NOVEL NEXT Consultation 49.
Consultation 49.
The instant my next client walked into the room I instinctively desired to flee to some far off land. As for her identity, It was none other than the slutty nympho zombie chick who was unsatisfied by the number of holes in her body.
“God, did you miss me?” A shiver ran down my back.
“Absofuckinglutely not. What the hell sort of depraved shit do you want to find out this time?”
“Well, you see, I ran out of guys. They all died on me after ejaculating to death and I’ve been running on dry recently. I’m missing the feeling of things being jammed inside all my holes and I wanted a more permanent solution to my problem.”
“A more permanent solution, you say?”
“Yeah.”
“What exactly did you have in mind?”
“I have no idea which is why I came to you for your wisdom. Please guide me. Though if you want to let out some of your pent up stress with me before you do that I wouldn’t mind.”
When her gaze lowered toward the desk, her eyeballs fell out of her socket.
What is with this bitch in heat 24/7? Anytime I see her I just feel like I’ve been defiled and can never marry.
“God, why don’t we go a round? I’ve always wanted to know how it would feel if a manly god like you shoved that manly thing of yours into every single one of my holes at one time. As a god, you can do that sort of thing, can’t you?”
“Please stay the fuck away from me. Ten meters at minimum please. Who knows what I’d catch if I stuck it in you.”
“I see you’re still as tough a nut to crack as ever.”
“I don’t know what was wrong with the brains that controlled the nuts you cracked before, but they’re the weird ones, not me.”
“They’re the majority, so logically you’d be the weird one out.”
“Your sample size is obviously filled with bias.”
She rolled her eyes and said, “If you say so.”
How she rolled them while they were out of her eye sockets you may wonder, I’d sure love to know the answer to that too. It was gross to say the least.
“Please put your eyes away. It’s too indecent for my innocent eyes.”
“Put them away? Where do you want me to put them away?”
“Where else is there to put them?”
“Well, I actually discovered a rather pleasurable place to put them.” A perverse smile appeared on her face as she opened her legs up a bit and leaned forward.
Not allowing her to proceed any further, I bit the bullet, latched onto her eyes, and stuffed them back into their sockets.
“What are you doing?”
“Eyeballs belong in their sockets, you goddamn degenerate.”
“Aww, and here I thought I could make a God open his eyes to a whole new world. I was sure not even a god has ever thought or seen this sort of thing before.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about and I’d like to keep it that way.” If only I really didn’t know. Why was there no edit unsee function for memories?
“Anyway, God, let’s get to the heart of the matter. What do you suggest I do about my problem? I need something out of this world that can satisfy my unquenchable thirst.”
“Okay, I get it. I’ll tell you how to solve that problem of yours as long as you promise to immediately gtfo after I tell you.”
“Sure.”
“The answer is pretty simple, you just need tentacle monster eggs.”
Her ears perked up when she heard my suggestion. “Tentacle monster? What a lovely sounding little monster. Why have I never heard of such a wonderful monster before and where do I find one?”
“You were probably too busy taking dicks to hear about them, but they do exist in your world.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. All you need to do is create a chimera via alchemy by transmuting an octopus, a zombie starfish, and a Mexican axolotl together. Get it to lay eggs inside your womb and they will grow larger and expand over the course of three months. After those three months, the eggs will hatch inside your body and turn into the tentacle monster baby of your dreams. It will satisfy you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week from then on. All those extra holes of yours, including your internal organs will be wriggling and bloated with endless tentacles, stimulated till kingdom come with this handy little creature’s assistance ”
“That sounds absolutely divine. Why couldn’t you have told me about this wonderful creature sooner?”
“Forget that, I gave you what you wanted. Now please leave. If I’m in the same room as you any longer I fear other gods will think I’m seriously into degenerate freaks like you. I don’t want any strange rumors to spread.”
”Yeah, yeah. I get it. I get it. I’m going. Sheesh. I wouldn’t even mind if those sorts of strange rumors spread though. Maybe another god would take an interest and want to try reaching nirvana while treating my body like a sex toy.””
I can only pray I never encounter such a degenerate god. ever.
