Saint, You’re So Vulgar!

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#014 Chapter. Am I Prepared to Become a Mother?

Every day was one where nothing seemed to resolve easily.

Commander Weill’s sudden summons and a private meeting, not to mention Bershia’s training attendance approval given in a moment of emotional weakness, turned Asher’s day into utter chaos.

Who would have thought that Bershia would get the upper hand on me?

Because of that, Asher had to endure her furious harassment in a completely messy manner.

…Though I still question why I had to atone with sexual harassment.

Anyway, that’s how the day passed.

I fell asleep without even realizing how, and when I woke up the next day, I felt utterly drained.

It was the first time since entering the church that I didn’t feel energized even with the morning sun.

With a deep sigh, I burrowed deeper into the blankets, shivering while clutching an extra pillow.

The thought of facing sexual harassment again today made my body tremble with shame.

“I don’t want to get up…!”

Perhaps it was because my heart felt that way; my body seemed sore for some reason.

I felt a backache, and I was lethargic as if my energy had drained away.

Is my heart sick, causing my body to go haywire?

I groaned in this state of weakness.

“Saintess, you must get up!”

Suddenly!

Darlin shamelessly yanked the blankets away.

Asher let out a groan, raising his head.

I shot a scornful glance, but Darlin just smiled brightly, declaring,

“You need to wash up! The sun is already high!”

“…I don’t feel well.”

“It’s when you feel unwell that you must move!”

Darlin slipped his hands under Asher’s armpits and lifted him up with a yank!

Asher’s toes lifted off the ground.

From this angle, I realized Darlin was quite tall. I hadn’t noticed due to his round face.

Or perhaps it was Bershia who was short. Considering the height difference between my original body and Bershia, it’s almost like one and a half heads, isn’t it?

“…This is making me even more depressed.”

Why do I feel this way today?

The thought of having lost my long body suddenly made me feel sad.

Amidst all this, it was ironic that I was also hungry.

My stomach grumbled pitifully.

I hung limply as Darlin helped me wash up.

After changing clothes and sitting in front of the mirror while my hair was tousled, I found this part at least satisfactory. I relished it with my eyes half-closed.

Then I bit into a sandwich that Darlin had made himself.

Of course, that improved mood didn’t last long.

It was thanks to Darlin’s words.

“Did you know? There’s been a lot of chatter about Lord Trevion lately.”

“Huh…?”

“There’s talk that he’s been looking more rugged lately! We often mention it among ourselves!”

Woosh—!

An arrow lodged itself in Asher’s heart!

The wound that Commander Weill had stitched up reopened, doubling the shock!

“Some say it feels wrong and that they’re totally hooked!”

“…!”

…Three times!

“Some say their heart races when he passes by with that languorous look!”

No, four times! Maybe even more!

“…”

Asher’s expression soured.

His shoulders trembled.

From Darlin’s perspective, he probably just wanted to express how commendable his guard was, but the end result was only a reminder of Asher’s masculine defeat!

Darlin thought, ‘Could it be jealousy?’ as he watched Asher’s changing demeanor with sparkling eyes, unaware that the familiarity he had felt towards Asher was swelling.

“Hehe…!”

And so Darlin’s preparations were complete.

She left the room to wash the blankets as usual, and shortly after, Bershia appeared.

“Good morning.”

“Ugh…!”

“Oh, sore muscles. Maybe it’s not so good morning.”

With a smirk full of mischief, Asher glared up at Bershia.

Inside, he shouted,

“How can ruggedness be masculinity! I refuse to accept it!”

Look at that, with her hair neatly arranged, her eyes filled with malice, and her posture all scrunched up.

She was far from a reliable man.

Asher intentionally took a rough bite of the half-eaten sandwich.

He engaged in a silent battle of glare with Bershia, who tilted her head in confusion.

Then she said,

“Why are you so uptight this morning? Is it that time?”

Thud—

Asher dropped the sandwich.

Staring blankly, he looked up at Bershia.

His expression began to turn to revulsion.

Finally, Asher spoke.

“…Saintess, you can’t say that!”

“Huh?”

“That is not teasing; that’s harassment! It’s incredibly disrespectful and thoughtless behavior! Just because I look unwell doesn’t mean you can say such things! You might as well be a lowlife on the street!”

Asher jumped up from his seat.

Yes! Because you’re a woman, you might say such things!

But shouldn’t we be careful when it comes to this topic?

Thinking a serious reprimand was warranted, his face turned more severe than ever.

“Such words are…”

Yet, the words didn’t continue.

“…No, I was genuinely asking. You’re feeling uncomfortable, right?”

“?”

“It’s the end of the month, isn’t it? It’ll be that time soon…”

Bershia rested her chin on her hand, rolling her eyes.

Asher’s expression stiffened.

No, his mind was freezing.

“Are you feeling some aches in your back? Maybe your chest is throbbing.”

His mouth dropped open.

“I’m thinking of all the things I don’t usually eat.”

What on earth was she saying?

“Everything seems wrong, and I don’t want to get up.”

The light faded from Asher’s eyes.

No way, no way…

He was in the middle of thinking.

“…Ah-ha.”

Bershia seemed to have caught on, grinning.

Her eyes drew a line of mischief.

As the decree came down,

“Congratulations on your first period.”

“AAAHHHH!!!”

“Wow, a girl screaming.”

Asher was engulfed in terror…!

*

Asher Trevion, the promising young man of the church.

What he liked was swordsmanship and good deeds, what he dreamed of was being a faithful knight of the deity, and his day started with a light jog followed by a bath; he felt most fulfilled during evening prayers.

An embodiment of the word sincerity, he had never once imagined it.

“Am I prepared to become a mother?”

“…”

The thought that he would actually start menstruating.

The inability to counter Bershia’s words showed just how tremendous the shock was for him.

Asher stared blankly out the window, his focus lost.

His body slumped halfway across the chair.

Bershia tried to rouse him with conversation.

“What’s the big deal? It won’t kill you to go through it. I’m speaking from experience.”

“…”

“Should I try it out too? I wonder if I could do it?”

“…”

It was fruitless.

Bershia’s words barely registered with Asher.

Had she spark some spirit of challenge?

Bershia took a moment to glance him up and down before breaking into a bright smile and saying,

“Want me to teach you how to avoid that?”

“Is there such a method?!”

Asher stood up abruptly.

His eyes gleamed with desperation.

Bershia’s words stirred hope in the atmosphere of the room.

Seeing Asher’s reaction, Bershia broadened her smile and replied,

“Completely stopping isn’t an option, but you can postpone it.”

“Oh, ohhhh!!!”

“About ten months or so?”

“…Oh?”

It took only three seconds for him to comprehend.

Asher blinked, then wailed.

“Aahhhh!!!”

He knelt down.

Tears brimmed in his eyes.

“Just pray for me! If I could only be spared this for now!”

Bershia’s words were just thrown out there.

But sometimes, humans find themselves in situations where they cling to even the most frivolous hopes.

That evening, Asher prayed earnestly to the deity.

“Dear Lord, this trial is far too heavy for a son of parents! My faith is wavering in the face of this unimaginable ordeal, so please take pity and grant me mercy!”

And so Asher was filled with despair.

“…Oh, it’s that time, isn’t it? I’ll bring a new blanket!”

“…”

God was cruel.

*

His stomach churned.

His body felt off in every way; even walking was painful in his calves, and it was hard to manage.

Amidst that pain, Asher wanted more than ever.

“I need to find a way back… quickly.”

Is this what every woman goes through monthly?

It wasn’t easy. If it were just a rough spar, he could bear the pain of being hit, but experiencing these discomfort signals both internally and externally all day long was unbearable.

Thanks to that, his face had grown gaunt.

He stumbled with his stride more than usual.

“Is it really that hard?”

“How can this be endured monthly…!”

“You get used to it. After doing it a couple of times…”

“Before that, I’ll find a way back!”

Asher glared at Bershia with determined eyes.

Bershia looked down at him silently.

Then suddenly, she pulled her collar apart.

Her collarbone came into view.

Asher’s face flushed bright red as he leaped back.

“What, what are you doing! Here in the hallway!”

“Well, it’s that time, so I’m feeling a bit… lusty.”

“There’s no way a man’s body would feel like that!”

“Isn’t it?”

“Oh, seriously!”

Asher reached out and tugged at Bershia’s collar.

He was suddenly afraid of what others might see of her skin.

Thus, they bickered as they headed to the garden.

“Oh my~ What are you doing outside, little bitch?”

A high-pitched voice resonated down the hallway.

Asher froze in shock.

The laughter that followed raised his anxiety.

With more words added,

“Looks like you’ve found a man and are acting all flirty now?”

Asher narrowed his eyes at the blatant provocation.

A woman was approaching, having altered her priestly robes like a banquet dress to reveal her cleavage and legs.

Her hair was as red as blood, eyes slanted upwards, with red irises. Her lips were thin and red, complementing her high nose, evoking the image of a mischievous fox.

Beside her was a blank-faced knight with a bald head that reflected the sunlight.

They were now right in front of him.

Thud, Asher felt a wave of tension wash over him.

And it was only natural.

He hadn’t expected to meet her like this.

“Saint Rubena…!”

Rubena Pradeliri.

One of the four saints recognized by the current Holy Church, known as the graveyard of knights.

She smiled with her lips curled up.

“Oh my, are you all shy? Why the scared face?”