Sigrid

Sigrid frowned at Morris’s words and was about to protest but then closed her mouth.

That knight’s duty had killed her, and she didn’t feel like defending it. Morris, who had expected her to rebut as usual, was rather taken aback when Sigrid kept quiet. They were the type of friends who often engaged in such bickering conversations.

“Sigrid?”

“No, you might be right.”

“Sig?!”

As Morris called her name in even more confusion, Sigrid sighed.

“Don’t call me that― No, you can call me that.”

He was the one who believed in her innocence until the end. He even tried to help her escape. So, he had the right to call her that.

“Are you really Sigrid?”

Sigrid looked at him as if he were the strange one and said:

“Do I not seem like the real one?”

“Yeah.”

At his blunt response, Sigrid chuckled. She slowly rubbed her forehead and said:

“I’m a bit confused right now, so can I get some sleep? Lord Deforest?”

“Ah, yeah, sure.”

Morris guided Sigrid to the guest room upstairs. Sigrid said:

“Thank you, Morris.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Morris shrugged and closed the door. Sigrid let out a small sigh and slowly began to undo her hair. Her voluminous silver hair, often praised as pure silver, fell in thick curves. Sigrid stood there for a while, untangling her hair with her fingers.

She was sure her head had been cut off then.

But how did this happen?

Why did she return to exactly five years ago? Is this a dream? A dream after death?

‘Maybe I should meet a magician.’

There are many frauds who call themselves magicians, but real magicians or witches are rare and scarce. Sigrid slowly began to search her memory.

‘Arcana.’

The name soon came to mind. He becomes famous as a magician three years from now, but even now, he must be a magician. Thinking that she should find him, Sigrid started to take off her boots.

‘I can’t sleep.’

Sitting on the bed, Sigrid slowly rubbed the bed sheet with her hand. Her rough hands, calloused by the sword, caught on the smooth bedding.

‘I’ve always envied Morris.’

She hadn’t thought that way before. She didn’t think she envied him, rather she looked down on him for being the second son of a noble family. Yet, she was envious. She envied him for being born a noble.

‘I envied the nobility.’

She wanted to be part of that circle. She desperately tried to be recognized as a knight before being seen as a woman, to be acknowledged by her lord. She aligned all her beliefs and lifestyle with the conduct of a knight. She protected herself by mocking those who didn’t fit in.

‘How foolish.’

After dying once, everything she had done before seemed so foolish. She had put in all that effort, and in the end, it killed her.

“Haah―”

Sighing deeply again, Sigrid lay down on the bed.

‘Come to think of it, I came out without my sword? I must have been quite flustered.’

Touching her empty side, Sigrid stared at the ceiling.

‘Now that I think about it, I wasn’t an Aura user at this time, was I?’

When one reaches the pinnacle of swordsmanship, they become able to use Aura. Three years from now, she became an Aura user and was selected for the Imperial Guard.

Sigrid raised her hand. The Aura Core hadn’t formed yet. But the method was the same. As she swung her hand like a sword, a faint light enveloped her hand but then dissipated, unable to coalesce without a core.

“It works……”

Sigrid clenched her fist tightly. This confirmed that it wasn’t a dream. You can’t do something you’ve experienced or learned in a dream. In other words, she really had returned with her memories intact.

“My goodness.”

She placed her fist on her forehead and squeezed her eyes shut.

‘First, find a magician…….’

And then what?

Is it okay to change the future like this? Sigrid opened her eyes and stared blankly at the ceiling.

“I’ll change it.”

Change her life.

A small doubt of ‘Is that okay?’ and the question ‘Why shouldn’t I?’ arose simultaneously. She didn’t want to climb that guillotine again. She didn’t want to face the accusations and stones. She didn’t want her Aura Core to be excavated, to be whipped, to be branded―

Sigrid covered her face and took deep breaths.

She never wanted to feel that betrayal again.

The people she thought were on her side, who had been kind to her, coldly turned their backs on her. Abandoned her.

Your Majesty the Emperor.

She had sworn loyalty, followed his every command. Yet he condemned her and put her on the guillotine.

Ironically, it was the friends who had left her that tried to help her. The people she had despised.

She’ll change it.

Her life? How?

How can she change her life?

Life is a pattern of behavior, thoughts, and methods. It’s not something that can be changed overnight just by saying “I’ll change it!”

Sigrid spent the night wide awake.

As soon as dawn broke, Sigrid got up. She neatly made the bed, put on her boots, braided her hair, and left the room.

‘Is Morris still sleeping?’

It would be rude to leave the house without saying anything to the host― Sigrid stood in the living room, contemplating what to do. Just then, a maid came in to start her morning chores. The maid was startled to see Sigrid standing in the living room.

“Oh my goodness!”

“Ah, I’m sorry if I startled you. I’m last night’s guest.”

Seeing Sigrid greet her politely, the maid put a hand to her chest in relief. The fact that Sigrid was a knight and a familiar face each played a part.

“I’ll be going now, please tell Morris I left early.”

“Yes, miss.”

Sigrid opened her mouth to correct her, saying she wasn’t a ‘miss’ but ‘Lady Ankertna’, then closed it.

‘Change, change.’

Suppressing a slight feeling of displeasure, Sigrid nodded. As she opened the door and stepped outside, she saw the road still hazy with dawn mist that hadn’t fully lifted. With the end of curfew, bustling sounds were gradually emerging.

Sigrid left the 2nd District and entered the outskirts of the 3rd District where her house was located. By then, it had become completely lively. Bread sellers were going around shouting “5 kerna!” everywhere. There were people buying bread for breakfast, girls calling out to sell flowers, and women selling cookies.

Sigrid was about to buy a steaming hot bread when she realized she didn’t have a single coin on her. She headed straight home. She entered her room, changed from her wrinkled clothes into her uniform, put on her cloak, strapped on her sword, grabbed her registration and some money, and headed to the Knight Order.

The Knight Order was quiet as it was still early morning before roll call. The Knight Order was located inside the Imperial Palace, which, like the capital, was divided into three districts.

The 3rd District where commoners could enter, the 2nd District where only those with titles could enter, and the 1st District where one couldn’t enter without the Emperor’s permission.

The Knight Order was located in the 2nd District.

Knock knock―

At the sound of knocking, Revel, the captain of the 2nd Knight Order, looked up. He checked the clock and said, “Come in.” Wondering ‘Who could it be this early?’, he understood when he saw who entered.

Sigrid Ankertna.

She was a knight he thought ‘If only we could do something about that inflexibility’. He already knew she was always the first to arrive at the Knight Order. Every single day. Where in the world was there such a knight?

“Welcome. What brings you here so early in the morning?”

“I’d like to request a vacation.”

For a moment, Revel thought he had misheard.

“A vacation?”

“Yes. As long as possible, I think quite a few days have accumulated from my unused leave……”

“Well, there would be quite a few. Did you say vacation?”

“Yes.”

Sigrid answered firmly, and Revel stared at her blankly before nodding.

“Alright, how long would you like?”

“As long as you’re willing to allow, sir.”

At those words, Revel looked Sigrid up and down and asked:

“Are you sick? Or is there some business in your hometown?”

“No. I just need some time to focus on my own, is that a problem?”

“Hm? No, no. I see. Well then―”

Revel rubbed his chin. This was the first time Sigrid had requested a vacation, even including her time as a squire. How should he give her the longest paid leave possible?

“How about 45 days of paid leave?”

“Thank you.”

“If you need an extension, let me know in advance. By letter or whatever means.”

“Yes. Thank you, Captain. Then I’ll be on my way.”

After a polite bow, Sigrid left the captain’s office.

45 days―

‘I wonder if this is enough.’

She didn’t know, having never done this before. If it’s not enough, she’ll extend the leave. With that decision, Sigrid sat on a long bench near the training ground.

Closing her eyes and taking deep breaths, she slowly felt the shimmering Aura around her. Then she imagined deeply drawing the Aura into every pore of her body. But that thought soon scattered. At the sound of footsteps, Sigrid’s eyes snapped open.

“Alkerto.”

She muttered very softly, but Alkerto heard it and turned his head. A smile immediately spread across his face.

“Sigrid, first as always.”

Sigrid bit her trembling lips and sprang to her feet. In an instant, she crossed the training ground and stood in front of him, staring intently at Alkerto. Confusion quickly clouded his teal eyes.

“Sigrid? What’s wrong?”

“Alkerto.”

Without realizing it, she grabbed his sleeve like a child, causing Alkerto’s eyes to narrow.

“Sig? Did something happen?”

You’re alive.

Her heart fluttered. So this is what it feels like to see the face of a dead comrade again.

“No, nothing’s wrong.”

Sigrid let go of his sleeve and smiled brightly. But Alkerto wasn’t one to just let it go.

“It’s not nothing. What’s going on?”

“I got a vacation.”

“What?!”

Even Alkerto couldn’t help but be shocked at those words. A vacation? Sigrid Ankertna?

“Are you sick? What happened? Hm?”

“No, I just need some time to sort out my thoughts.”

“But―”

“Alkerto.”

“Yes.”

Seeing Alkerto’s face that seemed to say ‘Tell me anything. I’ll listen,’ Sigrid took a deep breath and said:

“I’m proud of you.”

Alkerto’s face turned completely dumbfounded.

Now? What did she say?

What?

Sigrid?

Seeing Alkerto’s expression, Sigrid burst out laughing. Her laughter threw Alkerto into another panic.

Who is this? What is this?

“We’re both commoners, but you seem to be doing well, and I don’t. To be honest, I’ve been jealous. It probably showed.”

Speaking honestly made her face burn. Alkerto, with his curly blonde hair and teal eyes, was doing very well. He seemed to fit in effortlessly with anyone, and he spoke to her without reservation, but that made her hate him. And envy him.

Revealing her own inferiority complex wasn’t easy, and Sigrid wanted to get away from him even now. But she didn’t want regrets. This was her second life, should she regret this one too?

She really hated that idea.

“But that’s just because I’m narrow-minded.”

When Alkerto died and came back, she was just indifferent. One day, she suddenly realized that no one in the Knight Order was talking to her anymore, and only then did she remember that he had always been the one to speak to her first. The moment she heard the noble children mocking Alkerto’s death, Sigrid was overwhelmed with intense self-loathing. But she couldn’t protest against them. So she pretended to be a noble herself, agreeing with them and then crying when she got back.

“But how should I put it, you’re not like me. This might sound ridiculous to you, but as a fellow commoner, I’m proud of you. Though you probably don’t like being lumped in the same category.”

Sigrid smiled brightly.

“Well, I’ll be going now. Thanks for always talking to me first.”

She gave the knight’s salute, placing her right fist on her chest, and started to walk past him when Alkerto grabbed her wrist.

“Wait!”

“Um, if you have any objections, you can say them now.”

Sigrid shrugged. Alkerto let go of her hand and said, “Ah, geez. That’s not it,” as he ruffled his hair vigorously.

“I’m a bit jealous of you too.”

“What?”

Sigrid’s eyes widened in surprise, and Alkerto grinned.

“I’m a bit of a frivolous guy, so I can’t be the exemplary, disciplined knight like you. It’s like a congenital limitation, you know? But you don’t have that, you’re really the model of a true knight. So I envy you.”

Sigrid stared blankly at him as the words flowed smoothly from his mouth. Soon, heat rushed to her cheeks.

“No, well, I’m not―”

It was something she had desperately wanted to hear, but now that she actually heard it, Sigrid couldn’t have been more embarrassed.

“Th-thank you.”

She barely managed to squeeze out the words through her trembling lips. When she looked up, her own ridiculously red face and expression were perfectly reflected in Alkerto’s wide teal eyes.

“I, I’ll be going now.”

Sigrid turned around as if fleeing and left the training ground at a pace close to a light jog.

The model of a knight.

―I envied you.

Sigrid’s heart pounded. Hearing such words from someone she had been jealous of was on a completely different level from hearing them from a superior or anyone else.

‘Have I changed?’

Had she changed, even a little?

Sigrid pressed both her cheeks. They were hot. Her heart was beating so fast it was painful, but she was happy.

“Ugh―”

The praise was incredibly joyful. It felt good.

“Sigrid?”

She looked up at the voice to see Morris with a face full of bewilderment.

“Ah, Morris. Thank you for last night.”

“No, why didn’t you at least eat breakfast before leaving? Sig? Are you okay?”

“Oh, yes. I’m fine.”

If only this heart would calm down. Sigrid took a deep breath to calm her heartbeat and looked at Morris. Ah, come to think of it.

“Morris.”

“Yeah?”

“That house in the 2nd District, how much is it?”

“Hm? I didn’t buy it, it’s a monthly rent.”

“Monthly rent? How much is it?”

“1500 kerb per month.”

“1500…….”