Wait For Me

I spent a good deal of time in the bath in the early days, covering the basics of pushing and pulling. It was an easy way to practice magic without having to put my life in danger. Something Ikae made sure wasn’t going to happen.

“You’re not gonna toss me in a lake or something and hope for the best?”

He looked amused. “I’m not in the business of putting my trainees in harm’s way before they can handle it. Enri would kill me on the king’s orders and just because she spent a lot of time and energy getting you here. Speaking of.” He dug through the desk drawer for a moment before pulling out a vial of greenish-blue liquid. “This is for you. From Enri.”

“Any idea what it is?”

“Certainly not something that will kill you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“I don’t think Enri would do something so obvious. Oh, wait! I know what this is.” I threw it back, wincing at the bitter taste. For a brief second, it felt like my brain had been scrambled by a hard hit but cleared quickly. Looking around the classroom, I saw some of the writing Enri had abandoned on the board. Like reading English, I knew what it said.

“For every action you take using magic, there will be an equal reaction to your physical body. The more powerful the magic, the more resilient your body must be.” I looked back at Ikae, who looked confused. “I know reading from the board isn’t impressive, but I couldn’t read the language before now.”

“Seriously? How have you been getting on without it?”

“Luck, and Enri was nice enough to manage her lessons without me having to read anything.”

“I’m sure it must have driven Iljana mad.”

“Yeah, but that was the fun part.”

He shook his head. I couldn’t tell if Ikae didn’t like Iljana, or just thought it was funny how easily I could push his buttons. Probably both. “Have you been practicing with your cups?”

Without much effort, I moved water from one cup to the other. From there, I split it into three cups, then six, and brought it back to the initial cup. I did it all without making so much as a splash.

He nodded, pushing back in his chair. “Good. I think we can move on to bigger things.”

A carriage ride later through the mage and infantry school grounds (it was faster than going through the center of town as the wall separating from the shopping district detracted from distractions), we approached a lake on the outskirts of town. I could see the wall from the shore, soldiers standing at attention atop the parapet.

“So, we are going to a lake.”

“Yes, but not to hurt you. In battle, you’ll be of most use if you can control large amounts of water with the skill and accuracy you displayed with the small amount of water.” He gestured to the lake in front of us. “We’ll practice here from not now, understanding the basics on a larger scale.”

“So, those big basins aren’t just for show.”

His dimples deepened as he smiled. “No. Get moving. We’ll need to head back before the sun sets.”

I took a breath, looking at the vastness of the lake. I hadn’t grown up near water, being from a small town in bumfuck Texas, but I’d always liked it when Claire, Enrique, and I would go to the ocean. Viktor always sat these trips out because he didn’t trust the water. I didn’t understand what he meant at the time, but I was starting to get that feeling. The more I worked with it, the more I realized how much power it had. It moved at its own pace and if you weren’t careful, you’d be swept away with very little chance of recovery.

In the bath, it was easy to get a grip in the flow of water since it was mostly stationary, only moving when I did. In a large body like this, there were more things I had to worry about. There were fish, currents, a breeze, the temperature, and a dozen other things. Simply pushing and pulling was taking more out of me than anything else.

It felt like I was trying to move each individual muscle the same way I would normally just walk. Everything was a battle against the way the lake wanted to move, though I managed to get it in rhythm with what I wanted. It took most of the day, but I was pulling it high and pushing it low.

I collapsed on the ground, drenched in sweat and breathing hard. Terra magic required stubbornness because it was so solid and stationary. Water magic required patience and endurance to understand what you were trying to move.

Ikae walked over, handing me a small, wrapped box and some water. “Here. You need to eat.”

“I may throw up if—” I coughed, rolling onto my side. “I need to catch my breath.”

“Be quick. Your food will get cold.”

“Thanks for the encouragement.” It took a moment, but I managed to sit up and picked up the box. It smelled a lot better than what I had been eating for the past month and a half. When I opened it, a small note was sitting on top. I recognized it as Enri’s handwriting. “How nice, she sent me a note. ‘Keep up the hard work. I’m rooting for you.’ Aw, she’s thinking about me. Holy shit!” In the box was a beautifully crafted meal, straight from the king’s kitchen. I wanted to start crying right then, but even the water Ikae gave me wouldn’t be enough to make sure I wasn’t dehydrated after.

I put the note back in the box and scarfed down my food. It was even more delicious than the first time. I rested on my back again, staring at the clear sky. A few wispy clouds were floating through, but the bright blue was unparalleled.

A small breeze traveled through, ruffling my shirt and I was immediately reminded of my first night away from home.

I had snuck up to the roof of my dorm (by completely legal means) and brought a blanket to watch the stars. A breeze was coming through, and it smelled like the McDonald’s on campus. In my hometown, I could see a lot of stars, but on that roof, they were few and far between. I remembered being disappointed, but weirdly relieved. It was so different.

Laying on the beach by the lake, I had the same feeling. I was glad to be somewhere new, even if I desperately wanted to go back home.

With a clap, I stood and stretched, ready to tackle the lake again. I just needed to think about it from a different angle. Less force, more flow.

I could do that.

As the day progressed and I steadied into a routine, I realized barely two weeks later that it would easily be interrupted.

My time with Ikae was cut short when Vanli and Sanyr’s companies were called for a meeting.

The twenty of us had no idea why we’d been called but sat almost quietly as we waited. I’d come to recognize most of the people there, those in my own company better. Besides Corek, Eumen (a well-built, but slender looking woman with a mohawk who exuded surety) and Clecia (a short, sweet face mute girl with a neck scar I was surprised to know was sixteen) were probably the nicest. They made sure I always had someone to help when Vanli had enough and Corek was busy.

Everyone else treated me as other or were just disappointed that I wasn’t what they thought I was going to be. I didn’t blame them for that. I wasn’t going to step in and end the war with my presence and they knew that, but it didn’t stop them from wanting someone who was at least well-trained. I was getting there, but it was a process.

Vanli and Sanyr marched in, the murmuring coming to an instant halt as they reached the front of the room, looking grim.

“Today we’ve brought you here to inform you all that you’ll be having supplemental field training. From what I’ve witnessed, my and Sanyr’s companies are excelling and would benefit the most from this.” She motioned behind her to a map. “The town of Sandbreak, about a week’s ride west of here, needs help being evacuated. Word has come back that the fighting will take this town with it if it doesn’t end soon. Most people have already started leaving and the only people left are the sick, disabled, elderly, and any able-bodied family that stayed with them. We can’t take that risk. At daybreak tomorrow, I expect everyone to be ready to move out.

“This right here is a map of the town and the evacuation routes we’ll be taking. Memorize what you see. We won’t have time to pull it out in the middle of evacuation. If we’re lucky, we won’t have to worry about protecting the people. We are hardly ever lucky. Take however long you need to memorize it and say your prayers before sunrise. Dismissed.”

A heavy silence fell over the hall as everyone stared at the map. We would be split into different teams, I was sure, but we still needed to see everything. The problem was, my brain was essentially a sieve. I had never been able to memorize anything, even when it was important.

I stared, trying to learn every road and house, every nook and cranny. I was the last one to leave the hall, jittery and anxious.

Sleep didn’t come easily as I held onto my necklace, tracing the pattern well into the night before exhaustion took me.

In the morning, I lined up with my company, my pack full of essentials and clothes. Corek stood next to me, and Eumen stood behind me. Clecia was tragically out of sight. Vanli stood to the side while Sanyr got the carriages ready. I couldn’t read her expression, but as she squinted at us, I knew we were going to see some combat. She had been nice enough to warn us that we weren’t lucky. Thankfully, I never expected to be.

When the carriage checks were done, all ten of them, Vanli and Sanyr took two horses to watch the front while Corek and Droma took the horses to pull up the rear. People I had only seen in passing were on the horses pulling the carriages. I could see the temple from where we were, and I wished I had the faith to rely on a higher power. Maybe then I would feel better about our excursion.

The guards paid us no mind as they lifted the heavy gate and for the first time, and hopefully not the last, I left the walls of Yvanta’s capital.

The ride was tense. Most everyone didn’t have active combat experience and, from what I could tell, were drafted. Unlike Earth, most people were aware of the horrors of war and while they would serve and be honored, they were still scared.

I held my bag close, staring at the floor and steadying my breathing. With the jostling of the carriage, the weight of Eumen’s arm against mine, and the warm sun filtering through the canvas, I started to drift.

I dreamed of Enrique this time. He sat next to me in the empty carriage, my head on his shoulder. “How do you think this is going to go?”

I sighed. “I’m not sure. Well enough, I guess. Just enough that I won’t die.”

“You’re pretty strong now, bud. I think you’ll be just fine. You’ve grown a lot. Even Enri thinks you’re doing great.”

“How would you know that? You’ve never met her.”

He laughed. “I can guess from the way you think about her. You even memorized the map in time. The route will come to you.”

“Unless I panic and forget everything.”

“You won’t.”

“I’ll never understand how you’re so sure about everything.”

“Because I know you. I’ve known you for a long time now. And I know you’ll always come through when we need it. You need to wake up, though. It’s time.”

I awoke to a hard stop, almost falling out of my seat. The light on the carriage was dimming with the setting sun and the murmuring was starting again. The doors were thrown open and we stood, filing out and standing at attention.

We were in a clearing off the side of the road, big enough for our troops. Vanli stood in front of us, hands behind her back. “We break here tonight. Eumen, Kaiya. You two take first watch and check the area. Everyone else, take care of the horses and carriages before eating.”

Everyone broke out into groups to take care of their duties and Eumen and I started walking the perimeter. Under different circumstances I might have been grateful for the opportunity to walk the woods. They were beautiful, leaves full of every color and the grass lush and green. Animals scurried around, climbing trees and birds were perched on branches, looking at us cautiously. The moonlight filtering through the leaves left a dancing pattern on the ground I could have stared at all night.

“Are you paying attention?”

“Hm? Yea, you were saying we have to make sure we’re safe from animals and whatnot.”

She sighed. “How are you so nonchalant about this? You’ve never seen a moment of combat, yet you’re relaxed enough to zone out.”

I reeled back, almost tripping over a snake. “What are you talking about? I’m sure you can’t hear it, but my heart has not slowed down since I woke up this morning. I’ve got more anxiety in my pinky than you have in your entire body.”

“If you weren’t zoning out, what were you doing?”

“Listening. I’ve spent the night in the forest before without any supplies and I can tell just by listening there aren’t any animals we have to worry about right now.”

“That’s right. Madam Iljana left you out there for training.”

I rolled my eyes. “Training is putting it nicely. I’m sure he was hoping I got maimed or something.”

“I’ve never been beyond the walls before, so this is weird.”

“Your family’s from the capital, right?”

“Kind of. They settled here while the kingdom was still forming thirty years ago. By the time I was born, the wall had been up for over a decade, and I’d never known anything else. I always wanted to, but I never had the chance until now.”

We came towards a break in the trees, and I could see small, flashing lights. I raised my arm up, holding my finger out, and a firefly landed.

Eumen marveled at the scene, mouth open and eyes wide with wonder. “How did you know they would do that? I’ve never seen these before.”

“These are fireflies, and I used to catch them with my sister when I was a kid. They’re friendly little bugs that will land on you even if you don’t hold out your hand.”

With a hesitancy unbefitting, she held out her hand and after a few seconds, a firefly ran into her fingers before righting itself and landing on her palm. She looked like she wanted to run away and get closer at the same time. She looked at me, grinning. “They’re kind of dumb, aren’t they?”

“It’s part of their charm.”

We started walking again, Eumen reaching out to any that would come close, and they would land gently, flashing a silent code we would never understand. “Do you think we’re all going to make it back?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Well, Madam Vanli seems to think we’ll see combat and even though we’re a head above everyone else, casualties happen. Do you think we’ll all make it back?”

I was quiet for a minute, thinking over the question. Realistically not everyone would make it back if we saw combat. There were a few people here that were terrified and would likely freeze rather than fight or even flee. Our job was to get civilians out as unscathed as possible and that just might mean our lives would go instead.

“I think everyone will make it back. I’m going to choose to believe that.”

We circled back around to the camp before Eumen spoke again. “I’m glad there’s at least one person here who has hope.”

“I refuse to believe in the actual limitations of the world. Being a bit delusional is healthy sometimes.”

She laughed. “Sure, man. Whatever works for you.”

We reported back to Vanli. “All clear, Madam,” Eumen said.

“Good. Take a minute to eat and start your patrol again. In three hours wake up Sonra and Soulta to take your places. Dismissed.” She turned back around to confer with Sanyr.

The next few days were more of the same. We travelled by day, camping by night. I was sure it was to make sure the horses would still be in good enough condition to haul ass when we got to the refugees. There wouldn’t be a lot of people to take with us, but that didn’t mean we wouldn’t come across more people who needed help.

We arrived shortly after daybreak, a little over a week after leaving, and lined up as we usually did when the carriages stopped. This time with tensions just as high as the first day.

The town was a few yards away and seemed to be empty, but after a glance around, I noticed people were in their houses, peeking out of windows at us. The air was heavy with the pressure of our combined anxiety as we listened to the battle off in the distance. I couldn’t tell how far, but from the sound, it was too close for comfort.

Vanli stood in front and began to speak. “We’ll be breaking off into pairs, and I’ll tell you which route you’ll be taking. Keep your eyes and ears up. Protect these people with your lives. Licai and Goca, route one.” They sprinted off straight ahead, not waiting for other instructions. They already knew what to do. “Slas and Mava, route two. Lagos and Tooslav, route three. Corek and Dorla, route four. Clecia and Kaiya, route five.”

We took off west, working our way around the outskirts. While it wasn’t huge, there was still a lot of ground to cover. We paced ourselves, counting the houses and streets until we stopped, turning into the opening of a main road. From there we split, taking each side.

The first door I knocked on was met with silence. I knew from the swish of the curtain that someone was inside. After the next knock was met with more silence, I yelled, “My name is Kaiya from the capital city of Yvanta. We’ve come to help evacuate this town. If you or someone in there is not able-bodied enough to move, let me know now. Otherwise, grab your essentials and head to the town’s main entrance. There will be transportation waiting for you.”

I moved to the next door, and this one started to open before I could knock. She was a small woman, a heavy pack on her back. Next to her was a young man clutching his bag. Both were wide-eyed, looking left and right as they opened the door.

“Word was sent days ago that we’d have to evacuate,” she said. “We weren’t sure if anyone would come.”

“Get to the main entrance. There are carriages waiting.”

“Thank you, soldier. Thank you.” With his arm around his mother, they hustled away.

We continued making our way down streets and avenues, people starting to stream out of the homes on their own, flagging us down if those with them couldn’t move freely.

I hustled through the town with a little boy on my back, his father trailing behind with their things. I kept my eyes open and ears alert. The sun was now high above, and I wanted to make this as short a trip as possible. The town, while it had been evacuated by able-bodied citizens, people whose homes were affected had taken refuge here and there were more people than anticipated.

With the carriages in sight, I slowed and set the boy down. His father came huffing after me, wheezing out a thank you as I took off again. Our route was nearly clear, but I needed to make a second round.

Clecia passed me on my way back and signed, “Last round?”

Being with her almost every day had been a good way for me to pick up on sign language. “Yes. Reporting back?”

“Yes. Good luck.” She took off, and I wandered back through. Most houses were empty save for a few of the able-bodied family members gathering the rest of the essentials. A little girl waved me off, saying she needed to get her mother’s extra cane. “The other one broke on the way. She has a few more here. I’ll be okay.”

“Scream if you need anything.”

Further into the town, I could hear a choking sound. At first, I thought a toddler was left behind. Instead, I found a woman with a man leaning heavily on her. She looked exhausted, heavy bags under her eyes, and I could see a baby strapped to her back and a little boy clinging to her side. Silent tears were running races down his cheeks.

“Excuse me?”

Her head jerked up and when her eyes landed on the emblem of my leather armor, she looked immediately relieved. “My husband. Can you please help us?”

“I told you to just leave me, Lenris,” he grunted. “Take Kejesi and Nicia and go.”

“I’m not leaving you behind,” she snapped. She turned back to me. “I gave birth not long ago and I can’t carry him like I used to. We’ve been out of his pain medication since the doctor took off.”

“I see.” He looked like he would rather lie down and die than go anywhere. Beads of sweat peppered his forehead and nose. “Make your way to the carriages. I’ll take care of your husband.”

“Bless you, soldier. May Mastet guide your way.” She shifted his weight to me, and I picked him up in a fireman’s carry. His dead weight was heavy, but I’d be damned if I didn’t get him out to his wife and kids.