chapter 2
2 – 01. The haughty princess and her best friend -2
It’s been five days since I started going to the children’s home.
During that time, I was called “Ellie” by the princess, and every day, I played with the beautiful golden-haired girl, who made me feel happy just by looking at her.
Except for being called by her nickname, there wasn’t much difference.
“Ellie!”
“Yeodeon, you’re a… a fool, right?”
“Why am I a fool? Uh… oh, Ellie!”
“If you don’t behave, I won’t play with you anymore.”
“I’m sorry. Ellie, do you forgive me?”
“Humph.”
“Today, let’s draw a valuable picture…”
“I’ll go on the swing.”
“Picture…”
“Swing.”
“Awww.”
Each time I timidly resisted Ellie, but in the end, I would reluctantly follow her.
Although I was a bit disappointed that we couldn’t draw pictures together, it was enjoyable for me, as a young child, to do what Ellie wanted.
Besides, later, Ellie also showed some consideration, and we played together… played… um…
Our playing was just like before… wasn’t it?
Anyway, we were just like any other group of children, running around the children’s home, exploring every nook and cranny.
Ellie especially enjoyed playing outside. When other children had a hard time using play equipment, she would sit under a tree and play in the dirt, always staying outside.
She always took me with her.
And so, the teachers at the children’s home, who had seen us playing together for a few days, shed tears of emotion.
“What should I do? I feel like crying…”
“Take more pictures, Min-a. It seems like it’s time for you to move on. You’re stuck in the past.”
“Really? I was so worried that Do-yoon would be disappointed in the other kids, and his parents would worry even more…”
“It must be hard to see him not fitting in with his friends…”
They must have had a hard time with their hearts.
That little doll-like child clearly seemed to be struggling, and there was nothing they could do to help her make friends, which must have been frustrating.
“But both of them are really cute… Ellie is beautiful, and Do-yoon isn’t too cute? He has that model look, right?
“That’s right. When I grow up, maybe I’ll make the girls cry too?”
“Anyway… um…”
“Why are you like that?”
“Well, it’s… no, it’s nothing.”
“What’s wrong, it’s so bland.”
As she smiled contentedly at the cute children, Kim Min-ah, the Sun Class teacher, couldn’t help but harbor another concern.
On the surface, it looked like a close friendship where they played well together and had fun. However, if you observed the two a little more closely, you could discern the underlying truth.
“träd.”
“Tra… huh?”
“This, träd. Tree.”
“Dred?”
“Here, Anni Gibi.”
“I can draw Anni well! Hey, I can draw with pictures…”
“Judy Gibbon is here.”
“Ugh… Is this Judy’s house? Hello?”
“Hallå (Hello).”
Doyoon was so enthusiastic about drawing that he even suggested it right after their first meeting. He was very active and enjoyed art-related activities during class.
On the contrary, Alicia had been holding onto picture books and was very active, wandering around outside.
Their personalities were completely opposite.
Thanks to this, Doyoon, who had fallen for Alicia at first sight, was being pulled around just as she wanted.
Moreover, it wasn’t just about playing together.
“What’s this? You drew it well!”
“This is Julie. It’s a dinosaur. This is Duchi, but…”
“I know! It’s an ostrich! I want to do it too!”
If, during class, Doyoon was seen chatting happily with another child for even a moment, and that child showed signs of wanting to play with Doyoon…
“… It’s Doyoon.”
“Why, Eli?”
“Come here!”
“Huh? Yeah, yeah~”
Alicia, who had been quietly observing, grabbed Doyoon and dragged him away as soon as it was playtime, as if taking away her own friend.
Doyoon, who is friendly enough to get along with many other children, seems to have his opportunities stolen by Alicia.
Here, Kim Minah was caught in a dilemma.
It was pitiful for Alicia to take Doyoon away and play with other children, and if they tried to include Alicia in a group, all the children except Doyoon were afraid.
But if they left them alone to play together, it seemed like abandoning these children during such an important time for their social development.
“What should I do… Ugh… If I bring their parents and talk to them… Alicia’s parents would feel really sorry, right? Then I can just casually mention it to Doyoon’s parents… Ah, but that’s… What should I do!”
Even with a university degree and certification, she was only 26 years old. It was too overwhelming to control this kind of situation in detail.
As for seeking advice from other teachers, it seemed that they would not be helpful as they would just laugh it off and say, “Oh, it’ll be fine.”
So while she was agonizing over it for our sake.
I was playing house with Ellie, holding a doll, and I was extremely satisfied, apart from my desire to draw.
Sitting in front of me, wearing a cute pink skirt and a white t-shirt.
“Annie, I like steak.”
In one hand, Ellie held a doll and, unlike her usual combative demeanor, gave me a soft smile.
Like when she had told me her nickname, she smiled subtly.
‘Ellie must be a princess…’
She stole my gaze and stole my heart.
Her platinum blonde hair that I had seen countless times before and her blue eyes.
Each time I saw them, they made a deep impression on my heart.
So as a child, I couldn’t understand it even more. Why did the other friends not want to play with Ellie?
Like this.
“What does Judy like?”
So beautiful like this.
“…Judy. Iru. Youn!”
“Ah, yeah. Why?”
“Why. If I see you, I’ll give you something. Do you want it?”
“You want it?”
“Jaa~ Alicia? It’s not nice to say that to a friend~ Can the teacher intervene? The teacher will be a pet Yorkie! Woof woof!”
Even with muffled pronunciation, even in those young days.
The teacher was startled by Ellie’s harsh words and suddenly interrupted, but thankfully.
From our first meeting until now. And a little further into the future.
It took quite some time for her indistinct pronunciation to improve and for me to understand everything she said without difficulty.
Even if I understood, I didn’t pay much attention to it. Well, that’s just the way it is.
***
Every day was peaceful and enjoyable.
I looked forward to going to the daycare more than being at home. When I saw Elli at the daycare, I admired her, and Elli eagerly waited for me to arrive, playing together during playtime.
During class with the teacher, I would talk with the other kids and receive glances from Elli.
At mealtime,
“What are you eating?”
“Broccoli.”
“Broccoli isn’t bad, right? Alicia, you can picky eat, right? You have to eat all your broccoli~”
“Transformation… I don’t want to eat it.”
“You still lie even though you know everything.”
I would eat Elli’s disliked side dishes and get scolded by the teacher.
Eventually, I would laugh at Elli’s cute face as she reluctantly put broccoli in her mouth, puffing up her cheeks.
“Do it. Just try it.”
“Alicia!”
I would hear those unfamiliar, harsh words again.
And then, I would take a nap next to her.
Five days had already passed like that, and the weekend was approaching.
I wouldn’t be able to see Elli for two days.
But I wasn’t sad. In fact, I didn’t know. I had no idea that she wouldn’t come to daycare tomorrow and the day after because it was her first week at daycare.
So when it was time to go home, I sat next to Elli with pursed lips, waiting for our parents.
I thought it would be nice to draw with Elli tomorrow.
Then, I heard the teacher calling from afar, and Elli was holding onto my sleeve tightly.
“Alicia, we have to go home now, right? Say bye-bye to Do-yoon and see you again on Monday.”
“……”
“Elli, aren’t you going?”
Until then, I didn’t understand, and I stared blankly.
-Tap, tap!
Ellie grabbed my sleeve and pulled me along with her to her parents.
“Oh, Alicia?”
Leaving the surprised teacher behind, she ran ahead with quick steps, her shining platinum blonde hair flowing in the air. I followed behind in a half-hearted manner, being pulled along by her.
We approached Ellie’s mom, who was waiting at the entrance.
Our parents were always a bit late, so they would always wait inside, and this was the first time I could see Ellie’s mom.
Her dark black hair was different from Ellie’s, but it was just like mine. However, her beautiful face resembled Ellie’s.
“Wow…”
Even though I was not particularly attracted to blondes, I was instantly captivated by her appearance.
At that time, she seemed too young to be called a middle-aged woman, and whether it was then or now, she was incredibly beautiful, so it was not surprising.
If Ellie was a princess, her mom was like a queen.
Having brought me all the way to her mom, Ellie puffed up her cheeks and opened her mouth.
“Alicia, say goodbye.”
“Oh… Ah, so you’re Doyoon? The teacher sent us a lot of pictures of you two playing together. Thank you for being friends with Ellie. I’m Ellie’s mom.”
With a bright smile, her welcoming face greeted me.
“Hello! I’m Doyoon!”
“You’re brave, huh? Cutie… Ellie, did you have fun with Doyoon? Do you want to play more?”
“I’m tired. You want to play more.”
“I see. But Ellie, if you’re like this, Doyoon will be in a lot of trouble, right? Doyoon also has to go home with mom and dad… Can you say goodbye to your friend?”
“……”
With a face filled with disappointment, Ellie finally let go of my sleeve.
Then, she raised both arms towards Teacher Kim Minah before I could react.
Not knowing what was happening, I just looked around, while a perplexed Kim Minah also looked in my direction.
“What is it?”
Kim Minah was taken aback. Alicia, who always waved her hand and left with her mom, was suddenly extending her arms towards her today.
Unable to do anything about it, Alicia’s mom gestured with her eyes and mouth to give her a hug.
In response, Kim Minah hesitantly opened her arms and embraced Alicia. Such a small and beautiful child in front of her eyes.
And Alicia felt warmth in the embrace of the teacher who held her.
To Alicia, Kim Minah, her Sunflower class teacher, was a “good adult.”
Even after just three weeks, even at the age of five, he was such a good teacher that he could feel that he was doing it for himself.
When he was isolated, his heart was closed and he had no leisure, but now that he is close to Yi Doyoon, he has gained enough leisure to express his own feelings.
It was an embrace filled with gratitude, and the two exchanged farewells while sharing each other’s body temperature.
“Teacher. Bye-bye.”
“Yeah, yeah… Alisha, have a good trip. Don’t be a picky eater this weekend… You’ll see the teacher again on Monday.”
“Eliyah. Eliyeo.”
“Ah…! Uh, yeah! That… Eli.”
‘I really want to kidnap…’
To this beautiful child who opened her heart to him, Kim Mina felt a sense of satisfaction and happiness, tightly concealing her bad desires in her heart.
And after she let go.
To me, who had been watching all this with my eyes half-closed.
Eli once again spread her arms.
I don’t know what it means or why, but I follow the teacher.
– Hug tightly…
Spreading her arms, she faced me.
Someone with a similar, if not slightly larger body than mine, but so tender, warm, and with a good scent, a close friend.
I barely managed to hold back a cough as platinum hair tickled my nose, intoxicated by that scent.
As she held me tight like that, Eli’s beautiful voice resonated in my ear.
“kram.”
“Yeah?”
“This is kram. Hug.”
“Kram… Okay. Eli, bye-bye.”
“Bye-bye.”
It was a time when I didn’t have a concept of ‘romance’ yet, but I remember clearly that my heart was pounding.
We held hands, even grabbed onto each other’s arms, but it was the first time we embraced each other so closely.
With that, Eli held her mother’s hand and went back.
I later learned that the Swedish greeting ‘kram’ means a hug.
At that time, I…
Since that day, whenever Eli says the word ‘kram’ when we meet in the morning or before going home, I remember that I must hug her without fail.
Even after one year, even after five years, even after more than ten years have passed.
The magic word that made her hug him instinctively became a reflex.
One day.
As Ellie became more familiar with Korean culture, she stopped hugging everyone for greeting, which she didn’t do very often in the first place.
In the end, the only people who could receive her hugs were a few close same-s*x friends and me, excluding family.
Thanks to that, maybe around middle school.
“I’m so glad we became friends when Ellie was five.”
I must have thought that a hundred times a day.
Being able to hug Ellie’s delicate and soft body every time we met. Being able to act as if nothing had changed from the familiarity of the past, even as we grew older.
Truly, it was an incredible privilege.