Keyboard Immortal

“Waaa, how handsome!”

“Isn’t he the renowned Sixth Young Master of the Shi clan?”

“It’s no wonder why women like to give him food. Just look at his dashing appearance! Even I can’t help but want to dote on him!”

“Is that so? He doesn’t look as handsome as the rumors put him out to be. I mean, even young master Xie of our academy seems more than a match for him.”

“Hmph, don’t talk about that trash of a man. How can that bastard be put on the same pedestal as young master Shi?”

...

A group of passing female students began swooning over Shi Kun.

“Heh, women,” remarked Zu An scornfully.

There were quite a few people around Shi Kun at the moment. Most of the faces were unfamiliar to Zu An, but some of them were recognizable. He had no trouble picking out Yuan Wendong and Ye Chenliang.

Yuan Wendong had always carried himself as if he were the king of the world or some such. However, his usual arrogance was nowhere to be seen. He followed Shi Kun with an obsequious smile on his face, looking desperately for opportunities to fawn all over him.

Ye Chenliang was even worse. His attitude was the textbook definition of ‘bootlicking’.

The world is such a pragmatic place, huh?

Having seen plenty of this in his previous world, Zu An couldn’t help but sigh deeply.

Chu Huanzhao glanced over at Shi Kun before murmuring softly, “I thought that he would be really handsome, but he doesn’t look so different from my brother-in-law.”

Zu An’s face darkened. Is she trying to compliment me or insult me?

Shi Kun began walking toward them with a disarming smile, which—ironically—only made Chu Chuyan frown. Just as she opened her mouth to speak, he quickly interrupted, “It’s one thing for Chu First Miss to call me ‘another man’ on the street, but now that we’re in the academy, I should be considered as your classmate too, right? I shouldn’t just be ‘another man’ anymore.”

Shi Kun’s polite attitude left Chu Chuyan with no room to reject him. She nodded her head slightly and said, “Yes, I understand.”

Looking at the white-robed fairy before him, Shi Kun was mesmerized. Many beauties had actively offered themselves to him, some even coming from prominent backgrounds, but none of them could match Chu Chuyan. Her ravishing looks and her regal manner gave her an ethereal air, as if she were a goddess from heaven.

I must have her!

Shi Kun’s desire was growing stronger with each passing moment.

He put on an impeccable smile that tingled the hearts of all the female students around them and said, “Miss Chu, this is not actually our first meeting.”

“Oh?” Chu Chuyan was surprised. “Pardon my ignorance, but I don’t recall having met you anywhere.”

“Around seven years ago, during a gathering in the capital, I had the honor of catching a glimpse of you across a pond. Words couldn’t even begin to describe how enchanted I was. It was a pity that you had already left by the time I reached that spot. Ever since that day, my heart has been heavy with a lingering regret. I tried so hard to find the whereabouts of that beautiful fairy I saw over the years, but to no avail. It looks like heaven has finally taken pity on me, to bestow upon me the fate to encounter you once more.”

“Waaa! I never thought that young master Shi would be such a devoted man!”

“If those words had been meant for me, I would surely have fainted from bliss.”

“Yeah~ I thought that men with good looks were all philanderers, just like Xie Xiu! Who could have known that he would stay true to his feelings!”

...

Zu An felt burning flames of rage consuming his heart. These lovestruck bimbos! Why are they getting so excited over a couple of words? At this rate, even if he shits in front of you all, you’d still find a way to compliment him!

Throughout this entire duration, Shi Kun had been disregarding his presence to devote words of affection toward his wife. Surely no man in the world could tolerate this!

Zu An walked right in front of Chu Chuyan and said, “Brother Shit Kun, I believe that there’s something very wrong with what you’ve said.”

“Shit Kun?” Shi Kun’s face immediately darkened in fury. “Who are you calling Shit Kun? It’s Shi Kun!”

You have successfully trolled Shi Kun for 315 Rage points!

“All right, all right, Brother Shit Kun.” Zu An shrugged off Shi Kun’s words nonchalantly. “If I could summarize what I just heard from you: basically, after catching a glimpse of her a few years ago, you decided to hunt her down like a stalker. How could you then call this meeting the work of fate?”

“Who are you? Why should I answer your question?” Shi Kun sniffed coldly.

There was no way he wouldn’t know who Zu An was. However, given his standing, the best way to deal with Zu An was to simply disregard his presence.

“Ah, you don’t know who I am? I guess there’s a need for a formal introduction then.” Zu An reached out to grab Chu Chuyan’s hand. “I am the husband of the goddess you dream day and night of. You spend all your time fantasizing about her, but I’m spared the effort of having to rely on my imagination. The two of us share a bed, after all. Is that enough for an introduction?”

Chu Chuyan felt a jolt run through her body as her hand was suddenly grabbed. Her instinct was to pull her hand out from Zu An’s grasp, but she knew that doing so would embarrass him in front of the crowd.

Besides, her very purpose of marrying Zu An was to forestall both the royal family and King Qi from pursuing a political marriage with the Chu clan. If she let slip any indication that the relationship between two of them was a distant one, all of her efforts would have been in vain.

With these considerations in mind, she held herself back, and silently permitted him to hold her hand. Zu An had seemingly predicted this as well, which was why he had dared to do it in the first place.

What Chu Chuyan hadn’t expected was how venomous Zu An’s words could be. The crude terms he used made her ears heat up despite her cold personality. Is he taking advantage of me just because he knows that I wouldn’t go against him?

Understandably, the crowd erupted in a frenzy. They knew that Chu Chuyan and Zu An were wedded, but they had consoled themselves that she probably had other intentions in mind for marrying a good-for-nothing, and that she would never let him take advantage of her. In fact, it wasn’t a stretch to think that the two of them had not consummated their marriage on their wedding night at all.

However, Zu An’s declaration had shattered all of their fantasies. To make things worse, Chu First Miss did nothing to deny his claims, merely coloring in embarrassment. My gosh, I’m going insane!

Just thinking about how the number one beauty of Brightmoon City was pinned under a man like Zu An... Countless people immediately went bonkers with envy.

You have successfully trolled Gao Ren for 444 Rage points!

You have successfully trolled He Buyu for 444 Rage points!

You have successfully trolled Wu Zhenjian for 444 Rage points!

...

The massive influx of Rage points soothed Zu An’s heart, leaving him greatly heartened. Just like in the novels he had read in his previous life, it was easy to incur the ire of anyone, as long as a beauty was involved!

It looks like this is worth working hard for. I need to get more beautiful women... Ah, it’s not that I’m a pervert, but I simply want to earn more Rage points.

Shi Kun glanced at their tightly-clasped hands, and his cheeks began twitching. He had always viewed Chu Chuyan as his own personal possession, but she had now been touched by another man! Even though it was just her hand, it was more than enough to stoke his rage.

You have successfully trolled Shi Kun for 520 Rage points!

“Zu An, based on what I know, you and Chu First Miss sleep in separate rooms. She doesn’t even allow you to enter her room, let alone share the same bed. How laughable it is that I’m hearing such words from you.” Shi Kun sniffed in disdain.

Zu An, on the other hand, was appalled. How does he know that we’re sleeping in separate rooms? A sudden thought came to his mind, and he said, “I don’t recall mentioning my name at any point while introducing myself as Chuyan’s husband. How did you know that my name was Zu An then? Could it be that you have sent spies into our Chu clan? It just so happens that we uncovered a traitor by the name of Snow recently. Is it possible that you’re the mastermind behind her?”

Chu Chuyan immediately eyed Shi Kun suspiciously. If the Chu clan was unable to find the mastermind behind Snow despite the influence it possessed, the mastermind was likely to be of high standing. Shi Kun definitely fulfilled that criteria.

“Rubbish! Snow? Winter? What do I know about such things? Stop slandering me!” Shi Kun vehemently refuted his accusation. He hadn’t expected Zu An to be so sharp. “As for your name, it’s public knowledge that Chu First Miss is married. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that I know your name.”

Zu An scoffed in response. “Since you do know me, why did you feign ignorance earlier? It looks like beneath your pretty face lies a hypocritical heart.”

Shi Kun had no answer to that.

You have successfully trolled Shi Kun for 300 Rage points!

Zu An carried on, “Also, given your ‘lofty’ personality, shouldn’t you choose to simply brush off my accusations and ignore me? It’s such a surprise to see you desperately trying to refute the words of a nobody like me. Could that be a sign of a guilty conscience?”

Many of the spectators nodded in agreement. As hateful as Zu An was, there was logic in his words. This behavior was indeed at odds with young master Shi’s personality. Could he really be carrying a guilty conscience?

It was clear to Shi Kun now that Zu An had set a trap for him to leap into. He finally understood how Mei Chaofeng and Snow felt while dealing with this guy. He mentally cursed Snow. Why didn’t you kill this disgustingly reprehensible man earlier?!

He took a deep breath to calm himself down, and proceeded to ignore Zu An. “Chu First Miss, please don’t allow his words to affect the good ties between the Chu clan and Shi clan. I’m honestly unaware of the affairs that have transpired in your estate, and rest assure, they have nothing to do with the Shi clan.”

Chu Chuyan had already made up her mind regarding this, and she replied calmly, “I hope so. Our Chu clan might not be a prominent clan, but we would never allow anyone to take advantage of us.”

Shi Kun gave an awkward laugh. “Chu First Miss, you’re jesting with me. A ducal clan like yours is clearly a prominent clan. Besides, I’ve admired you for a long time now. I wouldn’t do anything that would harm you.”

Before Chu Chuyan could respond, Zu An cut in, “Ah, that reminds me. You mentioned that you met my wife a few years ago, and she has been lingering in your dreams since then. You didn’t expect to meet her in Brightmoon Academy, and you feel that it’s the work of fate, right?”

“Indeed.” Shi Kun gave him a cold stare. “Back then, Chu First Miss hadn’t married you yet, so what’s wrong with me admiring her? I’ve admired her for so many years that these feelings have become deeply rooted in my heart. I know that she’s married now, but I can’t control how I feel about you. Chu First Miss, I beg your pardon for that.”

Playing the sentimental man here, huh? Zu An sneered coldly. There were plenty of PUA lessons on the internet in his previous life. As a proud keyboard warrior, how could he be unaware of them?[1]

“Oh? That’s quite weird. I recall hearing that the Shi clan is a prominent clan in the capital, and it has many connections at its disposal. Chuyan isn’t some nobody either; she’s the First Miss of the Chu clan! Even if you had just asked the people who were in the area back then, there would surely have been some who knew of her identity. Yet, you claim that you couldn’t find her all this while, and even put on a ‘it’s fate that brought us together’ act. At this point, I honestly can’t tell whether you have malicious intentions in mind, or if you’re just plain incompetent.”

1. PUA is a common abbreviation for ‘pickup artist’.