Master's Untamed Wife

Chapter 1430: Just A Failure



"If you wanna cry, I can lend you my shoulder," said Xiang Wai.

Song Xin'ai rubbed her temples with her eyes closed and her lips tilted up slightly, "Is crying gonna help?"

"Who knows? It might help." Continue your story on M-V-L

Song Xin'ai shook her head, "No, it's not gonna help." She opened her eyes and looked at Xiang Wai. She took her hands into her own and said, "Thank you for coming here to tell me first. And I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?"

"Maybe for being such a mother who had been blind all her life," answered Song Xin'ai in a self-deprecating tone. "I never had a good mother so I didn't know how to be a good mother to you either. Maybe I should have tried harder to learn but I didn't. I'm sorry that Mom's family was such a disappointment that you had to be separated from your dad and siblings for years. It was never my intention to hurt you, but I have hurt you enough."

Xiang Wai's tears fell down, no matter how hard she tried to hold them back. She just couldn't stop these tears from falling. It was like a faucet had opened and there was no way to stop it now.

"You don't have to apologize to me," said Xiang Wai. "I grew up well. I had my moments in life. Yes, I had some bitter ones too but I eventually got over them too. All in all, I have lived a happy life. Even if I thought you were not good to me, I always knew I could go and look for my dad or my brother to stand up for me. Anyway, I always knew that someone was there for me. But you..." Xiang Wai had a complicated look in her eyes as she looked at Song Xin'ai who didn't shed a single tear at that moment. "You had real tough in life. You had no one to stand by your side. And just when you thought you'd have a life partner, your mother destroyed that for you again. Don't you feel sorry for yourself?"

"Feeling sorry for myself won't change anything," said Song Xin'ai. "I have been standing alone for so long that I have gotten used to it. When I first got together with your dad, I was very scared. I was insecure. Not because I doubted his feelings for me but because I feared that if I learned to lean on him, what if I forgot how to stand on my own again? I often sabotaged my own happiness. You don't have to feel sorry for me." She touched Xiang Wai's head lovingly, "I want you to go back home now and get a good rest. Don't think about this matter anymore."

"But..."

"Leave it to me," Song Xin'ai interrupted her words. "This has nothing to do with you. It's my matter, let me handle it on my own. I promise you, I won't let you down this time."

"If you did anything to the Song family, people are gonna talk and point fingers at you for being ungrateful and unfilial."

"I have never feared any of that. Besides, I live in the research center most of the time. People don't have the habit or time to gossip. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me."

Xiang Wai didn't know if she should listen to her or not but seeing the firm look on Song Xin'ai's face, she had no way of going against it either.

"Then let me know if you need any help."

"I am your mother," reminded Song Xin'ai. "But still, thanks for the offer. It means a lot to me. Take care of yourself. Also... Don't tell anyone else about this for now."

"I wasn't really planning on doing that," answered Xiang Wai. She got up to leave and looked at the half-eaten instant noodle bowl. She looked at her mother and said, "How about I make you something else to eat?"

Song Xin'ai shook her head, "I'm not hungry anymore. Go. It's already this late. I'd have loved to ask you to stay the night but I don't have a guest room. Would you like to sleep on my bed?"

"No," replied Xiang Wai, and with a long look at Song Xin'ai, she finally left. But even when she left, she was still thinking how her mother was feeling right now. She knew that if one day she knew that her mother betrayed her, she'd be in a rage that would make her want to burn the world but Song Xin'ai looked way too calm.

No wonder everyone said that she was the most emotional and sentimental person in the Xiang family. She really got excited easily.

Once Xiang Wai left, Song Xin'ai sat in the same place in a daze for a long time. Maybe she sat there for an hour or two before she slowly let out a turbid breath. Getting up, she walked into her bedroom and opened a drawer to take out an old picture with rough edges. She looked at the kind-looking old woman holding a small girl in her hands and said, "Grandma, let's break the promise between us. I don't wanna protect the Song family anymore. I let it go when I was bullied because she is my mother and she gave me birth so I could take anything. But she dared to extend her hands to my daughter. I can never forgive this."

Song Xin'ai opened her phone and looked at the wallpaper which was the photo of her three children. She got this picture from Raelle's wedding. All three of her kids were smiling happily and every time she looked at this picture, it could make her forget anything else. But at this moment, her eyes teared up and tears ran down her face without a break making her vision blurry.

"I'm more than just a failure as a mother," she whispered in a choked voice.


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