Natasha the Halve

“But last night you were drunk beyond sanity.” I pointed out.

He scratched the back of an ear and looked away. “I had a soup when we got back to the inn.”

“Later we got Henga’s letter and we went to get the reward.” Bromisnar said. “We saw them on our way back.”

“What level were they?” Alyssa asked.

She fixed a lock of white silvery hair with the tip of her tail. I was momentarily shocked by the nearly limitless potential the appendage had. I looked at the Tigea’s tail, wondering if it was as useful.

“Beyond what we could see.” Bonte shook his head.

The man’s answer brought me back to reality.

“What would that mean, then? At the minimum?” I crossed my arms.

“Two hundred the highest class, at the very least.” Bromisnar answered as he fixed his sleeves.

This is so confusing. I sighed.

“So,” I began, resting my hands on my hips. “Are you two okay with joining us for the foreseeable future, considering this cringirin wannabe?” I asked the two men.

Bonte nodded, and Bromisnar chuckled.

“It could turn into an epic tale” the Satyr said with a smile.

A chuckle escaped me at his overly positive outlook.

What do I have that can help? I wondered as I went through my storage.

A pair of golden aviator sunglasses materialized in my hand and appraised them.

[Summer Sunglasses (Legendary)]

(UV Protection) (Tinted Lens) (True Sight) (Durability S)

“Bonte, can you turn invisible?” I asked.

He nodded and crouched, then vanished in a puff of shadows.

“What are you doing?” Lapia chuckled.

I put them on and saw the Tigea making a funny face. I chuckled and gave him a nod.

“Those look good on you.” Alyssa giggled.

“Thank you. Okay, these are pretty good.” I produced five pairs of sunglasses. “Have these, they can see through invisibility. More comfortable than the helmets, and they protect your eyes from the suns.”

“They what?” Bonte almost choked, then dispelled his invisibility. “Lemme see.”

He received a pair and tried putting them on, only for them to fall off his face. His ears were on top of his head.

Right…

“Here…” I gave each a pair of sunglasses and they put them on, checking their surroundings.

Then, I squatted next to Bonte and stared at him for a few seconds.

“What?” his tone was a little anxious.

His amber feline eyes jumped from my face to my hands. I stared at the cartilaginous organs and experience a little uncanny valley after noticing the empty sides of his head.

“I’m thinking of a way to keep the sunglasses from moving. You could braid your hair so the tips get stuck.” I pointed at his head.

He nodded. “Pretty smart.”

Following my suggestion, he ended up with two braids framing his face, the sunglasses secured in them.

“Alright…” I sighed.

Now what? I bit my lips as I stood up. I’m not a natural leader. The Hoplite class is useless with it’s militaristic knowledge.

I decided to appraise them to kill time while they looked around wearing the sunglasses.

[Lapia Pofeta – Bonded Partner – Domi Elf, Lvl 192 Pyromancer]

[Alyssa Pruvik – Bonded Partner – Krystaali Luzo, Lvl 249 Cardinal]

[Yolin Makav – Bonded Partner – Red Oni, Lvl 305 Asura]

[Bromisnar Bahadh – Bonded Companion – Khlyp Satyr, Lvl 174 Minstrel]

[Bonte Slirmy – Bonded Companion – Shishi Tigea, Lvl 156 Shadow Chaser]

Looking good. Alyssa hasn’t gained much, though. And Yolin… well. Her level is too high.

I nodded a few times.

“These work like solar goggles.” Lapia commented, walking to me.

“Can you see me?” Bonte asked, moving around in a crouched position.

“I can.” Bromisnar nodded while following the Tigea with his head. “True sight, huh? Pretty useful.”

“The design is pretty sleek.” Alyssa said, fixing the glasses with her tail.

What is beyond that tail?! I sighed with amazement.

She and Yolin threw gang signs while giggling.

“Ah, by the way.” Bonte stood up and produced three pouches. “The money from the bounties.”

The three women received them and gave their thanks, then stored them.

“Quite the haul.” Yolin smiled widely. “I’ve never gotten this much money for so little effort.”

“You did a pretty good job of protecting us.” Lapia smirked and ran a hand through the tank’s muscled arm.

The Oni blushed and nodded. “You’re welcome, then.”

Alyssa giggled and I smiled at them.

“I think you should stay over at Koporva’s.” I nodded to the two men. “That way if something happens we’d be close.”

“With the reward, it’s affordable.” Bromisnar nodded and folded his arms behind him. “We’d need to get our belongings and cancel our current stay.”

Bonte nodded in agreement.

“We should get back into the dungeon tomorrow morning.” Alyssa said. “It’s late already.”

She took Lapia’s hand, who nodded. Yolin walked to me, hugged me from behind, and gave me a kiss on the neck.

I felt my face burn in embarrassment, the men were looking at us. Their expression didn’t change in the slightest, however.

Slowly turning around, I looked int the Oni’s sky blue eyes. She gave a wide smile and a wink.

“Let’s go, then.” she said.

I gave her a weak nod and we followed her into the building.

When we left the Church, we spotted the Watchers patrolling. That calmed me a little, knowing public security would most likely deter any shadowy individual from trying anything too daring in the open. While I could instantly kill anyone below level one thousand, I’d very much like to avoid committing murder if possible.

We made our way to the mounts and continued to the men’s inn. Bonte guided us as Bromisnar played his lute.

After arriving at their inn, Yolin dismounted and escorted them inside in case anything was planted. We all wore the sunglasses in case of invisible individuals. They complied with my no-risk policy.

The building was similar to the inn we were staying at, but had a more ‘rustic’ feeling, if that was possible in a tight city built of granite.

Our way back was as uneventful as the previous days.

Dasiso welcomed them with a smile and they registered for the foreseeable future. They rented the room next to ours, and we turned in for the day.

Us women went into our love nest, and sat in the living room.

Lapia took out some alcohol and put it on the table between us.

Yolin sat next to me on the sofa closest to the door, and the other two on the opposite sofa.

Serving the drinks, the Elf started talking.

“So, Natasha,” she began. “You mentioned polyamory. Could you go into detail?”

I sighed and received a glass of transparent liquid she offered.

Alyssa got plum wine, and Yolin had a similar drink to mine. The Wizard got some ale for herself.

“It’s a little complicated.” I took a sip. “First, I’m pretty ignorant about all that. It wasn’t until pretty late into my life that I discovered it, and I never was a part of it.”

Alyssa nodded and drank a little from her glass.

“Polyamory would be what we have. Four women in a relationship network. We have a non-hierarchical network since we don’t prioritize one over the others.” I drank more vodka. “That doesn’t mean we won’t prioritize you in combat, with you two being… what’s the term? Ranged casters?” I tilted my head.

Alyssa shook her head. “Back line. Archers, healers, and Wizards form the back line.”

“A Scout can cover them, and I would be on the front with you. We’d be the vanguard.” Yolin explained. “Most Scouts are fluid in their position, since they’re reactive in their engagement in most scenarios.”

“Right. Well, that’d be pretty much all I know.” I smiled. “I used to have only one partner at a time.”

Lapia nodded. “I see.”

“The nature of our relationships follow the example of the Divines.” Alyssa said, and took another sip. “They are all in a relationship.”

I choked on my drink. “Wha-cough. What? All of them?”

“All of them.” Yolin next to me confirmed.

Lapia chuckled at me cleaning my face.

“How many are there?” I asked in shock. “What about children?”

I couldn’t believe my ears. An entire species(?) of beings in one big relationship was beyond my understanding.

Wouldn’t that be incest?

“Divines are immortal. They can’t have children.” Alyssa giggled. “There’s fifty of them.”

“Holy shit!” I exclaimed. “Wait, so there are no demigods?”

“Not sure what you mean, but Divines can’t have offspring.” the Elf shook her head.

“An organism that can’t die permanently has no need for reproduction.” Alyssa explained. “We can because we die.”

“Do they split like a cell, then?” I asked.

“HAHAHAHA!!!”

The three laughed, and I covered my face with a hand.

“Can you imagine having two Yiamas?” Yolin asked the two.

“Or two Photems.” Lapia shuddered. “I’ll pass.”

The two chuckled.

“That’d be a major pain in the butt.” Alyssa shook her head. “Imagine two Danuvas lazying together.”

“What’s with that?” I asked, remembering her saying something like that before. “Why is Danuva lazy?”

“She awakened the species. Since then, she’s done very little.” Yolin chuckled.

This conversation is going everywhere. I chuckled. How did we go from polyamory to a lazy Goddess.

“Anyway.” I sighed and leaned on Yolin’s shoulder. “So relationships follow Divine form. That’s cool. I remember Lady Dabrak mentioned something about Saravia, Danuva, and Shorvanna living together?”

“Oh, imagine two Shorvannas.” Yolin chuckled.

“Yes, they live in a temple up north.” Alyssa nodded.

“Yiama lives further north.” Lapia served more alcohol. “Near the coast.”

I nodded.

Are these Olympian Gods? I wondered. The comparison was screaming at me.

The evening went on with silly talks and more drinking. When the night enveloped Mountroad, the rain started falling harder, but the sound-proof enchantments kept the noise out.

The three went ahead to bed after I told them I wanted to update my journal. I’ll still join them since I want to sleep before going to the dungeon.

I was wrong. Relationships are not the way they are because of lack of influence. This is amazing. I really want to meet a God now.

Maybe after we visit Paarjo we could pay Shorvanna a visit and she can give me a few pointers for my next class.

If I got things right, we Halves were close with Divines back in the day.

Nilenna’s letter was weird. I hope she doesn’t treat me like a little sister for real. Unless she’s thousands of years old… then there’s nothing I can do, really. I hope the rest aren’t like that as well.

I’m a little worried about the state of my mind… I will do my best to avoid fighting sentient beings. I hope I will remain sane if things escalate. I need to talk about this with my partners.

Also, I noticed women are incredibly vocal in bed. At least my partners are. It’s honestly liberating. None of that slow shit. They go straight for the clitoris.

Alyssa said she loves me! AAHHHHH!! She’s so cute! When I met her for the first time I thought she looked dangerous, but she’s none of that. She’s so… hnng! I’m really happy in this world. I don’t regret having died. Fuck pandemics!

If you’re from Earth and are reading this… Elf pussy feels really good. LMAO.

Having a penis is the shit. I haven’t felt any dysphoria yet. Was Freud right? Was I so attracted to men because of some phallic envy? There’s a catboy in the party and I don’t find him cute in the slightest.

The following weeks will be a speedrun to lvl 800. Any%, and since I can’t glitch reality that’s that. I guess it’s time to get the cash shop items out. I’m going all in.

I’ve used about half of the journal already… I should buy another one soon.

I’m thinking of ways to spice this journal up.

-17/3/1980. Yiama’s Era.