This S.O.B. System

Asher soon rejoined Joan and the others. There was much rejoicing. When they caught up a little they had to stop the fanfare and soon took lead once more. Abby was supposedly the strongest in the raid group so she took point with Arnold, the Predator guy. Arnold scouted, and Abby took the brunt if anything came up. 

 

They fought many unique monsters, from goblins to golems. Working together it only took an hour until they were passed the maze and in a giant dome room. In the room were 2 large doors. Torches lined the dome walls. 

 

“So which way?” Someone in the back asked. Ash thought it was the Wick System guy. In a suit that was unmarred he wondered if it was armored. He had a pistol on each hip, and a big gun on his back that Asher couldn’t identify. He supposedly had an arsenal in his storage gear. All in all the guy was pretty badass. He hoped there would be a chance to talk to him later. 

 

“Split up?” Abby offered. 

 

“We don’t split up,” the entire Hawk group said as one. This caused a few glances from the others. 

 

Asher studied the room, and noticed there was something off about it. On either side of him there were torches, then exits, then in the center nothing. Except for 2 torches spaced apart. His earlier trial still fresh in his mind he whispered, “There is no right answer.” 

 

Taking one of the torches in hand he grabbed it. Made of wood it was attached to the wall by a metal gold arm. Wiggling it down, the torch arm moved a hair. That wasn’t normal, there appeared to be no joints. “Tiffany, grab the other one,” he said pointing to the torch a dozen feet away. She ran over and complied. “On 3. 1-2-3,” he said and they both pulled down. The torch arms moved down with them, then a click sounded as the wall between them slid up. 

 

“How’d you know?” Tiffany asked as she ran over to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. 

 

“I think this administrator has a theme,” he admitted. “Besides, I’ve played too many games not to guess.” 

 

With that they began walking down the long dark hall. Arnold had gone ahead, but when he never randomly apparated they just walked. It took about an hour to finally make it through the long dark hall. A loud booming sounded as they drew closer. When they were finally through Asher saw Penny to the side and Raul straight ahead. He was pounding on a large door, the booms were his fistfalls upon it. He screamed and raged at it menacingly. 

 

As they stepped into the large dome room they were met with a prompt. 

Congratulations

You have made it to the final test of the Trial of the Crusader

In this trial there can only be one victor.

Conditions of Test

Defend the final room from all onslaughts for 3 hours

Current Test Time

1:22:14

Current Challengers in Room

22/22

Accept

Y/N

 

“Dismiss it for now,” Wayne whispered. But with that Raul stopped his attack. Turning around to face the group he stared angrily at them. Apparently he had super hearing. “Take positions,” Wayne said in a panic. 

“Guys!” Penny yelled, surprised. Near the door and Raul she began to step away from it slowly. Though a little disheveled she looked to be in one piece. 

 

“We came for you Penny,” Tiffany said. They began to fan out. Making 3 groups they stood in a line facing Raul.

“Guess there are more challengers,” Raul said. He was a shorter man with thin muscles, and a dark mess of hair on his head. Asher really couldn’t picture him as Superman. But at least he recognized the psycho, so he wasn’t wearing his glasses. 

 

They stood there for a little while, just staring at one another. Abby gripped her Kryptonite dagger. Some people readjusted grips on weapons. Asher could see Joan shifting beside him. Then without notice the Predator appeared behind Raul. His jagged blades sliced down toward Raul, but they struck his skin and stayed there. No movement whatsoever. 

They stood there like statues for a split second, then the fight began. The Predator disappeared again, but Raul grabbed him, causing him to reappear. He threw him at the group. McKenzie grabbed his limp body with her gravity and set him down. 

 

“Hey numbnuts,” Abby yelled. “Let’s dance.” From her hand came a bright blue light. Thrown at Raul the Ki blast splashed into him but dissipated. Asher had seen this a few times now, but usually there was more reaction than that. 

 

Raul, angry now, flew at her. She didn’t hesitate and took him head on. They were soon a blur of blows as they punched one another. Abby had forgotten the dagger at her waist in all the excitement. It wasn’t until she took a few blows too many that she remembered. Pulling it out she thrust it at him, but Raul caught her hand. The blade inches from him he flinched back. His other arm went to his stomach like he was in pain.

 

“Kryptonite? It’s real?” He asked as he stepped back. Abby, a little winded, took deep breaths with the blade in front to ward him off if he got close. 

 

“Give up Raul, you can still turn yourself in,” Wayne said. 

 

But the man was having none of it. His face distorted in anger. Then his eyes began to glow red. He fired off a laser at Abby’s hand. Her blade dropping, Batman swooped in and took it. Raul didn’t bother getting close anymore. He began to fire lasers at all of them. They soon dodged down or jumped out of the way from the beams. A few caught people, they grunted in pain, but it was quickly stopped as healers cast spells. 

 

“Mages,” Wayne said. McKenzie and Joan stepped up with another mage from the other group. Soon fireballs, invisible gravity attacks, and blue arcane blasts shot at Raul. Abby jumped in with her Ki blasts, a few caught him, but he was able to get some distance. Then Scarlet jumped down toward him. In her skintight black Gantz suit it’s veins bulged as she descended down on him with her thin black blade. 

The blade hit his arm but bounced off. Raul blocked it with his hands until she stabbed him in the eye. The blade barely nicked it, but it was enough to blind him in it. He moved to attack her, but she jumped 20’ feet back like it was nothing. Her red hair flying, she didn’t stay in one place long. Raul flew to attack her but then the bullets began to fly. The suited up Wick-guy started using his large rifle. The loud booms echoed in the chamber. They didn’t pierce his skin, but they did appear to hurt as Raul grunted and yelled. With a deep lungful Superman blew a blue breath at them. 

A cold icy wind billowed out of his lips. One of the mages cast a large firewall stopping the wind from reaching them. At that point Asher tried to snap out of it. Angry at himself he thought, Quinten would have jumped in. He needed to do better, but all he could do was nerd out at the awesome fight. 

 

Pulling out his Guts’ sword it was a little heavier and thicker than when he got it. So many hours fighting with it, it felt right in his hand. Slowly he began to walk toward the fight. Abby, Scarlett, and the Wick guy took turns attacking Raul. None made any headway, but this was turning into a fight of attrition. 

 

“Enough,” Raul said, rising up into the air. Amanda and Tiffany were the only other people that could fly, but they were smart enough not to attack the Superman. “I’m doing this for you!” He yelled angrily at Penny. She had been slowly making her way around the room to the group, but stopped when he called her out. 

“I never asked you to you sick fuck,” she said. “You killed Lloyd, for nothing. You need help.” She yelled angrily. Tears in her eyes. Asher walked towards her, his eyes on Superman. 

 

Raul floated there for a moment, and soon he began to shake. His anger rising further he looked to the group, then Penny, and with another scream he dove at her. His fist straight out like Superman, he dived. Asher knew what was coming though. Before the psycho could move too far ahead he let out his Battleshout. Grug’s roar focused on Raul it snapped him out of his rage. Then casting Intimidation Raul changed his target to Asher. 

 

With a thought he began to cast Justice for the first time. Mana poured into his blade, it caused the cool metal to glow white. His mana bottomed out almost instantly and with a roar Asher swung it up hard and then down harder on Raul just before he was punched. The blade, bathed in white, sunk into his shoulder just a few inches. The first mark on the opponent Asher kept pushing until the sword forced him to the ground. 

 

Raul was stunned for a moment. Sword in his shoulder, hands and arms holding him up. In that moment the green blade held by invisible hands stabbed down into his back. Raul screamed with pain from the penetration. Slicing through him like butter it pierced all the way through his chest and lung. Then the Superman passed out from the pain and weakness caused by Kryptonite. 

 

Everyone stood staring down at the defeated foe. Out of breath the only sound for a moment were deep inhalations of air. Then as Raul didn’t move, people began cheering. Penny crying her eyes out she ran to the group. Tiffany hugged her for all she was worth. The Predator walked over and patted Ash’s arm. A shiver ran through his body involuntarily. Too many movies still made him scared of the outfit. 

 

“Good job, kid,” Arnold said in a robotic voice. 

Asher nodded as he willed his sword away. He felt great. He was able to fight without using Quinten’s ruthlessness. And for once he won. Of course if the Predator hadn’t showed up he wasn’t sure what would have happened, but he had knocked the man down with his new ability, and he felt good. 

 

Soon Wayne had Raul in green cuffs. George was reluctant to heal the villain, but soon relented. Raul’s arms behind his back the Incubus System guy cast a spell on him to put him to sleep indefinitely. Then heals were thrown around, people sat in chairs and ate. The victory was long and hard, so it was time to relax for a minute. 

 

“What now?” Batman asked. Asher thought about it, he brought up the screen again. 

 

Congratulations

You have made it to the final test of the Trial of the Crusader

In this trial there can only be one victor.

Conditions of Test

Defend the final room from all onslaughts for 3 hours

Current Test Time

0:53:12

Current Challengers in Room

22/22

Accept

Y/N

 

“Do we give up?” Amanda asked. “I’m assuming you have to be the last one alive at the end of the timer. Or maybe the last in the room?” 

 

Asher knew the answer after thinking about it and the other tests he. “What is this, a one trick pony?” He whispered. Standing up he said, “Everyone click N.”

 

“Are you sure?” Tiffany asked as she moved up beside him. Penny had calmed down enough to be left alone. 

“Yeah. Its another fucking test. Trust me,” he said. He clicked ‘N’ then reluctantly everyone else did. Wayne was the last to click the invisible button, then nothing happened. Asher kept waiting for something, but nothing came. Angry he yelled, “Lethelle, stop this bullshit. We aren’t playing your game. We won’t fight each other to pass the trial!” His words echoed in the room for a moment. When they died down the groan of the door opening sounded. 

 

“Nice,” Batman said standing up. Others cheered as they stowed chairs and other items. As a group they walked toward the opened door. One of the warriors from the other team dragged a limp Raul. 

 

When they were all in the white room Lethelle appeared. In his purple robes he looked imposing in his green skin. A couple of people cursed, some stepped back, but Asher stepped forward. “We passed your test,” he said confidently. 

 

“No, you didn’t,” Lethelle said. “There can really only be 1 owner of the dungeon,” he said. Looking down at him angrily. “This trial is that of the Crusader. Someone that embarks on a journey and sees it through. If you don’t have the conviction to finish the quest, then you did not pass.” 

Tired and hungry Ash let out a sigh. “Well is there any way we can just share it?” He asked. 

Lethelle was quiet for some time. Then slowly he answered, “There is. Ownership could be given to a guild.”

“Okay, how do we do that then?” Asher asked. “I don’t see why we wouldn’t mind joining a guild.” 

 

With that a contract appeared in front of Asher. It was a Guild Creation Contract. “With this you could form one. It’s rare to do so before the &*$&(#(#, but not unheard of. First you would need a guild name. Then a guild leader. And then everyone would have to sign the contract. Terms of the contract would be set by the leader.”

 

In the end they went through another hour of bureaucratic nonsense. Wayne Tyler of course was voted Guild Master. Terms were simple. Don’t attack one another. Grievances had to be brought to the Guild Master. Loot rules would now have to be formally signed off on for groups. Notice had to be given when someone quit the guild. And the guild received 1% automatically from all Sysco rewards. The lowest it would go, there were no big qualms about it. 

What took the longest was deciding the name. Thousand Oaks had been a close winner, but in the end they agreed upon Community. A dumb guild name in Asher’s eyes, he voted for Wonder Kittens, but decided not to say that. Once that was done they all signed the contract and their guild was formed, the space that was empty before on their screens was now filled. 

 

“Well done Community Guild. You have passed the Trial of the Crusaders. Your rewards will be given to you when you exit the dungeon,” Lethelle said pointing to a black portal behind him. And with that, the green man disappeared. 

 

Stuck in there for over 12 hours they were more than happy to leave. When they walked through the black portal they were silent as they read their notifications. 

 

Congratulations

You have been passed the Trial of the Crusaders

Rewards will now be granted.

 

Rewards:
Dungeon	x1 (shared)
Title	x1
XP Points	x 5,000
Syscos	x 500

Crusader Title

You have completed the Trial of the Crusaders. Since the beginning of the System this trial has been used to help challengers prove their conviction.

Rewards

5+ stats

 

Surprised by the title, Asher brought up his screen. He could pick either one from a dropdown menu. He chose Lawful Good, it was the harder one to get. And from the reward he got from the Crusader title, he guessed it was 3 times harder. But he still got his free level worth of stats. 

 

RED QUEST COMPLETE

Assist in the subjugation

of Raul Luis.

Time Limit: N/A

Quest Rewards:

Experience Points

Syscos

Random Gear

 

ATTENTION DUE TO THE PRESENCE

OF A STAR SYSTEM REWARDS WILL BE INCREASED

Calculating...

Rewards:
System Coins	x 1,000
Experience	x 10,000
Gear	x 1 Spatial Ring

 

Damn, Asher thought with a smile. 

 

Black Ice Storage Ring
Cost	Quest Reward
Capacity	250 cubic feet
Enchants	Time Freeze

 

A slow whistle escaped his lips as a white light shined in front of him. His hand sticking out the black ring appeared. A few others getting gear, he wasn’t the only one with his hand out. Emptying his current ring with a thought he then put the new ring on and filled it instantly. The new ring was black, cool to the touch. It actually felt heavier than the gold merchant band. Storing the old ring in his new one he went through the rest of the screens. Manipulating stats, he was starting to feel a whole lot stronger. 

 

Name:	Asher Whitmore		Skills:
Alias:	Quinten Hardly		Acting	LVL MAX
System:	PORN STAR		STD Immunity	LVL MAX
Level:	14		Roleplaying	LVL MAX
Experience	3,244/25,000		Genitalia Control	LVL MAX
Title:	Lawful Good	(2)	Prop Manifestation	LVL MAX
Guild:	Community		Relationship Screen	LVL 6
Syscos:	3,590		Gardening	LVL 4
			Ahegao	LVL 5
HP:	90	/90	Slovene Language	LVL 2
MP:	75	/75	Survival	LVL 10
			Tracking	LVL 8
Stats:	0		Brawling	LVL 7
Strength:	30		Policing	LVL 8
Dexterity:	24		Economics	LVL 10
Endurance:	30		Pheromones	LVL MAX
Agility:	24		Battleshout	LVL 7
Wisdom:	25		Intimidation	LVL 6
Intelligence:	25		Powerstrike	LVL 5
Luck:	20		Taste Control	LVL MAX
Charm:	20		Justice	Level 2
			Libido Control	LVL MAX
Custom Stats:
Dick Length	8.85 Inches
Dick Diameter	1.85 Inches
Fertility	Off
Pheromones	20
Libido	10

 

“I have to say, this quest was worth it,” Ash said out loud. There were a few grunts of agreement all around. He had walked in at what, level 10? Now he was 4 levels higher. It had been a long trial, and he might be grounded when he got home, but for now he was happy. 

 

“What about the dungeon?” Abby asked. Turning around Asher noticed that the black gate was still there. 

“I was just reading the notifications on it. Apparently someone with a Dungeoneer System can manipulate the dungeon into another trial. The stronger we make it, the better the rewards the System will give.” Wayne Tyler said reading from a screen. “I guess we have to recruit a Dungeoneer.”

 

“What good is it?” Amanda asked. 

“I assume we can charge people to take the Trial,” Batman said. “I mean if people could earn titles like this, it’s worth all kinds of money. It’s practically a free level, not to mention the experience you get inside.” 

A few people nodded at that. “That’s for another day,” Wayne said. “I’ll book Raul. Penny I’m sorry but you will have to give a statement, and we will have to work on our story.” 

 

With that they headed outside. Some of the other group members were waiting at the vans to guard them. “Wow, that was fast,” an older woman said. 

 

“Fast?” Tiffany asked. “How long were we gone?” 

 

“Like an hour,” the other person said. 

 

Asher now remembered the Time Dilation notification he received at the beginning. “This stupid System,” he whispered as he looked at the clock on his phone. It read 5:30pm. The group then became a mass of chatter. One person started telling the others about how they formed a guild. Wayne said he would have everyone else join at the next meeting.

 

Tiffany ran over to Asher and said, “You know it was super sexy when you took charge like that.” 

 

“Oh yeah? How sexy?” He whispered into her ear. “Maybe you can show me tonight.”

 

“Sorry babe, I think Penny needs me,” she said. The small woman stood outside of the group. Raul was still asleep over a warrior’s shoulder. Asher remembered the whole reason for being there. 

 

“Of course,” he said. “Rain check? I kind of forgot we were supposed to have dinner with my folks, so let’s schedule that sometime ok?” With that they kissed and separated.

Asher noticed Batman going to his ride. “Hey, mind if I catch a ride to the church?” He asked hopeful. 

“Sure, hop in,” Batman said. When they were buckled up Batman asked, “So you wanna make that fuel now?” 

“With you? Not on your life. But I might be willing to consider it for this sweet ride,” he admitted. 

 

“You wish,” Batman said. 

“You wish,” Asher retorted. “I’m told I’m very good at the sex.” 

 

“The sex? Did your mom tell you that?” 

Asher barked a laugh as the engine roared. “Your mom,” he said back.