Scent Of Time

Chapter 57

“Didn’t any of you hear me? All of you get out.” Zhong Xiwu’s voice was as cold and stern as a sharp arrow, piercing through the banquet’s eerie silence.

The Empress Dowager wanted to say something, but when she saw Zhong Xiwu’s gaze, she said the banquet was over. Although the people at the banquet had different expressions, they still got up to leave. The last to go was the Empress Dowager. She passed me and stopped for a moment, and I felt like there were pins and needles on my spine. She said nothing and left immediately, but her footsteps were much heavier.

When the two of us were left in this hall, Zhong Xiwu made a move. He reached out and pulled me, “Don’t kneel. It hurts your knees.”

I shook off his hand, and my voice couldn’t stop shaking, “Are you crazy?”

Zhong Xiwu saw that I was not moving, so he remained squatting. His gaze was waveless. “I am crazy, forced by you.”

I dropped to the ground, and he continued, “I said I would protect Hua Xiang, I would protect your Hua clan. Why do you still pull yourself down like this?”

I didn’t say anything. He held my arms with both hands, the crown’s beads sweeping across my cheeks, cold to the bone.

“You don’t believe me. You never did. Do you know how hard I’ve worked for this? I’ve gone to great lengths to pull people in and pave the way for you so that I can put you in your rightful place today.”

“Take me into the harem?” I asked him, “Does Your Majesty ever care what I think? Do you care if I am willing?”

“Why are you unwilling?” Zhong Xiwu’s hands almost twist my arms off.

“Because I am timid and afraid of things. There are too many people in the Emperor’s harem. There are also many rights and wrongs. If I stand on the opposite side of the imperial power one day, would the Emperor still dare to choose me? I merely want to live humbly from beginning to end,” I said with my eyes closed.

Zhong Xiwu loosened his hand, “Then did you ask me? How do you know that I won’t choose you?”

“Do you still need to ask? Your position affected the entire situation, so why should I still hold out hope?”

“In the end, it’s just that you’re afraid—you’re afraid of trouble, you’re afraid of difficulties, and you’re only not afraid of not having me. My position in your heart is so low that you abandoned me first.” Zhong Xiwu’s tone was full of sadness.

I clenched my hand, looked straight at him, and spoke, “It’s not that I gave up. It’s your own choice. You took the initiative to choose — to keep Noble Consort Qi. I gave you many opportunities, but you always kept quiet.”

Zhong Xiwu’s body stiffened. I pretended not to see and say: “Your method may not be wrong. I know you surely have your difficulties. But Zhong Xiwu, the person who died mistakenly, is my brother. The only one who loves and protects me without asking for anything in return. How can you not even ask and directly want to hide this matter from me?”

I assumed my eyes should be red because I no longer saw the face of the person in front of me. This was good; I could be more ruthless since I couldn’t see his expression.

“Such a you—how can I still believe that you won’t change and choose me in the future? Your power is too big—” I lowered my head and rubbed my eyes, murmuring as if talking to myself, “So, your concern was too much. Your heart may have me now, but an emperor’s heart would have too much burden.”

“Fine, fine, fine ……”

Zhong Xiwu said three ‘fine’ in a row before getting up. His figure seemed staggered: “I have said that all I do is to protect you. It’s fine if you do not believe me, but I also said I will not let you leave.”

Zhong Xiwu lifted his step around me to the outside. I kneeled in the hall motionless, suddenly wanting to laugh. Why was it so difficult to have a simple life in this world?

It wasn’t that I didn’t believe him, but he didn’t understand that he couldn’t do it. I was under house arrest in an unknown palace for the next few days. Zhong Xiwu did not appear, and I now have only one — Yin Xing by my side. She served me as always, and I am too lazy to calculate about the past and only pretend that she didn’t exist.

I didn’t know what Zhong Xiwu wanted to do by locking me like this. I went against his wishes. How should he clean up this mess? Outside the palace, clamor came from time to time. It seemed Noble Consort Qi was looking for me to fight, but with the heavy guard, she could only scream and curse outside daily. Rumor has it that her beautiful face had an unremoved scar. She wanted to attack the Hua Family, but Zhong Xiwu heavily guarded Hua Xiang. She tried to take revenge on me, but there was no way to break in, so it made her mad. For my happiness, Yin Xing told me about Noble Consort Qi’s ugly face, but I did not want to listen. Here, for the first time, I experienced the days as years; after being locked up for ten days, Zhong Xiwu finally showed up. His always warm face was now all gloomy, so one could not bear to look at him more.

I said nothing and sat by myself, pretending I didn’t see. Zhong Xiwu walked to my side. “Qianqian, it’s been ten days. Are you still unwilling to care about me?”

The obvious currying in his tone was heartbreaking. I said coldly, “Your Majesty is joking. As a daughter of a sinful minister, how would I dare?”

He sat beside me as if talking to himself: “Since I can remember, I’ve only seen my grandmother four or five times, and they lived in Jiangnan for a long time. Even when I became the Emperor, she dared not enter the capital at will. Do you know why?”

I turned sideways, not wanting to hear what he said.

He was finally angry: “Do you not care about anything? How about that guard?”

I turned abruptly, his gaze narrowing as if his eyes were stung.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re finally willing to listen to me?” Zhong Xiwu said, still grimacing.

“What did you mean by what you just said?” My heart chilled.

“Do you think there is nothing I can do about it because you’ve lied to him and found someone to watch over him?” He was solemn because there was already killing intent in his eyes, and I saw the bracelet on my hand in my haste. Thinking of Hua Rongzhou’s actions once, I held back the trembling and swiftly removed it, “If you dare to touch him in the slightest, I will ……”

The latter half of the threat could no longer come out of my mouth because he held my hand along with the knife, and the warm liquid flowed through my wrist toward my fingers.

Zhong Xiwu looked at me, his eyes seeming to have a river flowing through them: “You liked royal brother and that lowly boy. Why cannot you like me?”

I wanted to let go, but he was still holding me motionless. The blood flowed increasingly, and I trembled: “Let go ……”

“Today is the fifteenth of the lunar month.” Zhong Xiwu suddenly spoke. He smiled at me with his pale face: “Today is my birthday. I saw you make longevity noodles at the Royal Brother’s Mansion, and I have been thinking about it since. Even if I had thought about it for so long, I still have no chance to eat it today.” He loosened his hand and turned to leave. His footsteps stumble slightly. I fell to the ground like a puddle of mud, and the knife in my hand also quietly fell to the ground, leaving only a palm stained red with blood. It was a trick that consistently only works on people who care about you.

The next day, I heard a clamor outside before I got up. The next thing I saw was that the Empress Dowager had broken in with people. She took down the guards at the door and pulled Yin Xing away. “No need to salute me. I can’t afford it.” The Empress Dowager’s voice was unprecedentedly cold and hard, like when I first arrived here.

I persisted and finished my salute.

She spoke again, “How did you promise me in the beginning? As a result, you are still entangled with the Emperor. Are you take me as a fool?”

I kneeled and spoke, “Can Empress Dowager see it? If I am voluntary, why am I imprisoned here?”

“Yesterday …… Emperor’s injury, did you do it?” Empress Dowager stared at me closely.

“Yes.” My heart was surprisingly calm because I knew the Empress Dowager’s intention. Before I attended the banquet, I knew my result better than anyone else. The Empress Dowager did not say anything for a long time. After a while, she said, “Do you know how the previous dynasty collapsed?”

The book didn’t mention it, so I shook my head. The Empress Dowager inhaled before saying, “The previous Emperor favored his empress too much, gradually causing the empress’s mother’s family to gain power. In the end, the foreign relatives covered the sky with their hands, leading to the people’s discontentment before they unveiled a rebellion to overthrow the dynasty.”

A thought flashed through my heart, but I didn’t dare to think about it. The Empress Dowager did not notice that I was different: “So since the dynasty’s founding, the most taboo thing was relatives disturbing politics. Since I ascended to the throne, my mother’s family moved to Lingnan. An Emperor must not emphasize personal feelings the most because if you want to be a good emperor, you must reserve all your feelings for your subjects.”

I took a deep breath to stabilize my mind, chasing away the thoughts inside my head. It should be that I am overthinking. The Empress Dowager also said that her mother’s family was allowed to return to their hometown.

“His Majesty has understood this since childhood. But he has broken the precept for you repeatedly. I’m afraid this harem will not be at peace if you enter the palace. I know your temperament. I do not want to argue with you, but now his mind is full of you. You hurt him yesterday, but he covered it up. You will have no weakness if you want to sit firmly in that position.” The Empress Dowager whispered. Her tone slightly hesitated, “Do you understand what I mean?”

My heart was lonely, and I forced a smile, “Yes.”

“Then there is no need for me to do it.” The Empress Dowager moved her face sideways, and a small eunuch on the side brought over a tray with a glass of wine on it. I may be crazy, but at this point, I felt proud. I couldn’t wait to run to Zhong Xiwu and say: See? I’m right. No one can protect another person for a lifetime, even the Emperor.

The Empress Dowager spoke, “I reminded you a long time ago. It is you who failed.”

I picked it up, looked at the Empress Dowager, who was avoiding my sight, and said, “I’m ashamed to waste the Empress Dowager’s hard work. I only ask Empress Dowager to save my Hua Family. I have no other words.”

The Empress Dowager was silent for a moment before slowly nodding her head. I closed my eyes and raised my wrist. The cold wine slipped into my abdominal cavity, and a few moments later, the pain gradually spread throughout my body.

First, it hurt; the next thing was that my whole body was numb, and I couldn’t move; the strength of this poisonous wine was too powerful. When my body fell, I seemed to see the Empress Dowager’s watery eyes. She was indeed an old lady who had always been hard-mouthed but soft-hearted. At my last moment of consciousness, I suddenly remembered Hua Rongzhou’s figure riding in front of the palace. Indeed, that was our last meeting. He said he would come to find me if I didn’t come. I am afraid I have to miss the appointment forever. In a blur, I heard the voice of the Empress Dowager, “Quickly, quickly carry her out. Don’t let people bump into her.”

Carry me out? Does she want to throw me to the mass grave? Then, won’t I be too miserable, right? After that, it was darkness without a bit of consciousness. I came here alone, and now I have to leave alone.