Saint, You’re So Vulgar!

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#003 Chapter: Is Sex Embarrassing?

Asher felt an overwhelming urge to cover his ears. How could every word be so chaotic?

However, this wasn’t a situation where he could flee comfortably.

Waking up to find his body swapped overnight?

And as luck would have it, the one whose body he took belonged to the master he was meant to serve starting today.

Asher tried to adopt a stern tone.

Unfortunately, the elegance faded when heard through Bershia’s soft voice.

“Alright! Saintess, let’s stop with those remarks and discuss this seriously!”

“Yes, a plan… um…”

“Do you have any leads on what might have caused this?”

At that, Bershia shrugged her shoulders.

Her demeanor was innocent.

Asher’s expression froze, “Could it really be my responsibility?”

He never thought that this prayer would bring about such results; the only answer he could think of was the prayer from the day before and “It will be fulfilled.”

If he had been a bit more shameless, he could have hidden the fact.

But Asher was not the type to be that thick-skinned.

Most importantly, sharing as much information as possible was necessary.

He thought honesty was the virtue needed at this moment.

A deep sigh escaped him.

Cautiously, pushing aside his embarrassment, he opened his mouth.

“Um, I actually have a guess…!”

“Really?”

“Yes, so…!”

He shut his eyes tight and began to stumble over his words.

This wasn’t going to be easy.

After all, saying “Please let your dangers befall me first. Let us not be far apart,” felt like a confession directed at the very subject himself.

From one perspective, it was essentially a confession.

Of course, it didn’t carry a sexual meaning, and if there were any misunderstandings, Asher planned to clarify them somehow.

“So! That seems to be the case! I’m sorry!”

Having finished his statement, Asher slowly opened his eyes.

What he saw made him exclaim.

“Wow.”

“……”

“A girl… Pff! Sine.”

“Saintess…!”

“No, it’s a compliment. How pure you are.”

Bershia had her mouth covered.

The grin sneaking through her fingers was not a figment of his imagination.

For some reason, feeling a bit annoyed, Asher gave her a disbelieving look, but thankfully she seemed to stop teasing.

“Is that so? Hm, a prayer…”

Her subsequent words were nearly a mumble.

“It’s not that simple to have a prayer answered. We can figure it out in due time…”

She rested her chin on her hand and began to tap the table with the other.

Staring blankly into the air, after some contemplation, she finally spoke.

“…Well, there’s nothing much to know immediately. Then shall we come up with a plan as you suggested? What shall we do now?”

“Of course, we should keep things hidden for the moment!”

Asher was quite enthusiastic.

He felt that finally a constructive conversation was happening.

His voice, dripping with confidence, proclaimed.

“First and foremost, we need to sort out our personal affairs! Let’s postpone all unnecessary appointments! Regarding the relationships we’re bound to confront, it’s essential that we share information with each other! So, about that…!”

“Yes, please go on.”

“Could I get the name of the brown-haired woman who came to wake me… no, wake you, Saintess, this morning? I’m unsure how to approach her…!”

“Oh, that’s Darlin. My servant. If it’s that girl…”

Bershia readily shared several pieces of information.

Asher listened intently.

It was at that moment he realized one thing from her instructions.

‘Is she drawing a line with others…?’

Bershia ordered that she should only give Darlin adequate and authoritative commands.

When cardinal came to pray, she instructed to respond not with words but with a faint smile.

And for the other saintesses… though there was little to share, discouraging any meaningful exchanges and limiting them to minimal work dialogue would suffice.

She assured it was acceptable, and the conviction contained therein indicated how Bershia usually engaged with others.

It seemed a bit distant.

The Bershia he knew treated everyone with compassion.

Perhaps a shadow of dismay crossed her features. Bershia inquired.

“Are you disappointed?”

“Ah, no!”

Asher’s head shot up.

His eyes sparkled as if attempting to have his sincerity recognized.

However, a puzzling silence lingered over Bershia.

It felt like a test.

Asher spoke again.

“That’s not it! Really! I was just thinking you might be lonely… Ah! I’m sorry! How rude of me!”

Startled, Asher covered his mouth and bowed his head.

At that moment, he noticed a strange light in Bershia’s eyes.

Asher couldn’t see her face.

A brief silence followed.

Afterward, Bershia spoke.

“Hm, lonely, you say…”

“I’m sorry….”

“No, it was an interesting perspective. But now it’s my turn, right? I’d like to hear the precautions.”

Slowly, Asher lifted his head at those words.

He felt deflated about his verbal faux pas.

Fortunately, Bershia didn’t seem upset.

On the contrary, she wore a bright smile, and that brought Asher some relief.

“Ah, yes…”

Once Asher calmed his nerves, he thought it over.

There wasn’t much, except for one thing.

“…There’s a colleague named Marvin.”

“A friend, is he?”

“For me, yes.”

“Hmm, that means be cautious in conversations with him.”

That was a rather tricky topic.

After all, until the night before, wasn’t that friend the one slandering Bershia?

Reflecting back, Marvin’s claim that he might have “a dark heart” was, indeed, rather close to the truth.

But let’s set that aside for a moment.

‘I shouldn’t speak ill of the Saintess.’

There’s a significant difference between hearing disparagement indirectly and directly.

Asher knew that well.

He carefully beat around the bush, trying to convey that Marvin was someone deeply caring and worrisome, putting a good spin on it, ultimately hinting that he might speak poorly of Saintess Bershia, wanting her to laugh off any misgivings.

Bershia accepted it.

“Hmm, you have a good friend, it seems.”

That part also didn’t seem to bother her.

At that moment, Asher felt a surge of emotion.

‘She truly is a benevolent person…!’

A person who generously overlooks the faults of others.

She could be this way towards him and even Marvin.

Such a person must have a big heart.

‘So she’s definitely not a bad person!’

This conviction firmly took root as the conversation about that policy came to an end.

“By the way, I have one more question.”

“Oh, yes! Please go ahead!”

“Marvin, my friend, doesn’t just talk about me, right? How should I react to personal matters?”

“Well, that would be….”

Wouldn’t it just suffice to mumble?

He tilted his head, not quite grasping the intent of the question.

Then it happened.

“Why, I’ve heard things too. This is a bit troublesome for me.”

Bershia leaned forward.

Her expression grew more serious than any other moment today.

Naturally, Asher’s expression shifted seriously too.

“What did you hear…?”

Could it be Marvin has some bad rumors circulating?

Or is it maybe that she fears men?

Thud!

In that instant, Asher felt like he had been hit on the back of his head.

Of course! In retrospect, Bershia had never had a guard!

Even this situation only came about because Commander Weill was unable to refuse Asher’s strong request!

‘Fear of men! Yes, that could be…!’

… that thought flared momentarily.

He shouldn’t have worried.

“Do men really just shout ‘I want to have sex’ at every opportunity? Should I ask who they want to do it with? Unless…”

“I don’t! I don’t!!!”

Thud! Asher shot up and screamed.

He was blushing with shame.

He also felt betrayed that the worries he had were completely unfounded.

Bershia blinked.

“Ah, that startled me.”

“Saintess! Will you truly behave like this?”

“What’s wrong? All of a sudden.”

“This… this is too much!”

“What’s too much?”

Bershia tilted her head.

Asher snorted in disbelief, “Ha!”

It dawned on him.

Clearly, something was off with how this person was thinking.

Asher felt a sense of duty to correct this vulgar way of thinking somehow.

Ahem! If he couldn’t tackle this situation properly, wouldn’t his reputation tarnish because of Bershia’s frivolous words and actions?

“Listen carefully, Saintess! You might not sense it if you don’t engage in deep conversations with others, but sexual discussions can be discomforting topics! It is shameful!”

Thank goodness.

This was her garden, which no one could approach without her permission.

Asher then launched into a ten-minute monologue explaining why sexual conversations were shameful.

And he laid down the law.

“Vulgar words and actions are prohibited! Thoughts too! Furthermore, groping my body is forbidden! It’s shameful!!!”

“……”

Asher had poured out his fervor, panting heavily.

Immediately he crossed his arms, glaring at Bershia with a stern, serious expression.

That did not seem to faze her, however; in fact, she looked mildly dissatisfied.

Asher began to worry a bit.

‘Did I press her too hard?’

Even if so, was it rude to adopt such a forceful tone with a superior one should serve?

He pondered but remembered that Bershia wasn’t a person who bound herself by some common sense.

“Are you embarrassed about sex?”

“?”

“Is it not a topic to be proud of?”

“What on earth are you saying…?! It’s obvious!”

Had she been listening to him all along!?

Asher glared back at her as if to express disbelief.

Yet the response he received was this.

“I see.”

Asher’s shoulders quivered.

There was no getting around it.

“You are embarrassed then.”

Her eyes looked at him as though she were viewing something very pitiful and pitiable.

A shiver ran down his spine.

In that moment, Asher instinctively realized something was amiss.

For reasons unknown, he felt something had gone astray; he intended to retract his previous statement.

However, unfortunately, Bershia was quicker on the draw.

“The framework of love and birth planned by your parents is embarrassing to you. You find the eternal and unchanging law of this world, which is perpetually cyclical, to be shameful. And yet you claim to have faith…”

Asher froze.

His pupils trembled as if they were experiencing an earthquake.

His voice came out shaky.

“…Huh?”

He attempted to argue, but his lips just flapped open and shut.

There was no space for him to counter that logic.

His blood ran cold.

Bershia slammed that point home.

“No, it’s alright. You may be embarrassed. But…”

Bershia’s lips curled up slightly.

“…narrow-minded you are. Your faith is.”

Bam—!

A tremendous nail was driven into Asher’s heart.

A person who had been denied life by an idol crumpled to the ground.

Bershia stood up and gently patted Asher’s shoulder.

With a refreshingly bright smile on her face.

“Oh dear, it’s getting dark already. Shall we wrap it up for today? Please reconsider your faith, and have a good sleep for dinner. Alright, then.”

Asher stared vacantly at the empty space where Bershia had just been.

Narrow faith.

That phrase trapped Asher in a quagmire, pushing him past denial and anger, and nearing the stage of compromise… It was only when he lay down in bed before falling asleep that he recalled his rebuttal.

“…No, love and lust are different! A birth without love is not beautiful! That’s preposterous!!!”

Why did rebuttals only come to mind right before sleeping?

Asher trembled with frustration, repeatedly slamming his fists into his pillow.

And so, the first day of the incident flowed by just like that.