Vell Harlan and the Doomsday Dorms

THIS DAY (AGAIN):

“What’s up, you gaggle of fucking weirdos! Is that a new kid I see?”

Harley took a deep breath and waited for Dominic and Naomi to take their seats. She had carefully arranged the chairs at the table to put as much space between her and Dominic as possible, but they didn’t take the hint. Both scooted their chairs around the table and sidled up uncomfortably close. Luckily Harley had adopted Vell as a buffer.

“Look at you guys,” Naomi said. “You saved us some seats, so I take it this is the second go around?”

“Spot on,” Lee said.

“Great, so we’ll actually remember the new guy,” Dominic said. “But first, I got to ask: On the first loop, did we finally get -”

“No! Actually, we didn’t, that didn’t happen,” Harley said. She wanted her excuse to not sleep with Dominic to be slightly less ballistic this time. “And this is actually a good time to make introductions because Vell here is the reason we couldn’t.”

“We’re dating,” Vell said. Harley had, of course, gotten his permission for this con. Both as a courtesy and as a preparation. Vell was barely selling the act now, with hours to prepare, and would’ve floundered instantly if surprised.

“Really? You’re dating him?” Dominic said, giving Vell a critical eye. “No offense. Just the idea of Harley seriously dating anyone, much less, well...you…”

Dominic then gestured to Vell in a way that didn’t really mean anything, but still came across as offensive.

“I was surprised too, you know, but sometimes love really sneaks up on you,” Harley said. She grabbed Vell by the arm and clung to it tightly. “He’s a real sweetheart, you’d understand if you got to know him.”

“Which you may not,” Lee said. “I should warn you, on the first loop your superiors were quite upset about your recruitment numbers.”

As the second part of their elaborate lie, Lee had gotten in touch with her company connections and found out about the quotas for this recruitment event. Naomi and Dominic were not hard working people by nature, not anymore at least, but they always made sure to meet the exact bare minimum expectations, for the sake of their paychecks. Lee expounded on the details of the quota’s and pointed out several imagined failings the duo had made on the first loop. The two of them had several very real failings, but Lee did not bother telling them about how they’d eaten five pizzas each and then gotten arrested by security bots for trying to have sex on the beach. They would’ve found that funny, if anything.

“Shit. That seems like a lot of work,” Naomi said. “Are you guys going to be able to stop the apocalypse without us?”

“We should be fine,” Lee said. “The marine biology department-”

“Those fuckers.” Dominic interjected.

“Those fuckers indeed,” Lee said with a nod. “They summoned Bahamut, the world eating fish-”

“Wild. What’d it do?”

Lee stared at Dominic for a second.

“It ate the world,” Lee said. “And was a fish.”

“Neat,” Domini said, pointlessly. “How are you going to stop it without us, though?”

“Lee bought a very big net,” Harley said. “We got this.”

“We could probably scrape together our quota and still have some time to help out. Or at least get to know the noodley-looking guy,” Naomi said.

“That’s what you said last time,” Lee corrected.

“Shit. Really?”

“Yes. Also: ‘Noodley-looking’?” Harley said. “That’s my boyfriend you’re talking about.”

The dating was fake, but the offense was real. Nobody called Vell “noodley-looking” around Harley, no matter how noodley-looking he actually was.

“Right, slender, whatever,” Naomi said. “Dominic, go get started.”

Naomi shoved Dominic out of his seat, much to Harley’s relief, and then stood as well.

“And what’re you going to be doing?” Dominic demanded.

“Looking for Leanne,” Naomi said. She glared at the empty space around the table where Leanne might have sat. She also stared at the very sudden, very panicked reactions of the other loopers.

“That...may not be a good idea,” Lee said.

“Why?” Naomi said. “Is she still doing that dumbass silent treatment thing?”

“Yeah, she’s still pretty quiet,” Harley said.

“I can’t believe that bitch,” Naomi said. “Is she still not over it?”

“No, she isn’t,” Vell said. “Whatever ‘it’ is.”

“Well she better get over it in the next ten minutes, because I’m going to find her,” Naomi said. She stormed off before anyone could raise any protest.

“Should we follow her?” Vell said. “And like, stop her?”

“I don’t think Leanne would like us getting involved,” Lee said. “If she wanted our support in dealing with this, she would’ve let us know.”

Vell’s desire to help Leanne and his desire to mind his own business started to butt heads, and Vell, being Vell, decided to reach a compromise.

“I think maybe I should keep an eye on Naomi, either way,” Vell said. “From a distance. She seems like she causes problems.”

“Spot on analysis, captain,” Harley said. “Get to it.”

Vell saluted and then trotted off in the same direction as Naomi, hoping to catch up to her before he completely lost her trail.

Elijah scraped some of the turf off his cleats. One would think that after putting all the effort into building a giant, levitating spherical field, the school would invest in some quality astroturf, but apparently not. He picked a last bit of fake grass out of his shoe and started to put it back on.

“Elijah!”

The shoe fell out of Elijah’s hands as he recoiled. That voice never ended well. He grabbed the shoe back off the ground and tried to play it cool as Naomi approached.

“How you been, bud?”

“Decent,” Elijah said. “Things have been a little quieter since you left.”

“Figures, always knew this place would get boring without me,” Naomi said. She took a seat next to Elijah, sitting practically shoulder to shoulder with him. “So, how are you and Leanne doing?”

“Decent. Good. Figuring out what happens after we graduate.”

“It’s coming up quick,” Naomi said. “You two going to get a place together?”

“That’s...not the plan, no.”

Not Leanne’s plan at least. Elijah had been trying to persuade her otherwise for a while.

“Oh, so I take it you haven’t-” Naomi paused mid-sentence to make a suggestive gesture “-yet either?”

“No!”

“Why not?”

“You know what Leanne’s like,” Elijah said.

“Yeah, but come on, you’re a young stud in his prime,” Naomi said, pressing herself a little closer to Elijah. “You should be getting some action. You just have to ask her the right way.”

Naomi leaned even closer and whispered in his ear.

“Or ask someone else.”

Further attempts at seduction were interrupted by the decidedly un-seductive sound of a rubber ball bouncing off of a skull. Naomi narrowly avoided being knocked off the bench by the impact of the ball and made a quick recovery. Only one person she knew could throw that hard.

“Hey Leanne.”

The rubber ball bounced past Leanne’s feet after rebounding back towards her. She resisted the urge to pick it up and lob it at Naomi again. Instead, she jabbed a finger in a random direction away from Elijah.

“Still doing the silent treatment, I see. Are you ever going to get over that?”

Leanne stopped pointing and swapped fingers briefly to flip the bird to Naomi, then went right back to pointing away.

“Oh, mind your own business,” Naomi said. She put an arm around Elijah’s shoulder. “I can catch up with an old friend if I want to.”

The expression of intimacy only angered Leanne, and she walked up to physically remove the arm from her boyfriends shoulder. Naomi allowed her arm to be dragged away, but only so she could stand to face Leanne. She kept an ironclad grip on her former friend and the two stared daggers at one another.

“You know, if you would actually fucking talk, I might listen.”

Leanne refused to even change the expression on her face. She pointed, once again, to the side, away from herself and Elijah.

“I don’t speak your bullshit mime language, you’re going to have to talk to me,” Naomi mocked.

“Come on, Leanne,” Elijah said. He didn’t get near the two, partially out of fear, but he did try to interject himself into their debate. “It’s been years. Can’t you two talk this out?”

“Talking it out would require talking, so apparently not,” Naomi said. Leanne squeezed her arm a bit tighter and shoved her away.

“What is this even about, Leanne?” Elijah asked. “You still haven’t even told me why you’re so mad at her.”

Still unwilling to even speak around Naomi, Leanne gestured to her offending former friend, then pointed to herself, and made a stabbing motion towards her own heart. Elijah stared at her blankly for a second.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I don’t speak mime!”

Leanne scratched her head. She had forgotten she wasn’t actually all that good at gesturing, she just hung out with a lot of people who were coincidentally very good at charades. Seeking a way to speak without being heard by Naomi, Leanne moved closer and tried to whisper the answer in Elijah’s ear, but he stepped away from her when she tried.

“What is wrong with you? You’re constantly talking about how weird and insane everyone in that ‘club’ of yours acts, but what is this? You won’t even talk normally with her around?”

Elijah pointed to Naomi, who gave a little wave. Leanne glared at her for a moment, and the moment she looked away, Naomi locked eyes with Elijah and continued the game of charades. She made the same suggestive gesture and then pointed at herself with a wink. Unlike Leanne’s charades, Elijah understood the meaning very clearly. Elijah tried to avoid going too red in the face and glanced back at Leanne, then back at Naomi, then back at Leanne. He saw two paths ahead of him, and he made a choice.

Vell was bad at acting casual under the best circumstances, and these were not the best circumstances. Even while deliberately keeping his distance from Leanne’s personal business, he could hear shouts and arguing from around the corner. He couldn’t hear any details from a distance, but the anger in the various voices could not be missed. He started to get especially concerned after Leanne’s voice joined the fray, and shortly thereafter he became outright terrified when everything went silent.

After waiting a minute to check it out, Vell walked stood up and immediately sat down to wait another minute. He counted to sixty, then got up and walked towards the scene of the argument, making it halfway there before he turned around and sat back down. The third time proved to be the charm, as Vell made it all the way to the corner and poked his head around.

Knowing Leanne and what she was capable of, Vell expected a crater or two. Maybe a broken wall, or a broken bone. Naomi certainly seemed like she deserved a good sock in the jaw. Vell braced himself for the worst and rounded the corner.

Instead of some scene of angered carnage, Vell just saw Leanne, slumped against a wall, curled into a ball with her head resting on her knees. For all her usual imposing strength and stature, Leanne suddenly looked very small.

With none of his earlier hesitance, Vell walked right over to Leanne and sat down a short distance away.

“Are you alright, Leanne?”

“Go away.”

“Alright,” Vell said, as he immediately stood to leave. “You know where to find me if you need anything. I, uh, hope you feel better.”

“Vell.”

In spite of what she’d said, Leanne had sort of been expecting Vell to insist on sticking around, giving her time to yell at him. She had some things she needed to get out of her system.

“Just stay away,” Leanne said. “You, and Harley, and Lee, just...stay away. I’m done.”

“Uh...What?”

“Just leave me alone,” Leanne said. She clutched at her head, and Vell could see for the first time how red in the face she was. She’d been crying recently. “All you people and this stupid time bullshit has ever done is ruin my life.”

Vell looked down at the despondent Leanne, then looked around awkwardly.

“I, uh, I’m sorry,” Vell said. He could tell now was not the time to try and debate this point. “Goodbye, I guess, and again, you know where to find me-”

“Leave, Vell.”

“Leaving.”

Beneath Leanne’s sadness, there was still a very tangible current of anger, and Vell had no desire to press his luck. He promptly skedaddled, leaving Leanne to her own devices. He would’ve liked to know exactly what had happened, but he had no way of knowing for now. If he was lucky, he might find out later.

Exactly five seconds later, to be exact. Vell’s path back to the dining hall took him past the Senior dorms, allowing him to catch Elijah in the act of walking Naomi back to his dorm, with her arm wrapped all too tight around his waist.

“Seriously?” Vell mumbled under his breath. “He couldn’t even wait ten minutes?”

Vell ducked back around the corner and sighed. He had a sinking feeling this was going to become a whole thing he had to deal with.

NEXT TIME ON DOOMSDAY DORMS:

IT’S A WHOLE THING HE HAS TO DEAL WITH