Master, This Poor Disciple Died Again Today -- Complete!

Riding in his new master’s arms, Hui gripped tight to the man’s robes. Unlike on the sheet, the wind whipped past, slamming into his little body. He huddled close, squeezing his eyes shut against the rush. Wu sped up again, whipping the air from Hui’s body and forcing Hui back against his arm. Hui held on tighter, struggling to draw breath. “M—master!”

Wu slowed. Hui gasped and sucked at the air, grateful. Catching his breath, he wiped his mouth, then peered up at Wu, so much larger than him. “Master, why did you pick me?”

Eyes on the distant horizon, Wu blinked. “Your face.”

“H-huh?” Hui stuttered.

Wu glanced at him. “Anyone can cultivate. Not everyone has a handsome face.”

“B…but, if I cultivate, won’t I grow more handsome anyways?” Hui tried. Anyone can cultivate? What world do you live in, master? Isn’t the whole selection committee going out and picking children because it’s not just anyone who can cultivate?

Wu paused thoughtfully. He looked at Hui, then shook his head. “Even if you fail to cultivate, at least your face won’t hurt my eyes.”

Hui slammed his face into Wu’s shoulder, resisting the urge to scream. What’s wrong with my master’s head? Does he have a hole in his brain? “Why me, and not a girl, then? If all you want is a pretty face, won’t a girl be much more beautiful?”

“Rejected. A pretty girl may grow up and want to dual-cultivate with me. I don’t want to risk slowing myself down for infatuation’s sake.”

Isn’t dual cultivation supposed to speed up your cultivation? Though—bleh! I shouldn’t say that. Xiao Hui is five. He didn’t read all those filthy stallion novels that I did.

“We’re here,” Wu announced. His sword plunged down toward the fifth, and largest, peak. Hui held on and squeezed his eyes shut until his master lowered him to solid ground.

They stood in a small clearing. In the center of the clearing, a small but neat hut sat. White walls bore a thatched roof. A small well descended into the earth nearby, protected by a low wooden barrier. All manner of wildlife scurried about the forest around them. A few of the more inquisitive animals paused to watch their arrival, small forms huddled on branches or in undergrowth, glinting eyes like stars in the forest's night.

Hui turned in a circle. A single narrow path led down the mountain. He pointed. “Is that where the other disciples live?”

“Other disciples? You’re my first,” Wu replied.

Hui froze. “You mean, you live alone on this peak? Who cooks? Who does the wash? Who draws the water?”

“I don’t need to eat. I can clean my own clothes with qi. There’s a well right there,” Wu replied.

Hui bowed respectfully. “Requesting from Master, disciple requires food.”

“There’s a cafeteria on Starbound Peak if you can’t cook,” Wu said, pointing.

Hui followed his finger from the fifth peak to the fourth, the one where disciples practiced in fields. His eyes traveled down, down, down the height of their peak, then all the way back up Starbound Peak, second largest of the peaks. Hui swallowed. I’m going to die.

He turned to Wu again, hopeful. “Master, that’s a long walk for this poor disciple.”

“Good training,” Wu said. He turned away.

“Wait, master! Do you have any hints to impart to this poor disciple? A manual, perhaps?” Hui asked, grabbing at his robes. It’s standard, right? Even the shoddiest cultivation novel hands out manuals or training at the beginning.

Wu flicked his robes out of Hui’s grip before his grubby hands could close around them. He looked down at him with disdain. “Cultivation is the easiest thing imaginable. A disciple of mine should require no hints.”

“I… what?” Hui stared blankly. Don’t tell me. This Weiheng Wu fellow… he’s a genius, isn’t he? Such a genius that he doesn’t understand what the ordinary person requires. Such a genius that he can’t even comprehend of cultivation as difficult.

Hey, world! Where’s my golden finger? Where’s my cheat skill? I’m staring at a cheat right here, you can’t tell me you don’t hand them out!

“If that’s all, I’ll return to seclusion. I only came out because the sect leader wouldn’t stop pestering me about gathering disciples. Now he has no reason to stop me from entering seclusion,” Wu announced smugly. His sword unsheathed itself, and he mounted it.

“Master, wait!” Hui shouted. I’m an ordinary five year old boy right now! I’m going to starve to death on this mountain, or get eaten by something in the woods, or—!

Wu paused just a moment. “Oh, that’s right. Treat the hut as your own home.” With that, he whooshed off into the distance.

Despairing, Hui stared after him. Is this the end of my bright future as a cultivator?

Something howled in the not-so-distant forest. Hui jumped and scurried into the hut, slamming the door behind him. Thin doors and walls threatened to cave in at any moment. He cast around for something to reinforce them.

Nothing. A small space, a bed just big enough for Wu, and nothing else. Not even a chopstick.

Hui dropped to his knees, defeated. This… this is too much. This poor disciple is going to die long before he becomes a cultivator. Here I thought I was going from a tiny village to a cultivator’s paradise—what a joke! I should have stayed in the village.

He clenched his fists and pushed himself up. No. This is still better than my first life. I persevered through that, I can persevere through this, too! There has to be a way. I can still survive and become a cultivator!

Outside the hut, something howled again, closer this time. Hui dove under the bed and curled up, hiding his head under his arms. Tomorrow. Tomorrow, I’ll figure it all out. Tonight, I need to stay alive!