Tunnel Rat

The more Milo learned about Mako and the rules for his upcoming match, the more he saw the cage as a trap. He was playing by Scavenger Rules, and he hadn't read the rulebook. Was there even a rulebook? Probably, but written in four dialects of dwarvish with a different version in each clan.

No potions and no spells meant no healing during the match. But he still had his regeneration, and nothing had been said about casting spells before the match. Was that an oversight? Or was it something the dwarven Scavengers didn't think about since so few of them were spellcasters? He shelved the thought until later. Not enough information and he had other things to think about.

He knew he was faster than Mako and more agile. She moved as if she expected anything else in the world to move out of her way and he'd seen her fight with the group of players. She could take blows and hit hard. He didn't relish taking a thrust to his chest the way she'd finished off one of the players. Dodging and blocking were essential, and waiting for a chance to hit back when she couldn't hit him back. It was much like fighting Larry, or even Charlotte after her change. As scary as Charlotte had been to fight, he hadn't been in such an enclosed space, and he could use his spells.

As he was pondering this, Bleusnout and Brutus came to talk to him. Brutus wasted no time in giving him the bad news, "I've been talking with people. This person you were so silly to get into a fight with is a bad one. The only reason your Engineer buddies haven't grabbed you and gotten you out of here is that they think too highly of you and are sure you had this all planned out. She's known to be tough as hell and she fought for most of her early life as a gladiator. Don't give her a chance, cause she sure as hell won't give you one."

"I had some of it planned out, maybe. But not a duel in a cage. Who thinks up stuff like this?"

Brutus thought for a moment, "Hmmm, dwarves, goblins, orcs are all found of them. Ogres too, but they get to eat the loser. And humans will copy off everyone else. Do you have some clever plan to beat her?"

Milo shrugged, "How I always fight. Try not to get hit, run around a lot, and hit back when I can. It's easier in a war, more options.

Bleusnout handed him a small bag. "So we thought. Treat this like a war. Your opponent will have advantages you don't even know about, so accept this small bag of medicinal cheese. You look a little pale and I'm proscribing it to you. It isn't a potion. It's cheese."

Milo looks at the four pieces of Battle Cheese. They smelled delicious. But..."That's a lot of cheese, and I've had cheese recently while playing cards."

Bleusnout patted him on the shoulder, "You're cautious, that's good. But I think you'll need these. Take the aged Goulda at the start of the match to give you speed and dull pain. The other three will provide healing, kickstart your regeneration, and stop any bleeding. If you need to use them, don't hesitate. Fighting and injuries will force your body to use up its reserves of cheese and keep you in the safe zone."

Milo looked at the two of them. "Thanks, I appreciate it. I think I'd better get ready."

"Indeed. The crowd is restless. And we will be there with you. I've been told that you may have two associates 'In your corner.' Brutus and I have volunteered."

Ten minutes later, Professor Tallsqueak walked down the stairs, dressed for a fight. His heavy robe had been exchanged for a shorter hooded shirt with a face covering. Mako, on the other hand, had stripped down to comfortable pants, heavy boots, and a sleeveless leather shirt that showed off her collection of tattoos on her muscled arms. She raised her arms and cheered for the crowd. Tallsqueak walked to where Captain Cuda was waiting. Mako sneered and came over.

"Ready for your beating, Professor?"

"Certainly, Captain, but first, I have a rules clarification. You mentioned 'no beard pulling'. I have to ask, does it say anywhere in those rules that 'tail pulling' is allowed? It is an equally terrible offense."

Captain Cuda scratched her head, "No, I don't think the rules mention tails."

The Professor smiled, "Then, if nowhere in your extensive rulebook does it allow tail pulling, then we must conclude that both tails and beards are off limits."

Mako was trying to work through the statement, "Now, wait a minute...."

Captain Cuda held up a hand. "I agree with the Professor. Nothing says you can, and since he doesn't have a beard and you don't have a tail, that seems fair."

Mako pretended not to care, "Whatever, I was planning on cutting it off for a trophy, not pulling it. But that can wait until after I pound you into the ground."

Cuda looked at the two of them, "Ready to fight then?"

Mako gasped in mock surprise, "Without a blessing from the gods? Sacrilege!"

Captain Cuda looked at Milo, then at Mako, "Make it quick, Mako." A member of the audience came forward and cast a spell on Mako, making her skin glow briefly.

"Sorry, Professor, something else you may not have been told about. Blessings became traditional in season 307. Have a cleric or someone handy for a blessing?"

The Professor shook his head, "No. But this seems like a violation of the rules against spellcasting."

"Well, the prohibition is against casting once the two of you are in the cage. There's no way to keep people from getting buffed up ahead of time, but by allowing a blessing it keeps things under control."

"I see. So many new rules to learn."

Mako returned to a spot across from Milo. "Yeah, lots of rules, and all your fancy learning isn't going to help you here."

The Professor rolled his eyes. "Math is always helpful. For instance, I can tell from the way you walk that your hamstring muscles are shorter than 85% of the dwarves I have met, giving you limited flexibility. Coupled with the injury to your left Achilles tendon gives you a slight limp, I've estimated your charge speed to be 29% beneath the average optimal speed. You have a good sword length of 23" but your arms are comparable to a miniature T-Rex. You will need to use 87% more stamina when sprinting to catch me, while I will enjoy a 72% savings in energy. Finally, mathematics has taught me that a negative modifier applied to a spell description can be further modified by who it is cast upon, possibly generating a further negative modifier that cancels the first. Do you disagree?"

Captain Cuda was counting on her fingers to figure out what the Professor was saying but gave up. Mako spit to the side and sneered. "I don't care one way or another. Let's get this fight going."

"Agreed, and best of luck to you in this friendly athletic bout." The professor stuck out his hand to shake.

Mako grabbed his hand, squeezing hard, causing Tallsqueak's eyes to water and he bit his lip from the pain until Cuda slapped them apart. "Save it for the cage, Mako."

The two fighters went to their respective corners where small doors let them enter. The crowd could barely see the Professor between the two hulking ratkin there to assist him. Milo put the first two pieces of Battle Cheese in his mouth, feeling the cheese enter his system and his reflexes sped up. Or was it the world slowing down? He bounced up and down on his toes anxious for the fight to start.

Mako entered the ring, pulled out her cutlass, and glared at him. Captain Cuda yelled, "Begin!" Somewhere, a bell was rung.

As expected, Mako sprinted across the cage at Tallsqueak. She hadn't understood all the things he'd said but knew when someone was insulting her stubby legs. She expected a Furious Charge and Extended Lunge to catch the Professor off balance, but her thrust found empty air as she slammed into the cage. Tallsqueak knew Mako couldn't resist the taunt and had prepared his dodge, faking left, rolling right, and coming up again as Mako moved past him. He threw a double slash across her back and was flipping backward immediately in case she spun around.

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As he stood up on the opposite side of the cage, he saw Mako's back, totally unhurt, just before she slowly turned around. "My, did someone try to stab me in the back? It felt like a mosquito tried to bite me. Welcome to the big leagues, Professor. Even without a Blessing of Tough Hide, I don't think you'd have hurt me. Are you ready to beg for my forgiveness yet? Save yourself some lumps?"

Tallsqueak said nothing, thinking. If Mako had this much armor, it must be from Enhancement Points and Toughness. With the blessing added to what she had, it was no wonder she didn't lose fights and didn't bother to dodge. She was a walking tank! This meant a change in his plans, and he pulled Shadowblight from his belt. It was harder to roll and dodge with the spikey stick in his hand, but he needed to soften Mako up. And keep her angry.

When her opponent didn't answer, Mako charged at him again. This time, as he dodged aside, he pivoted and put Shadowblight into her back, triggering the Sundering effect. His weapon, seeing an opportunity to inflict pain, added Venom to the attack. Mako's armor dropped by 50 points, and she began taking 100 points a round in poison damage.

Mako felt something inside of her break, and she felt the poison as her health began ticking down. "You sneaky rat-bastard! You brought a poisoned weapon to a cage match?"

Captain Cuda yelled at her, "It so, it was up to you to check his weapon before the match started. That's the rule, Mako."

Mako shrugged. It was an annoyance, and she was barely scratched. The poison was taking off some of her health, but to someone with over 15,000 health, a measly hundred here or there didn't matter. She was more concerned about how the hell he'd knocked down her mitigation. With Mitigation6, Hard-headed, Ironhide, and 44 Toughness she was up to 500 points of physical mitigation. Enough to make most opponents surrender when they found out that they couldn't hurt her in a duel without scoring a critical hit or using a special skill. Now she was down by fifty and the blessing was only good for thirty points. She could feel something in her shoulder snag and grind as she moved now, a reminder of where she'd been hit. The solution was simple: Press him hard, get in a few hits, and drop the Professor fast.

Tallsqueak saw that Mako was more wary now. Her charges weren't all out, more of a dogged pursuit. He was spending a lot of time running from her, bouncing off the walls, and staying ahead of her. He managed to tag Mako twice more, a hit with Shadowblight to the knee that made her curse, and a slash on her arm that left red scratches and nothing more. Round and round they went, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Cuda pick up the hammer for the little bell next to the hourglass. With only a few seconds left he charged Mako from the front, surprising her and bringing down Shadowblight onto her shoulder in a two-handed swing. Mako cursed and grabbed him by the throat with one hand, gleefully bringing up her cutlass.

With a loud 'Ding' the round ended. Milo looked at the Scavenger Captain and grinned, "How fortuitous, I lived through the first round."

Captain Cuda yelled at Mako, "Drop him and get to your corner, both fighters have one minute. No spells, no potions, and nothing enters the ring other than refreshments."

Milo sat on the small stool Brutus put out, and caught his breath. "You're right, she's tough. I'm going to have to work hard to hurt her. I'm burning stamina running around. She's not even sweating."

Brutus grinned, "But she's not walking so good. You hurt her some and she's green around the gills."

"Oh, I poisoned her three times with Noble Spider Venom from my spikey stick."

Bleusnout was staring hard at Mako, "Her wounds are healing! What did they hand to her?" He yelled to Captain Cuda, "I protest, Mako is using a healing potion!"

Cuda snarled and grabbed the bottle of whiskey from Makko, who didn't seem concerned, then handed it back. "All legal, refreshments need to be at least 70% of what's on the label by volume. A little 'pick-me-up' is legal in the rules. It still counts as whiskey."

The Chef scowled, "I don't like these rules, but who am I to accuse anyone of cheating? Here, eat this cheese!"

Milo took the piece of aged Limburger and popped it into his mouth. It tasted like heaven and he saw his stamina going back up." The bell rang and the next round started with a bang. Literally.

Brutus and Bleusnout dove for cover and Milo leaped for the ceiling as Mak threw a grenade into his corner. His leap saved him, but he was bleeding in three places. He held on to the top of the cage but Mako had another bomb of some sort coming his way. He dropped into its path and swung his weapon at it, returning it to Mako. The bomb blew up in her face and Milo took more damage, closer than he had been to the first bomb.

And he was close to Mako. He swung hard for the knee he'd hit before, putting a spike into her. Shadowblight was out of poison for the day, but Sundering was limited only by his stamina, and with the Limburger coursing through his veins he felt like running a marathon. Mako screamed in pain and brought her cutlass around in a horizontal arc aiming for Milo's head. He blocked with his other arm, taking the blow on his armored forearm. The armor cracked, sending a lance of pain up his arm and he was knocked away into the side of the cage.

Mako nailed him in his unarmored stomach with a hard kick and brought her cutlass up, only to be smacked by a hard tail slap to the face that cracked like a whip. Her nose broke and she took a step back, Milo rolled and put some distance between them.

"Fething tails! Shouldn't be legal to have an extra limb."

Cuda disagreed, "Neither the Lizard tribes nor the Kobold clans would hold matches if we excluded tails. Ratkin should fall into the same category. Rules are Rules."

Mako was shocked that she had taken damage. Granted, the hit caught her right in the face and she hadn't dodged. She snuck a look at her stats and saw her blessing had faded and she was down to only 300 mitigation. The Professor was cheating somehow, or using a cursed weapon. She felt broken inside, especially her face and left knee. It was time to play dirty.

Brutus yelled out, "Hey, bombs are legal? I want a ruling."

Captain Cuda shrugged, "Bombs are legal as long as they don't use cataclysmite. And they have to be carried on a belt or in a storage ring. Can't expect a Captain to not have a few extra bombs lying around. It's all good clean fun."

The short respite ended for Milo as Makko pointed her sword at him and yelled, "Fire in the hole!" A jet of flames seared the air between them, and he only half dodged, taking hundreds of points of fire damage. Milo rolled across the floor, then did nothing but dodge as Mako aimed two more Bolts of Flame at him. As the sword sputtered and went out, the round ended. Milo crawled to the corner where Brutus dumped water on his smoldering fur and Bleusnout handed him another piece of cheese.

The referee anticipated Brutus as he stood up, "All legal. That's an enchanted weapon with a Pyromancer Rune. Not a spell, just a triggered rune with limited charges."

Brutus started to say more, but The Professor held up a hand. "That's fine, just good clean fun. Hit that bell."