The Northern Duke’s Daughter Will Never Fall

Chapter 20: A Woman Who Can’t See Him as a Man, A Man Who Can’t See Her as a Woman

“…Ah, a-ah.”

Silence quickly filled the room.

“…I, I did knock…”

Astein’s words sounded more like an excuse.

But it wasn’t exactly the kind of statement that could ease the current situation.

Astrid’s eyes shook violently.

‘No, I didn’t mean for it to go this far. It’s not like I said it for him to hear…’
She thought that far but quickly realized that, no matter how one looked at it, it was clear as day that it was backbiting.

There’s a saying that if you can’t say something to a person’s face, you shouldn’t say it behind their back either. But Astrid had just broken that rule in spectacular fashion.

So much so that it left no room for rebuttal.

Eranya glanced at Astrid’s expression and, sensing the mood, slowly got up. Lowering her body as much as she could, she scurried like a cat trying to avoid attention, inching toward the door to slip away unnoticed.

She grabbed Astein’s wrist, who was standing awkwardly between Astrid and Leopold, unsure of what to do, and practically dragged him into the hallway.

Now, it was just Astrid and Leopold, standing there with the door between them, gazing at one another.

The air was cold, and Astrid found herself unable to decide whether she should apologize or try to smooth things over in some other way. Her mind was a tangle of indecision when Leopold let out a small sigh and gave her a broad smile.

“…Let’s go eat, Squad Leader.”

“R-right, let’s do that.”

Despite everything, Leopold didn’t say much else.

Even as they walked down the hallway, descended the stairs, and headed toward the mess hall, Leopold remained silent.

It was Astrid, not him, who was visibly restless.

* * *

“You said it’s for a week, right?”

“Yes.”

On the tray were a piece of white bread with a few raisins stuck here and there, some mashed turnips, and a yellow soup with a couple of corn kernels floating in it.

They called it a “war ration recreation” event, limited to one week, but what was even the point of recreating something like this?

It made Astrid think that no matter where you went, the people in charge always found ways to assign pointless, unnecessary tasks to soldiers.

‘Wait, aren’t I supposed to be an officer candidate?’

She took a spoonful of the soup, but the taste was so ambiguous that she couldn’t tell if it was corn soup or corn silk tea.

Even Astrid, who wasn’t usually picky about food and ate whatever was given to her, had to admit that this was a bit much.

‘Well, at least there’s only five more days of this…’ Or was it six? She wasn’t sure when the week officially started, but either way, there’s that saying that “the beginning is half the battle,” right?

The atmosphere at the dining table was anything but pleasant. Considering what had just happened before they gathered for the meal, it would’ve been more surprising if everyone’s mood had been good.

After finally managing to choke down the barely edible meal, she returned her tray and walked outside. The other squad members were already waiting for her.

Somehow, she had ended up being the last to finish eating. Even though she ate the least, she still ate the slowest. It was a little embarrassing for Astrid. She momentarily chastised herself for eating so slowly and making everyone wait.

Once they all gathered, they headed back to their dormitory. After that, they could each retreat to their rooms and have some free time.

There’d be no work assembly bells blaring or camp announcements echoing. It was a rare, peaceful break.

“Leopold Cadet…”

A faint voice called to Leopold, who was just about to enter the dormitory entrance.

He turned around.

Standing there was the first squad’s leader, Astrid. Her pale white face and silver hair glowed faintly under the dim evening light. She was avoiding his gaze, her eyes directed elsewhere.

“What’s the matter, Squad Leader?” Leopold’s voice was calm, surprisingly so.

He had heard those words directly to his face, but to his own surprise, he felt nothing.
Was it because the words didn’t hurt him? Or was it because—

—he never really saw Astrid as a woman to begin with? He wasn’t quite sure which.

“Could I speak with you for a moment?”

There was a brief pause. Her words were within the range of what Leopold had expected.

He’d figured she’d be concerned about what she had said earlier, and sure enough, that’s exactly what was happening.

“Alright.”

It wasn’t the kind of conversation they’d want to have in front of others. It would be better to sit on a quiet bench somewhere instead of talking in the dormitory.

“Huh?”

Watching from afar, Akemilla’s eyes followed the figures of Leopold and Astrid as they walked toward the back of the dormitory.

“I was just about to call for them, but…”

Her eyes narrowed slightly, and the subtle curve at the corners of her eyes hinted at mischief. She looked amused, like she’d stumbled upon something very interesting.

* * *

“Have a seat.”

To be honest, Astrid had to admit she’d gone too far with her words.

She’d heard those kinds of comments so many times before.

—”Sorry, but I just can’t see you as a man.”

—”Can’t we just stay friends?”

—”You’re like a comfortable friend to me…”

‘But to think there’d come a day when I’d be the one saying those words…!’

And on top of that, she’d said it not to his face but behind his back.
On top of that, she’d gotten caught.

‘Aaaahhhhh!!!!’

To make it even worse, the person she’d said it about was none other than her fiancé, Leopold.

“Squad Leader, didn’t you say you had something to discuss?”

There was no one else around the bench where they sat. Most of the other cadets had returned to the dormitory after dinner to relax. It seemed few others had any reason to be wandering around at this hour like Astrid and Leopold.

‘At least that’s fortunate.’

“Um, Leopold Ca—I mean, Your Highness.”

“Please call me ‘Cadet’ instead.”

It felt like a line had been drawn. There was no way to visually draw a line with words, but somehow, that’s how it felt to Astrid.

“Leopold Cadet. About what happened earlier…”

“If you’re referring to ‘what happened earlier,’ I’m afraid I’m not sure what you mean.”

Astrid turned her head slightly to glance at Leopold.

Leopold seemed to have not been looking at Astrid from the beginning. He sat leaning at an angle against the bench, gazing straight ahead.

The sight of him, legs crossed and reclining casually on the bench, suddenly struck Astrid as quite picturesque.

‘He does have the look of a crown prince…’ If only he didn’t have the temperament of a petty man.

Astrid sighed inwardly. He’s sulking. No, it’s not “like” he’s sulking—he’s definitely sulking.

‘Ah, what a petty man.’

“About what I said before—about not seeing you as a man, and not being able to see you as one—that.”

“Ah… that.”

Leopold uncrossed his legs and sat up straight, this time meeting Astrid’s gaze directly.

His blue eyes bore into hers, and it made her feel so self-conscious that she turned her head away as naturally as possible.

“Why would that be something you need to apologize for?”

His response was completely unexpected.

Honestly, she’d expected him to blow up. She’d expected him to rant about how no fiancée should be saying such things, or how no one should dare say such a thing to the crown prince of a nation. But instead, Leopold’s reaction had completely surpassed her expectations—he was calm, even poised.

“It’s something that can’t be helped, isn’t it?”

“What?”

“Whether you’re a fiancée or fiancé, it’s irrelevant. Astrid Cadet.”

“Yes? I’m listening.”

Leopold shifted his position and sat right next to Astrid.

Even though there was still a bit of space left between them, Leopold scooted closer.

He moved so close that their hips touched, and then, with his face uncomfortably close to hers, he spoke.

“So, what do you think? Do you feel anything?”

“…I’m not sure what you mean.” ‘What does he mean, “feel anything”? What is he trying to say?’

Leopold’s fingers lifted Astrid’s chin.

His deep blue eyes gazed straight into hers.

They were so close that if either of them moved just a little, their lips would touch. Their breaths mingled at that distance.

“How about now?”

“…No.”

“Astrid, my fiancée, my beloved Astrid.”

The sudden words left her stunned.

‘What’s gotten into him? Has he lost his mind?’

“Now, how about this? Do you feel anything now?”

“Not particularly.”

Leopold gazed into her face intently.

He’d asked her if she felt anything, but honestly, Leopold didn’t feel anything either.

Even as they sat pressed together, close enough for their skin to feel each other’s warmth, even as their lips hovered just shy of touching—it’s common for such proximity to make the heart race or cause feelings of excitement. But astonishingly, he felt nothing.

Leopold smiled faintly.

‘Yeah, I figured as much.’

It was the same for him. Even as he sat so close, even as he went out of his way to provoke her like this, he didn’t feel a single thing.

And from the looks of it, neither did Astrid.

She was simply staring at him with an expression that seemed to ask, “What’s this guy’s problem?” There wasn’t even a hint of emotional reaction on her face.

‘Yeah… that’s about right.’

“Astrid Cadet, do you understand now?”

“Understand what?”

Leopold released her chin and leaned back, once again crossing his legs as he reclined against the bench.

He gazed at Astrid from his seat, his eyes as clear and unwavering as ever.

“Astrid Cadet, you said that you didn’t see me as a man, and that you couldn’t see me as one.”

“I… did say that. But I was going to apologize for it…!”

Leopold waved his hand, cutting off her words before she could continue.

There was no need to hear any more.

There was no need for apologies either.

Feelings like these aren’t something that can be resolved with a simple apology.

“There’s no need to apologize. I’m the same.”

Astrid’s face showed a flicker of confusion.

Her face, usually as cold and expressionless as a sheet of ice, showed just a trace of bewilderment.

“The same… how?”

“Just as I said.”

Leopold took a small breath.

This wasn’t some petty, childish attempt at revenge.

He was just stating the plain truth.

“Even if we’re this close, close enough to feel the warmth of each other’s skin, even if we’re so close that a slight movement would make our lips touch—I feel nothing at all.”

“W-what…?”

“Astrid Cadet, it’s as simple as that. I don’t see you as a woman, and I can’t see you as one either.”

To a woman who’d said, “I don’t see you as a man, and I can’t see you as one,” there was no reason for Leopold to see her as a woman either.