Surviving Among the Entities

Two weeks had passed since the Munchkin Mary Sue Constellation incident. The threat of annihilation was averted, and people carried on their daily lives unaware such a crisis had even existed.

[So where did that Ilbe troll Constellation go?]
[Dunno? No news since he was running around like a madman doing all sorts of crazy shit last time.]
[Yoyo! The Ilbe troll Constellation’s broadcast and YouTube channels got nuked lol]
[This is the right thing. This is justice.]

Hyung Si-yeol’s issue was also resolved. Or rather, it should have been resolved.

[Ah, boring! Why isn’t the Ilbe troll Constellation making any excuses! Throw more fuel on the fire!]
[The fun event already ended ffs]

Other communities no longer mentioned Hyung Si-yeol’s story. The only place still bringing it up was internet broadcasting communities, but even they were withering and the topic driving community activity had changed.

[This guy is so fucking funny lol Ddwaidde, he can only say ddwaidde but why is it so hilarious lol]
[Oh BJ Ddwaidde? The voice sounded like a girl’s, must be voice mode?]
└[Obviously voice mode, what girl could no-hit clear Dark Souls?]
[He’s really good at games. I should ask him to play League soon.]
[But his persona is brainlet level. Is he doing a low-IQ persona? He’s good at games but some of the shit he does really seems low-IQ.]
└[Ddwaidde~!]

In any case, Hyung Si-yeol’s story was no longer being mentioned. Since I had given him the golden ticket, whatever wish he wrote must have resolved things well.

“Resolver, I’m truly grateful! Thanks to you, things are good again with my girlfriend!”
“I’m glad to hear that.”

Of the remaining tickets, I gave the regular ones to visitors who came to see me.

“But after using the ticket, um, how should I put this, my preferences kind of changed, is that okay?”
“Your preferences changed?”
“Yeah, like I started preferring things fitting for women? My girlfriend became into hitting, you see.”
“That’s an exceedingly normal preference. Masochism and sadism are mainstream paraphilias, and research shows all humans possess both tendencies to some degree.”

Before giving out the tickets, I had provided a few cautions.

“I wished for a job at a top company, but my nephew just put a ‘Home Security Guard’ badge on me.”
“I wrote down ‘Give me 100 billion won’, and someone scattered Burmavable seed bank currency worth 50 million won in front of our house, 200,000 sheets of it.”
“I wished to become the smartest and best-looking person in the world, and a letter came saying ‘To your parents, you are the world’s greatest genius and handsome man.’ Isn’t this mocking me?”

I had reiterated many times that excessive wishes would not be granted and to write realistic, modest wishes, that wishes must be specified concretely – but most people did not follow this.

“Uwahh! I wished not to worry about going bald, but now I’ve lost all my hair! What happened!”
“With no remaining hair, you have no reason to worry about going bald.”

In any case, I distributed all the regular tickets to visitors, leaving just one golden ticket safely stored in a safe.

‘Perhaps I’ll have use for it someday.’

Today was another such peaceful day. After consulting visitors who wanted to go to other worlds and telling them to come back tomorrow, I was leaving the office as usual.

‘Smells nice.’

Passing through a street on the way home, drawn by the aroma of food wafting from restaurants, I decided to eat out and strolled along. At a family restaurant not too crowded but with a suitable number of patrons, I ordered a meal.

“One humbag steak, please.”
“Yes! One humbag steak order received.”

While waiting for the food, I observed my surroundings.

“Happy birthday to you~ Happy birthday to you~ Our beloved Haryul~ Happy birthday to you~”
“Haryul, you need to blow, don’t you?”
“Hoo!”

A couple celebrating their child’s birthday, the child looking happy.

“Ah, I already failed the practice exams, how will I handle the real CSAT exam? There are only a few days left.”
“Hey, there are still 2 weeks! Master one subject every 2 days!”
“I, I guess so?”

High school students worrying about their future.

“Kim Assistant Manager, about this task, do it properly this time.”
“My apologies.”
“Instead of just apologizing every time. Do you know how vexed I am to call you aside like this to talk?”

A boss admonishing and a subordinate fawning.

“Honey, can I have just one bite?”
“You said you were dieting. Eating just salad.”
“Just one bite!”

A couple battling over food, one coveting the other’s dish and defending it – scenes one could see anywhere, and by the time I had finished observing such ordinary landscapes my ordered meal had arrived.

“Please enjoy your meal!”

The humbag steak was delicious. The meat was tender, the juices moist, and the sauce flavor was excellent.

‘I want more.’

Such a tremendous craving welled up that I felt like dumping out my entire wallet’s cash. I wanted to immediately raise my hand and order more, but wiped my mouth with a napkin to suppress the urge.

‘But I can’t do that. This amount is just right.’

My current roughly 60% full stomach was the perfect level until bedtime for remaining active.

At that moment, a commotion broke out.

“Haryul? That’s enough, let mommy finish the rest.”
“No!”
“Ehey! Daddy will eat it then!”
“Wah!”

The child buried their face in the cake. The mother grabbed the child’s nape and flung them away, then greedily shoved the cake into her own mouth. The father did the same, while the discarded child crawled back to the table licking up the food they had spilled on the floor.

“Huff, huff, CSAT or whatever, I wish I could just eat this until I die.”
“Heheh, delicious.”

The high school students kept chugging the drinks they had been sipping. Then putting their mouths to the refill drink machine, they kept operating it to endlessly fill their stomachs.

“Section Chief, this is too delicious!”
“You said it! Hahah, all my anger has melted away! Work or whatever, eating is the best!”

The employee who had been reprimanded and the boss who had scolded them both flung their tableware aside to shovel food into their mouths with both hands.

“What diet? Starving ghosts have good complexions!”
“Well said!”

The couple too buried their snouts into their plates like pigs.

“Anyone need more food?”
“Me!”
“Here!”
“Here! Here!”

To the patrons’ orders, servers brought out huge trays piled high with numerous dishes.

‘Quick.’

Through the briefly opened door, I glimpsed the kitchen. Several chefs were cooking food at lightning pace creating afterimages, while servers kept bustling to bring out dishes.

“Hueck, hueck!”
“Umum!”
“Huruck, huruck!”

No one used tableware. Their mouths were no longer means of communication, only organs for consuming food – they seemed to live solely to eat as they buried their snouts into plates like pigs.

‘No reaction.’

Although the restaurant’s ground floor interior was completely visible through the glass walls from outside, passersby did not react at all to the scene within.

“Hmm.”

At that moment, one person entered the restaurant. A Westerner dressed in a suit with neatly combed blond hair, quite a handsome man.

“Ah, could you be Mr. Seung-hoon Lee?”

He spoke to me.

“Yes, but…”
“Aha! Pleased to meet you. Allow me to introduce myself.”

And he handed me his business card.

[(Co.) Lucifer Company Research and Development Division Head Baалzєввυ8]

“I am Baалzєввυ8, the Head of Lucifer Company’s R&D Division.”

The man politely greeted me before taking a seat opposite.

“You may call me Baal for short.”

“Kueck!”
“Kull!”
“Kueck!”

The restaurant was filled with the cries of pigs. While not an unsanitary establishment, at some point flies had started buzzing about one or two at a time.

“A fine restaurant. Since it’s been so long visiting this dimension, I wondered how things may have changed, but it seems greatly developed.”
“It appears you hadn’t come here in quite some time?”
“Yes, it has been a while. Hmm, what year is it now?”
“The year 2024.”
“Just about that long then. 2024. Ah, could you place an order here?”

A server approached.

“Whawouwouldul yououuu lilikeke tototo ororderderer?”
“A cola, and some french fries, and hmm, will you have anything too Mr. Seung-hoon Lee? I’ll pay.”
“No, I’m quite full already.”
“Then just these please.”
“Ththanankank youuu.”

The server could no longer muster a friendly smile, merely moving mechanically like a serving robot.

“But Mr. Seung-hoon Lee, I have a few questions.”
“What would those be? Since you introduced yourself as the R&D Division Head, you must have come seeking me out for product research and development, but I cannot be of any help.”
“Haha, listening to consumer product evaluations is also part of research and development for better products.”

Baal opened the condiment shakers on the table.

“Our company feels a profound sense of responsibility that you did not fully use the contract but instead resold it midway. Just how dissatisfied must you have been to sell it to a streetwalker with nowhere else to go? This is an unprecedented occurrence in Lucifer Company’s history, so those of us in the upper ranks felt the need to resolve it to ensure it does not happen again.”
“So that’s why you came to directly ask me.”

Throughout the conversation he kept licking his finger and eating from the salt, pepper, chili powder, chicken stock, and so on.

“Correct. Customer, what was it that dissatisfied you enough to discontinue usage?”
“FooFoodood.”
“Thank you. Please leave it here.”

More and more flies buzzed around the restaurant. I saw flies landing on and rubbing their hands together over the food the patrons had buried their heads in to gorge themselves.

“The french fries are delicious. Ah, please continue your story. I’m listening.”

With all the flies facing towards Baal, it seemed like worshippers praying to a deity.

“The reason was one – there was an exploitative clause. That was unsatisfactory so I only used the trial version before giving up.”
“Oh dear, the trial version! I kept telling those marketing bastards to remove it……! Anyway, those marketing guys only know tricks and have no idea about the hardships of the development team!”

A foul stench wafted through. The overpowering reek of urine and feces filled the restaurant, having been created by those very patrons gorging themselves like pigs.

“If there were any other inconveniences you experienced while using it, please share them. I will actively reflect them.”
“An inconvenience, there was one.”

The flies swarmed the patrons for their feast. Thickly clustered around their lower bodies, it almost seemed the flies were trying to cover their privates.

“First, the automatic payment is a violation of consumer rights.”
“But……”
“It may be different in other dimensions, but not here.”
“Hmm, I’ll make a note of it.”
“Second, was this scene your creation?”

He smiled and nodded.

“Yes, since it had been so long visiting this dimension, power automatically entered my body. Isn’t it a pleasant sight? The humans living in our dimension all enjoy it.”
“For the dimension you reside in, perhaps, but forcibly imposing such acts in this place is a crime. A company that does not respect another culture’s norms could never create a proper product, is what comes to mind.”
“Oh, I see……”
“It’s a basic principle of business.”
“I made a mistake.”

Without any prior indication, all the flies inside the restaurant vanished. Simultaneously, all the people regained their senses too.

“Huh? What was I just…….”
“Mommy, I pooped my pants!”
“U, uwaaahh!”
“Kyaahh! What is this! I’m going insane!”

A tremendous commotion erupted, and even people outside pointed and gawked at the interior debauchery. Patrons either fled in a panic or took refuge in the restrooms, servers clutched their heads groaning from migraines, and chefs came stumbling out on wobbly legs shrieking.

“A, an ambulance!”

Amid the uproar, no one paid any mind to Baal and myself.

“I’m truly sorry. Trying to liven things up only ended up causing a disturbance. But there is one thing I’m curious about.”
“What would that be?”
“Customer, did you not experience any gluttony? Then why did you not eat more?”

It was an innocuous question.

“I was satisfied when I had eaten an adequate amount.”
“Why?”
“If I just ate and defecated simply because I wanted to, wouldn’t I be no different from a beast?”
“Still, no one would fault you for it.”

Instead of a cigarette, he put a toothpick in his mouth.

“But I am human, not a beast.”