The Phoenix Saga

Ranko cursed under her breath, dumping another pan of charred eggs into the trash alongside the previous three. She was determined to get this right, but it was hard standing close to the cooktop to scramble the eggs when she could stand half a meter away from the flame and still feel like she was burning. Hearing her old doubts trying to claw their way into her mind, Ranko reminded herself that just because she wanted to learn to cook, it wasn't like she was looking to find a guy to marry her or anything. She didn't have to feel gross about it anymore. She just didn't want to be hungry, and that was allowed. She turned off the burner, her eyes lingering on the tiny pile of ash in the drip pan that had been the last remnant of her former life. She was still staring at it when there was a knock at her door.
"What the…" She fanned the smell of burnt eggs out the open window. "Come in?"
Izumi entered the room, wearing a brown coat lined with faux leopard fur over a white sweater and a hot pink knee-length skirt. "Good morning, Ranko!" She hopped excitedly onto the foot of the still-unmade bed. "Mei told me everything about last night. I'm so sorry I missed it! I hope I'll get another chance to see you sing! How did it feel?"
Ranko blushed. Her coworker, she was prepared to see first thing in the morning, but her fan club might have to wait until the caffeine kicked in. She'd taken to drinking soda instead of tea in the mornings, as it was freely available downstairs and, as an added bonus, did not feel like lava being poured down her throat to drink.
She grabbed one of the wooden chairs from around her tiny dining table, carrying it closer to the bed. She started to sit on it backward and straddle it, before remembering that she was wearing a dress and that might not be the best approach. Turning it forward, she sat down. "Hey, Izzi. You're here early today." She looked at the clock, which still read 8:04 AM. "Very early."
The older girl laughed. "Trust me, when you have kids, you'll forget what sleep feels like, too."
Ranko blushed again - she seemed to be doing that a lot more lately. "Yeeaaah, let's not get ahead of ourselves on that one, 'kay? Anyway, why did you come in so early today? Your shift doesn't start until two usually."
Izumi waved her off. "Sometimes it's just good to get out of the house and let Kaito and Hoshi have some boy time. And, more importantly, let me have some not-listening-to-children's-music time. I swear to the gods, if I ever hear about that damned itsy bitsy spider one more time…"
Ranko giggled and rolled her eyes. "Now that is a karaoke event I'd pay to see."
The brunette shook her head. "Not in a million years. But you – our very own pop idol? Who knew?"
More of that damned blushing again. "Don't get carried away. I impressed thirty drunks and half of them probably were just hoping I'd take my top off. And I'm still gonna kill Mei for putting me up to that, by the way, so if you have anything you'd like to say to her first…"
Izumi grinned, throwing a pillow at the younger girl. "Admit it, you had the time of your life up there, didn't you?"
Ranko swore, she didn't understand why girls needed makeup for their cheeks if all they ever did was blush. She didn't say anything, but she did give a guilty nod and that sent Izumi giggling again.
When her laughing subsided, she looked Ranko over a bit. She was wearing a white short-sleeved dress with a rosette at the base of the neckline, a mid-calf length skirt, and an embroidered pattern of white roses throughout. It had a white satin sash around the waist, tied in a bow at the back. Ranko would have taken it off; she thought that might be a little much, but it was sewn to the dress. Izumi knew the outfit well; it was hers. "I gotta say, you clean up good, kid."
Ranko hid her face a little bit. "I swear, if you don't stop making me blush I'm gonna black out from lack of blood to my, everything that isn't my face!" If she was going to spend the rest of her life as a girl, though, she was at least glad she was a pretty one. It opened a lot of doors for girls, she had learned.
"One sec." Izumi got up and bounced into the bathroom, opening one of the drawers. She returned with a small white object in her hand. "Here." She brushed her hand forward into Ranko's hair, pushing it out of her face, and pinning it back over her ear with a white lace bow on a banana clip. She wasn't sure how she felt about putting bows in her hair, but she had to admit it was nice to have it out of her face and at the same time, not in the braid that tugged eternally on her sensitive scalp. She craned her neck over Izumi to look into the mirror on the back of the closet door, and she couldn't help but acknowledge that she did look kind of cute. Harder still for her was acknowledging that not only was she cute, but she didn't entirely hate it.
"Get your shoes and come downstairs with me."
Ranko nodded, happy to oblige. She'd kind of left her room in a state of disarray last night after her epiphany, and was kind of embarrassed. She bounded down the stairs after Izumi, and was surprised to be greeted in the bar kitchen by Hana. "Man, does nobody sleep on Fridays around here? Good morning, Hana."
The bar's matriarch waved. "Morning, Ranko. You look nice."
Ranko smiled, managing not to blush for a change. "Thank you. Apparently I have a second job as Izzi's personal dress-up model."
Izumi laughed, affecting a posh accent. "And you're fahhhbulous, dahhling. Simply smashing."
Ranko looked around, seeing that Hana already had a fair amount of prep work done, but it didn't seem to match the types of food and such that they normally served. "Okay, I'll bite, what's going on with all this?"
Izumi gestured to the trays. "Somebody booked the whole place for a private party tonight. Some super-important brat or something."
Ranko nodded, picking up an black apron from a hook on the wall. She didn't normally wear them, but she was wearing all white, and she didn't want to hurt Izumi's dress. "What can I do to help?"
Hana set her whisk down, walking over to her and snatching the apron from her hands before she could put it on. "You can do absolutely nothing. It's your night off."
Ranko hadn't seen a schedule; she kind of assumed that she would work every night so long as she was getting free room and board. "Are you sure? There looks like so much work to do. I'm happy to pitch in. Come on, Izzi, let's give her a hand."
Izumi smirked, shaking her head and crossing her legs, having taken up a spot on a steel stool in the corner. "Sorry, no can do. It's my day off, too."
Ranko looked at her incredulously. After everything Hana had done for her, she wouldn't pitch in and help? "If you're not scheduled to work, what are you doing here? And at the butt-crack of dawn, no less?"
Izumi grinned at Hana. "You didn't tell her." She didn't look up from her stirring.
"I did not," Izzi replied.
Ranko looked between them, confused. "Okay, you're making me nervous now."
"I've been given an important mission, one that I am uniquely qualified to handle." She took Ranko's hand. "I am under orders to get you the hell out of this bar for a few hours and show you a good time. You haven't seen outside these doors in days."
Ranko laughed a bit. "That's not true. I totally took the trash out on Wednesday." She turned to Hana. "Are you sure you don't need help? I really don't mind."
Hana waved her off. "Mei and Yui will be here any minute. I'll be fine. Get upstairs and get your stuff. Now."
Ranko stepped back, putting her hands up. "Okay, okay, I surrender." She grinned. "Be right back." She darted upstairs, grabbing her wallet. She looked at it with some measure of disdain - it was quite obvious that it wasn't the sort of thing a girl would carry, and she couldn't exactly hide it; this dress did not sport the miraculous pockets of the one she wore the day before. Not knowing what else to do, she pulled a few bills from her wallet and rolled them up, palming them in her hand and heading downstairs.
Izumi held the back door out of the kitchen open as soon as she appeared, grabbing Ranko by the hand. "Come on, you."
A few minutes later, they found themselves seated next to each other on a train into the shopping district. "So, listen, Ranko," her companion began, "If you can think of anything fun you'd like to do, let me know. Besides that, is there anything you need? I know you kinda…" She looked around the train, not wanting to embarrass her friend and new surrogate sister. "... packed light."
Ranko nodded, appreciating her discretion. The reality was, she knew there were things she needed, but she had no idea how to shop for them, and there was no way she could reasonably bring it up without looking like she had no idea how to be a girl.
"Hey, is your hand okay? You've had it in a fist since we got on the train."
Ranko blushed a bit. "Yeah, just didn't have any pockets, so…" Izumi shook her head in disbelief. "Okay. First order of business, then. We need to get you a bag. Fortunately for you, you are in the presence of a grand master black belt shopper." Izumi made a little mocking gesture like she was taking a karate pose, and though Ranko was a bit embarrassed, she couldn't help but laugh. Her form was terrible.
"Well, Izzi, how's about we leave the shopping to you, and the martial arts to me?"
The older girl shook her head. "Better idea. Let's teach each other."
The doors of the train hissed open, and Izumi stood. "C'mon, Ran-chan. First stop." Ranko stood and followed, having really no earthly idea what she had gotten herself into by agreeing to go on this trip. She was concerned about spending a day shopping; she had made some money over the last week, but not nearly enough that she could afford to be frivolous.
"So, this is a good place to start." Izzi curved into a small shop containing hundreds of little white cylindrical podiums, each displaying some different sort of purse or bag, with little spotlights highlighting each one. Ranko looked around in disbelief. Do girls actually need so many of these things?
"Do you see anything you like?"
Ranko looked around, and really hadn't the slightest idea what to think. She shrugged. "I'm not exactly the poster child for cute. Do you have any advice?"
Izumi looked her over head to toe. "Girl, if you don't think you can pull off cute, there's no hope for any of us." Ranko's face caught fire, and she looked down at her feet demurely. It only enhanced the effect in Izumi's eyes. "So, you don't have a purse at all right now?"
Izumi's shopping protege shook her head. "No, I… um, it got stolen." A lie, but beat the hell out of saying she'd only been a girl for eight months and hadn't really thought about it.
Izumi nodded. "Okay. In that case, we're not looking for something specialized to match an outfit perfectly or anything, but something a little more neutral that can go with everything. So we're looking mostly for black, white, gray or tan. That eliminates about half the store. Making progress! Now, you don't have a ton of stuff to carry; eventually you might need a decent-sized bag like this one for makeup and stuff, but for right now we're looking for keys, wallet, ID, stuff like that. So we don't need anything huge. We're not going formal gowns, so clutches are out; we want something with backpack straps or a shoulder strap." Ranko watched her work; this was like a science to Izumi. It was honestly kind of impressive.
"Since it's going to be a daily driver, we probably want to nix white; it'll show a lot of scuffs if you carry it all the time. Something darker will look good longer with repeated use. So, I think we're looking black or dark gray, small sized, shoulder straps or backpack straps. There can't be too many of those. Let's start looking!"
Izumi scurried off to her left. Ranko was tempted to follow, but clearly the expectation was that she could hold her own, so she decided to try. Walking by several dozen options that Izumi's criteria had eliminated, she picked up a pewter-colored shoulder bag. It was large enough to maybe carry two or three of her wallet back at the bar, though she suspected it would be getting retired. The strap was a silver-colored metal chain. She picked it up, not sure at all what to do next. Izumi was on the entirely opposite side of the store right now, blazing through the displays like a bargain-seeking missile, so Ranko decided to keep looking.
The next bag she picked up was a black leather bag that was taller than it was wide, with a long shoulder strap designed to be worn cross-body. It had a flap that opened from the top and buckled in the front with a silver clasp that was shaped like a rose. A border of white flowers lined the edge of the flap on three sides. It looked like it could hold perhaps a small hardcover book. Ranko picked it up, looking at it with the sort of mystified expression that one would expect had they just found an alien.
"Now that is cute!"
Ranko looked up from her examination as Izumi closed on her.
"Open it up?"
Ranko complied, though she had no idea what would constitute good or bad once she saw it.
"Okay, so it's got lots of little pockets inside. That's great if you aren't going to carry a separate wallet and everything, and you can still keep things organized. But it's got a big enough central compartment that you can carry something of decent size if you needed to." Izumi grabbed the little yellow tag dangling from the strap. "And it's on sale, too. You're better at this than you let on!" Ranko chuckled nervously. She hadn't seen the price tag, but she already dreaded it.
"Do you like it?"
Ranko shrugged. "It's nice, I think." It wasn't over the top girly with big pink bows and sequins like a lot of what the store carried, and it did fit all of Izumi's exacting criteria.
Izumi beamed excitedly. "Why don't we grab this one then, and if we see something else later, maybe we grab that too?" This was sounding expensive already. Ranko nodded tentatively, feeling fairly pressured to go along with this whole endeavor. She had planned to spend the morning peeling potatoes when she woke up, and this was still quite a culture shock.
Izumi picked up the bag, setting down the selections they'd rejected, and carried it to the counter. Ranko began to count out her money, but Izumi waved her off. "Mama sent me with a budget. We got this. I'd tell you to put it away, but I guess you can't until we finish ringing out." Izumi giggled, and Ranko smiled sheepishly. She hated the idea of more handouts, but she did need some things and didn't want to be rude and refuse. Besides, if she was going to learn to live this new life - and she had committed to herself that she would do so just a few hours earlier - she was going to need to figure some of this stuff out, and Izumi was being an excellent mentor whether she knew it or not.
Izumi completed the transaction, breaking the string holding the price tag on the strap and handing it to her. "Here you go!"
Ranko smiled nervously. "Thanks!" She opened it, finding a small pocket with a zipper closure and putting the fistful of bills she'd been carrying for an hour into it. At least that way they'd be more secure in there. She slung the bag over her shoulder, and it hung down almost to her knees. "What do you think?"
Izumi put her head in her palm and shook her head, smiling amusedly. "Oh, honey. What are we going to do with you?" She reached over to the strap, using the buckle to tighten it to a more reasonable length, and then picked it up off of Ranko's shoulder and draped it over her head onto the opposite shoulder. "There. Much better."
Ranko agreed – not only would it not bang her knees when she walked, but having it close to her body meant it would stay put better if she had to fight while wearing it.
"Okay! On to the next stop!" This was supposed to be Ranko's day out, but Izumi was clearly more excited about it. She fidgeted with the bag strapped to her side, the black leather contrasting with the white dress she had on. She knew that she'd never be able to hide her confusion for long under these circumstances. She had to come up with something, fast.
"Hey, Izzi – thanks for your advice. I'm kind of embarrassed that I'm not better at this. My dad and I left home when I was really little, so I really never got to know my mother and I didn't have any sisters or anything. I guess I'm trying to say, I never really had any girls to learn all of this stuff from. I'm really sorry; I want to be excited and all, I just kind of feel like an idiot." A tomboy, more like. She had thought to use that word first, but decided against it because it felt like admitting something was wrong with her. A wave of guilt crashed over her – is this how it had felt every time she'd used that word to describe Akane? No wonder she was always so mad. She wondered if she'd ever get a chance to apologize. She doubted it.
Izumi stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, turning to face her. She took Ranko's hands in her own. "I don't know how many times we have to tell you this, Ranko, but… You do have sisters now. You don't have to be embarrassed about where you come from or the situation you grew up in. You don't have to apologize for your past. We've all been through hell and none of us are in a place to judge anybody. If you want to keep doing what you're doing, that's fine. Nobody's going to try to change you. But if you want help with this stuff, we are here for you." She smiled a little. "Hana found all of us because our own families weren't there for us. But now we've become an even stronger family because all of us chose to be here rather than being born into it by dumb luck." With a closing step, she wrapped her arm around Ranko's shoulders. "You aren't alone anymore, little sister. Not in this, not in anything."
Ranko felt herself melt into the taller girl's arms. Not being alone anymore really did sound amazing. Even when she'd lived with the Tendos, with six other people in the house, she always felt like she was on an island of her own and nobody truly understood her, or cared to try. "I don't know what I did to deserve meeting you all, but I'm glad."
Izumi pulled back from the hug so she could look Ranko in the eyes. "We all are, too."
She took Ranko by the hand. "This must be so overwhelming for you. You've been with us barely a week and here we are declaring ourselves your family, dragging you shopping just when you've finally got a little money in your pocket – well, your purse!" She giggled a little. "We can do this at your own pace. Please tell me, or any of us, if we're being too overbearing. We want to help relieve pressure on you, not add more."
Ranko nodded in understanding and appreciation. "Izzi, that means more to me than you know. My whole life I have felt like I am trying to live up to everybody else's expectations. I want to live for me for a while, and I'm not really sure I know what that looks like." She looked down at her new bag, and the hem of her dress flitting lightly in the breeze. "I've been terrible at being a girl, and it's made everything so awkward for me. I'm not trying to be a Barbie doll or anything, but I think I would like to learn a little bit. At least, enough that I don't just come off as weird." Ranko was here to stay, so she needed to stop acting like she was still trying to be a boy.
Izumi nodded. "I think we can work with that, miss Ranko." Poor thing, having to grow up as a teenage girl without anybody to teach her about makeup, or prepare her for changes a woman's body goes through at a certain age, or any of that stuff. While all of the girls in their little group had been abandoned by their families, none so early as hers apparently had.
Izumi smiled disarmingly, and Ranko blushed. Being called Ranko she was adjusting to well, but she didn't know that she'd ever get used to being a miss. This was your decision. You let go of your old life so you had room to build a new one, and that's going to be a little uncomfortable for a while, she coached herself mentally.
Izumi slid herself onto a bench in a little grassy patch, inviting Ranko to join her. "So, why don't you tell me what you think you want to do, and I'll see if I can help?" Ranko looked up at her nervously, and Izumi continued. "Honey, I told you. No judgment. If you want, we don't even have to tell Hana and the others anything." Izumi smiled reassuringly, placing her arm around the shorter girl's shoulders again, and Ranko blushed.
Even if she did know what she needed - and she doubted she did - she didn't know how she'd ever formulate the words to ask for it. A few short weeks ago, she'd have clobbered anybody who suggested she wear a dress, let alone carry a purse or all of this extra stuff. She wondered if she had made a huge mistake; she had decided to accept living as Ranko, but was she fully prepared for what that would entail?
She swallowed hard. The only way out of this was through.
"I, um…" She bit her bottom lip nervously. "There's just so much. I don't know what's important, or even what I'm not thinking of. I'm sorry. This is so embarrassing. I mean, I essentially grew up like a boy, and I have no idea what I'm doing." If only Izumi knew how literally she meant that. It would be so much easier if Ranko could tell her, "I was a guy until eight months ago," but that seemed like it wouldn't end well for anybody.
Izumi nodded. "It's okay. What did I tell you about apologizing? Girls learn this stuff one step at a time growing up, and so will you. I've got you. Would it be easier if I made suggestions?"
Ranko nodded emphatically. "Please?"
She stood up, offering Ranko her hand. "Come on, Cinderella. Let's get you ready for the ball."