NOVEL NEXT Chapter 9: Home Life
Game
Thoughts
"Talking"
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"How did you do that?!"
"Do what?"
"Grow those!"
"...Grow these?"
"Yeah! You used to look like me! Share your secret!" Naruto idly bit into a waffle as he watched Shirone repeatedly poke at Ophis's now ridiculously large breasts. They hung off her short body, being even bigger than Yasaka's as they nearly reached her waist.
"Did they get even bigger?" Naruto asked as he stared at the duo.
"Yes. You love sucking on the fox's stupidly big balloons. I had to beat her." Ophis answered.
"Show me how!" Shrine whined, poking at the huge breasts.
"You can suck on them now if you want," Ophis said, watching as Naruto stared at her massive boobs.
"Hey! Not in front of Konou!" Naruto said, placing his hand over Konou's eyes as she sat next to him.
"Um, actually, there was a time skip. I'm not that young anymore. Also, Yokai-lore wise I have nine tails, so I'm probably like a thousand years ol-," Kunou started helpfully.
"Shush, young Kunou. Now is not the time."
"Naru-channnnnnnnnn!" A voice whined behind him, and suddenly a huge weight landed on his head.
"Yeah, Venelana?" Naruto asked as her huge breasts flopped over his head, hanging down into his eyes.
"Are you replacing me?" She whined.
"Huh?"
"The new girl! We already have 3 milfs, and now you're bringing in another!" She said.
"Whoqse thhe nuew gurl?" Naruto asked as he continued eating his waffle. At this point, these conversations didn't surprise him anymore.
"The fallen!"
"She's just here because Azazel's making me watch them."
"Then why's she wearing that?"
Naruto glanced over, looking at Kalawarner as she and Raynare stood in front of a stove cooking breakfast. They were both in maid outfits similar to Grayfia's, but a lot lewder. The entire blue portion of the outfit was gone, leaving just a small white skirt and the white bra-like part covering their breasts.
"Because they won't take it off."
When the fallen had shown up in maid outfits straight out of a porno, he tried to make them wear something normal. To the surprise of no one, It didn't work.
"Why not? Just tell them to change," Kunou said as if it was obvious.
"Kalawarner, Raynare?"
"Yes Kami-sama?" They responded in unison.
"Can you two change into something more normal?"
Persuasion Check
[Rolling…]
[God's Luck] has added [ERROR]
Your [LEGENDARY] Debuff - [Bad Timing] has deactivated your [God's Luck] Perk!
1!
Check failed!
"This uniform was part of the negotiations between Azazel-sama and Rias-sama," Kalawarner replied.
"See?" Naruto deadpanned at Venelana.
"Fine. Just don't forget who the best milf is," Venelana pouted, puffing out her chest.
"She doesn't even have a kid. Wait, do you?" Naruto looked over at Kalawarner.
"Nope. You can change that though, if you want!" She gave him a wink, which Naruto ignored.
"See?"
"Naruto," Venelana said, her face turning deathly serious, "Through my hundreds of years of living, I have learned many things. Remember these words of wisdom for the rest of your life: It is not the child that makes the milf. It is the milf that makes the child."
…
"The hell does that mean?"
Venelana didn't answer as she left the room.
"Kami-sama! Look what we made you!" Raynare shouted, running over with a giant pot in her hand.
What now…
"Ramen?" Naruto asked, his eyes wide. The pot was filled to the brim with noodles.
"Your favorite!" Raynare nodded, Kalawarner peeking over her shoulder, "I've read every manga chapter! I know what you like!"
She set the pot down and handed Naruto a fork. He stared down, his face becoming deathly serious. Slowly, he reached down, wrapping the noodles around the fork. He lifted it up, placing it into his mouth.
"..."
The room watched with bated breath. Naruto chewed.
Then chewed some more.
He hummed, reaching down to grab another bite. He slowly raised it to his mouth.
"Hurry up! Shirone's running out of air!" Kunou yelled, pointing to Shirone, who took the 'bated breath' literally. Her face was turning blue as she stared at Naruto.
"It's good," Naruto finally said, "Really good."
It couldn't compare to the ramen back home, but it was better than the sub-par place Serafall had found. Naruto turned, looking up at Raynare.
"I love you."
"A-AH! Kami-sama!" Raynare blushed.
"Hey! I helped make it!" Kalawarner said, and Naruto nodded.
"You can live here as long as you want. Just keep making this ramen." With those final words, Naruto inhaled the rest of the ramen in a few seconds.
"More?" He asked.
"Well, if you want more…" Raynare trailed off teasingly, putting her arms under her breasts to push them up, "Maybe you should show us how much you liked it…"
And so, Naruto's harem expanded.
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The Next Day
"F…Finally…" Naruto groaned, dragging his feet as he walked out of his bedroom. After the 'ramen incident' during breakfast yesterday, he'd spent over 24 hours trapped in his bedroom.
"I didn't know my legs could even get this sore anymore…" Naruto sighed as he closed the door behind him. He hadn't felt this sore and exhausted since his academy days.
"Oh, there you are! I've been looking everywhere for you!" Naruto turned his head slowly, spotting a red-haired Super Devil sitting at his kitchen table.
"I've been wanting to take my training to the next level, so let's spar together today, best fri-"
"No." Naruto deadpanned, walking past the man toward the door. His legs already felt like rocks - he wasn't in the mood to go toe-to-toe with the strongest devil alive.
"What?! Why not?" Sirzechs whined.
"I'm, uh… busy that day," Naruto hummed, walking toward the door to leave the kitchen.
"Huh?! Where are you going? Your calendar is all cleared out for today, Naruto-chan!" Yasaka said brightly as she stepped out from his room, bare naked and holding up a calendar. There was a red X on every day except for the current one.
I'm not actually that busy, she just marks off all the 'have sex all day' days.
"Yasaka-sama! You need to put on clothes if another man is here, our bodies are for Kami-sama's eyes only!" Raynare's voice shouted from his bedroom.
"It's fine, you're new here but Sirzechs joins us to watch Kami-sama bang his wife all the time. I believe the human term for it is 'cuck-'"
"Enough of that!" Naruto said, walking over to his bedroom door and closing it quickly. Then he turned back to Sirzechs.
"Anyway… I need to go to the… gym! I'm headed to the gym!" Naruto said, thinking quickly of an excuse.
"Huh? Why would you go to the gym? You're already all-powerful!" Kunou asked cutely as she was looking in the fridge.
"It's for, um… my best friend! My best friend wants to go to the gym, so I'm going to help him train," Naruto nodded.
Man, am I smooth or what?
"B…But, I thought we were best friends!" Sirzechs pouted.
"No, that's a one-way street. I'm your best friend, but you're not mine."
"But you don't have a best friend, Naruto-chan!" Yasaka butted in, shoving open his bedroom door with a confused look on her face, "If you did, I'd know about it. I'd have already launched an investigation into them."
Shit. Curse Yasaka's insane overprotectiveness.
"No, I do, they're um… they're named… Greg!" Naruto said, for some reason 'Greg' was the only name that popped into his head.
"Oh? Him?" Yasaka asked, pointing at the [Youkai Guard] who acted as his personal guard. He was just always standing at the closest door to Naruto, which he found kinda creepy, but it was also his fault for forcefully naming him 'Greg' a few chapters ago.
"Yes! That Greg!"
"Um, Kami-sama, I don't go to the gy-," Greg piped up.
"Shush, Greg! You love the gym!" Naruto said, cutting him off.
Persuasion Check
[Rolling…]
[God's Luck] has added [ERROR]
Your [LEGENDARY] Debuff - [Bad Timing] has deactivated your [God's Luck] Perk!
1!
Check failed!
"Um, no I don't. And I don't think I can be best friends with someone as important as yo-" Greg tried to correct him.
"No, Greg. You're my best friend, and you love going to the gym, right?"
Persuasion Check
[Rolling…]
[God's Luck] has added [ERROR]
Your [LEGENDARY] Debuff - [Bad Timing] has deactivated your [God's Luck] Perk!
1!
Check failed!
"I don't think I d-"
"GREG! You and me are best friends. Longtime best friends. For our whole lives. And you absolutely love going to the gym!" Naruto said as he cut Greg off again, looking slightly crazed as he tried to make his system work.
Persuasion Check
[Rolling…]
[God's Luck] has added +20 to your roll!
20!
Check success!
Greg blinked. His eyes flashed before his eyes. He was the new kid at school - his father had just gotten a new job, and they had to move cities. He was lonely, as none of the other kids wanted to sit with him. They didn't like that he was a giant talking bird. He glanced down, poking at his worm salad with a sigh.
"Hey, man, you alright?" Greg blinked, looking up to see a blonde haired boy in front of him. He had spikey hair, and whiskers that he would never forget.
"Why're you sitting alone?" The boy asked.
"Well, um," Greg cawed, "No one wants to sit with me. Because I'm a bird and all."
"Really?! What jerks!" Naruto scoffed, taking a seat next to him, "Who cares if you're a bird? I think birds are awesome!"
"R-Really? You do?" Greg asked with wide eyes.
"Yup!"
"T-Thanks!" Greg blushed, happy to have made a friend.
"Hey, you know what'll show those jerks?" Naruto asked.
"What?"
"Getting huge! When you have muscles, everyone respects you! They'll be so jealous!"
"R-Really? They will be?"
"Yup! Let's hit the gym after school!"
From that day onwards, they became best friends. Greg shared his worm salad with Naruto at every lunch. They joined their school weightlifting team and became national champions to stick it to the bullies who made fun of Greg. Greg would always have a special place in his heart - both for Naruto, and for hitting the gym.
"You're right, Naruto-chan!" Greg nodded, turning and opening the door behind him, "I almost forgot it was time already!"
Greg couldn't believe he almost missed their gym time. They always went, everyday for the past decade, at exactly 7:47 in the morning.
"Told ya! See you guys later!" Naruto said, happily walking through the door with Greg.
Five minutes later, Naruto would realize that Greg was dead set on going to the gym. He would repeatedly complain that they had to go - they hadn't missed a gym session in over a decade!
So, Naruto decided that fucking a harem of sexy women was more appealing, even with his sore legs, and headed back home. Greg went to the gym alone.
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"Naru-chan," Serafall stared him dead in the eyes, her usually silly demeanor missing, "I have a very important question."
Naruto blinked, looking back at the woman, "...And this is where you want to ask it?"
Naruto swung his miniature golf club, knocking the ball forward into the hole. The 'Youkai God' and 'Devil Ruler' duo were standing in the middle of a mini-golf course as a bunch of human children and families played golf around them.
"Yes!" Serafall puffed out her cheeks, then her gaze turned deathly serious again, "...have you ever played chess?"
"Chess?" Naruto replied, "Never heard of it."
"Good…Good…" Serafall nodded, raising a hand to her mouth as she creepily nibbled on her fingernail, "Never play it, Naru-chan."
"Oh, it's a game? Is it fun?" Naruto asked, looking back at her, "Maybe I'll ask Yasaka about trying-"
"NARU-CHAN!" Serafall stepped forward, her small arms reaching up and grabbing both side of his head as she stared into his eyes, "You must promise me… Naru-chan."
"Wbhat?" Naruto asked as she squished his cheeks together.
"With our friendship on the line, Naru-chan, you must promise that you will never play chess!" Serafall said again, staring up at him with shadows covering her eyes.
"...sure?"
"Good…" Serafall let out a sigh of relief, smiling brightly as she went to swing her own miniature golf club, "My So-tan is safe!"
She swung her club, and the ball launched upward. It soared over the hole… and the gate surrounding the mini golf course. It continued upwards, disappearing into a speck as it hurtled toward the sun.
"Oops!"
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Naruto Uzumaki:
[Youkai God]
Lvl: 505
STR: 762
DEX: 725
CON: 540
INT: 215
WIS: 750
CHA: 999
LUK: 0
Skills: None
Perks: [Martial Arts], [You're a Wizard, Naruto], [Ladies Man], [God's Luck]
Debuffs: [Confusion], [Bad Timing]
Naruto Uzumaki is a Hero from another world, who has been reborn with the power of the Gamer system!
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AN: Thanks for reading! The next 5 chapters can be read at Patreon.com/Koyon !