Re: Goblin Slayer

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***

I'd be stripped naked in a heartbeat. Give them a chance, and I'd be flaunting my clothes off and probably lying with a dagger up my arse. Well, why not? I'm green, almost a goblin in the flesh. Well, that's just my guess, and the masochistic thoughts of my sick mind....

And so, I said that I had already healed my wound and I didn't need help - the girls even seemed to believe me, finally removing their gentle and at the same time so strong hands. But I could see in their gazes that if I let them, I would be as bare-assed as the goblins I had recently met. But it's my imagination again, or not... I don't know, I can't see anything now, except incomprehensible images.

It's like I'm high on something. The pain in my eyes was gone, but my sight was not coming back, which made me very sad. In my mind I already considered myself an invalid, and the thought that my eyes, having burned out then, would remain like that forever, was the only thing that came to my mind.

I don't understand these skills. I feel varying degrees of pain every time, during certain... um... moments of evolution. So why nothing like this now? Is it over?

It's okay. It's just a story. A pathetic attempt to keep my brain occupied with some thoughts, even if only for a while, so I don't go into a full-blown panic. Otherwise...' I imagined myself running around screaming in a wild bass voice, 'I can't see anything!

Of course, one could think that I was exaggerating and my thoughts were just the ravings of a frightened individual....

But... now I'm calm... to some extent, and I'm in no hurry to indulge in despair. It's just... the sudden loss of the ability to see fully was too painful for me. Okay just the pain of gaining a skill... but a critical reduction in the quality of vision is not something that can be dealt with through gritted teeth and endurance. It's a fucking loss of combat potential!

I guess you could say I can't see much of anything now... aside from that drugged up nonsense in front of my eyes. Speaking of which...

If I look at the ground, I see... blue lines, and there are many, many of them. They literally cover the entire earth and obscure almost everything that could be seen on its surface. If you look up, up into the sky... you can see the same thing... And let's not forget the space right in front of me, which, although there were no blue lines, had a lot of small particles that looked like mini clouds.

Perhaps it would be correct to call it... 'mana', or even more accurately... 'magic background', which, judging by the huge number of 'particle-clouds', just so off the scale. They literally filled everything: space, rocks, blades of grass... the corpse... The corpses themselves, in my 'magical vision' - that's what I called it - felt almost alive, except for that black dot in the middle of this grey... stuff? It's hard to describe in words... Whether it was a round or oval grey figure-silhouette, with a black dot-circle inside - that's how the dead wolf looked in the magical vision.

And the living didn't have this blackness... It's just my guess... but I think it's an empty space or something formed in the place of the soul, or the remains of the soul itself. Well, why wouldn't it be? For example, unlike the dead wolves, I saw the girls without that blackness, and they shone in different colours. Aquina, for example, seemed to consist entirely of blue particles, I can't see exactly (probably, the reason is that my vision is still of the first level), and Elvina of pink ones. Vivi on the other hand was overflowing with two colours, white and black... two opposites... what heresy, where did I get that from....

A magician of light and darkness or something? That's what I thought, but... it was just a theory, nothing more, and asking her myself was fraught... If I said the wrong thing, how would I explain my awareness?

It was good that they were now discussing something passionately amongst themselves... or was that a bad thing? Usually they're friends against someone... Wait, I have good hearing, it's time to take my mind off my attempts to understand what my eyes see and eavesdrop on the conversation.

- Aquinas-dono, are you sure we should be doing this?

- I'm sure we should. Arien-sama will be pleased!

- I don't know.

- Well, it's a day's walk to the village, so we'll decide there. For now, let's skin those who have more or less intact skins.

- I don't know how to do that.

- Umu... me neither...

- K... WHAT!!! - Aquina exclaimed emotionally, but because of my eyesight, I couldn't appreciate her gesticulation.

- T-then... we should forget about this venture... and the smell of blood will definitely attract the local predators. And this... I hope you won't refuse to help me?

- Sure! /Umu... - their silhouettes moved towards the corpses of wolves, and I had to pretend that I was 'busy with important things'.

I don't know what kind of things, but the main thing is that I'm busy - and I can continue eavesdropping....

- Ooh, at least you can do that. Well, we have time while Arien-sama is resting....

- Uh-huh, he's a... talented mage...

- What do you mean, Vivi?

- He... was... silent... without chanting....

- Really? I didn't see it... and he didn't tell me anything about it! Ohhhh! And I told him about all my powers!

- It's okay, Aquinas-dono... I guess he hasn't picked the right time for it yet. In the future, I hope he'll tell us everything.

- Me too, Elvina, but he's too secretive. From the first time we met, he never took off his hood.

- You don't think he's doing this on purpose, do you? You said he saved you, like me and Vivi and the other girls. Does that make his behaviour suspicious or unworthy?

There was silence. The girls thought in silence, cutting up the poor wolf, and then Vivi resumed the conversation:

- Arien... kind... too kind.....

The girls, at her words, burst out laughing.

- That's true. Not every adventurer dares to enter the goblin cave alone. But he did, and defeated all the goblins. Saved you and the other girls! I think he's a hero... at least to me. And I don't know about you. But to me, even his overly mysterious image makes him attractive.

- Aquinas-dono... what are you talking about?

- Hee-hee, sorry. I read too many books as a child. But... he's hiding his face for a reason. And I'm sure there's a good reason why! - she finished with a funny grin that turned into laughter, and the other girls supported her with the same laughter.

I pondered for a moment.

'Hiding my face for an important reason...' Yes, that's true - otherwise I'd get killed, I'm not sure, but probably by my own. But about the hero thing... heh 'Hero', that sounds proud and it can be used!

Damn, that sounded... villainous... and I'm not really a villain. More like... a dark hero, but not the bright image Aquinas had built up in her head. She may know something, but to her, I'm still a knight without fear or favour. Well, with her words, she probably decided to encourage Vivi and Elvina... by painting a halo over my head.

Girls love 'heroes,' hehe.

True, if the image of a hero in their eyes darkens... it'll be painful to fall... And so, I have to go through the evolution and finally take off this damn bandana! And... one should choose words more carefully to prepare the ground for a possible fall. At the same time, I have to make sure that Aquina and Elvina can't do anything - ideally nothing - to make them 'turn away' from me.

Vivi. I don't trust her yet, she's still... a dark horse for me. But for the sake of my hamster nature - or rather because of it - I'll take her too! She's a mage, and judging by the way she phrased her questions, she's more experienced than Aquina and me combined.

Huh.

One problem. I may not be completely blind, but will I ever regain my sight or not? I don't want to start learning to live as a half-sighted person - though it may have its advantages.

For example, I've heard that blind people have other senses of perception to replace their lost sight - which is good in itself, but it can't help but have a positive effect on my dexterity and reaction speed. But how many times will I have to die before those senses are heightened? Or how much time I'll have to spend mastering my new identity... it's hard to imagine.

- Miss Arien! We've finished resupplying, and I think it's time for us to continue on our way,' Aquinas said, and with that I smelled raw meat and my stomach rumbled for food.

- Ar-ra? Arien-sama... are you hungry?

- Here's the thing... Aquinas...

- That's how it is, then... we can stay a bit longer and cook you some food! - Aquina didn't listen to me, and then she vanished from my sight, leaving me to wonder.

I'm hungry, but the smell of blood that's in the air now... might attract predators again. And if the likes of the destroyed wolves - the Fulphas, I think Aquinas called them - can be dealt with... what if something more dangerous comes in on the scent?

Not only do we have ballast in the form of girl dolls that won't take a step without a poke in the back. We're moving at the speed of a turtle. I didn't even ask what to do with their bellies! I'm in the way again. I have to solve this problem quickly.

Nodding to my thoughts, I looked around for Aquina and found her... making fire with magic.... without chanting. The interesting thing was that fiery red particles were flying out of her hands (with my current vision I can't make it out, but it was probably her hands).... and then they formed into the Runes of Fire (f), bursting with a bright fiery light.

Definitely. One can tolerate... this side effect.

*Zing*

The skill of magical gaze has been enhanced.

The world in my eyes burst into a rainbow of colours, causing me to fall on my heels and clench my eyes shut, trying not to scream in pain as if hot nails were being slowly plunged into my eyes.

- Mr Arien! What's wrong? - Elvina's excited voice came from somewhere to the side, and then I felt something very soft, firm, and large touching me near my shoulder blades... Coupled with that, the sensation of a girl's hot breath on my ear made my body goosebumps.