Malfunctioning Utopia

Chapter 30: Humanity

"F***, so I said all that for nothing?"

Sun Jack rubbed his temples in frustration. While Tapai could banter and argue like a person, even coming off as genuinely witty, it wasn’t human.

Judging by Tapai smashing Song 6’s head earlier and shooting Four Ai in the leg, it was clear the robot had no capacity for empathy or emotional understanding.

Seeing Sun Jack’s exasperated expression, Tapai became indignant.

" (｀д′) F*** off! You set me to guard mode. In my system settings, your right to life has the highest priority. What the hell was I supposed to do? If you’ve got a problem, dig up the programmer who wrote that code and scatter his ashes!"

"As your activator, shouldn’t my commands override the system’s settings?" Sun Jack retorted as they strolled along the bustling underground pedestrian street.

"More or less," Tapai replied, brushing past a spider-like robot.

"What do you mean ‘more or less’? Change the setting. Next time something like this happens, no more shooting our teammates in the leg."

"Even then, consult me first!"

"You sure? That’ll lower your survival rate. Besides, I’m the bad guy here, so why are you objecting?"

"You can’t just look at absolute benefit. We’re not cold-blooded robots."

Tapai switched to system communication. "(¬､¬) But I am a robot."

Sun Jack was momentarily speechless. He sighed, exasperated. "Fine, but can you at least do as I say? I know you’re a robot, but we can’t let others realize that you are."

"If your identity gets exposed, we’re both done for," Sun Jack continued to reason. This time, they were lucky it was just Four Ai, someone easy to brush off. But what about next time? What if surveillance footage caught them, and someone connected the dots?

In this hyper-connected society, even minor behavioral inconsistencies could be flagged by big data. Without proper disguise, Tapai’s true nature would eventually be discovered.

"It’s not just this. For other things too, you need to be more... detailed. Stop acting like a robot. Pretend to be human."

Tapai folded its arms and flashed a glowing middle finger on its screen. "Details? Do you even know how much I cost to manufacture? You want ‘details’? Buy me more memory and upgrade my CPU, you broke-a**!"

"Aren’t you supposed to learn and iterate your logic system? What’s the issue now?"

"Data needs a place to exist. Do you know how much memory a human brain’s neural network translates to? 1,000 terabytes! Do you know how much memory I have? Want me to delete some language functions to make space?"

"Never mind, forget I said anything." Sun Jack’s eyes drifted to a nearby stall advertising body bags, trying to think of a solution.

Just then, a graffiti paint display caught his attention. Eyeing Tapai, Sun Jack bought a can of blue spray paint and sprayed a giant exaggerated smiley face on the robot’s left chest plate.

After appraising his handiwork, he wasn’t satisfied. He bought a skull-patterned coat from another shop and draped it over Tapai.

After all the fussing, Tapai’s appearance seemed marginally more personable—at least to Sun Jack.

"Fine. I do have some reserved memory. I could clear some to add a bit more ‘detail,’" Tapai said suddenly.

"Really? That’s great!" Sun Jack patted Tapai’s shoulder enthusiastically. "Don’t worry. Once I’ve finished my surgery, I’ll save up and get you upgraded."

The two froze for a moment, staring at each other.

"What are you looking at? Authorize it already!"

"Oh, right!"

Emerging from the underground pedestrian street, they found themselves on a wide road teeming with unique and eclectic vehicles weaving through the pouring rain. ŕ𝘈ɴỐBΕs̩

"Where to next?" Tapai asked.

Sun Jack thought for a moment, watching the rain. "Is Song 6 live streaming right now?"

"Yes."

"Good. Track his location. We’re paying him a visit."

Two hours later, they cornered Song 6PUS at a subway exit.

Seeing Sun Jack and Tapai, Song 6’s face paled for a split second before he broke into a toothy grin, showing off his gold teeth. "Bro~! What a coincidence! Heading home on the subway too?"

"Yeah, what a coincidence," Sun Jack replied coldly, remembering Song 6’s disappointed expression when he’d seen Sun Jack awake on the stream earlier.

Flanking him, Sun Jack and Tapai each grabbed one of Song 6’s arms and dragged him out of the subway.

"Come on, come on. This isn’t the place for a chat. Let’s find somewhere to sit."

They eventually chose a lively izakaya humorously named "The Leftovers of the Rich."

Seated on a bench, Sun Jack casually scanned the bar’s QR codes, flipping through the menu without speaking.

Song 6PUS broke the silence first. "Bro! I didn’t know you were such a beast, taking down nine AAB units like it was nothing! I knew I saw potential in you!"

"You’re so amazing. From now on, you take the lion’s share, and I’ll take the scraps. Together, we’ll dominate the Metropolis—make money with our eyes closed!"

As he rambled, Song 6’s hand sneakily rested on Sun Jack’s shoulder.

"I wish. But right now, I can’t manage that," Sun Jack said, pausing for effect. "Maybe when I recover my memories, I’ll figure it out."

Hearing this, Song 6PUS’s face briefly flickered with disappointment.

Just then, a robotic server in a kimono brought over appetizers. Song 6PUS immediately stuffed his face, then stood up. "Well, our business is settled. I’ve got stuff to do, so I’ll head out. Your treat this time, I’ll treat next time!"

"Sit down!" Sun Jack’s cybernetic hand grabbed his collar, pulling him back onto the bench.

"Seriously, bro? Over a little bill? I’m broke. I need my money for, uh, nighttime activities," Song 6PUS whined, feigning innocence.

"Who said anything about the bill? Your business might be done, but mine isn’t."

Sun Jack leaned closer. "You told me the intel was rock solid, that there were only six robots in the villa. Care to explain?"

Tapai’s cold metallic arm rested on Song 6PUS’s shoulder, sending a clear signal. Realizing he couldn’t talk his way out, Song 6’s face contorted in mock agony.

"Not my fault, bro! I didn’t mean for this to happen! If the mission failed, I wouldn’t have earned a single 0.0001@ either!"

"Exactly," Tapai chimed in. "Jack, don’t be so inconsiderate. Sure, we almost died, but poor Song 6 here? He almost lost his most beloved @!"

Grinning, Tapai gave Sun Jack a thumbs-up and discreetly sent him a message: “Details.”