Master, This Poor Disciple Died Again Today

Setting the empty bowl on the step, Hui let out a burp and stood. Now that my important business is done… where’s the administrative building?

“Hui!” Mei reappeared at the door, holding a paper package.

“Sis! Thank you!” Hui bowed and accepted it.

She waved back and disappeared inside.

He wandered out, dodging the paths again and moving with confidence. If only I had a clipboard—cough! No one has clipboards in this world! Carefully, he wound his way back to the plaza with the library. At the plaza’s edge, he parked himself behind a large tree and peeked around, searching out the other buildings’ signboards. Merit Hall… probably not. Hall of Swords… nope. Heavenly Records… eh? Then what’s the library? What’s the difference between the Heavenly Records building and the library? Ah, there! Administration Building. Perfect.

Hui brushed himself down, picked a leaf out of his hair, and glanced around. Seeing no-one, he pulled out two big buns from the paper package and stuffed them into his robes. Undoing his ponytail, he tossed his hair over his shoulders and bit his lips, drawing the blood to the surface to redden them. As a final step, he delivered a sharp slap to his cheeks, just enough to leave them pink. So prepared, he marched out. Shoulders squared, head held high, he merged with the flow of other cultivators through the plaza. No one spared him a second glance.

Ha! You think you can intimidate this great Weiheng Hui, small Peak Lord? I’ve walked among debt collectors as a mere child! Held hands with hitmen from the underworld since I was small! Your little threats are nothing before me!

And anyways, I have Master.

So thinking, he strode into the administrative building with a smile. Unlike the plaza outside, the lobby laid mostly empty. A few cultivators stood at one of the three desks in the lobby, each attended by an outer sect cultivator. Hui chose the one with the shortest line and joined in.

Slowly, the line wound down. He walked up to the desk and shot the cultivator on the opposite side a winning smile. Pitching his voice up, he said, “My name is Xiao Mei. I was sent to pick up Weiheng Hui’s stipend.”

“Xiao Mei?” The outer sect disciple’s eyes swept over him. Her brows furrowed.

“Yes. See, I have his seal right here.” Hui reached into his robes and pulled it out.

The outer sect disciple stared at his chest.

Hui glanced down. The bun had twisted around under his armpit. Casually, he reached into his robe and adjusted it back into place. “Ah, haha, you know how it is.”

The outer sect disciple’s eyes grew larger. She stared at him, almost afraid.

Hui coughed. “The—the stipend?”

“R-right. Er, he hasn’t ever picked it up before, I don’t think… um, I’m not authorized to hand out more than a hundred gold to a representative, is that fine?”

Wh-what? More than a hundred gold? And that’s not even all? Hui hid his shocked expression and bowed instead.“No, no, that’s quite enough. Thank you so much.”

The outer sect disciple scurried off. Waiting, Hui leaned on the counter and drummed his fingers on it. He made eye contact with a disciple at the next desk over, who openly stared at him.

Huh? Did the buns shift again? Hui glanced down at the buns. Everything sat where it should, lovely curves shaping his chest into something more graceful. He looked back up at the disciple and made a face. Huuuuh, no one likes a stare-er. Is my beauty too much for you? Did you fall in love at first glance? Sorry, but this Xiao Mei is a Xiao Hui in reality, you know.

The disciple tore his eyes away at last. Bowing to his desk’s assistant, he hurried out of the building.

Hui stuck his tongue out at the man’s back. Yeah, run away, you pervert.

The outer sect disciple hurried back. She held out a weighty sack. “Thanks for waiting.”

“No, no, thank you,” Hui replied, smiling. He accepted it and tucked it into his robes. Hopefully this is enough to pay Qin Xixing. I hate to think what she’d do to me if it isn’t!

“Er… ma’am, your… uh…” the outer sect disciple stuttered.

Hui glanced down. One of his buns had fallen all the way to his belt.

“Oops!” Covering his mouth with one hand, he let out a giggle and hoisted it back into place. Before anything else could fall apart, he scurried out of the Administrative Building and hurried back out into the sect.

In the middle of the plaza, a hand caught his shoulder. Hui stumbled to a stop. “What? Er—” he coughed and forced his voice up. “What?”

“Just now, you drew out Weiheng Hui’s stipend, right? A friend told me so,” Chang Bolin asked him with an earnest expression.

Hui paled. He lifted a hand to shield his face with a sleeve and shied back, playing coy. Hello, Mr. Policeman, I have a stalker! Was that guy earlier one of Chang Bolin’s henchmen? Fuck, how many henchman does this two-bit villain have? “It’s none of your business.”

“Oh, no, I’m sorry. I have no issue with you. I’m sure he forced you into it somehow. Would you mind showing me to your meeting place? I have a letter to deliver to him.” Chang Bolin’s earnest expression twisted. He half-drew out a letter from his robe. Hui caught a glimpse of CHALLEN… before Chang Bolin slid it back away.

A letter of challenge? Fuck that noise. This small disciple values his life, okay? You can go challenge someone else, but leave me alone! Externally, he smiled and bowed. “Your friend must have misheard. I drew out Wenhong Yi’s stipend just now, not Weiheng Hui.”

“Oh.” Disappointment flashed over Chang Bolin’s face. With a wave, he dismissed Hui. “Never mind.”

Hui nodded a little deeper, keeping his head down.

A bun tumbled out of his robe and bounced off the ground.

Chang Bolin stared.

Hui grew paler. His stomach sucked in. A thousand mud-fucking-grass horses! Would it kill you to stay in place, you stupid bun?

“Excuse me, ma’am? I don’t believe I got a good look at your face earlier,” Chang Bolin requested. Tension burned in his voice.

“Aha, what business could you have with this humble servant?”

“Look up, please?”

Hui pivoted on his heel and dashed off, hurtling down the peak.

Behind him, Chang Bolin screamed, “Weiheng Huiiiiiiii!”

Reaching into his robes, Hui tossed the remaining bun behind him. Chang Bolin fell back with a soft poof. Howling in rage, he ripped the bun off his face and sped up.

I just need to make it to Cauldron Peak. If I can cross over into the next peak’s barrier, Chang Bolin shouldn’t be able to follow me! He raced off, feeding qi into his system to speed his steps. Each step ate up ten feet. Tearing past cultivators and swerving around trees, he chased off the well-trodden roads and down his hidden path toward the foot of the peak.

Less familiar with Hui’s path, Chang Bolin struggled to keep up. “You waste! Where did you get those buns? Don’t tell me, our dining hall?”

“No, I made them myself! Don’t you recognize my handiwork?” Hui shouted back. Faintly, regret struck his heart. What a waste of elder sister Mei’s cooking. I shouldn’t have thrown that second bun at Chang Bolin.

He rushed into the open area at the bottom of the peaks, the small part of the upper sect that technically belonged to the outer sect. Pushing himself, he found the qi for one last burst of strength and blew through into Cauldron Peak.

Hui turned around. “Come at me, kid!”

Face twisted in hideous anger, Chang Bolin charged at him.

Inches before he reached Hui, his face smashed into an invisible wall. Chang Bolin staggered back, stunned.

Hui laughed, a hand over his mouth in a futile attempt to hide his grin. “Oh gods above, if only I had a smartphone here…” Cultivator smashes face into barrier! 50,000 views!

Chang Bolin snarled at him. He threw the challenge letter at Hui. Unlike his body, the letter passed through the barrier and drifted to Hui’s feet. “Face me in a duel, you coward!”

“No. You can’t make me,” Hui replied.

“Then everyone will know you for the coward you are!” Chang Bolin snapped.

“Good.” Ha, you think this disciple cares? Brat, I’m no hero. I’ve been a coward since my last life and until today. This poor disciple only wants to enjoy his small life, okay?

Chang Bolin’s lip twitched. He scowled. “Sect rule 152, subsection 78. Turning down a duel from a cultivator at your same level is tantamount to losing the duel. Losing a duel recognized by a Peak Lord is tantamount to giving up your spot in the inner sect. For an inheriting disciple, you won’t fall out of the inner sect, but you will no longer be recognized as an inheriting disciple.”

Hui blinked. “Huh?”

“Don’t you know the sect rules? Huh?” Chang Bolin taunted.

Who the hell wrote that shitty rule? What is this supposed to do? Is becoming an inner sect disciple a suicide pact with all my fellow disciples?

Reading his face, Chang Bolin scoffed. “Of course, I also stake this on the duel, along with my—both our—lives. With nothing to enforce order upon the sect and the elders too busy to correct every tiny spat, this rule is meant to capture situations like ours. Situations where two disciples fall so far out of harmony that they cannot live in the same sect. Rather than allow both disciples to dodge one another’s duels and allow the bad blood to brew until it destroys the sect from the inside out, this way, even a disciple in bad faith, such as yourself, cannot simply duck a duel recognized as rightful by the sect’s higher powers.”

Hui paused. I guess it makes sense. Let’s say I was a maiden, for example. If Chang Bolin had forced himself upon me in his terrible jealousy, wouldn’t it be horrible if he was allowed to dodge my attempts at justice, dodge behind the Peak Lord like he did, and hide inside the sect forever? Even in the modern world, cases like those are often called he-says-she-says, isn’t that the case? I wouldn’t trust the elders to resolve it properly, even if they knew everything. Favoritism, bias… this way, all I have to do is challenge him formally, and at the end of the day, ‘might makes right’ and everything else falls by the wayside. In a cultivation world, where there’s no disparity in might except based on one’s natural potential, such a policy almost makes sense.

Of course, it still screws over those born weak, who will never see justice. But this is a cultivation world. That’s only natural.

Hui sighed and picked up the challenge letter. “Then I suppose I accept.”

“Good. Meet me in the outer sect’s challenge fiel—”

Hui tched, cutting him off. “Incorrect. Sect rule 231, subsection 1103. The challenged sets the time and the place of the duel.”

Chang Bolin frowned. “Is… is that a rule?”

No. But I knew it—you don’t know all the rules. You looked up that specific rule to try to get me! Sorry, Chang Bolin, but this poor disciple was bullied with legalese for decades! When it comes to bluffing with rules, I’ve got years on you!

Hui waved a hand flippantly. “Of course it is. Ah, disciples who break this rule can consider themselves as forfeiting the duel. And you know the consequences of that, I take it?”

Chang Bolin grit his teeth. “Fine. Set the time and the place.”

I can’t push it too far. I don’t want him to call my bluff. Hui rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Then let’s meet in three days, in Starbound Peak’s official arena.”

“S-starbound Peak?” Chang Bolin stuttered.

“Is there a problem?” Hui asked casually.

“Are you stupid? I have the homefield advantage!”

Hui smiled gently. “All the better to humiliate you when I crush you like the toad you are.”

Chang Bolin’s face flushed red with anger. “Weiheng Hui!”

“Then, in three days’ time.” With a jaunty wave, Hui strutted off.

“You’re the one who’ll be humiliated! Prepare yourself!” Chang Bolin shouted after him.

Hui took a deep breath. The first hints of a plan began to form in his head. He twisted his lips, lost in thought, putting the pieces together.

At last, a devious smile crawled over his face. Oh, Chang Bolin. When I’m done with you…