Chapter 20 - Wait, Guys! It's Not What You Think!
Chapter 20
Wait, Guys! It’s Not What You Think!
The next morning, Li Yundong walked out of the door of his apartment with a trash bag containing the broken pendant light. Locking his door, he shook his head and sighed. “Can’t believe I nearly tore down the whole place in just a single night,” he mumbled.
Behind him, Su Chan stuck out her tongue sheepishly.
After disposing of the trash bag at the dumpster, Li Yundong left his apartment block with Su Chan and had breakfast at some cafe before heading to campus.
Upon his arrival at the campus, Li Yundong realized, much to his annoyance, that his fellow students had taken their finger-pointing and whispering up a notch.
“Psst! Hey, see that guy over there? That’s Li Yundong, the one who took down Zhao Yujian yesterday!”
“Yeah, right. He doesn’t even look like he can throw a punch. Maybe Zhao Yujian slipped and fell?”
“Dude, have you got shit for brains or what? You wanna show me how you could slip and fall, then end up with a fracture?”
“No shit? He got f*cked up that bad?”
Li Yundong’s auditory senses had been enhanced by the Renyuan Jindan as well, so he could hear everything that the students were whispering about when he walked past them. “Fracture? I didn’t punch him that hard, did I?”
Li Yundong turned to the side and looked at Su Chan. “The guy I punched yesterday fractured his leg bone,” he said. “Do you think I should visit him at the hospital?”
Su Chan was by no means a cold-hearted person, just that she’d been involved in the world of Cultivation for so long that the notion of “survival of the fittest” had been drilled into her. The strong feed on the weak. That was how it had always been in the world of Cultivation. The idea of pretending to show concern for one’s enemies after taking them down was not something she could fathom, let alone accept.
Su Chan snorted and raised her chin defiantly. “Serves him right for being so arrogant despite his lack of abilities!”
Li Yundong pondered Su Chan’s words for a moment, then nodded. “True. He wouldn’t have gotten hurt if he hadn’t acted like an aggressive asshole yesterday…”
They stepped into the lecture hall and walked all the way back to the last row. Once they were seated, Li Yundong saw the class rep, Sun Li, approaching them from the front. He thought Sun Li should add another A-plus to her list of A-pluses, this time for Mocking Smile 101.
Sun Li took her seat, then said, “Congratulations, Li Yundong. Your status has risen once again, you’re practically a legend now.”
“What did I do this time?” Li Yundong asked innocently.
Sun Li felt like smashing her books against Li Yundong to wipe that innocent look off his face. “What did you do?” Sun Li laughed incredulously. “You’ve been running amok in the university for the past few days, that’s what! Breaking one of Zeng Qin’s ribs? Fracturing Zhao Yujian’s tibia? Kicking Director Qian? What’s next, huh? Castrating the chancellor?”
Li Yundong didn’t like the tone that Sun Li had used on him. “What, it’s my fault now?” Li Yundong snapped. “They’re the ones who started it! What was I supposed to do? Lie down and let them beat me up? Is that your idea of being reasonable?”
Sun Li was so startled by Li Yundong’s sudden outburst that she actually choked a little. But then she quickly recovered with a defiant raise of her chin. “What about Director Qian then? Did he try to beat you up too?” she challenged.
Li Yundong sighed. “That was just a misunderstanding. Look, even Mr. Qian himself has decided not to pursue this matter further, so why are you here getting your panties in a bunch over it?” Misunderstanding? Right. If you call trying to steal his woman a misunderstanding, then sure. However, Li Yundong decided to keep that information to himself lest he piss off Director Qian again. Not that he wasn’t already on the old geezer’s shit list, which, in hindsight, was all the more reason for him to keep his mouth shut.
Sun Li stood up in anger and pointed a finger at Li Yundong. “Oh, so you’re not going to pursue the matter further, is that it? Let me tell you something, tough guy. Director Qian already called the chancellor yesterday to ask for your expulsion. So good luck with that!”
“Wait, what? He called the chancellor?” Li Yundong stared back at Sun Li in shock. “How do you even know that?”
Sun Li snorted. “How do I know? I think you’re the only one who doesn’t know! No wonder you look so relaxed.”
After that, she gave Li Yundong a dismissive glance before she turned around and walked away. Dazed, Li Yundong’s eyes followed the bounce of Sun Li’s ponytail until she took a seat at the front row of the lecture hall.
For a long while, Li Yundong just sat there with a blank look on his face, not even realizing it when the professor entered and began today’s lecture. He was in a world of his own, a world where he went broke and ended up begging on the streets.
He finally snapped out of it when a girl took the seat beside him and poked him in his side.
It was Feng Na, the girl from the Taekwondo Club who had asked for his autograph the other day.
A wave of frustration rose inside him, culminating in the form of a mocking laugh. “What, so you’re here to pick on me as well?” he asked.
Feng Na flinched a little, looking nothing but confused. ‘What? What do you mean? Who’s been picking on you?”
Only then did Li Yundong realize that he’d taken out his anger on the wrong person. He sighed, then turned to give Feng Na an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else,” he said, coming up with a lame excuse. Then, he cleared his throat. “So. What can I do for you?”
Feng Na sighed and leveled a serious stare at Li Yundong. “You know about the exchange visit right? A group of students from the University of Pennsylvania will be here in seven days.”
Li Yundong tilted his head to the side, then said, “Yeah, I think I heard about it. Why?”
Feng Na released another sigh, this time a longer one. Then, she stared at Li Yundong resentfully, which lasted for a few minutes until Li Yundong felt totally creeped out. “Hey, just spit it out, will you?” Li Yundong said. “And stop looking at me like I’ve done something unforgivable to you.”
Feng Na gave Su Chan a sidelong glance, then looked back at Li Yundong again. “Yeah… As if you’d even be interested in the likes of me when you’ve got such a pretty girl with you,” Feng Na said in a small voice.
“But you have such a prominent forehead!” Su Chan cut in all of a sudden, causing Feng Na and Li Yundong to look at her. Su Chan batted her eye lashes a few times, then began studying Feng Na’s face. “Let’s see… Well, your Renzhong isn’t long, but it’s got width and depth.” Su Chan’s eyes travelled upwards. “Your hair looks dark and healthy, and you’ve got really thick eyebrows. Ooh! Your eyes are sharp and bright! That’s definitely a good sign.” Su Chan leaned back and nodded in approval. “Well, you’re no match for the ideal dinglu I saw last time.” Su Chan raised her palm as if she anticipated some form of protest. “Can’t blame you though. That one is one-in-a-million. She’s got Chun Yin. But hey, based on your qualities, I’d say that you’re a pretty good dinglu. You should fornicate with Li Yundong. I won’t mind!”
Fornicate!!
What the fornicate!!!
At that moment, Feng Na was staring at Su Chan with bulging eyes whereas Li Yundong gaped at her. THUD! Some guy at the front row fell off his seat. The dude turned around and gave Li Yundong a thumbs up. “Dude, where did you find this chick, anyway? She’s so awesome!”
The corners of Li Yundong’s lips convulsed awkwardly. He let out a few fake laughs, then turned to Feng Na. “This girl has no filter,” he said. “Just pretend you didn’t hear her.”
Then, he shot Su Chan a glare and hissed, “Shut up, missy! Don’t let me hear that nonsense again!”
“It’s not nonsense!” Su Chan argued indignantly, then pointed a finger at Feng Na. “Just look at her! Isn’t she a good dinglu?”
That comment pissed Li Yundong off to no end. “How does she even resemble a good dinglu?” Li Yundong opened his mouth, wanting to voice out that exact thought, but then closed his mouth again the moment he saw the other students gaping at him. Hell, he was pretty sure they all thought he was some kind of serial rapist!
Li Yundong blushed under the scrutiny of his classmates. Maybe he should punch a hold in the floor using his super strength, then jump right into it. Then again, no hole or crevice could possibly save him from the filterless mouth of Su Chan who, apparently, wasn’t even done talking! That girl was unstoppable! “Look at how thick her eyebrows are! The roots of her eyebrows are so close together and have yet to spread out! Clearly, her maidenhood still remains…”
Maidenhood!!!
A series of gasps sounded. All of a sudden, the students were all looking at Feng Na in a completely different way.
Li Yundong pounced and clamped his hand over Su Chan’s mouth. If he had a thread and a needle, he would sew her lips shut, honest to God! “If you don’t stop talking now, then I swear to God I’ll put you over my knees when we get home and spank you!”
Su Chan struggled against Li Yundong’s hand. “I’ll keep talking even if you spank me!” she said, her voice muffled by Li Yundong’s hand.
Li Yundong laughed. “Then I won’t cook for you. I’ll let you starve for two days straight. How about that?”
Su Chan stopped struggling all of a sudden. She looked up at him with her puppy dog eyes and said, “You don’t like Chan’er anymore?” Su Chan sniffed. “Why would you starve Chan’er for two days?”
A guy who was sitting nearby said, “Don’t worry, doll! I like you a lot! I’ll feed you to your heart’s content!”
Li Yundong’s foot slammed into the back of the dipsh*t’s chair. “F*ck off!” he growled.
Turning back to Su Chan, Li Yundong whispered, “If you sit quietly and don’t speak, I’ll like you. You hear me?”
“Okay,” Su Chan mumbled, hugging her knees and pressing her cheek on her kneecap. Although she didn’t speak again after that, Su Chan’s eyes were still trained on Feng Na. “I’m not wrong, dammit! She is a good dinglu. Why won’t anyone believe me!”
Beside Li Yundong, Feng Na was blushing so hard that she might actually start bleeding from the pores of her skin. She would’ve fled the scene a long time ago if it wasn’t for the urgent business she had with Li Yundong.
Li Yundong was actually surprised that Feng Na was still there. “Well, she’s just like that, so just ignore her,” Li Yundong said, smiling at her sheepishly, then cleared his throat. “You, um, you have something to talk to me about?”
Feng Na raised her head, revealing her deep blush. “This is all your fault!” she said, glaring at Li Yundong.
Li Yundong groaned inwardly. “What did I do this time?”
Never in her life had Feng Na been teased this badly before, and her mortification turned into anger, which she then took out on Li Yundong. “I wouldn’t even come here to talk to you if it weren’t for what you did!”
What you did?
What did you do? Knock her up?
Well, those were the thoughts going through the minds of all the guys sitting near Li Yundong at that moment. Clever bunch, aren’t they?
A series of rustling sounded where students, boys and girls alike, shifted in their seats and brought their ears closer to listen to the exchange. The grapevines of Tiannan University, it seemed, had just grown another inch.
“But we’ve only known each other for a day! What could I have done to you!” Li Yundong said exasperatedly.
Feng Na gasped, aghast by his refusal to acknowledge his own actions. “You know damn well what you did yesterday!” she said loudly.
The looks on the students faces were… interesting.
The guys looked as though they were about to lose their shit: “You’ve only known her for a day, yet you’ve already managed to get her pregnant?! What the f*ck? Is your dick equipped with a sniper scope or something?”
The girls, on the other hand, gave Feng Na sympathetic glances: “Poor girl. How unfortunate of her to fall for a loser like Li Yundong. And what about the other pretty chick? She’s so young, yet she’s as beautiful as a fox spirit! She could have any guy she wants, but she chose Li Yundong?! Seriously, are they blind? What do they even see in this guy? He’s broke and has no accomplishments. Even if they don’t care about money and accomplishments, they should at least find a guy who’s handsome! Now look how things turned out. One of them got knocked up. Tsk, tsk. Pretty sure that carrying the child of a guy like that isn’t something to be proud of. What will she do now? Get an abortion, I bet. That loser is too broke to feed the child…”
Of course, the more experienced girls looked at the scene with skepticism: “This makes no sense. No girl can tell that she’s pregnant only one day after sex…”
A lecture hall is where knowledge is gained and ideas are born. Or so they say. How could knowledge be gained when not a single student there was even looking at the blackboard in front?
No. There was no knowledge to be gained on this day, not when the young professor of History of Modern Chinese Literature was left standing pathetically at the lectern, having a pretty interesting conversation with the walls. Eventually, the professor began to realize that his students’ attention was elsewhere — the walls never responded to his questions.
The professor stood awkwardly at the lectern and sighed. “Kids these days are just a bunch of degenerates compared to the great scholars of old…”
They really should give him a raise for having to put up with this crap.