Mushoku Tensei: A different path

{Rudeus POV}

"Yummy. This is just what I needed."

Munching on some cooked rice in my designated room, I enjoy my well-deserved break after a hard day at the field.

Over the course of the last one and a half months, I used my magic on a daily exhausting bases.

Alphonse asked me to help, but he didn't think that I would do something in the form of making the harvest getting better than ever before. Even making new soil for more nutritious harvest for the future.

The main thing I used it for was getting the field into growing the weed at a rapid pace.

But because my rice seeds need hotter environments to grow, my idea of growing it here was denied.

So for now, I'm the only one who wants to enjoy this marvelous yet incomplete meal. The soy-sauce is still missing.

After all that, I used Earth Magic to build some walls around the living areas of the camp. It was to honor the once known fortress capital Roa.

But it didn't just consist of me building walls. Bases for houses, watching towers, as well as numerous wells that I filled with water using Water Magic for the citizens.

For other materials that needed to be sent from one place to another I used Gravity Magic to lift them up in the air while delivering them.

Most of the time it was just lumber from a far off forest. The reason why it's so far off is that the entire region lost its trees as well.

Even if I'm able to create trees with only a few seeds, the cost of mana is too high to be proficient enough.

In that time, I also was taught how to ride a horse to be fast enough for delivery.

But of course, I didn't grab them with my actual hands while riding a horse, even if I can make them light.

I used my mana extension arms to lift them up behind me. Recently, I gave it a proper name to it. [Specter Grip].

An invisible extension of your body that would be great for spooky effects for haunted house theme-based school festivals.

However, I stumbled upon what might be the biggest flaw with my Touki beside its recoil damage.

You see, after I asked Ghislaine if she could explain to me what Touki does else besides enhance one's physical capabilities, she told me that it can be put on a weapon like a sword to make it sharper.

So, I thought that I could possibly cut the trees I deliver with a sword I took with me, since my Touki is so abnormally strong. The otaku in me couldn't wait to do a stereotypical samurai iaido.

But that bubble burst the moment I hit the tree with the sword.

And I do mean hit and not slash.

That's right. All it did is use the velocity of my sword to put a large dent on the tree.

When I tried showing it to Ghislaine, she used her Magic-Eye to see what's wrong. And she immediately found out what.

I can't make swords sharper at all. Quite the opposite, actually. Any sword I apply my Touki on becomes as dull as a metal-pole.

According to her, my layer is too thick to be made sharp. Like covering a blade with molted iron without any sharpening.

So, my lack of talent isn't the only thing that would've decided my role in a group.

But the good news is that, with my sharpened senses, I can 'feel' with my [Specter Force].

And I can use them to give me a wider range on some of my presence sensing.

My control and range with them became so much better. I can even reach a hundred of meters with them until I lose control.

Something that could end up better than Ruijerd's third eye, if it wasn't for the still limited range.

Whenever I'm done for the day or have some spare time, I trained on different types of magic.

Sometimes I train on trying to copy Orsted's Disturb Magic or that mana absorption window.

I successfully copied the former one, but struggle on trying to copy the latter one.

It may have something to do with him being a Dragon-race, so trying more won't work here.

But there is something of more importance that I have to develop. A type of magic that lets me store thing up, like a pocket dimension or something.

Why am I trying so hard to develop something like that?

That's because something went missing on the day I launched my second [Bright Sky Wave]. Something that I was very depressed about for a while.

The Holy Relic. It's gone. Forever.

I must've missed it when I leaped up into the sky on that day.

And thanks to my spell at the end, it's destroyed with everything else thanks to that grumpy Dragon God.

But what I didn't forget that time was to grab a few pieces from my destroyed staff, [Aqua Heartia].

Just some shards from the crystal that weren't any useful. They mainly have a memorial meaning for me.

I got very depressed about having lost not only the Holy Relic, but also my expensive staff.

Ruijerd even gave me the pendant I gave him back to me, so I got something else special back into my possession.

In order for something like this not to happen again, I need to get this magic to work perfectly.

Experimenting with many forms of mana manipulation I could think of, I found one method.

First, a plate of compressed mana has to be formed. The shape doesn't make much of a difference from what I can see, but that can be deceiving.

Second, Gravity Magic has to be used on the top half to push it upwards and the bottom half to push it downwards.

Watching with the naked eye, you will see only the air forming ripples like a water surface.

To see if I can put things inside without any problem, I conjured a perfect hand-sized cube and threw it into the ripples.

After closing and opening it, I realized that I probably shouldn't put my hand in it if I don't know whether it is safe or not. So, instead I used my [Specter Grip] to test it out.

Surprisingly, it was vast. Even if I extended it for ten minutes, my spell couldn't reach an end.

So to be sure it really is safe, I put my real hand in it.

Nothing extraordinary happened and I took it a step further by putting my head through it.

Bad idea.

Within that pocket dimension was no breathable air, and it was pitch dark. There was no source of light even from the opening I created.

I definitely have to improve on it when I have the time. It could be useful to suffocate some people within it.

Hm? Why am I working so hard on this type of magic?

Certainly not because I still feel depressed about having lost the Holy Relic or sulking about not having better control over my abnormal Touki.

Pretty sure it's something else.

While I was eating my meal, I felt a single tear go down my face.

"No. Stop. Eat your frustrations away." I said that as I violently ate the last of my rice.

Is this what Paul felt when he was in despair over not finding his family?

Probably not, since I cried over an object rather than a life.

Here is a better question. Why am I working for a place I can only call home in my memories? Because it's the last thing I will do to put old man Sauros's soul at peace.

There is little I can do for Eris, since she will be an adult soon. She will have to decide for herself what she wants to do.

And so far, she decided to train even intenser with Ruijerd AND Ghislaine.

I haven't seen her much mostly because of my work for the region. But, I could tell that she occasionally spied on me. She has been acting strange lately.

Could she go through some phase after getting told that her family is dead? Whatever it is, I can't help her if it's a girl's thing.

Ruijerd visited me from time to time, actually approaching me.

Ever since I told him about my body using ambient mana to boost my spells, he forbids me from training to absorb mana into my mana-pool faster.

He says that my curse might affect my personality a lot. Something about me being more angered than before the tantrum at Millishion.

Also, whenever I got angered my eyes started glowing. Which is weird but relatively irrelevant.

While I know why he is worried, he doesn't know the true reason why I've grown so short-tempered lately.

The only person in this world who knows that I'm a reincarnated human from another world, is Hitogami. And I would like to keep it at that. Even until I die.

Which makes me think if that girl with Orsted is still alive, or if she knows who I am.

Probably not. I am the complete opposite to that night. There are surely no indications that I am the fatass from planet earth.

Speaking of earth, I seem to be quite stressed and ended up having a recurring nightmare of my past life.

It's like the scenes Kagami showed me are on autoplay whenever I try to sleep soundly. Which is why I'm going through some insomnia.

There were nights where I just couldn't sleep because I was too afraid to see my traumatizing life.

And to spend the time I was awake more productive, I spend some time on making new figurines, like Ghislaine or Ruijerd and sometimes animals like cobras or wolves.

At some point, I even managed to make colored stones done thanks to some new Water Magic.

Something in the form of colored ink that I mix in with the stone while I conjure it.

Isn't magic just great? Making things so impossible into the possible.

Even to the point where you could cause the death of many people on one continent, or give yourself mental damage with your past self haunting you.

...

I honestly wanted to laugh at my own self. Where is a psychologist when you need one?

Even when he is dead, Kagami manages to haunt me with these memories.

This must've been his all plan along. Making me go crazy past his death.

Well, if he truly is dead. Some part of me is just wondering when he will pop up again.

In order to not go too insane from all that, I secretly used my pendant to pray towards the Goddess from my dreams. Then I give a second prayer to Roxy.

Even with the respect I have for Master Roxy, I could never deny the glory this deity has.

Anyway, I was about to prepare for my departure to the Northern Territory, until an unexpected event occurred that night.

***

"Rudeus. For my birthday present, I want you to become my family."

Eris is in my room, wearing what seems to be a nightgown.

Standing before me in her signature Boreas-pose, she promptly said something that came out as an order.

It's the perfect scenario for some of the 'things' my old self additively watched back on earth.

I can only give a strained smile while looking at her eyes, trying to avoid looking at her appealing body.

"What do you mean? We are already family. We're cousin."

Instead of a reply, she gave me a glare.

What? What did I say wrong? I only said the masked truth. This body is of that of her cousin.

"*Sniff* *Sniff*….. Is that perfume?" It is a strong smell that immediately flew into my nostrils.

If I recall correctly, it is the perfume that was made from the crops that used to be harvested back at when Buena Village still existed.

Which was also a main ingredient used for the aphrodisiac made in this region.

Surely, the Eris I knew wouldn't use such a thing.... right?

Standing up from my bed, I stood before Eris and grabbed her shoulders.

She was blushing a lot, while avoiding my eyes.

"Eris? You have to explain yourself."

"Our promise. Let's do it now."

"Our promise?"

Did we ever make any promises that include her current action?

Come on brain. You had your fun messing with me, so start working properly.

A promise that I made with Eris, that now shows itself with her wearing a nightgown with perfume on.

Then it sprang into my mind. She means the promise we made nearly three years ago. The one where she told me we could do it once I reached 15.

Back then, my goal of losing my virginity was strong, so I was pushing her too hard.

It ended up with me getting beaten and having given a promise for the future.

"Eris. This is two years too early. Besides, you shouldn't force yourself into any of this if you don't want to."

Her parent's influence on her most likely is forcing her to fulfill her promise.

But this is different. There is no need for her to go that far anymore.

"It's fine. I'm 15, so it's alright."

"That is not alright."

She might have developed some abandonment issues. It must be a heavy burden for her to lose her entire family in one strike.

Although it hasn't come to anything dramatic but I better get things cleared.

I have already set my mind, and it can't be changed anymore.

"Eris? Could you please look me in the eyes?"

She hesitated a bit, but slowly looked at me with her lips pressed together.

"You know that you are breaking that promise?"

"I said it's alright, okay." She got slightly mad.

Such logic is irrational. But she doesn't seem to realize that at all.

Guess that just shows how much growing she has to do.

"You are not thinking straight. These things are nothing to laugh about. You could end up regretting it afterward."

Her eyes slowly became a glare.

"Are you saying you don't want to do it?"

"Not if you force yourself to it."

"Didn't I tell you just now, I am fine with it. I wanna do it. Why are you refusing me?"

"Well, maybe I'm not fine with doing it with you while you're weak!"

She probably feels left alone from finding out that her family is dead.

If I were to do it with her now, I would just take advantage of her weakened state.

Eris's eyes then widened as tears started to form on their surface.

She then kicked me….. Between the legs?!

I was not ready for such an unholy move, so I took a full Boreas-kick to my nether region.

At the impact, my eyes rolled up, my head felt dizzy, and I was holding my 'sword', while falling to the ground.

All my other senses stopped, I felt like throwing up, and I was now enduring a different sort of pain than what I experienced after I transformed back.

"W-Why.... I h-hope.... I-I can s-still.... have.... k-k-kids."

My voice was so high-pitched that I feared that it stays like that forever.

Casting some Healing Magic, the pain eased up a little but still lingered.

What did my little guy do to deserve this? That kick should've been aimed at Kagami's nuts, not mine.

Besides, I haven't had any sexual thoughts about anything. Not even the times when I remembered why I hate Kagami and his vile antics. That was always such a down turner.

"Master Rudeus?" Somebody called out to me.

Turning my head a little, I saw Alphonse looking down at me.

"What happened to you? Were you attacked?"

He rushed over to me, checking if I was alright. But when he saw where my hands were placed, and how I was cowering, his monocle fell off his eye.

Nearly recovered, I stood up and ran out of my room.

Using my senses, I located Eris and went to her.

"Rudeus, wait."

When I neared the room she was in, I was stopped by Ruijerd.

"I need to talk to Eris, so move."

I was angered. So, my tone of voice was more rash than normal.

Ruijerd grabbed my shoulder and I looked at him.

"Whatever it is that happened between you two, she asked me to keep you away from her."

Ruijerd said in an attempt to calm me, but it did just the opposite.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

She wants some 'time alone'? From nearly robbing me of my manhood? Why is she acting as if she is the victim?

"You need to calm down. This isn't the time to get angered."

Is he still on about my curse having effects on my personality? The same excuse for all my different behaviors doesn't work.

'I am done with this shit. I won't deal with that brat anymore.'

Killing-intent came out of me and I stomped away.

Back in my room, I packed every of my belongings. And although it might be risky, I put the two books I have into my pocket dimension.

I can get these out any time I want, just have to get creative with my [Specter Force].

Once I was done, I put on the winter-gear that Alphonse prepared for me as thanks for helping the region so greatly.

He even gave me the robe I requested from him. Just a bland and singular colored gray robe without any decorations or ornaments.

The old robe would just remind me too much of my attempt to kill us all.

Finished packing my stuff, I opened the door of my room to be greeted by Ghislaine who looked like she was about to knock. I was so caught up in my rage that I didn't use my presence-sensing.

Looking me in my eyes, she flinched.

"What?" I rudely said to her.

"Did something happen? You unleashed some massive killing-intent just now. Also, Eris is crying in her room."

Crying? Over what? Kicking my nuts? She better feel sorry for that.

"Were you two fighting?"

"....." Should I really tell her about it?

Knowing how much she cares for Eris, and how angry she is at me for not caring about Phillip's and Hilda's death, she will likely take her side.

".....Not my problem."

I started activating my Touki to dash out of here.

My control over it currently only consists of suppressing and activating.

And it still ends up hurting me, but I can heal myself afterwords.

The pain may be excruciating, but nothing compared to what I had in Millishion or after turning back to normal the other day.

Nearing the entrance I kicked the door open and slowly stepped outside.

Some of the people were looking at me, but as soon as they realized who I am, they flinched and went off minding their own business.

My hair is brown from the roots to the middle and the rest white, while my ponytail is mostly white.

I swear, if I end up finding out that I am from an alien warrior race that changes its hair-color in every battle, I'm going to lose it.

It's a good thing it's going back to its original color so fast.

"Rudeus, wait."

Great. Now Ruijerd is after me as well. And turning around I saw Alphonse and Ghislaine behind him as well.

They all looked at me as if asking what I am doing.

"There is nothing left for me to do here anymore. So, I'm leaving this place to look for Zenith."

"And what about Eris?! Are you just gonna leave her while she's devastated?"

Ghislaine glared at me while protesting against my departure. So, I gave her a glare of my own.

"She is an adult. I can't keep on guiding her for the rest of her life. Just get her away from the reach of the nobles that are after her body. With me around, she will be in too much danger."

Easing up my expression, I shifted my gaze towards Ruijerd.

"Mister Ruijerd. You help us a lot escorting us until here."

I bowed slightly bowed since my luggage was still on my back.

"I thank you very much for everything you have done for us."

Standing straight again, I activated my Touki a second time and dashed off in incredible speed to the north.

Because of the wind whistling in my ears, I couldn't hear anything anymore. And that's good.

Deep in my heart I can feel the sense of lose more than before.

'Goodbye, Buena.'

The memories of my first day in this world popped into my head. The moment I realized that I have been blessed with a second chance in a new life. A chance to get all the goals I wished to achieve.

No tears were shed as I had to keep my mind set on my task.

Find Zenith.

***

{Eris POV}

Waking up with a bad mood, I opened my worn out eyes to see that I am in my room.

The nightgown that I chose for the special occasion I had planned was still on me.

"Why am I...? Wait!"

Did we do it? Have we become one?

Why are we in my room? I thought I went into his room.

"Rudeus?"

Flipping my blanket, I was disappointed to see that I was the only one laying in here.

"Where are you, Rude-" Then I remembered.

We didn't do anything at all. He said that I am weak. And because I felt insulted by that I kicked him between his legs.

I need to hurry up and apologize.

Without changing my clothes, I rushed out of my room.

"Eris?"

On my way to Rudeus's room I saw Ghislaine, but I paid her no mind.

"Rudeus, I'm-"

But when I reached his room, no one was in there. In fact, some of his stuff was even missing. The robe that I picked out for him back at Millishion was still here.

"Where is he?"

"He left."

I heard Ruijerd's voice answering my question.

"He..... left?"

"He mentioned that you should leave this place and left without listening to any of us." Ruijerd said with a difficult expression.

There is only one explanation that came into my mind.

He hates me. He hates me for being so mean to him while he had worked so hard on helping the region.

Not only that, but he did so much for me even while he wasn't acting as my tutor.

And all while dealing with so many problems on his own.

I am a hindrance for him. A baggage he carried throughout the whole trip.

All I did for him was fight while just expecting for him to deal with everything.

But now, just like the tutors before him, he has grown sick and tired of me. Even if he is one of the few people that I excepted after some time.

He reached his limit with me. It's probably because of what happened with Orsted.

I couldn't do anything besides getting thrown to a wall with just one move.

And while that happened, he fought for us and ended up nearly dying.

If it wasn't for his curse activating that moment, he would be forever dead. Just like my parents and grandpa, he would leave me.

When his body fell before Orsted, I wished so deeply that all of this was just a nightmare. I couldn't take it, so I cried out for help.

But then suddenly, Rudeus turned into a monster and saved me and Ruijerd.

He even launched a massive spell at Orsted that destroyed the mountains.

Rudeus is incredible, and yet he still deals with one problem after another all on his own.

And all I could do was stand by and cause new problems for him.

I'm pathetic. Letting the person I love the most suffer like that. Not even being able to protect or support him.

I was scared. Scared of losing him.

I desire the necessary strength to be able to stand by his side. The current me is weak, just like he said to me.

And thanks to the previous action of mine, I ruined everything. I pushed him off. He hates me now.

"What have I done?"

I not only made myself useless, I scared the person I wanted to spend my life with away.

But there is something Ruijerd said.

Rudeus wants me to leave this place. What does he mean?

But then it came to me.

He probably means that I can't get any stronger if I stay here.

That's it. He can't do it with me because he still wants a rematch with Orsted.

But where could I even go to train more?

Is there someone who is better than Ruijerd and Ghislaine to help me in my training?

I need to ask Ghislaine. Maybe she knows where I could go.

***

It's decided. I will go with Ghislaine to the Sword Sanctum, at the Holy Land of the Sword.

Over there, I have to convince Sword God to teach me.

My talent for swordsmanship can still rise high. So, I will train my hardest, just like Rudeus.

If I want to stay by his side, I need to train more than him.

He already started training after we visited the place where his village used to be. And I know why.

He wants to take revenge on Orsted, just like me. That training has to be meant for that.

I saw once how he even let his head vanish only to later appear and gasping for air.

Although I have no idea what that magic was, since it is Rudeus who trained on it, it has to be meant for something.

Even the other types of work he has done must be training for his rematch with Orsted.

He is amazing as always. Putting work and training together like it's nothing. Even training himself to sleepless nights that it even shows on his face.

And for that reason, I have to give it my best as well.

Ruijerd has decided to go around the north of the Continent to look for clues on his tribe.

Which means that our ways are all parting now.

He asked me to try talking to Rudeus. But with his curse, he is just too easy to get agitated.

I'm honestly scared over how much the current Rudeus will derive from his past self.

But I can't help him as he is now.

'Until we meet again Rudeus. I will always love you.'

And like that, our separate paths are now starting.

///