Slime Breeder

"..." A strange raspy sound wakes me early the next morning.

"Oh. Good morning, Rose." I can sense her frustration and annoyance over the bond. "I know, girl. I know. But, you'll get there. It takes humans years to learn how to talk, after all."

"..." Now, she feels worried.

"Do you want another look?" I offer. "You did keep working on thinning yourself out, right." She nods eagerly and demonstrates by coating my hand in what looks and feels like a thick layer of pink water. "Alright, try coating the inside of my mouth. Maybe if you just flow over everything it won't be so bad."

"..." She tries to say thank you, but nothing but breathing noises come out.

"You're welcome." I smile up at her and part my lips. "Oh, this is so strange. Just let me get used to this much first before you move any further back." It's a little hard to talk with her coating the inside of my mouth with what amounts to a thick layer of mucus, but I know she needs to see this to understand how we talk. "Okay, just take it slow and don't block my airway."

I just lie there and breathe for a moment while trying not to cough; I know that if that happens I'm going to choke and probably barf. But, at least I don't look like I'm sucking on a tentacle again. Her finger is just pressed to the corner of my mouth this time, with her slime flowing out to coat my mouth and down my throat.

"I'm okay." Speaking is difficult, but possible, even if I do sound like I have a cold. "You will have to thin out a lot more if you want anyone else to do this for you though. This is only working for us because you can feel exactly what I'm feeling."

I have to smile as she tries copying my words, she even sounds a bit like me. Everything comes out a bit muddled at first, but she already proved yesterday that she's good at copying movement, and soon improves.

"I've been meaning to bring this up." I say after she finishes. "We're fine with you copying us, but you should probably start thinking about creating a look of your own. This goes for your voice as well; hearing my own words coming from a copy of Maddie's lips is more than a little weird."

She transmits her understanding while repeating my sentences with ever-growing proficiency.

"Maybe we can go into town again later." She perks up at that. "That way you can see and hear more people to help you get an idea of how you want to look and sound. Alright, I'm sorry but I've just about reached my limit." She slowly pulls back out of my mouth and throat. "Ah! Thank you." I finally give way to the coughing fit that I've been holding back.

"Nnh. You alright?" Maddie mumbles when my coughing wakes her.

"I'm fine Mads, just had something stuck in my throat. You go back to sleep." I stroke her hair until she does just that.

"Suh-leee-puh wuh-eeiir-duh." Rosie just said her first words, and brought a huge grin to my face.

"Yes, sleep is weird." I agree with her and slip out of bed so we don't disturb Madison anymore. "But, humans need it or we feel bad. And, it's not all that bad; I know you don't need to, but maybe you should try. Just lie there one night and let your mind drift off, not thinking about anything."

"Mhm." She sends me an 'I don't know about that' kind of feeling over the bond.

"It can't hurt to try." I smile at her and tow her into the main house to get an early start on breakfast. "And, speaking of trying. Let me get a cup of tea, and then we can try again. Just work on thinning yourself out as much as possible in the meantime."

...

"Cole, Maddie? Is that you?" Mom enters the kitchen, rubbing sleep from her eyes a while later. "Why do your voices... Oh, I guess that explains that weird echo I thought I was hearing." She laughs. "Good to see that Rose is picking it up quickly though."

Rosie is back down my throat and copying everything I say while I describe the process of making breakfast and just ramble on about nothing. She sounds like Maddie doing an impression of me now, which is a little better than hearing my voice issue from Maddie's lips.

"Yeah." I nod, almost used to the strange sensation by now. "Someone was impatient and woke me up early to practice. I don't suppose you want to give it a go? As long as you don't think about coughing it's not that bad."

"I think I will pass on that." She shakes her head with a smile and fills a mug with tea. "You look very cute in pink lipstick though."

"Mhm. Where's the tea?" Jen stumbles in looking like she was up late reading again. "Oh, that's you Rosie? I thought you were Madison for a second there. You should probably think about getting your own look soon."

"We already talked about that earlier." I say and Rosie repeats after me. "We're going to go into town later to let her get another look at all the people."

"..." Jen's mouth flies open, and she nearly drops the mug of tea in her hands. "Rosie you can speak!"

"She's copying right now, but she did manage a couple of words on her own earlier." I reply with a proud smile for my slime. "Namely 'sleep weird'."

"Not your typical first words." Mom chortles. "But, they fit someone who doesn't need to sleep perfectly."

"Yeah." I smile and then pat the slime on the arm. "I need another break, Rosie. Why don't you go give Jen the puppy dog eyes until she lets you try with her?" Mom cracks up when Jenny pales at my words and then even more so at the expression that Rosie sends her.

"Pa-lease?" That single word from Rosie is enough to make my little sister cave.

"Argh! Fine." Jen drops into a chair. "You owe me for this, Cole."

"Yeah, yeah." I wave at her over my shoulder while focused on cooking breakfast. "She's getting better all the time, but it's still going to feel weird at first. You'll get used to it pretty quick though."

"Uh-huh. Just do it already, Rose... Wait; copy me first, its too weird having you look like Madison." The slime does as Jen asks and then places a finger next to her mouth. "That feels so weird -ahem- no, it's alright, Rosie." The slime pulled back when she coughed. "You can continue."

"What the?" Katie walks into the kitchen with the twins in tow. "What are you doing?"

"We're..." Jen takes a second to adjust. "We're teaching Rose how to talk. This is definitely not how it's usually done, but it does seem effective."

"No way!" Katie rushes forward and peers into Jen's mouth. "That is so cool. Can I go next?"

"Sure. Rosie, Kaitlyn wants to try." Jennifer looks relieved when the slime pulls back to switch targets. "It's not unbearable, but it is very weird."

"This ain't that bad." She just shrugs it off in typical Katie fashion. "Weird, it's like you're repeating everything I say, Jen. Kaitlyn is the best. Books are stupid. Magic is for dweebs. Real girls swing a sword around."

"Ha-ha." Jennifer rolls her eyes but the rest of us are laughing our asses off, especially the twins.

"Sera and Esra are the best; I want to do everything they say for the next week. Noo!" Katie shouts. I had a feeling what she was about to say and asked Rosie to become her duplicate in the middle of the sentence. "No! Jen said that, not me."

"Nice one." Jenny sends me a thumbs-up.

"She brought it on herself." I chuckle at Katie trying to fight off the twins. "You mind getting this plated up while I go wake Maddie?"

"I've got it." Mom takes over.

"Thanks." I give her a quick hug and pat her baby bump before going to wake up my girlfriend.

...

"So, who wants to come into town with us?" I ask after we finish eating. "Rosie wants to socialize a bit."

"Why don't you take everyone?" Mom says with just a hint of pleading in her eyes. The twins have been extra annoying since finding out they weren't getting their sister back as a slave. "And, maybe leave me Queenie when you go. I could use another massage."

"Heh. You really need to tame one for yourself." I shake my head but send the slime over to Mom's side. "Do whatever she says, Queenie. Be good and we'll go running later." I still have to collect slimes today, after all.

...

"Can we stop in at the seamstress?" Madison asks after Mom sees us off. "I ordered something the other day, and it should be ready by now."

"That's fine." I nod. "I was just planning to wander around anyways, maybe look to see if anyone wants to buy a couple of annoying pests."

""Hey!"" The twins both give me the same indignant response. "Katie said she was going to do what we say for another week." Sera starts. "We just want her to keep her word." And, Esra finishes.

"She was fooling around and you know it." I reach back to bop them both lightly on the head. "Now, be good or I won't buy you any treats. What about you two, do you want to go anywhere in particular?" I ask Jenny and Kaitlyn.

"The Guild." Katie answers right away. "I need to practice for our next duel. And, I want to cash in those cores I got yesterday, so we'll need to go see Jen's girlfriend. Hey, do you think that she can give me a better rate since they're dating?"

"So, you're going to pick on some poor defenseless adventurers?" I shake my head in mock disappointment. "And, probably not; those prices are set by the alchemy guild itself." I add while ignoring Jen's embarrassed blush.

"I know you said she was better than me, but did she really kill that many slimes?" Maddie is staring at the bag full of cores, her eyes filled with shock and self-pity.

"Oh, Maddie." I pat my poor girl consolingly on the back. "Not everyone is suited for the adventurer life. You make a great nanny, and I know Mom is thankful for all the help around the house." She just slumps lower in her seat. "Look, we're at the seamstress."

"Mhm-hmm." She just nods and moves woodenly off the cart once I rein the horse to a stop.

"Hey." I wrap my arms around her from behind and whisper in her ear. "You're forgetting that I don't like adventurers. I wouldn't be with you if you were still one, no matter what you tried."

"Uh, Cole!" Jenny hisses from behind us. I'm about to tell her off, but when I pull back from Maddie I catch sight of someone frozen in the door of the seamstress shop.

"Shit." I curse under my breath.

"Is that her?" At first, I think Maria is asking about Madison, but her gaze is locked onto the pink slime near our feet. "She's so cute."

"Thank you." Rosie creates a mouth to reply and carefully enunciates those two words in Jennifer's voice.

"You can speak!" The slime obsessed healer nearly loses it.

"Maria..." I take a deep breath. "This is Rosie. Rose, this is Maria."

"Hi, Mah-ree-ahh." The slime jiggles over to the apprentice healer. "Why you make Cole feel weir-duh?" Jen, Katie, and even Madison snort at that innocent question.

"It's complicated, Rose." I bend down and pick the slime up in my arms. "She's the one I broke that important promise to." 'Please don't talk about sex.' I add silently over the bond after explaining. "I just wasn't prepared to run into her here."

"Hu-mans weir-duh." The slime laughs then, something I didn't know she could do. "You Mag-ic nice. I like you, Mah-ree-ahh."

"I like you too, Rosie." Maria has a very complicated expression on her face before she looks up at me. "You told her about..." She trails off.

"She asked." I shrug. "Rosie's intelligence and curiosity need to be nurtured... even if it is awkward and embarrassing sometimes."

"Then why you no want me talk sex?" The slime blurts out, making me blush and all the girls, even Maria, laugh.

"Because there are some things you don't talk about in public." I reply through clenched teeth, my face burning while the girls all giggle.

"Hu-mans weir-duh." Rosie grows a head just so she can shake it. The causes everyone's giggles to erupt into full-blown laughter.

"Yes, we are." Maria smiles at the slime in my arms before looking to me again. "C-can I talk to her again later? I have to get these bandages back to my master."

"Rosie is her own person." I reply somewhat noncommittally. "She's free to speak with whomever she chooses to. She is relying on me for vocabulary pretty heavily right now though, so it might be a while before she can carry on a conversation on her own." I say, meaning 'please don't drag me in to be a translator.'

"Okay. Bye, Rosie. It was nice meeting you." She waves good-bye to the slime.

"Bye-bye." The slime waggles a tendril back and forth in parting.

***