Malfunctioning Utopia

Chapter 19: Eating Crap is Hard

“Pfft~” Sun Jack nearly choked to death on his water. His face turned bright red as he pounded on his chest with his fist. Looking back at the desk, he almost thought he had misheard.

However, the AA girl wasn’t angry at all. Instead, she puffed out her chest confidently, as if removing her uterus was some kind of accomplishment to be proud of.

“I… what the h*ll…” Sun Jack’s pupils trembled as he stood there, utterly stunned by what he was witnessing.

Meanwhile, the conversation continued in the distance.

“Alright, the next question. You know our company’s work hours are short—just 8 hours a day, half of the usual schedule. So, are you willing to stay in a Level 6 neuro-stimulated state during working hours?”

This made AA hesitate. “Do you mean… taking drugs?”

“What drugs! It’s not addictive! We call it a work supplement!” The high-heeled woman slammed the table, scaring AA into silence. “If you don’t want to do it, there are plenty of others who will!”

“But I… I don’t have money… I’m still paying off loans… I can’t afford work supplements…”

The HR woman, casually examining her flowing manicure, softened her tone slightly.

“Don’t worry about that. To support new hires, the company offers low-interest loans. By the time you get your first week’s salary, you’ll be able to pay it back.”

Hearing this, AA clutched the hem of her clothes tightly, her face full of struggle.

While she hesitated, Sun Jack had already stood up. These ridiculous demands? Was this some kind of joke?

Just as he was about to find an excuse to leave, a Black man nearby suddenly stood up, looking ecstatic.

“I’m willing! Not only will I take work supplements, but my pineal gland and hypothalamus have already undergone Level 2 modifications. I don’t even need to sleep! As long as you give me this job, I’ll work five hours of overtime for free!”

Hearing this, Sun Jack’s trembling pupils darted toward the door. This place was too terrifying—he needed to get home.

“And you? Compared to these two, how much are you willing to contribute to the company?” The high-heeled woman finally turned her gaze to the last candidate: Sun Jack.

Sun Jack stopped and turned around, smiling at her and nodding toward the other two. Then, he slammed his paper cup to the ground, pointed angrily at the HR woman, and shouted, “I’ll contribute jack sh*t!”

“What the f***?! What’s all this nonsense about removing uteruses and borrowing money to take drugs for work? What kind of capitalist hellscape is this?! Satan would have your logo tattooed on his back! And he’d keep his eyes shut because open eyes wouldn’t intimidate anyone! Is this how you run a company?!”

The HR woman chuckled coldly and stood up, looking Sun Jack up and down with disdain.

“This is the Metropolis, the Freedom City. Our company has the freedom to set its conditions, just as you have the freedom to reject them. Isn’t that fair?”

“Fair? My a**! You’ve got a death wish, don’t you? Do you want to end up hanging from a lamppost?!”

Seeing the argument escalate, the other two candidates quickly distanced themselves from Sun Jack, fearing it might cost them their interviews.

Uninterested in further debate, the HR woman waved her hand coldly. “Security.”

With a trembling thud, a security guard in a bulging suit walked in.

“Your interview has been unsuccessful. Please leave the premises.” Standing at an imposing 2.5 meters tall, the guard loomed over Sun Jack like a human tank, speaking politely.

Even without x-ray vision, Sun Jack could tell the guard was armed to the teeth with combat prosthetics under that suit.

Sun Jack laughed bitterly, pointing at the guard and then back at the HR woman.

“Security? You call that security? Hah, I’m impressed, I really am.”

Frustrated, Sun Jack stormed out of the building. The first thing he did was try to report the company to the Labor Bureau through his system. Instead, a giant “404” error smacked him in the face. R𝓪₦𝙤𐌱Ё𝘚

“What the…?” Before he could finish, his neural system automatically searched for the reason.

The result? The Metropolis is a Freedom City, where every company and individual has the right to maximum liberty. Institutions like the Labor Bureau, which interfere with corporate freedom, are considered obstacles to free market development and therefore don’t exist.

“What the hll! What the hll, hll, hll!!! Is there no one normal in this godforsaken place?!” Sun Jack felt like he was going insane.

Just then, Tapai approached. “What happened? You think the salary’s too high, so you fired them?”

Ignoring him, Sun Jack turned to look at the shabby office entrance. “D*mn it! I refuse to believe it! Tapai, find me another job! There are 30 million people here—I don’t believe they’re all like this!”

Jobs that met Sun Jack’s standards were scarce. By the time they found another one, it was almost dark.

This time, Sun Jack was the first to be interviewed. The cold-faced HR woman looked him over and asked, “Are you willing to remove your uterus for this company?”

“Remove what?! Are you blind or something?! I’m a f***ing man!!” Sun Jack yelled, slamming his paper cup down in anger.

“Oh, my apologies. With the recent gender-reversal trend, I must have misjudged. Let me rephrase: Sir, are you willing to remove your penis for this company?”

“BANG!” Sun Jack landed a steel fist straight into her face.

Two hours later, with a bruised face, Sun Jack trudged through the pouring rain toward his apartment. His eyes were vacant, his expression lifeless. Everything he’d experienced today had shattered his worldview, even more so than yesterday’s madness.

How could the daily grind of a nine-to-five job be more absurd than Song 6’s life-and-death escapades?

He couldn’t wrap his head around it. Was this even his world anymore? How had things become this way?

A sudden firework explosion snapped him out of his thoughts. Turning, he realized he’d unknowingly wandered back to Club 69, where Song 6 had taken him before.

At that moment, the club’s doors opened, and the AA girl from earlier stumbled out, looking utterly defeated.

As she stepped into the rain, she finally broke down, covering her face and sobbing uncontrollably.

Sun Jack had enough of his own problems to deal with. He had no energy to care about others. But as the sound of her cries grew more heart-wrenching, he let out a deep sigh and turned around.

Approaching the crouched girl, he asked, “What’s wrong? Are you okay? Come on, pull yourself together.”

AA choked back her sobs and shakily pointed toward the club. “They… they said I don’t have a uterus, so I’m not qualified to work as a s*x worker! And I couldn’t find any other job… Waaaah!”