Life in a new Kingdom

Lukia gently held my cloak to her face. It seemed to calm her down, but I was still feeling hot and bothered by her earlier. Sweat drips from my forehead, and I continue to keep my legs closed and my hands on my lap. A long sigh pours from my mouth.

"Are you going to be okay...?" The sound of her voice was low and hard to hear at first, but I understood it. I turned my attention toward the lying woman in front of me on my bed with a worried look.

My voice came out soft, and I coughed a bit before clearing my throat and speaking clearly. "The situation almost got really dangerous there. You didn't help."

Lukia giggles and hangs on a pitiful smile before nuzzling more into my cloak. I would be lying if it didn't make me feel comfortable seeing her like that with my cloak. How easily she eased into it was faster than anything before to calm her down. Her eyes peaking over the cloak met mine.

She adjusted to sit up and hug her knees with the cloak wrapped in front of her. "Sorry, I am such a burden on you especially. You seem to be the one there for me the most right now..."

"Enough with the apologies." I cut her off from saying anything more. My body more or less relaxed and I crawled and sat next to her, my back pressed against the wall. If it were me in her shoes I would try to understand and move on. But she clearly was a whole other story. I know her parents were very dear to her but her odd attachment to people is both a curse and a blessing for her.

"Do you hate me for trying that?" Her voice sounded cold. She is desperate but also scared. I gently pressed my hand onto her head and rubbed softly. Her face softened, and she avoided my gaze.

"It wasn't flattering... But I understand what you are going through. So...let's just talk about it. Let it all out in the air. I'm going to let you get it all off your chest and I won't leave your side for any of it."

"What's more to say..? My father is dead... My mother suffered for so long while I thought she had died the entire time. I didn't even have the courage to put her out of that misery! You had to do it for me! What kind of daughter doesn't give her family the peace they deserve!" Her fingers press deep into her arms, and the skin starts to turn red. Some of her nails dig in deep enough to break the skin with blood leaking out of them. I grasp her fingers and pry them away. Her eyes filled with tears, and she stared at my hands.

"A daughter who loved her so much that she couldn't kill her regardless of the situation. I think that speaks more than someone who can...just my personal opinion. I didn't even get a proper goodbye with my mother when my father took me to Heistorm, to our home. You got to see her one last time and say goodbye despite the situation. In the end, she got to know her daughter was alive and well before she passed on."

"Then why does my chest hurt so much... Why does my heart feel numb..."

I prepare to speak, yet my breath trails off before seeing that her entire body is shaking. I gently pulled her close to me and let her curl into my chest. A cold and wet feeling spread to my chest. Sitting there for several minutes, letting her cry out until she could only whimper. She may be older than I am, but that doesn't mean she can't cry from her pain.

After a few more moments and her whimpers slowly vanish, she moves away from me, wiping the tears off her face. Taking multiple deep breaths, her shaking dies down a bit. The small window of the room lets in the moon's light to bleed into the room. Illuminating the entire scene in front of me. The exposed and vulnerable Lukia in front of me had both a grace and beauty to it. Her tears made her look like a regular maiden, not the ranger or companion who saved me during that storm. She'd been holding back this side of her for a while, and it had finally eaten away at her.

Cupping her soft cheeks in my hands, the words flowed out of my mouth and into her heart.

"Because you are human. Pain makes us stronger. Our resolve to grow from pain is something that humanoids and just regular people face every day. Your mother is dead. But your companions, Gale, Herk, Yann, Ivian, even me, we have been there for you. Everyone back at Saiana village still owes you a great debt, the survivors of that goblin nest won't forget what you did. Everyone who has supported you continues to support you. If this painful feeling in your chest is loneliness, sadness, hatred, or any of the like. I can and will say it is something that will make you stronger when you accept it for what it is. Knowing that your mother is gone, again, doesn't change the fact that you were living after thinking she was gone."

She only listens. Nothing to say, she just listens.

"You asked me those questions and acted the way you did because you want someone to pity you. Well, sorry, I am not giving you any. That isn't the Lukia I know. The Lukia I know is a hothead who can shoot a creature from a mile away without question. She braves against the dangers in front of her. Facing the problem head-on, she doesn't give up on her companions nor abandon them. The person who you are is someone who is stronger than what you think. Behind all that mask of pain is a woman capable of even having my attention and admiration. She doesn't act womanly or like a maiden, she is a fighter, a survivor, someone who can kick ass at a moment's notice. She is graceful with a bow, one of the best I've ever seen. I can't catch up fast enough, fearing I may never outclass even her in archery. She doesn't need to beg for compliments for her appearance because she already is very beautiful-!"

My voice cuts off. I had said too much in my rant. I cursed myself for getting carried away, but what I said wasn't a lie. If I want her to know the truth. I might as well say it from my own heart, regardless of how much shame it brings me...

"Beauty doesn't cover it... I've watched her grow into a capable person other than that person... She also has a kind heart, someone who sees value in others, cares about others, and supports her friends with her gestures. She can cry when she needs to, and I wouldn't think to pity her. Because she isn't perfect, she is ideal as one of the few people I absolutely admire. I wouldn't want to be in a fight without her. That is the Lukia I know. The Lukia that should be in front of me right now. If she saw herself now, she would think it stupid and laugh it off, knowing that her problem had been solved long ago. I haven't given up on her; she will come back even if I need to drag her out myself!"

My face burned red in embarrassment, but I held onto her shoulders and said the last words while staring into her eyes.

"She is someone who I really like!" My lungs expanded my chest heavily. I was out of breath from speaking. My hands are still holding onto Lukia; I feel them shaking. Waiting for her response, her fingers' soft and smooth touch grace mine.

"You big dummy... Don't go all out like some dumb kid... My standards for someone like you aren't some shy boy..." Her lips gently pressed against my forehead. A riveting shock hit my entire body. Then I felt my body get heavy before I found myself lying in her arms. Her legs curled up and nearly encompassed my own.

I was speechless. My eyes focused on hers. Her lips formed a bright smile with tears in her eyes. Nothing in her expression screamed that desperate person I was talking to earlier...

"You're right...you know... About everything... I was just...stubborn...stupid...selfish... But I-...err... How should I say this... I felt liberated to hear what I needed from someone like you..."

"A-Are you going to be okay..? I didn't mean to say more than I had to..."

"Of course it is fine... It was really flattering... More so, I am shocked and embarrassed but I'm far too happy to care at this point... The pain in my chest has gone silent... I don't expect the feeling to be gone for good. However, I can grow from it until it no longer hurts. Like you said... It will make me stronger when I know that you will be there for me. Gale and everyone else, too, will be there. I can't be sad when I feel this relieved..."

"Well, I am glad...-ehhh?" Pulling me closer, my face rests into her chest. I begin to shift, but my body relaxes when her sweet scent graces my senses. It was a dizzy feeling, with my body tingling all over. I started to feel my body react, yet Lukia held me close. Her body held onto me in a warm embrace. I gently cuddled her back as my tired eyes struggled to stay open.

"You are far too small for me to take into a bed... What was I thinking haha... Thank you for stopping me... I don't think we would have such a moment like this together..."

"If I were Gale, you-"

"Please... Don't ruin this moment right now..."

"L-Lukia, you-"

"I'm conflicted, you idiot. My feelings are a mess, and I'd rather sleep comfortably... For once, I don't think my nightmares will show up after so long... Stay with me until the sun rises... Just let your body shut down...Doesn't sound bad at all..." Her breathing slowed, her muscles relaxed, and sleep had taken her.

"Lukia... I-... I wish I had known you at a different time. Maybe my feelings wouldn't be a mess too... I'll do my best for you too...Tia..."

The night she consumed us together. Our bodies were solid like stone, unmoving throughout the night. The heat from our bodies clashed and cycled throughout the entire night, keeping us connected. And finally, Lukia got the rest she needed for months...