is a very busy person.”

The Sect Leader eyed me skeptically. “I would contact him myself, but even I wouldn’t dare reach out to an immortal. So the fact that he spoke to you in your dreams seems rather... Fortunate.”

I smiled. “He hasn’t spoken to me often, either.”

“Then, can you tell us something only he would know to prove yourself?”

It was exactly like my old friend to ask such a trap of a question.

“Rather than something specific, I’d like to lecture everyone here on Immortal Zhenren’s wonderful forays into Logical Alchemy and the study of unusual components that he taught me. For example, his work on systematic pill formulas and the benefits that come with using those as opposed to the traditional method of keeping some ingredients hidden and leaving the recipes out of order.”

I continued my familiar lecture. In the room, every eye glazed over reminding me that there was a reason Immortal Zhenren never took in a disciple. Well, whatever.

Every time I spouted this particular lecture, it reminded my old friend of my fake master... Or he was just reminded of being tortured by the various lectures his martial uncle forced him to listen to.

Eventually, the Sect Leader’s eyebrow twitched. “Fairy Lin, Stop! Stop! That’s fine. It’s obvious that you’re a student of my Martial Uncle.”

After I shut my mouth, he sighed deeply.

I stopped myself from smiling.

The room grew quiet for a long moment.

“Now that your status as Immortal Zhenren’s students is confirmed, we should move on to the next issue.” He looked at all the elders in the room, possibly communicating silently with them. “We wanted to inform you that my nephew is going into seclusion at Razor Falls, to reflect and cultivate.”

I stilled. That was the sect’s very nice prison for those who did wrong but had good enough connections that they could live fairly well. It was better treatment than he deserved, but I also knew that my friend wouldn’t have the heart to put his nephew to death since he was his last blood relative. Plus, he was one of the more brilliant diviners in the sect.

“He won’t bother you or my disciple again.” The look he gave me was calm and serious.

This, right here, was why I respected this man.

As Glittering Iron’s powerful uncle, he could have let him off with a warning and treated this as little kids play-fighting. He didn’t. Instead, he gave him a harsh punishment worthy of his crime.

It wasn't as harsh as it could have been, but, not actually succeeding in his attempt likely helped the asshole get a lighter sentence.

Anger flashed in Little Spring’s eyes. It seemed like he wanted to say something. On our way to the sect, he learned about everything that happened while he wasn’t there.

The kid… was not happy that I put myself in danger like that. But I was in a high realm (in my past life), damn it. I could handle situations like that! (Even at my current cultivation.)

“Since my nephew is not in a position to bother you or my disciple again, I believe that it’s unnecessary to mention the circumstances of his long-term closed door cultivation. To anyone.”

Well. Good thing I could read between the lines.

Little Spring’s hands clenched into fists and he opened his mouth. Usually, I would trust this kid when it came to talking to people… but not right now. This was my sect. My territory. I may not deal with strangers as well as him, but these people, I knew.

I moved my hand in front of his face, shocking him into silence, then I bowed. “We understand, Sect Leader.”

Also, the people we were dealing with right now were goddamn cultivators in the Nascent Soul and Immortal Bone Creation realms. They could crush us like bugs and not give a damn… because that was the type of Xianxia we were in.

Fortunately, most of these assholes weren’t that immoral. Probably because the author created them at the beginning of his story — back when it was fairly innocent and almost classic in style.

The sect leader cleared his throat. “We’re also here because we need to address you and your brother’s wish to join the sect.”

I nodded while trying to keep the excitement that I felt deep inside out of my expression.

“By rights, for your protection, I should deny your request...”

I narrowed my eyes at that.

“Your cultivations are low, and my nephew has many friends who are not happy about his circumstances, even though he brought it on himself.” He was basically saying that if we joined, then we’d have to watch out for a knife in the back. Of course, not joining didn’t mean we’d be safe either.

“... Since you are my Martial Uncle’s unofficial disciples, I’m giving you a chance to prove that you’re fated to enter the sect. One. Single. Chance.”

My friend stroked his beard. “This sect has rules set by our founders. One of them is about entering the sect — to enter, one must first pass a series of appropriate tests.

“While I appreciate your effort in helping my disciple, the sect cannot, in good conscience, go against that precedent. The sect trials for new disciples are also happening soon. And so, it was decided that there is no reason to set up an alternate test in advance just for the two of you.”

Fuck!

While every disciple who wasn’t born in the sect was first tested before they entered, that didn’t mean that they all had to go through the difficult sect trials. I’d been there during a few instances when several cultivators from a large clan joined the sect. I even helped set up the fairly simple tests. Of course, the difficulty may have been lowered due to a very large donation of spirit stones and earthly treasures.

Not to mention that this meant I’d have to wait around a year and a couple months for the damn trial! I did not want to wait that long!

Every minute I was out of the sect, was a minute I had to earn spirit stones all by myself to cultivate. It was a minute that I had to rely entirely on my own power to protect a trouble attracting Main Character.

Of course, I knew this wasn’t just the Sect Leader’s doing. Glittering Asshole was a man who grew up in the sect. Most of the sect elders likely thought of him as their nephew as well. Even if the Sect Leader wanted to help us, he had to take their opinions into account.

This didn’t mean that I couldn’t make things awkward for them all.

For revenge.

I nodded. “Understandable. Completely understandable. I’m sure, that even those young masters from the great clans will also go through the sect trials.”

A few of the sect leaders refused to meet my eyes.

As I suspected.

“You all are not bullying me because I’m young and you think I won’t know any better, are you?”

The sect leader frowned down at me.

One of the Elders spouted, “Do you expect us to give you the same treatment as a member of one of the Great Clans?”

I sighed. “I may not contribute spirit stones and earthly treasures but I bring something far more valuable. Knowledge. Given to me by my teacher. It is worth a hundred times any amount of spirit stones they can give you. I am shocked that you all don’t realize that.”

One or two faces in the crowd turned pale. But — by the look on their faces — most stubbornly refused to admit that they were wrong. That was to be expected. One did not reach for immortality or even enter this sect if their will was weak.

Stubborn young fools, the lot of them.

I smiled. “If you set up a trial for a member of a Great Clan, why can’t we just join in?”

An old sect elder I didn’t remember glared at me. “Out of the question!”

Most people in the room appeared to agree with him. “Fine. If you want us to take on the challenge of these sect trials — and bully children who can barely cultivate — then I don’t mind bullying some little kids. But those members of the great clans need to pass the sect trials, as well. Or else, even if I enter the sect, I’ll never share my knowledge.”

“Fine,” the Sect Leader said. “We can do that.”

“But Sect Leader!” another of the Elders said. I recognized him. He came from the Zhang Clan and entered the sect to gain better opportunities.

“Quiet! If we’re asking an immortal’s student to go through the trials, then it’s only right that we ask the same of the Great Clan members.” He peered at me with calculating eyes. “You’re correct. At your realm, and with your training, you would decimate any other child. That is why we have created these tokens.”

He threw out two necklace-like spiritual tools that had the crest of the sect embedded into the token. I caught one and Little Spring snagged the other.

“You must put them on before you enter the gates of the trial. These will temporarily force your cultivation base down to the second layer of Qi Condensation. Of course, if you’re in mortal danger, the tokens will break. But if they do, then you will forfeit the chance to join this sect.”

I eye’d him. “And what if we experience mortal danger from a test giver who gets angry at us? What about danger from an outside source that was not part of the sect trials?”

“Of course you won't have to forfeit... but you will have to prove that it was from an outside force.”

I considered the possibility of one of these fools sending someone into the trials to purposefully block my entry. Or several someones. Especially after I made enemies of all the Great Clans tossing their unruly kids into the sect.

Hmm. Perhaps, this wouldn’t be as boring as I thought it would be. It would be like a game of cat and mouse, only both animals had to lug around a backpack that more than halved their original strength.

Little Spring finally couldn’t take it and spoke up, “Sect Leader! Those members of the Great Clans, will they also have to wear one of these?”

“Yes. Though theirs will be slightly different.”

Likely, to make it up to the Great Clans, they’ll give them less of a handicap. That was fine. I didn’t want to bully them too much. Besides, there was something fun about a little guy punching up… That concept was the essence of all cultivation novels.

And I could use this time to train Little Spring and help him build a solid foundation (when it came to fighting).

“Considering that even with this handicap I could crush any prospective disciple, this sounds fine.”

The elders in the sect looked very uncomfortable. They probably realized that they knew nothing about me aside from who taught me.

Those who were once part of the Zhang Clan glared at me.

Just then Fairy Verdant Bamboo stepped forward, dressed in her classic green robes. This one had bamboo patterns lining her sleeves. The hem floated as she walked as if she were some ethereal being. Her green-black hair framed a cold yet beautiful face, one that hadn’t changed since I last saw her 1000 years in the future. She looked down at me with unfeeling eyes. Her lips curled into a malicious smirk.

This was my past life’s master. One of Bloodsword’s wives. Peak Master of one of the largest peaks in the Indomitable Will Sect.

“Do you really believe you can defeat a member of one of the Great Clans in the trials?”

“Of course.”

She gently snorted. “Who knew that even the student of an immortal could have eyes but not see Mount Tai.”

I chuckled.

Before I could respond, Little Spring stepped forward. “If my sister says she can do it, then she can do it.”

Fairy Verdant Bamboo glanced at the kid and her expression gentled.

I stepped in front of him... Of course, then he stepped back in front of me.

Seriously, kid?

Fairy Bamboo’s lips twitched, “Oh? Then are you willing to make a wager?”

Everyone in the room quieted down.

Curious, I threw out, “What are the terms?”

“Either you or your sister gain first place in the trial, or you’ll both leave the sect and never return.”

I crossed my arms and grinned up at her. “You’re essentially asking us to give up on ever officially recognizing Immortal Zhenren as our master. Isn’t that a bit petty? Frankly, I would only accept a wager like this if you swore to give me every single thing your master left you, aside from the position of Peak Master and your immortal cave.”

Her eyes wavered. “Nonsense!”

“Exactly. What loving disciple would ever agree to a nonsense wager like that?”

Her eyes darted to someone in the crowd I didn’t recognize, then hardened. “Fine. I accept those terms.”

I blinked. Did she really, actually accept this dumb wager? Seriously?

I glanced at Little Spring who stared at Verdant Bamboo with clear determined eyes. Well, she had several items I needed. One she didn’t even know the worth of right now.

This was also a chance to slap some faces and prove to everyone here how fuckin’ badass I was.

“Fine. But you and your friends are not allowed to interfere in the trials.”

She snorted. “Of course. Just who do you think I am?”

A bitch with morals so low that she actually married her own goddamn disciple. That was supposed to be like a mother/son relationship! If she could do that, then she could do anything! Especially to someone, she assumed was a dumb little girl only at the peak of Qi Condensation.

I mean, of course, Bloodsword married his beautiful, fairy-like master. He was the gross main character of a dumbass harem story. But the fact that I couldn't easily go near him because she flirted with him from day one made me think her morals were real fuckin’ low in the first place.

“And if they interfere, you’ll agree to automatically forfeit the bet?”

She scoffed but nodded.

“Then it’s agreed, with everyone here as witnesses,” I said, grinning up at her like a dumb kid.

She sneered. “Of course. I’m the master of Mystical Bamboo Peak. If I agree to a wager like this and don’t fulfill my end of the terms, then I’d be willing to step down.”

I smiled. “Of course, if I lose due to outside interference and don’t get proper compensation, I’ll take my master’s advice, travel to the next continent, and join a certain sect over there.”

The sect leader coughed. Some of the older Sect Elders who knew about our sect’s long-standing rivalry with that fellow righteous sect had their eyes bulge. Several of them realized that if I lost, it would help their adversaries. This would ensure someone took notice and helped make things fair.

It might also tempt someone to assassinate us, but I’d deal with that if it happened.

“Unyielding. Make sure Little Fairy Lin and Little Spring here make it to the Indomitable City safely.”

He bowed. “Yes, master!”

He glanced at us. From my years of working with him, I noticed a glimmer of respect flash in his eyes before he continued wearing his facial paralysis mask. “The sect trials will take place in two months. Make sure you’re outside the gates! The last thing I want is those Golden Dragon Sect bastards to get their hands on Immortal Zhenren’s student.”

I smiled and bowed. Then it hit me... Did he say, two months? Two? Two?!

Were my calculations wrong? Did I get here a year later than I thought? No. Definitely not. Then, in my last life, they must have postponed it by a year because everyone was mourning the loss of the Junior Sect Leader.

Wait. This also meant that I had less time to train Little Spring than I thought!