The Mad Rat’s Lab

“So, when do you want to play all three together?”

Asks Laura after class. Both Ricard and Laura are sitting next to me right now.

“It’s fine for me, but how do you want to do it? Do we prepare a perfect team? Or simply bring our champions? I warn you I’m not going to change the Mad Rat in any way!”

“Hahaha…” She makes a weird laugh, as if saying ‘I already knew’. “I also would like to use my succubus. I like it!”

Yeah, me too. Then I could watch those huge bouncy and jiggly masses from up close. Thank you for helping with my private time, Laura! Hehehe! (pervert laughing).

“Then if you take those two champions, I think I should pick a tanky champion to compensate. Andreu could play the spellcaster role, and you Laura can play the support role with the succubus. Having a charm CC on demand can be very powerful!”

Of course, this last one is Ricard. His eyes are starting to gleam, so we need to stop him from running amok before it’s too late.

“Are you going to bring the Revenant as the last time?” I ask.

“Hmmm… I’m not sure. Because the ice aura is dangerous in a party. Last time, I didn’t have time to create another champion, but if we properly plan this one, I can bring a better one…”

“Ok! I also find that it could be better to use some other unit than the Revenant for your champion. Sure, the resurrect skill is broken, but with thirty seconds to wait, it’s too long. It’s a good skill for dungeon mobs, but for a Champion is too much time. You do remember that last time your skill was useless, right?”

“Well, you are right in that front. Then maybe a Death Knight? It’s tanky enough, and its innate passive, Essence Siphon is very good for sustaining oneself.”

“Yes, I think this is a way better skill than the other one.”

As we talk, Laura looks from the side as if she doesn’t properly understand what we are talking about. She wasn’t there last time, so it’s normal.

“Then, we will have a spellcaster, a tank and a support. Laura, you should take at least one healing skill to help us survive. And the rest can be whatever you want as long as it brings utility to the party.”

As Ricard keeps talking, his expression suddenly brightens and a smile appears on his face.

“You know? In fact we could prepare everything for the next DMA event! Basically, it’s going to be a dungeon battle royale. In teams, players will dive into other player’s dungeons and compete for who beats the other’s dungeon first! And the winners pass to the next round, as in any tournament.”

As he realizes something, his expression changes to a gloomy one. “Oh, but it’s a shame… We need a team of four players for this competition…”

We need to be four players but we are only three… If only one of us knew of somebody who played DMA too and could play together…

Oh, wait! I do! I know two, in fact! Both my sisters play DMA now! But if I ask Marta, she’s going to say no for sure. Maybe Clara will want to? No way, right?

Who am I kidding… As soon as I open my mouth to say to play together, she’s going to agree. Regardless of the situation and with whom, if I ask her, she’ll agree. I hope so.

“And I hoped I could play in this tournament… I couldn’t last time because I didn’t have DMA and won’t play in this one because I don’t have a team…”

Meanwhile, Ricard is making a face as if wanting to cry. And Laura is simply staring at him as if looking at a kid. Well, he does behave like one, sometimes. Like right now. Or like most of the time, actually.

“Hey, what are you crying for, Ricard?”

“I’m not crying, ok? It’s just that I wanted to participate and I can’t!”

“You know you could always ask random players to play with you, right?”

“What are you saying!? If I play, it must be with a carefully crafted team, with previous experience and with the chances to actually win! Who would play it otherwise!?”

*Sigh* See? This is why you don’t get a girlfriend. You look at everything as if it were a competition!

I don’t have a girlfriend either, but it's just because I don’t feel like it, ok...? Don’t look at me with those judging eyes! I swear it’s true!

“If you are ok with it, I can ask my little sister if she wants to play together and participate in the tournament too. But I can’t make promises.” Though I’m sure she will accept.

“Your little sister, you say!?” Immediately, Ricard’s expression switches from grief to joy. 

“Yeah, my little sister. Her birthday was this past Sunday and got DMA as a birthday present. So she’s now playing the game too. If you don’t care about her being low level…”

“Who cares about the level, or about winning or losing the tournament, if we can play together with your little sister! So, when are you introducing us?”

“Guy, calm down! I didn’t ask her yet! And why did you switch your stance so fast!? You still don’t know her!” And weren’t you complaining just a second ago that if you participate in the tournament you must aim to win it!? How can you be so cheap!?

“It’s a little sister! I’m sure she’s cute, and small! And huggable!”

“She’s eighteen, ok?” His expression changes yet again to my words. To grief. What are you, a pervert!? Someone, call the police! “And don’t be a pervert, she’s going to kick your thing if you ever mention something like this in front of her.”

“Ah, well, anyway… So you’re asking her, right? And what faction is she playing as?”

“As the Abyss faction. For some reason or another, she thinks the Abyss units are ‘cute’.”

At these words, he shudders and looks away. “Y-you know, after all, we can also p-participate next time and look for another player… Y-yes, let’s do it!”

Oho? It seems like I’m not the only one scared of the Abyss units. Now I MUST ask Clara and MAKE SURE she plays with us.

You know, suffering must be shared between friends, right? I can’t be the only one to suffer, right!?

“You know? I already told you I would ask her, so now I must keep my word.”

“Depending on how you look at them, I also think that some of the Abyss units can be considered cute, you know?”

Not you too, Laura! I have enough with my little sister!

“W-what!?” Exclaims Ricard.

“Ahahaha, well, those with little mouths and tentacles, they are somewhat cute…”

I quickly interrupt Laura before she turns into Clara 2.0. “I’m almost sure she’s going to agree, so we can start planning the party. She just started so she can only use the first champion. A humanoid one, formed by lots of tentacles. I don’t know the name.”

“Oh, yeah, I know it! Then the decision it’s the same as before! Only that this time your sister is going to complement our party. We are still lacking single target damage, so as long as she takes skills that help with it, we are going to have a decent party. B-but are you sure you want your sister? W-we can still look for another player, you know?”

“Hahaha! Don’t worry! I’m sure she will like the idea!”

And I’m going to drag you into the abyss with me! Hahaha! I’m not going to suffer alone anymore!

“Wait a moment! Please reconsider it!”

Shouts Ricard. Me and Laura look at him with condescending eyes.

“Can you stop being a kid already?” Says Laura.

“T-then… at least let me be the one to name the team! I won’t concede on this!”

“I don’t care, so feel free. But stop behaving like this and grow up already!”

“Yeah, stop being a kid.” I say while struggling to hide a grin. My new despairing mate, why are you trying to run away? Come here and join me! Let’s despair together!

Ignoring our words, Ricard is muttering to himself.

“...we are an undead, a demon, a flesh monstrosity or mad scientist, and a creature from the abyss… yeah, there’s only one name I can properly think of! Hahahah! This is a great name! People are going to tremble upon hearing it! Hahaha!”

After a while of leaving Ricard to his own delusions, I finally ask him. “So, what’s the oh-so-great name that you thought of?

“Hear this epic and great name! You see, taking into account our factions, there’s only one possible name that I can think of, and it’s also the best name ever! You have to thank me for this epic name…”

“Can you tell us the fucking name already?” Interrupts Laura.

“...Yes… The name we are going to use is this one! Attention please, so that you don’t miss it! The name is: ‘The League of Evil’! Hahahahaha! How do you like it? Awesome, right!?”

“...”

“...”

WHY!? Just… WHY!?

 

---

 

*Knock, knock*

I lightly knock on Clara’s room. There’s no answer.

“How weird. I could swear I heard her coming inside just a while ago…”

As I’m thinking I might be confused and heard it wrong, something touches my shoulder. And as I turn my head to see what it is…

“Aaagh!” I shout as I fall to the ground.

Slowly, I try to crawl away in fear. It’s a nightmare! That monster with lots of mouths and eyes is coming to eat me!

“Aaaaagh! I thought I wasn’t having those nightmares anymore! Don’t come! Don’t eat me, please! I’ve had enough of this already!”

“Pfffft…! Hahahaha!”

I hear some laughter. But in my nightmares there’s only the monster. There's definitely nobody laughing in them… What’s going on?

“Hahahaha! Andreu! You had to see your reaction! It was so funny!”

Is that… Clara’s voice? Why are you inside my nightmare? Are you inside my dreams to torment me even more than you already have?

“Hahahaha! Please! Pfffft! Don’t eat me!”

Says Clara, trying to imitate my own voice. Now that I’ve turned around, I can see Clara standing in the hallway, looking in my direction and laughing uncontrollably.

She’s holding onto a plushie? A plushie of that monstrosity from the Abyss faction!?

“D-don’t scare me like that! It’s not funny, ok!? I almost died because of a heart attack!” I say while trying to stand from the ground. But my legs are still trembling and I can’t.

“Hahahah! A heart attack! You are so funny sometimes, Andreu!”

“And where did you get that plushie? Did you just get it so that you could torment me? Because if you are going to use it to torment me, I’m going to burn it at the stake!”

The fear is fading away and is being replaced by anger.

“Hahahaha! Calm down, Andreu! I just got it now, and since it was such a good opportunity to scare you, I couldn’t hold myself back! Hahaha! Please forgive me! I won’t do it again!”

Then, with a lower voice, she mutters something. I think she just said ‘…with this plushie, I mean…’.

“Don’t you dare come with another one either!” I warn her in advance. They say prevention is better than healing, right? “Hmmm… anyway, I came to ask you something, so put that plushie away first!”

“Yeeees!”

She then enters her room, leaves the plushie on top of her bed and comes out again. See? You can be a good little sister when you want. Though only when you want.

“Now, what did you want to ask?”

“I came to ask you if you would like to play together…”

“Yes! I’ll play with you!” 

She interrupts me before I can finish the sentence.

“Like I was saying, would you like to play together with me and…”

“Yes! I will! What are we playing?”

Aaaaaagh! Please stop interrupting already! I’m happy that you agree, but let me finish first!

“Let me finish already! Don’t interrupt until I finish!”

“Ok!” Says Clara with a ‘I’m sorry’ face. I’m almost sure she only apologizes to avoid the situation where I change my mind and not play with her because I got angry.

*Sigh!* “As I already tried to say twice… Would you like to play with me and my college friends in DMA? We are creating a party to participate in the next DMA’s battle royale event, and we need a party of four players. We'll play together a few times before the tournament, and then we’ll participate in it.”

I look at her and she looks at me. I wait for an answer, but she doesn't say anything. How weird… Usually, she would be jumping in excitement right now… I have just promised her to play several times together in the next weeks, after all.

“Sooo… you don’t like it? Why are you staying silent?”

“Huh? You said I shouldn’t interrupt until you finished, right? But you didn’t say you finished, so I was waiting… Hehe.”

You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you? And don’t ‘hehe’ me!

*Sigh* “I already finished, so… what are you saying?”

“Yes! I’ll join you and your friends! But this means I’ll need to reach level 3 as fast as possible! You’ll help me, right!?”

“Ooooh, yeah. I’ll help you. I’ll even ask my friends to enter your dungeon so that you can level up faster.”

Hahahaha! You had it coming, Ricard! Laura did ask for me to forgive her, and even helped me to get the Shadow body. But I still remember you are also a traitor, so I’ll make you dive into my sister’s dungeon! Hahaha! This is the much awaited revenge!

“Thank you! I love you, Andreu!”

As she says this, she opens the door again and enters her bedroom. But before closing the door, she asks in a cute voice and pose.

“So… Can I choose the name for the party? Pretty please!?”

She asks while making puppy eyes.

“The name’s already settled, so you can’t. I’m sorry, Clara.” I say while patting her head.

I’m very sorry, Clara, but Ricard insisted on that name. As much as I would like to change it, I can’t anymore… So we must have to use it during the tournament.

“The name’s ‘The League of Evil’.”

She then makes a disgusted face, as if wanting to say ‘are you kidding me?’.

I’m sorry, but I’m not kidding. I also had the same face as you earlier today.

 

Even if the only one who liked the name was Ricard, the name actually brought the attention of the tournament watchers. Because of how lame it was. Regardless of their individual opinions, thanks to this name their supporters increased fast, and by the end of the tournament, all four of them were quite famous. They do say there’s no negative fame, after all…