NOVEL NEXT 1.55 – Guilt
The way back to the Copper Butterfly Inn was marred by piles of discarded clothing and bodily fluids.
"Ugh, my wife is going to kill me."
So said a Dragonkin covering himself and briskly walking home. He was but one of many who Maple, Emma, and Azure Bond had passed on the way. Some were more devastated than others, be it from Maple's Skill, or—
"Why did I do all that? I couldn't have. I—this isn't even me. Who am I? I'm not...me."
A mix of both.
Each person was an arrow of guilt that struck Maple. They were back to normal—mostly—but she desperately wanted someone to tell her it hadn't been her fault. That it wasn't her milk, and that the mass [Telepathic Orgasm] had been a good thing and they'd recover.
She wanted to apologize. She thought about turning herself in, but couldn't see what good that would actually do. Not right now, at least, before the chaos had fully subsided. If they started looking for her—she would.
Of course, they weren't all like that. Thera and Sylla seemed fine, if a little shaken. They were adventurers; as a rule, their baseline mental fortitude was higher. They'd volunteered, and been warned ahead of time.
Bailey was a nearer comparison to the average person, though he was a guard and similarly should have a higher mental fortitude on average. Using the Skill with just four people had been too much for him.
And indeed, on the other end were people who hadn't minded any of it. They were a vast minority, but they went home with a story to tell their future grandchildren, some of who would be conceived on the very day.
There was a bigger rift. At least half the city hadn't had any dairy, and experienced none of it. They didn't understand—couldn't understand.
"Serves you right, perverts! Go home and stop bothering us civilized folk."
And if only your partner had drank the milk? You might understand logically they'd been under the influence of—something. But if you saw them in any of those moments of lust and betrayal?
They hadn't been unconscious, nor entirely brainwashed. There was a fragment of truth in everything that had happened, or been said.
Or if you, in a dead-bedroom relationship, had been the one who drank the milk—and now remembered what you were missing out on? Needed?
Relationships were ruined, families torn apart.
And yet, there were no new widows or orphans. No bodies to bury. Syber had endured worse, and this one would pass.
Emma kept a tight grip on Maple's hand. Her presence was the most reassuring thing in this world. She worried what the slime would do if she did get arrested.
One other thing bothered Maple, and she brought it up on their walk back.
"If it was the milk doing it, then why wasn't Thera affected?"
They all pondered that, and Alas enlightened them.
"That's her secret; she's always horny."
"Am not. But...maybe I was affected. I don't think I normally would have stripped like that, and I am pretty embarrassed about it."
"...Are you?"
Maple genuinely had to ask. She had had multiple moments of embarrassment. What part of Thera was embarrassed? She said it, but where were the signs?
"Oh, yes. Very. You might even say that I'm...mortified."
To prove her point, she looked away and covered her mouth with her hand. It was like someone lifelessly shaking their fist and calmly declaring they were enraged. She turned back, meeting Maple's confused stare, and shrugged.
"Same as anything else; it's there, but it's not like I would let that kind of feeling bother me, you know?"
She really didn't know. Not at all. But between that, and the pain tolerance displayed earlier, it made sense that the milk hadn't affected her much. If at all, she wanted to add, but had to give her some credit. Maple nodded, and after a few seconds Thera reluctantly continued.
"Alright, I do have a Skill that probably helped, but that one really is embarrassing to say."
"What is it? It can't be as bad as any of mine."
Besides her hesitation, Thera really didn't seem embarrassed in the slightest. Alas prodded her.
"What's wrong captain? Not too stubborn to say it, are you?"
"I'm not stubborn. It's just, one of the first Skills I got on my own. It's precious to me..."
Well now Maple was curious, but waited before pressing for an answer.
"It's: [Stubborn As Steel, Forged Will]."
"How's that embarrassing? It sounds fancy, doesn't it? Are you sure you even know what embarrassment is?"
The number of words in a Skill often denoted its quality. Or rarity, at the least. Like Maple's [Lesser Enhanced Pleasure] 'upgrading' to [Enhanced Pleasure, You And Me]. Which was more powerful, but not in a good way.
"Because, it makes it sound like I'm stubborn. I'm not, but all my prospects get scared off by it. Still, it's the Skill that helped me defy the Church. I'm fond of it."
And she did smile somewhat fondly, but the 'somewhat' part of that, and how she stated it, made Maple wonder if that fondness was held at a distance. Like her supposed embarrassment. Something that was there, but that she had to allow herself to feel fully. Another double-edged Skill, she speculated.
Yet the [Blade Captain] had a personality. A strong, boisterous one. How much of it was...willfully crafted? Forged. What must that be like? To have a will so strong that your emotions were at a remove, and stronger still, to be somebody in spite of that. She really was just speculating, but...
"Aye, our captain's got a will to match any stinking God's. It's why we rally around her."
"I wouldn't go that far. It was just some [Bishops]..."
"Captain Thera, don't sell yourself short. You broke a Class-Lock on your own, and got a Skill worthy of that."
"Aw, you really are embarrassing me now."
"We're just proud for you, even if you're stubbornly embarrassed."
"I'll show you stubborn, come here."
They were encouraging her, almost delicately. Maple lacked context, but decided her speculation wasn't too far off. If you had enough willpower to block certain emotions off, then how you used that willpower would change much.
It was good to see them help direct it positively. And their dynamic in general. Thera was trying to get Alas into a headlock, and Alas was trying to keep a giggling Sylla between them.
She should ask for the full story, find out what a Class-Lock was, but watching them took her mind off the snowballing guilt. Plus—they'd arrived.
