Shadowflame

So, here's the thing about becoming a superhero: it's not as glamorous as it sounds. Sure, punching Black Adam so hard I broke his jaw was awesome in the moment—like, "Did I seriously just do that?" levels of awesome. Diana wasn't as impressed. Something about "excessive force" and "you can't just punch gods." Whatever. The guy had it coming. But after that little debut, my life got real complicated, real fast.

Now I live at Mount Justice, which used to be a superhero hangout but is now… basically a magical refugee camp. We're talking witches, wizards, Veela, goblins, magical creatures and even dragons. Yes, dragons. That part is cool, but also mildly terrifying. There are thousands of us, all crammed into expandable tents because apparently, no one thought to build actual houses before dragging us into a new dimension. Welcome to wizard planning 101.

The Justice League had to pull some serious strings with the UN to make this whole thing happen. The world's governments weren't exactly thrilled about a bunch of magical weirdos showing up with no passports and a questionable grasp on "don't set things on fire." But thankfully, the goblins rolled in with all the gold from Gringotts—and I mean all of it. They even threw in the confiscated Death Eater vaults to buy us a set of islands to live on. That's right, the goblins bought islands. Say what you will about their customer service, but they know how to close a deal.

Right now, Bill Weasley and his team of curse-breakers are throwing up magical wards all over the place to keep our new home hidden. They're making it unplottable, invisible, and basically as hard to find as a clean sock in my dorm room back at Hogwarts. Meanwhile, King Ragnok and his goblin crew are busy digging tunnels deep into the islands. Apparently, the plan is to make underground cities where we can live comfortably for generations. Sounds a bit like a Tolkien fever dream, but who am I to judge?

And then there's me. Because apparently, juggling superhero duties and helping rebuild a magical civilization wasn't stressful enough, I've decided it's time to catch up on my sixth-year Hogwarts curriculum. You know, studying—the stuff I've been mostly ignoring for most of my life. Brilliant plan, right?

Luckily, I've got Hermione, Daphne Greengrass, and Susan Bones to help me cram. It's like having my own personal tutoring squad—except instead of being patient and encouraging, Hermione mostly just looks at me like she wants to hit me with Hogwarts, A History. I can't blame her. Trying to learn a year's worth of lessons in a few months? Not exactly my finest moment.

Oh, and did I mention I've decided to pick up Runes and Arithmancy? Yeah. Because clearly, I thought, "Hey, why not add two entirely new subjects to my plate?" I skipped them in third year, so now I need to learn four years' worth of material before the next academic year starts. No pressure or anything. But hey, at least I've got my amulet—a sleek little thing in black and gold with a crimson gem in the middle. It holds my armor, lets me cast any spell I want, and generally makes me feel like a badass. Too bad it can't do my homework for me.

Meanwhile, the Hogwarts professors are finally waking up from their suspended animation. Long story short: when Voldemort decided to turn Hogwarts into his personal battlefield, things got ugly fast. McGonagall, Flitwick, Sprout and Hagrid, along with some of the other professors survived, but they're still recovering from their injuries. The healers stuck them in the Draught of Living Death to keep them stable while they made the jump to this dimension. Now that they're awake, they're already talking about setting up classes again. Because, obviously, running a school in the middle of a superhero HQ is totally normal.

We lost Dumbledore, Snape, and Trelawney during the attack, though. I'm still not sure how I feel about that. Mostly, I try not to think about it. There's too much going on to stop and dwell.

So yeah, between superhero training, magical lessons, and trying to build a new life for a few thousand refugees, things are… busy. But it's not all bad. I mean, sure, the world's gone a bit mad, but at least I'm not stuck at Durzkaban anymore. And hey, I punched Black Adam in the face. That's gotta count for something, right?

—

Meanwhile, at Nanda Parbat, Sirius Black—known around here as "The Grimm" because no one had quite caught on that he was, you know, a wizard—was working himself to the bone under the watchful eyes of the League of Assassins' trainers. It felt a little like being stuck in a really intense episode of a reality show, where instead of a cash prize, he was earning a lifetime membership to the world of brooding vigilantes.

"Again!" barked an assassin whose name was as forgettable as the food at a roadside diner. Sirius ducked under a swinging blade, his heart racing. The thrill of danger was still new to him, especially since he was now fully aware that he was a former prisoner of Azkaban with a penchant for turning into a big black dog and maybe—not that he would ever admit it—some latent memory of being a hero. Or a villain. It was hard to tell when you were hanging out with the League.

"Is this a training session or a personal vendetta?" Sirius grumbled, dodging yet another attack. "Because I didn't sign up for this boot camp."

The trainer simply glared at him, his eyes narrowing. "Stop talking. Fight!"

Great. Just great. He thought he was signing up for a workout regimen, not a therapy session. It didn't help that he was still adjusting to the flood of memories that had come rushing back, and only Talia, the daughter of Ra's al Ghul and his unintentional confidante, knew the truth. Meanwhile, Ra's himself had taken a keen interest in Sirius's training, apparently convinced that Sirius's unique abilities would be a perfect asset for the League.

When the training session finally concluded—thankfully, without Sirius being permanently maimed—he stumbled over to a secluded corner of the courtyard, panting like he'd just run a marathon. Talia was waiting for him, looking far too composed for someone who just survived a session of medieval torture disguised as exercise.

"Are you okay?" she asked, her expression a mix of concern and mischief.

"Fine, just training with the world's angriest gym instructor," Sirius replied, wiping sweat from his brow. "You know, the usual."

Talia smirked. "I think you're overreacting. You didn't even cry this time."

"Please, I've been through worse. Like that time I had to eat Kreacher's cooking."

She rolled her eyes playfully, but her tone turned serious. "We need to talk about our plan."

"Is this the part where I get to wear a mask and run away with you?" he joked, but his heart raced with the thought. The truth was, he was desperate to escape, not just the League, but also the tangled web of Ra's al Ghul's manipulations.

Talia nodded. "I've been in touch with Batman."

Sirius blinked. "You mean the guy in the bat costume? The one who doesn't kill people?"

"Yes, that Batman. He's a founding member of the Justice League," Talia explained, watching his confusion with a hint of amusement. "He can help us."

Sirius scratched his head. "Look, I've heard a lot about wizards and magical creatures, but superheroes are a whole different ball game. Are we really trusting someone who dresses like a flying rodent?"

"Trust me, he's more than that," Talia assured him. "He's also fiercely protective of his friends. Just like you."

Sirius's heart warmed at the comparison, but then he shook his head. "And what about Harry? He's my godson, and I want to see him. What if we never get out of here?"

Talia stepped closer, her gaze steady and unwavering. "We will get out. Together. I have feelings for you, Sirius. I'm not leaving this place without you."

Sirius's heart did a little flip. "Feelings? Really? Are you sure it's not just the adrenaline from nearly getting stabbed?"

Talia smiled softly. "It's definitely not just the adrenaline. I promise."

"Okay, then. Let's do it," Sirius said, his determination solidifying. "Let's get out of here and find Harry. He deserves to know his godfather isn't dead."

With a shared glance that could light a fire, they plotted their escape, ready to face whatever challenges awaited them—bat-costumed heroes, the League of Assassins, and perhaps even a few misunderstandings about Sirius's past that they'd rather keep buried. After all, every great adventure begins with a little chaos, right?

—

I stood in the training area at Mount Justice, decked out in my armor—this sleek black suit with gold accents that made me look like a wannabe superhero from a slightly questionable comic book. Seriously, who thought looking like a cross between a knight and a superhuman was a good idea? My chest gleamed with a ruby-red gemstone that pulsed with energy like it was auditioning for a role in a sci-fi movie.

Across from me stood Black Canary, her eyes sparkling with a mix of mischief and determination. I could practically hear the theme music ramping up as she sized me up. "Remember, Harry, this is all about control," she called out, her voice steady like she was giving a TED Talk on how to not accidentally destroy your training partner. "Don't let your powers dictate the fight."

Control. Right. Easy for her to say. I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that I now had the strength of a Phoenix on top of Wonder Woman's abilities. Seriously, I could probably lift a cargo ship—or three—without breaking a sweat. But that didn't mean I could just go around throwing punches like I was in a boxing ring. After all, my last bout with Black Adam ended with me accidentally turning his jaw into an abstract art installation. "No jaw-shattering today, got it!" I quipped back, trying to keep it light even though I felt the weight of my powers like an elephant sitting on my chest.

"Alright, let's go again," Black Canary said, adopting her fighting stance, and I mirrored her with all the grace of a startled gazelle. "This time, think finesse, not force. You've got the strength; now show me some skill."

I nodded, trying to channel my inner martial arts master, focusing on her movements as she launched into a flurry of punches and kicks. I countered, reminding myself like a mantra: "Control, Harry. Control." I slipped in and out, trying to match her speed without, you know, sending her flying into the next dimension.

Then Wonder Woman entered the fray, her gaze sharp and focused. "You can do this, Harry," she said, her voice ringing with encouragement and that no-nonsense vibe she's known for. "Think of it as a game of chess. You want to outmaneuver your opponent, not crush them."

Chess? Great. I was terrible at chess. I could hardly keep my pawns straight, let alone strategize against an assassin. But I got it—outsmart, don't overpower. So, I feinted left, swerved right, and landed a light jab on Black Canary's shoulder instead of the knockout punch I was tempted to unleash. "Like that?" I grinned, sweat trickling down my brow like I was in the middle of a rainstorm.

"Exactly!" she exclaimed, surprise flickering across her face. "Good! Now let's see if you can do it again."

With every round, I felt the rhythm of the fight, like a dance or an epic showdown in a movie. I could hear Wonder Woman's voice echoing in my head, pushing me to find that balance, and the thrill of the challenge ignited something deep within me. Maybe I was a half-blood wizard infused with superhuman strength, but out here in the training arena, I was finally carving out my identity—one punch at a time.

After a few more exchanges, I caught her off guard with a swift spin, and before I knew it, I had her arm. "Ha! Got you!"

"Not bad, but you'll need to be faster than that if you want to take me down," she shot back, grinning like she was a cat toying with a particularly slow mouse.

As we continued sparring, I couldn't shake the exhilaration buzzing through me. Maybe I had the power of a Phoenix and the abilities of a demi-god, but today, it felt like I was doing more than just training. I was becoming something greater—one punch, one lesson, and one surprise jab at a time. Who knew learning to control your strength could be this much fun?

—

Dr. Fate stood in the flickering light of the mystical realm, his golden helm gleaming like a disco ball at a retirement party. He paced back and forth, eyeing Giovanni Zatara, the renowned magician who had this aura of casual coolness, leaning against a stone pillar with his arms crossed. Honestly, Zatara looked like he'd rather be anywhere else—like, say, at a pizza joint enjoying a slice instead of having this serious conversation.

"Giovanni," Fate began, his voice echoing with the kind of weight you usually only hear in a dramatic movie trailer. "I need your help to arrange a meeting with the Justice League. Specifically, I want to meet Shadowflame."

Zatara raised an eyebrow so high it almost disappeared into his hairline, a mix of amusement and skepticism plastered across his face. "You want to meet Harry? You do realize he's just a kid, right? A good kid, but still just a kid."

Fate's eyes sparkled beneath his helm, a flash of impatience creeping in. "That 'kid' possesses powers that could tip the scales of balance between Order and Chaos. He is more than he appears."

Zatara let out a soft chuckle, running a hand through his dark hair like he was trying to untangle a particularly stubborn knot. "Sure, he's powerful," he conceded, "but he's also had a rough time. I've spent weeks with him and the Wizarding refugees from his universe. He's still adjusting to everything. Are you sure he's ready for whatever this 'balance' entails?"

"Harry—Shadowflame—has the potential to surpass even the greatest among us," Fate insisted, his voice rising a notch, sounding like a teacher who was about to give a pop quiz. "His experiences, his lineage, and his resilience make him uniquely qualified for the training I can offer."

Zatara pushed himself off the pillar, mulling over Fate's words like they were a particularly spicy burrito. "Alright, but I know you. You'll throw him into the deep end and expect him to swim. He needs guidance, not just challenges."

"Which is precisely why I need to meet him," Fate replied, his tone softening just a bit. "To understand his mindset, his struggles. I believe that with the right mentorship, he could master his powers and restore the balance we desperately need."

Zatara sighed, a reluctant smile tugging at his lips, like he'd just agreed to take on a stray puppy. "Fine. I'll talk to the League. But if you push him too hard, you'll have to answer to me."

"Agreed," Fate nodded, the burden of his mission heavy on his shoulders, like he was carrying around a ton of bricks. "Now, let's make this happen."

With a shared understanding that resonated like an epic soundtrack in the background, the two men exchanged nods. They knew that what lay ahead wasn't just for Harry, but for the fate of the world itself—a weighty task, indeed, but one they were ready to face together.

---

So, there I was—flying over Jump City with my wings made of literal fire, keeping an eye on things with Robin, Kid Flash, Aqualad, and Speedy. I know, "Shadowflame" sounds a bit dramatic, but trust me, it fits. The armor? Pretty sweet, right? (I mean, if you're going to rock enchanted black and gold metal, you might as well do it properly.)

Robin, the eternal optimist, was chattering over the comms about some new back-formation he'd invented. "Guys, if you can be overwhelmed and underwhelmed, why can't you just be whelmed? Seriously. This is important."

Kid Flash, never one to miss a joke, zipped through an alley below me. "I think I'm whelmed all the time, Rob. But only when I hang out with you."

"Whelmed or not," I cut in, "keep your eyes open. It's quiet. Too quiet."

Aqualad's voice, calm as ever, came through the comms. "We're patrolling. If there is trouble, we will find it. Just be prepared."

Speedy grunted. "I hate it when it's quiet. Feels like we're sidekicks running errands."

Robin snorted. "Don't say the 'S' word, Speedy. You know how that sets you off."

As they bickered, I floated a little higher, scanning the skyline. That's when I saw it—a meteor, burning through the atmosphere, heading straight for the shopping district. Because of course, a peaceful patrol wasn't in the cards for us.

"Uh, guys?" I said, trying not to sound too annoyed. "We've got a meteor. Shopping district. And it's coming in hot—literally. Clear the area. I'll intercept."

"Intercept a meteor?" Kid Flash's disbelief practically oozed through the comms. "Okay, Shadowflame. Sure. While you're at it, maybe you can put out the sun and fight gravity too."

"Magic," I shot back, rolling my eyes. "Just accept it, Kid. It'll save you so much energy."

"I'm telling you, it's gotta be science—"

"Focus, Kid!" Aqualad interrupted. "We have civilians to evacuate."

Robin and the others sped off on their bikes, weaving through traffic as Kid Flash left a trail of dust behind him. Meanwhile, I pumped my wings and shot through the sky toward the incoming meteor.

I could feel the heat radiating off the thing long before I got close. And you'd think being part Phoenix would make me immune to this stuff, but no—still uncomfortably warm. I pushed forward, the flames on my wings flaring brighter as I braced myself to slow the meteor's descent.

All I had to do was catch it, divert it, and keep it from flattening half the shopping district. Simple, right?

Right. Just another day in the life of Shadowflame.

—

I soar through the air, eyes locked on the fiery streak hurtling towards Earth like a bat out of hell. But hey, it's just another Tuesday, right? As the blazing object barrels toward the shopping district, I brace myself, flexing muscles that feel like they could crack mountains—thanks to that whole DNA-splicing thing with Wonder Woman and a Phoenix. Yeah, not your typical wizard problem, but I guess I'm not your typical wizard.

"Shadowflame, you got eyes on that thing?" Robin's voice buzzes in my ear through the comms.

"Yeah, Bird Boy, I see it," I mutter, already pushing myself higher. The heat from the so-called meteor is intense, but I can handle it. I've got the strength of a goddess, the carrying capacity of a magical bird, and the hide of a bloody Basilisk—nothing's getting through me today.

Just as the thing is about to hit, I reach out and catch it mid-air, like some overblown game of Quidditch. The impact vibrates through my arms, but it's manageable. For a second, I'm genuinely impressed with myself—until I realize this isn't just some rock. Nope. It's a ship. An alien ship. Because why would anything ever be simple?

"Uh, guys?" I say, still hovering a few hundred feet in the air, clutching what I now realize is some high-tech extraterrestrial junk. "This isn't a meteor."

"What do you mean, 'not a meteor'?" Kid Flash asks, his voice crackling with disbelief. "It looked pretty meteor-y from down here."

I grunt in response, casting a quick Freezing Charm with my gauntlets to cool the thing down. Flames are one thing, but melted alien tech? That's above my pay grade. As I freeze the outer layer, I feel the fire being absorbed into my wings—Phoenix powers for the win. The flames actually make them grow, which is a pretty neat party trick if I say so myself.

"Trust me," I mutter, starting my slow descent. "Not a meteor."

Carefully, I lower the ship into the empty space Robin, Aqualad, Kid Flash, and Speedy have cleared below, thanks to a last-minute evacuation. Honestly, what would they do without me? Just another day saving the world—again.

"Shadowflame, what the hell is that thing?" Speedy's voice cuts in through the comms, echoing my own confusion.

"Wish I knew," I reply, setting the ship down as gently as possible. "But if I had to guess, we're about to have some very unwelcome guests."

I glance at my teammates as I touch down, my wings still flickering with leftover flames. "So... anyone up for a little intergalactic diplomacy?"

Robin groans through the comms. "Why do you always get us into these situations?"

I smirk. "Because I make them look good."

—

The metal groans under the force as I pry open the side of the alien ship like it's a stubborn tin can. There's a satisfying clang as the hull gives way, and I toss the scrap over my shoulder. Robin, Kid Flash, Aqualad, and Speedy are standing behind me, watching with wide eyes.

"Nice," Robin mutters, arms crossed. "Remind me not to challenge you to arm-wrestling."

I grin, brushing off my gauntlets. "That would be smart."

Then, the ship hisses like an angry cat, and the next thing I know, someone stumbles out—a girl.

And, oh boy, what a girl.

She's gorgeous in a way that makes it really hard to concentrate on anything else. Bright orange skin, fiery-red hair that falls all the way to her waist, and these huge green eyes that seem to glow, like they could see right through me. Her bodysuit—if you could even call it that—hugs her figure in a way that could cause a traffic accident if she walked through Gotham. Dark purple fabric, gold accents, and just enough of a cut to leave nothing to the imagination. Kid Flash is already making that low whistle that tells me exactly how much trouble we're in.

"Hi," I try, raising my hands in what I hope is the universal sign for I come in peace. "Are you okay? Can you understand me?"

The girl tilts her head, looking as confused as I feel, and then—before I can even react—she lunges at me.

And kisses me.

Full. On. The. Mouth.

Now, here's the thing: My first—and only—kiss was with Cho Chang almost a year and a half ago. She was crying, still mourning Cedric, and honestly, the whole thing was wet and awkward and not what teenage me imagined. This? This is a whole other story. It's soft, intense, and leaves me completely stunned. It's like kissing a literal star—warm and electric, and yeah, maybe I'm not complaining.

The kiss lasts long enough that my brain finally kicks in with, Hey, maybe stop enjoying this so much, right when Robin coughs loudly behind me.

"Uh, yeah," Robin says, smirking like he's just won the teasing lottery. "Not to interrupt your... moment or anything, but we've got company."

I pull back, my head spinning, and the girl smiles, looking pleased with herself. I can already tell from the way Robin's eyebrow quirks that this is going to be worse than Showergate—the time I accidentally walked in on Kara while she was showering.

"Who...?" I start, a little breathless, and the girl finally speaks.

"Greetings," she says, her voice regal and melodic but oddly formal. "I am Princess Koriand'r of Tamaran." She pauses, then offers a small, radiant smile. "But you may call me Kori. Or Starfire, if you prefer."

Her English is flawless, but she speaks without contractions, like she learned it from a textbook... or, well, by kissing it out of someone.

"Did you just—" I gesture vaguely toward my lips, still processing.

"Yes." She nods, as if that explains everything. "It is the customary way for my people to acquire new languages. Your Earth tongue is quite curious."

"Right," I mutter. "Of course it is."

Behind me, Kid Flash nudges Aqualad. "So, uh, does she need to kiss all of us to learn more languages? I volunteer as tribute."

Kori doesn't even glance at him, her gaze locked on me like I'm the only person in the room. "I do not require further assistance," she says simply, much to Kid Flash's disappointment. "I have learned all I need from Shadowflame."

Robin stifles a snort. "Looks like she's got a favorite already."

I shoot him a glare, but he's grinning so hard it's like Christmas came early. Meanwhile, Speedy crosses his arms, raising an unimpressed eyebrow. "So… what's the plan? We're just taking in space princesses now?"

"We should probably bring her to the Justice League," Aqualad suggests. "They'll know what to do."

"Yeah," I agree, still trying to wrap my head around everything. Alien princess? Check. Random kiss that unlocks new languages? Check. Trouble? Definitely check.

Robin claps me on the back as we get ready to head out. "C'mon, lover boy. Let's introduce her to the big guys before Wally starts asking for a second kiss."

"I heard that!" Kid Flash yells.

As we take off toward the nearest Zeta Tube, Kori floats beside me, her fiery-red hair streaming behind her like a comet. She looks at me again, smiling softly.

I have no idea what I've just gotten myself into, but one thing's for sure: life just got a lot more interesting.

—

Right, so here I am, escorting Starfire through the Watchtower like it's just another Thursday. On my left, Aqualad is radiating his usual "I'm-too-cool-for-this" vibe, and on my right, well… Starfire is practically glued to my side.

And when I say glued, I mean velcro-levels of clingy. Every five seconds, her arm brushes mine like she's testing to see if I'll spontaneously combust. And every time it happens, she shoots me that look—you know, the one with those huge, green eyes that basically scream "You're mine now." If I had a Galleon for every time she "accidentally" touched me, I'd buy the Chudley Cannons and a new broomstick for every Weasley kid.

"Your armor—it gleams with the brilliance of X'hal's eternal fire," she says, gazing at me like I'm the most fascinating thing she's seen since… well, ever.

"Uh… thanks?" I mumble, trying not to trip over my boots. Look, what am I supposed to say? Oh, yeah, it was custom-made to make me look like a cross between a Greek demigod and a medieval fantasy boss. Just your typical Tuesday.

Honestly, I'm not sure how to handle this whole situation. I mean, what do you even do when an alien princess kisses you, and then spends the next few hours following you around like you're her destined soulmate? Because, yeah, that kiss wasn't exactly subtle.

And if that wasn't bad enough, Kid Flash has been riding me about it non-stop.

"Yo, lover boy!" Wally's voice echoes down the hallway, and a blur of yellow and red zips past us. "How's Starfire? Got the wedding date set yet, or still picking venues?"

Before I can respond, Starfire perks up beside me. "Wedding? Is this a tradition I must prepare for?"

Great. Thanks, Wally.

I shoot him a death glare that basically says, Run fast if you value your life. He just laughs and zooms off, because of course he does. Meanwhile, Starfire is smiling so wide it looks like she just discovered her favorite Earth food. Which, for the record, is mustard. On waffles. Yeah, I don't get it either.

Aqualad clears his throat, ever the responsible adult in the room. "Perhaps you should talk to her. Explain things. Clarify your intentions."

"Oh yeah, great idea," I mutter. "Because awkward conversations are totally my thing."

By the time we reach the conference room, the gossip has spread faster than Fiendfyre in a hayloft. Every hero we pass gives me that look—the one that says, We know. And we're judging you, but we'll pretend we're not.

Even Robin is smirking at me from the doorway like this is the highlight of his month.

"Smooth move, Potter," he whispers as I walk by. "Wally's never gonna let you live this down."

"Brilliant," I grumble. "Just what I need—dating advice from Batman's sidekick."

We step inside, and of course Wonder Woman and Superman are already seated at the table, looking like they're about to discuss world peace or fight an interdimensional crisis. Starfire hovers at my side—literally, because that's just what she does. I try not to stare at how effortlessly she floats.

Before I can say a word, Superman raises an eyebrow. "You're late."

"Yeah, sorry. Got… distracted," I mutter, side-eyeing Starfire, who's now giving Superman a look like she's trying to decide if he's a friend, a foe, or some kind of Kryptonian fashion icon.

And then Robin, the little menace, casually leans against the wall, arms crossed. "By the way, Harry—Miss Martian, Mareena, Kara, and Zatanna all know about 'the kiss.' Thought you'd want a heads-up."

"Oh, fantastic," I say, pinching the bridge of my nose. "Anything else you want to ruin today, or are you done?"

He shrugs, completely unbothered. "Just trying to help."

And because my life can't ever just be normal, Kara—as in Supergirl—walks in right then. And yeah, she's acting weird. Her expression is this confusing mix of curiosity and… something else. Something I'm definitely not equipped to handle.

She walks right up to me, ignoring everyone else in the room, and tilts her head like she's inspecting a very complicated magical artifact. "You kissed her?"

"I didn't—" I start, but she cuts me off.

"She kissed you," she says, like that somehow makes it better.

"Exactly," I sigh. "Glad we've got that sorted."

Kara frowns, like she's working through some kind of algebraic equation. "I… do not understand why this bothers me."

And that, folks, is how I discovered that explaining jealousy to a Kryptonian is about as easy as getting a Niffler to stop stealing shiny things.

"It's, uh…" I glance around, hoping someone—anyone—will step in and save me from this train wreck of a conversation. Superman looks vaguely amused, Wonder Woman is watching with that terrifying mentor expression, and Robin? Yeah, Robin's grinning like the cat that ate the canary.

"Kara," I try again, "it's really not a big deal. It just… happened."

Kara crosses her arms, her expression dead serious. "Is this one of those Earth customs I am supposed to understand?"

Before I can respond, Wonder Woman steps in, thank Merlin. "Kara, we'll discuss this later. Harry—focus."

"Right. Focus." I take a deep breath, trying to gather the shreds of my dignity. One crisis at a time.

Starfire leans in close and whispers, "Do not fret, Harry. I will explain to friend Kara that our kiss was one of destiny."

"Please don't," I whisper back.

And there you have it—my life in a nutshell. I've got a League meeting to survive, a confused Kryptonian who might be jealous, and an alien warrior princess who thinks we're soulmates.

Oh, and somewhere in all of this, Wonder Woman still expects me to master my god-like strength so I don't shatter anyone's jaw again. Because apparently breaking Black Adam's jaw with a single punch was bad.

And to think, I used to think Hogwarts was complicated.

---

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