Real Waifu Catalog: Warcraft Beta Tester

Chapter 29: Worth?



4/29 morning

I got back to Darcell fairly late, but she wasn't upset. Apparently she'd spent the time trying to figure out how her collar's various functions worked. She was excited to tell me about the map when I got back, so I let her before laying down for bed. Apparently she'd been able to see me in Northshire Abbey through the map. Sure enough, there was an icon indicating the positions of each piece of Jewelry. I hadn't really thought about the implications, but having it pointed out so enthusiastically really got me thinking about how useful this would be, especially once my team was more than 4 people.

Drusilla quietly slipped in when we were already asleep, and curled up next to me as quietly as she could manage. I assume anyway; she didn't wake me up but she was there in the morning. As agreed, we didn't discuss anything that had happened directly.

"So, will we be setting out alone or with allies?" I asked. I was trying to be tactful.

"Why yes. Watcher Hutchins was kind enough to offer to accompany us with his partner all the way to Raven Hill. I presume that he intends to keep his word, given that this appeared nestled among Northshire's finest this morning." She withdrew a small stoppered bottle of a dirty looking grey liquid and presented it to me. It had lines like a measuring cup running up the side, twenty three of them. "I wish we had an alchemist; I know it's not from here, but they tend to be able to get a sense for what potions do. The lines imply that dosage matters, no?"

"Yeah. I guess they do. Unfortunately we are probably going to have to just guess and experiment. That's fine. We have a whole week for that kind of thing. Huh, actually, can you tell what this does?" I pulled out my arcane orb.

"Hmm?" Drusilla looked it over. "It looks like a simple mana condenser. I'm not much of an enchanter but it seems like it accumulates mana. Holding it would likely speed recovery slightly, too. You didn't know?"

"More that I don't know how you know."

"It's in the aura. Fairly simple to read with a minor enchantment like this, really."

"Can you examine this thing's aura?" I pulled out the orb of entrancement, a simple glass sphere, firmly willing it to not activate prematurely. The warlock looked it over for a moment, and I carefully watched what she was doing. There was a simple spell involved to see the aura, but copying that is all the insight soul talent gave me. Maybe this fell under science talent, or engineering?

"It's odd. I don't see most of it, but I can tell you it is soulbound. Once it is used on or by someone, it won't work for anyone else." Single target then, just like the stamp. If my suspicions are right, the tantric rod I'll get once Keryn gets fired will probably be good for a single ritual. I can work with this.

"Alright. You said you aren't a very good enchanter; should we get a better one into the team?"

"Certainly. Along with a hundred other specialties, of course. You must admit this operation is a bit slapdash so far. But yes, if our rituals involve depositing strange and powerful magical items into our laps we may want to prioritize an enchanter who can properly analyze them."

We dressed ourselves, I put on Otto's face again, and we had a few boiled giant spider legs for breakfast. They were surprisingly good, a lot like crab legs. Probably would have been better with some butter or seasoning, of course. Apparently there was a real problem with giant spiders around these parts, so hunters brought them in all the time. The abdomen usually had poison in it, but the legs were good eating. I checked missions, of course.

Pull a Prometheus

Steal watcher Royce's enchanted torch. She must not realize you did this.

Reward: Mission Ticket

I sighed. Probably not worth the trouble. I really didn't want to make an enemy of the Night Watch, and I was at best a gifted amateur when it came to theft. I'll save my daily swap for tonight, no use getting another mission in Darkshire that just wasn't worth the trouble. On the other hand, let's see about the Regional Mission, eh?

Duskwood

Target: Morbent Fel, Necromancer of Raven Hill Cemetary.

Reward Shroud of shadows

Hold it. There were two of them there? What else did I forget? I only really had a plan in place to take down Abercrombie. If his neighbor came over asking for a cup of eye of newt in the middle of the process, I might be fucked. Well, I guess I'll just need to deal with them one at a time. Whichever I encounter first will be my priority, and if I can't keep them separated I bug out. This got a lot riskier, but I'm committed. Best to just wing it; Abercrombie likes to play the friendly old man if I remember right, hopefully that means he and Fel don't visit each other often.

My amulet for the day was a huge gold and sapphire monstrosity of interlocking plates, enough to cover around a third of the chest. At this rate I wanted the bonus from Blackrock and Roll just in case the bracelet versions of some of these came out less gaudy. This would only look good with a fairly narrow range of aesthetics, like ballroom gowns. I really doubted I'd be able to trick anyone into putting this thing on, and I didn't want it for myself. Hopefully I'd capture someone pretentious enough to want it.

••••••••••

Lividia realized the flaw in her plan, now. Humans were patriarchal. Most of their nations had kings in charge instead of queens. Human Queens were servile consorts, meant to lay eggs and support the king. So if she wanted to rule as a queen, she would need to find a sufficiently impressive male to partner with.

Were any humans sufficiently impressive? That was the real question. He'd need to be powerful, intelligent, physically strong and large, magically gifted, and commanding. Anything short of that would be utterly impossible for her to take seriously as a mate, even as a smoke screen. After devouring a nice cow donated generously (if unknowingly) by a local farmer, Lividia resumed her human form, sat on a rock, and started figuring out what her requirements were. They started out substantial but she kept paring it down to the most important bits. It was a surprisingly fun way to spend her time.

••••••••••

Watchers Hutchins and Merant were there to meet us at the southern gate. Hutchins was a tall man with long black braids and a full beard. He gave off a distinct viking vibe and winked at Drusilla when he saw her approaching. I instantly disliked him for entirely rational reasons.

Merant was a bit short, muscular for a woman, had no figure to speak of, and her face was nothing to write home about. When my first thought looking at her was that she looked like a great opportunity to fiddle with the body control runes on my jewelry to make her hotter, I stopped myself short. That really shouldn't be my first thought. Women, even ones I'd brainwashed into sex slavery, were not just my playthings. They were also useful tools, and probably still people, too. She would obviously be worth capturing primarily because she is a combat veteran in this hellhole. I'm gonna be level with you. I'm pretty sure I'm a terrible person.

The trip was almost disappointingly simple, even boring, given the effort we had put into preparing. It was dark and foggy, but we had two watchmen guarding our flanks. They were wary, but relaxed enough to make small talk.

"Oh yeah. Don't travel at night, but as long as you stay alert and on the road there's a good chance nothing will happen. Even if it does, it usually won't be a whole war band. Most undead kind of go torpid during the day unless something gets them riled up." Watcher Hutchins seemed to be fairly chatty, showing off his extensive knowledge of Duskwood to Drusilla and Darcell. Both were polite but quiet, in a way that I wouldn't have recognized as communicating mild disdain in my old life. Communication talent: making me not an awkward nerd since about a week ago.

"So we will be stopping at the camp at the crossroads. We have a nice little barricaded outpost where the road forks there. It'll only take a few more hours to get to Raven Hill in the morning, but traveling near dusk is against policy. We lose too many people that way." Losing another day was annoying, but I didn't want to push it.

We ran into a grand total of one ghoul wandering too close to the road, but between the five of us it was down almost instantly. It was a lot more creepy and disgusting in real person than on screen, that's for sure. I remembered that ghouls were essentially zombies that had undergone a Pokémon style evolution after absorbing enough ambient death magic. Their hands extended into filthy bone claws, their jaws extended and teeth enlarged, and their arms and legs seemed to have stretched out and ripped, revealing bone.

Quite frankly, at this point I wanted to do the Abercrombie mission just so that I could see how half of these things could be transformed to be remotely attractive.

The fortified camp was nothing amazing, just a rough log palisade, but I could definitely see why someone would want some decent walls set up to sleep behind if ghouls were more active at night. A few watchers inside opened up the gates and let us in.

I swiped left on the current mission. This might count as a settlement, so I could get a minor mission set around here.

Eight Legged Menaces

Assist Watcher Dodds in reducing the surplus spider population by killing 20 venom web Spiders.

Reward: 1 dose of paralytic poison, skill upload: sword and torch fighting

Yep. This one is happening. If "skill upload" means what I think it does, I'd instantly learn that fighting style. It's no Martial Talent, but having even one fighting style that I wasn't shit with would make me a lot safer in a fight. Sword and Torch seemed niche, probably only really great against things that are afraid of fire, but it's better than "hit it with a big stick and desperately block."

I guess I'm going to be hunting spiders this week. Good thing I gave everyone resistance to poison. I'd done it as a long-in-advance precaution against the plague of undeath scheduled in a couple years, but this is good too.

I casually brought up the spider population to Dodds, a tall man with an eye patch and short brown hair, and he told me there was actually a bounty on them. The watch is too undermanned to patrol anywhere but the roads, but the spiders were taking over the woods and quickly depleting the game population. Jackpot. I'm not going to question why the company decided to give me a fairly standard mmo kill quest, especially when he offered me a pair of magical gauntlets that used to belong to a fellow watcher if I brought him fifteen sets of fangs. Things were looking pretty good today.


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