Phantom Blade Zephyr: One Piece

Meeting the Straw Hats was... well unique, to say the least. I mean, when you see one of your favorite characters roam around in circles for like an hour and a half, your level of amazement kind of decreases. I knew that he was bad with directions, but seeing it with your own eyes is something else entirely.

I did like talking with him, though. He is a no-bullshit type of guy who doesn't pry into others's business, which I much appreciated. Plus, he didn't judge about my weird appearance. Three years of jungle life hadn't done my hygiene any favors, and I probably looked like some kind of caveman.

Well, his captain didn't have any filters, though.

"Zoro," Luffy said, still chewing on a mouthful of food, "who's that weird dude beside you?"

Before Zoro could answer, Nami smacked Luffy over the head.

"Finish your food before you talk, idiot. Also, Zoro, who's the weird guy?"

How was that any better than what Luffy said? I thought Nami was supposed to be the sensible one!

At least Princess Vivi seemed polite. She gave me a warm smile and asked,

"Sir, may we know who you are?"

"Well, I'm surprised Dorry and Broggy haven't mentioned me. I've been here for three years," I said, giving the giants a side-eye.

Broggy scratched his head, looking sheepish.

"Ah…kinda forgot."

How can they forget about me? Their memory is like a goldfish. No wonder they forgot the reason for their 100-year duel.

"Anyway, name's Zephyr," I said with a short nod. "I'm a swordsman and a pirate. You guys must be the Straw Hat Pirates."

"You know us?" Luffy asked, looking delighted.

"Not really," I admitted. "I ran into some folks from an organization called Baroque Works talking about interrupting the giants' duel. So I decided to take care of them myself. They had your poster too."

Hearing the name Baroque works changed the mood among the Straw Hats. Specially Vivi shifted nervously,

"Did you get their names?" She asked, her tone cautious.

"Yeah, though I think they were codenames. Two of them called each other Mr. 5 and Mr. 3, and there was a woman named Miss Valentine. She had a Devil Fruit that could mess with weight."

"Was there anyone else?" Vivi pressed.

"Oh, yeah, a kid. Knocked her out before the fight started. I thought she was a hostage, but turns out she was with them. Can't believe these guys would drag kids into this nonsense."

The Straw Hats' expressions shifted to something between shock and respect, especially Vivi, who knew all too well how dangerous those agents could be. Sensing my chance, I decided to bring up the reason I was here.

"Anyway," I started casually, "you guys have a ship, right?"

They nodded, albeit a bit nervously.

"So… Any chance you could give me a ride to the next island? I've been stuck here long enough."

Hearing my question, Vivi's face fell. Nami glanced at me sympathetically. "We'd love to leave too, but the log pose here takes a year to reset."

"Oh, right." I pulled out the eternal log pose I'd "liberated" from the Baroque Works crew and held it up. "Good thing I grabbed this! It points straight to Alabasta."

As I held out the log pose, the faces of the Straw Hats were a sight to behold. It took everything I had to keep a straight face. This theatric is just way too much fun.

Nami and Usopp jumped up together.

"We're saved! We don't have to stay on this hellhole of an island!"

"Hey! I'm not giving it for free!"

Nami's expression soured as she crossed her arms. "What do you want for it, then?"

"First of all, safe passage to Albasta. And of course, a spare set of clothes would be nice."

That was all I'd planned to ask for, but suddenly, an idea hit me—one too good to pass up. I couldn't resist.

This is going to be fun.

"Oh, and one more thing: the price is 200,000 berries. I know you have that kind of cash with a princess onboard," I said, throwing a pointed glance at Vivi, who looked caught off guard. "But, since I'm feeling generous, how about a deal instead?"

Everyone's interest piqued at once.

"What kind of deal?" Nami asked suspiciously.

I grinned. "If you can beat me in a fight, I'll waive the fee."

Sanji clapped a hand on Zoro's shoulder. "Mosshead, you better win this. Do it for Nami-swaaaaan!"

Seeing his reaction, I laughed, which was also noticed by them.

"You misunderstand," I clarified, still grinning. "I meant all of you together."