Reaver’s Song

“Huh?” I blinked at the countess as she walked past me toward the campfire I’d first found her at. She turned slightly and grinned at me in a very un-Carrisyn way. “Wait! What the hell? Are you serious? I’m married, now?” I found myself trotting to catch up with her, her much longer legs quickly leaving me behind.

“I said I would solve the problem of what to do about your responsibility to the elves, didn’t I? Well, I did,” Carrisyn shrugged, taking her seat back. “Aren’t I wonderful?”

“No, that’s not wonderful at all,” I shook my head emphatically. “You can’t just marry me off like some piece of meat! I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to be seen as a piece of meat from time to time. I mean, depending on who was looking and how well they were going to eat me, but just tossing me into some marriage ceremony I didn’t know I was participating in was not what I had in mind.”

“I suppose you can always tell them it was a mistake, and you aren’t interested in the arrangement,” Carrisyn sighed in mock sadness, gesturing with her head to the elves celebrating and congratulating Lyrei and Alyndra, many of them dancing and some even weeping.

“You’re a sadist,” I muttered. “Wait! I didn’t marry Alyndra, too, did I? This isn’t some poly romantic arrangement, right? She’s far too young. I guess I’m young, too, so it’s not that big of a deal I suppose but that would be kind of odd. I’m not saying that in a few years it couldn’t happen but…” I trailed off, chewing my bottom lip nervously.

“No, you adopted her,” Carrisyn picked up her cup and took a sip of whatever was inside.

“Hah?” I shot her a confused look, cocking my head to the side.

“You needed not only a co-ruler, but also an heir. She had her family taken from her and now she’s royalty with a mother that will love her and care for her and keep her safe. She also has you, too, I suppose,” Carrisyn shrugged. “Nothing’s perfect, though.”

“Did you just insult me?” I demanded.

“Yes.”

“Rude!” I gasped.

“You can’t even keep yourself from harm, how are you going to keep someone else safe? What I said was true, was it not?”

“Yeah, well,” I was forced to concede her point, “just because you can say something doesn’t mean you should say something. It’s a societal norm. Like, for instance, I could call you an emotionally bankrupt sociopath with the warmth and humanity of tundra grass but that doesn’t mean I should.” I snickered at her, bringing my hand to cover my mouth in mock embarrassment. “Oopsy!”

“Friend Ashvallen!” Sayuri’s voice interrupted. I turned toward the sound to find myself pressed into the soft cushion of the catgirl’s breasts as she hugged me tightly, shaking me back and forth excitedly like a rag doll. “You did not tell Sayuri you were getting married! Sayuri is so happy for you!”

“I didn’t know, either” I managed, my face crushed against her light pink nipple. Thank you, god, I thought. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I couldn’t catch my breath but, all in all, it seemed like a pretty decent way to die, and I was grateful for it.

“You should let her go, Sayuri,” Carrisyn’s voice instructed. I wanted to tell Carrisyn it was fine, but I was, literally at this point, unable to breathe. “You’re suffocating her.”

“Oh! Oh! Sayuri is so sorry!” She let me free, and I dragged in a deep breath of cold air, my lungs satisfied, the rest of my body feeling rather bereft. Sayuri petted my head apologetically, smoothing out my hair as much as she could.

“It’s quite all right,” I managed through ragged gasps, meaning every word.

“Sayuri brought a present for the wedding! It is not big since I did not have that much time, but I think you will find it to be a fun gift!”

“Thank you, Sayuri!” I cried, jumping in, and hugging her again, thrilling at the touch of her warm skin. “You are so sweet!” I let go and stepped back a pace. She brought her closed right hand up, her face a mask of glee.

“It’s a bird!” Sayuri opened her palm to expose the lifeless creature. I blinked at the bird, then glanced back up to Sayuri’s proud face. “It may have gotten a little squished.”

“Thank you!” I enthused hollowly. She was definitely at least half cat, I thought as I took the bird from her hand gingerly.

“You can eat it!” Sayuri glanced down at the bird then up at me expectantly, her large heterochromatic eyes blinking eagerly.

“Ahh, yeah,” I fumbled, trying to find the right words for ‘no’ that didn’t sound like ‘no’. I ignored the countess’ muffled chuckling from behind me. “I had a pre-wedding dinner so I’m full right now. Maybe later, though…”

“You got dinner? I wanted a pre-wedding dinner!” Sayuri slumped dejectedly.

“W-Well, do you want this bird?” I asked, offering the limp thing dangling from between my fingers.

“But Sayuri got that for Ashvallen, though,” Sayuri eyed the bird hungrily. “It wouldn’t be right to eat a present.”

“You see,” I lied, “in my culture its tradition for the wife or husband to give gifts to the guests of the wedding so consider this my gift to you. It’s so sweet of you to give me this that I feel it’s only right to give it back.”

“Is Ashvallen sure?” Sayuri stared at the bird with hungry eyes, and I shuddered a little.

“Most definitely.”

“Okiethankyoubye!” Sayuri exclaimed all at once, grabbing the dangling corpse from my fingers and rushing off into the night.

“Why is she naked?” I asked, watching her vanish into the darkness. “Not that I’m complaining. Just curious.”

“Because she’s an idiot. Speaking of idiots, you are the worst bullshitter in the history of bullshitters,” the countess chuckled. “It’s Sayuri. You could have just told her the truth about how you didn’t want her dead bird. You didn’t have to make up that whole elaborate story.”

“Well,” I sniped, turning back toward the fire, and scowling at the giggling woman, “unlike some people I care about others’ feelings.”

“Yeah…nice try but I’m not buying it.”

“I’m still not sure how marrying me off solves the problem with the elves,” I shook my head, sitting across the fire from the former countess and letting the warmth of the flames push away the chill of the high plateau night.

“That’s simple,” Carrisyn’s face beamed with smug confidence. “Now Lyrei and Alyndra take the elves north to Esterwyn and out of Rhade’s grasp with the full weight of royal authority to lead and make decisions. Princess Lysabel has already arranged a place to regroup and get their feet under them. Which frees us up to take care of the business of getting back home.”

“Princess Lysabel is…I don’t know who that is,” I finally admitted.

“The girl in the cloak?” Carrisyn prompted. I blinked at her. “She’s been with us since the prison…”She rolled her hands over a few times as if to prompt me.

“Oh!” Recognition finally kicked in and I nodded. “Caped grenade girl. Got it. To be fair, there’s so much royalty around here it’s hard to keep them all straight. Why’s she helping us, anyway?”

“She hates Rhade and everything the nation stands for, especially the King and her sadistic fiancé Prince Galen. Helping the elves not only hurts Rhade but helps Esterwyn.”

“So the enemy of my enemy is my friend type of thing?” I scowled. “Are you sure the Elves aren’t just walking into the same situation with different trees?”

“Esterwyn has a small elf population, but they’re all free. I promise Lysabel can be trusted. She’s been my contact inside the palace since shortly after she came to Arkbridge. Obviously, that’s all changed, but I’d trust her with my life. The elves will be safe. I promise.”

“And what are we doing to get back home, then?”

“The next step is to get the books and instructions I need from the Tower of the Moon,” Carrisyn replied. “From there we’ll head to the Elven war capital and get the sword.”

“Wait! We’re still acting as Galen’s messenger girls?” I gaped at her.

“I never said I’d be giving it to him,” Carrisyn grinned. “There is another interested party who can make use of that blade. In return, I get to the use of a powerful chamber imbued with magic and bring us back to our own world. You should be back teaching about the Gutenberg Bible within a month and a half.”

“A…month and a half?” I moaned. I did the math in my head again and buried my head in my hands. “Fuck. I’m totally going to be fired. I’ve only got like 2 weeks before classes start up again.”

“Maybe they’ll hold your job for you?” Carrisyn suggested.

“Would you hold a job for someone who just didn’t show up?” I shook my head back and forth miserably. “It took forever for me to get that job, too. Do you think you can use magic to let me get in touch with Eun-Ha and tell her to call in sick for me?”

“My magic is not an iPhone 6, you know,” Carrisyn scowled.

“I figured as much,” I nodded. “And, just so you know, iPhone is up to, like 14, now.” Well, I’m sure there were plenty of other jobs available for someone of my qualifications. I sighed. I tried my best to interject a bit of relativity by reminding myself that getting fired wasn’t nearly as bad as, literally, everything that had happened since I came to this shithole, but it was cold comfort.

“Seriously?” Carrisyn shook her head in wonder. I nodded glumly. “Wow.”

I turned at the sound of a group of people passing behind me. Lyrei was talking to her generals and the caped princess earnestly. She noticed my gaze and smiled broadly, waving at me. I watched her until she vanished into the darkness before something occurred to me, immediately drawing me out of my melancholy. I turned quickly to Carrisyn, excitement in my eyes.

“I just realized something!” I enthused. “I need a tent!”

“We’ll be breaking camp soon since dawn’s in two hours. It makes no sense to sleep, now. Besides, you’re an elf, you don’t need to sleep that much. You’ll have to wait until tonight.”

“You don’t understand! I’m married!” Carrisyn cocked an eyebrow at me. “I need to consummate the marriage! I need a tent!”

“Yeah, that won’t be happening,” Carrisyn huffed, an odd look on her face I hadn’t seen before. One I couldn’t quite place.

“But I want to,” I whined. Carrisyn got to her feet and came around the campfire to sit beside me.  

“Are you sure you want to?” Her hip pressed against the side of my own and I stared at her, centimeters away from me once again. I turned to her, her eyes staring deep into my own.

“Y-Yes,” I replied, suddenly not nearly as convinced as before. Carrisyn’s face drew closer to me, her cheek brushing against mine. Her nose nuzzled into my hair, and I felt her breath on my ear. A thrill rushed down my spine, leaving my body tingling.

Carrisyn’s tongue flicked out and ran along the edge of my ear. I whimpered in surprise and excitement, the tingling of my body seeming to center itself at the apex of my thighs. I felt Carrisyn’s arm brush against my breasts and my nipples, already hard from the feeling of her breath, stiffened into peaks, aching tantalizingly. Her fingers brushed over my bare midriff. My body, already taut from desire quivered at her touch, making me uncomfortably wet immediately.

“Are you really sure?” Carrisyn purred, the tip of her tongue tracing the lines of my ear.

“B-But I’m married,” I whispered, my mind mostly blank from desire and anticipation. I clenched and unclenched my thighs to try to assuage the sudden aching need between my legs. Carrisyn’s hair brushed against my cheek and her tongue dipped into my ear. I moaned deep in my throat.

“One of convenience only,” Carrisyn’s voice was low and throaty and vibrated deep in the center of my belly like a wild beast unleashed. “Besides, maybe I like married women.”

“Ohhh,” I groaned. “Y-you’re very naughty.”

“So, I’ll ask again, are you really sure?” Carrisyn took my earlobe between her teeth and sucked it gently into her mouth, running her tongue over my skin until I wanted to melt. My brain had short circuited and was completely barren except for her warmth and closeness and my body’s desperate need for more.

“Ugah?” I managed my breathing sharp and labored.

“Rhade is coming! Rhade is coming!” Cries erupted from the far end of the plateau.

“Looks like we’ll have to continue this at some other time,” Carrisyn groaned. I turned to her blankly, still not sure what was going on, my body lost in the sensation of her skin on mine and the sudden absence of said feeling. She bent forward, head dipping until her lips brushed against mine. “And we will.”

“Oh, God fucking dammit,” I breathed, on the edge of tears as Carrisyn got to her feet and moved off to take a look. I had no idea what had just happened, but I knew for a fact I hadn’t wanted it to stop.