Jörmungandr

Last time on Jörmungandr…

"I've gone by many titles; Elohim, Yahweh, Allah, Heavenly Father, the Alpha and the Omega. I am the God of Gods, my name is Jörmungandr, but on this day I shall be your judge, jury, and if need be, your executioner."

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 I glared at the circle of Olympians, Zeus was visibly sweating in his throne. His knuckles white from gripping onto the arms of his gaudy chair. Hera was sobbing and clutching Ares' severed head. Artemis and Apollo gaped at the cooling body of their half brother. 

"With respect… was that really necessary My Lord?" Hestia said with a sad look on her eyes. 

Hestia had probably been one of my favourite goddesses in mythology. She wasn't like her siblings. She didn't lie, cheat, or manipulate mortals for entertainment. I looked at the goddess of the hearth, her dress seemed to dance with flames. If she didn't look like she was a pre-teen, I could have even said she was fairly attractive. 

"Tell me he didn't deserve that and I'll give you a dozen reasons why he did." 

Hestia let out a resigned sigh and went back to tending the hearth. Zeus slumped in his throne before speaking in a defeated voice. 

"What do you want?"

"Addressing me like we're equals?" 

Zeus grit his teeth, "Why have you come here… My Lord?" 

"I don't know if you've noticed. Hell, I fucking doubt you've noticed anything that isn't something you're trying to fuck, but your God of Death was recently killed." 

"Thanatos has indeed been missing for the past few years. Hades has had to step up in his place." Athena said in a thoughtful voice. 

"Yeah, that cause I killed his ass." 

"You wh-"

"Not permanently mind you… but he did attack me while I was in the middle of speaking with my sister." 

"Why didn't you bring this information to us?" Zeus asked. 

I glared at the Olympian King, "I'm fucking sorry, did I hear you right? Cause it sounded like you were giving me a fucking order… were you giving me an order Zeus?"

Zeus gulped and shook his head, "N-no, Thanatos is a part of-

"Your pantheon, and as such was your responsibility. Yet he came into my territory and attacked me." I interrupted Zeus.

"Perhaps he made a mistake?" Poseidon tried to reason.

"Poseidon, I'm going to say this in the nicest way possible,  who the fuck asked you? Also, there's a child out there that looks an awful lot like you, did you know that?" 

Poseidon froze and looked at Zeus who was now glaring at him. 

"YOU BROKE THE OATH?!" Zeus roared at Poseidon who angrily stood from his throne. 

"YOU BROKE IT FIRST!" 

Their childish tantrum gave me enough time to gather myself. With the rage that had come out of left field slowly petering out I felt an odd sense of calm wash over me. Turning I saw Ophis lower her hand and give me a nod. 

Feeling a bit bipolar I returned my sword to my hammer space and took out my wand. 

Poseidon and Zeus were still yelling at each other, a storm began to rage outside mirroring the two gods' emotions. Their argument seemed to be about Zeus' divine weapon and some dumb oath. Seeing that they weren't going to stop, I flicked my wand twice stunning the both of them. They flopped onto the floor bonelessly and I fought the urge to giggle when Zeus landed face first in Poseidon's crotch. 

I tucked my wand away into my sleeve and glanced at the remaining Olympians. Part of me still blistered with rage and demanded that I kill a few of them to send a message. I internally frown at the thought. I had been having these sudden bursts and urges to lash out at people. At first I assumed it was because of my previous incarnation's personality. Now that I thought about it, his behaviour was also strange, historically speaking that is.

He went from creating worlds and all sorts of life to obsessing over his own power. He created humanity and condemned his own angelic son for tricking them. He gave them free will but then exploded with rage when they exercised their free will. He drowned an entire planet leaving scant few survivors. All of that didn't sound like a loving merciful god. It sounded like someone drunk off of their own power. 

I cleared my thoughts and made a note to figure out why I was being more and more like my previous incarnation. I looked at the Olympians who were still staring at me in caution and fear. 

"Someone explain to me why Olympus and the Greek territories are a mess… well, why they're more of a mess than they usually are." 

I could tell a few of them wanted to protest, but Athena seemed to agree. She spoke up from her throne when I looked to her for an answer. 

"The bastar- I mean Poseidon, and my father have been arguing for weeks now. My father's Master Bolt was stolen recently and he believes that his brother is responsible." 

I raised an eyebrow at the open hostility Athena had for Poseidon.

"And one of you sent a Minotaur after a mother and child because…"

They remained silent, looking between each other as if looking for someone to blame. 

"Don't deny it either, I could feel the divinity on that Minotaur. One of you told it to go after that mother." 

"My Lord," Hestia spoke up, "none of us here would do such a thing. Many of my family have children in the mortal world." 

"So you fucks do still have demigods." Hestia flinched when I growled. 

"You act as if you've never had one." Aphrodite scoffed. 

Her fellow Olympians glared at her probably thinking I'd strike her down and a part of me did want to blast her off of her throne. I held my anger back before replying. 

"I had one. One demigod child in my entire life. How many have you idiots had? How many have you doomed to die with your idiotic plots and schemes against each other?" 

"My Lo-

"Stop, I'm not done Hestia." 

She nodded and stepped back toward the hearth. I felt bad for snapping at the goddess but things needed to be said. 

"Like I said when I first arrived, you lot have been allowed to do whatever you want for far too long. The other pantheons don't create as much chaos as you at their worst." 

"It's no fault of their own." 

I turned to Ophis who had suddenly spoke up after remaining quiet for some time. She walked up next to me slowly and snapped her fingers. An unknown teen appeared in front of her with a startled yelp. 

"Ophis what is this?" 

"A traitor in their ranks." Ophis simply stated. 

I reached out a hand and made the teen stand up straight. When his face was revealed Hermes jumped from his throne with a worried cry. 

"Luke?!" 

"Hmm, so it seems you know this boy." 

"I- yes My Lord, that's my son. Luke Castellan." 

"And…" 

"He-

Luke interrupted his divine father, "I hate them. I hate all of them. They toy with our lives as if were nothing but pwns for their games. They call themselves our parents and yet when we need them the most they turn a blind eye. They take pleasure in killing us to spite each other. I will have my revenge for all the pain they caused me and my siblings, even if I have to burn the world to the ground." 

The teen glared at the Olympians, teeth clenched in anger. 

Ophis mentally nudged me and I turned to her. She pointed at the teen and I realized that he was still alive despite being in my unrestrained divine aura. I suppressed my aura once more. With my suffocating aura gone, I could clearly see a parasitic darkness that was latched onto the teen. It then clicked that the darkness was divine in nature. It was the only way for Luke to have survived my full aura. 

"So that's what it is." I muttered, drawing the attention of the Olympians. 

"What is it My Lord?" Athena asked. 

"A Titan, powerful one at that, has been manipulating things."

"What?" Several Olympians said at the same time. 

My gaze drifted to Hestia who looked worried and a bit fearful. I drew my wand again and woke up Zeus and Poseidon.

The two elder Olympians jumped apart and prepared to start throwing magic at each other. 

"Before you two fight, I want to point out that I've potentially figured out what's been going on." 

"What?" Zeus glared at me.

"He," I pointed at Luke, "Has been enchanted by one of your Titans into sowing conflict in your pantheon." 

"How do you know this?" Athena asked. 

"Because I see its foul aura in the boy." 

"Erm, I can hear you, you know. You don't have to talk as if I'm not here." Luke grumbled, his anger seemingly forgotten. 

Gabriel patted him in the head with a smile on her face. I felt the build up of power from Zeus and blocked the lighting bolt he threw at Luke before it could hit the teen. 

My rage shot back up since Gabriel had been in the path of the bolt. Summoning my own bolt, I hit Zeus with a low powered arc of holy lightning. It wasn't enough to kill him, but he still flew back and crashed into his throne. 

"Now, where was I… oh yeah. One of your Titans has been interfering with your pantheon. Ares' body is thick with its influence and so is Luke." I ignored the concerned looks half the Olympians gave the groaning Zeus. 

"You're saying that Ares was also being manipulated?" Poseidon asked, ignoring his brother.

"Yes, and before any of you ask, No. No I don't feel bad for killing him. Ares was scum, and he made a comment about my sister  and my daughter that I didn't like."

Poseidon threw up his hands in surrender. "I wasn't going to say anything." 

"Who is this Titan that's been manipulating us?" Athena question.

"Dunno, you'll have to ask Luke here." 

The demigod son of Hermes gulped at all the eyes that shifted over to him. While the Olympians questioned him I turned to Ophis and asked her a few questions of my own. 

"Do you see who's manipulating them?" 

She nods, "He's weak, his aura is faint and in multiple places." 

"How does that work?" 

She shrugged, "I do not know, but I can destroy him for you." 

"Yeah, go ahead and do that. I want to finish up here soon." 

She nods again and disappears without another word. I turned back to the Olympians who were still asking Luke questions. 

Artemis spotted me looking around and stared at me with thinly concealed hate. Smirking at the goddess I sent her a wink making her face twitch in annoyance. 

"I don't know who he is, I- I just hear his voice." Luke lied.

I sighed and shook my head, this questioning session was going to take forever. I went back to trying to annoy Artemis, anything to entertain myself until they were done talking in circles. 

[Scene Break]

Eventually the Olympians came to the conclusion that Kronos was influencing some of their minds to do out of character things. Not that they all agreed with the idea. Zeus was firmly in denial that Kronos was even alive. He had it in his head that he killed the Titan permanently. 

That is, until Ophis came back with the Titans sarcophagus. She told me that she had taken a trip down to their version of hell and that the Primordials of the Greek Pantheon were also stirring. 

"What more evidence do you need brother, our father is rising. We can not continue fighting among ourselves." Poseidon pleaded with Zeus. 

Zeus scoffed, "This subject is closed. We shall no speak of it again." 

Then he tried to teleport out only to crash into the ceiling and fall back down to the floor. He jumped back up on his feet and I cleared my throat getting his attention. 

"I haven't dismissed you, where the fuck do you think you're going?" 

Zeus grumbled and sat back down in his throne. 

"So let me get this straight. Kronos, manipulated Luke's disillusionment to your pantheon so that he would steal your divine dildo, then you decided that it was Poseidon's fault and that his demigod son, who didn't even know about your hidden world up until today was the one that stole it… so I have that right so far?" 

"Your point?" Zeus grumbled.

"Are you actually retarded? Instead of asking, you go off your own ego and assume that you're right because you're king. How the fuck have you stayed in power for so long." 

"I WILL NOT STAND BY AND BE INSUL-"

"YOU WILL SIT DOWN AND SHUT THE  FUCK UP, YOU OVERGROWN MANCHILD." 

The throne room rumbled from the force of my shouting. I let out a breath to calm myself and glared at Zeus. 

"One of your gods attacked me unprovoked, I should kill all of you for that. Fortunately for you I'm feeling like being merciful. Fix your shit, and I swear if I have to come back to fix it for you. I'm taking your divinity and giving it to a fucking frog." 

I didn't give them time to argue, pulling Ophis and Gabriel close to me I teleported out and back to the forest where I first arrived. 

"Are you alright?" Ophis asked. 

Gabriel gave me a worried look, "Daddy you were scary back there." 

I sighed tiredly, "Something is bugging me. You two keep an eye out here. I need to check something." 

I teleported out again before the two women could stop me. I appeared back in Chamber of Secrets, immediately I let out a burst of power and incinerated a snake statue in rage. Breathing hard I sat down on the stone floor and closed my eyes just as Freya slithered over and coiled around me protectively. 

Mindscape

My library of memories was a mess. Books lay scattered and shelves were destroyed. Slowly I began repairing everything, going through the memories as I did. 

I rewatched the birth of my previous incarnation, Ophis and Great Red came next. I continued further into my mindscape and found a door I had never seen before. I tried to open it but it wouldn't budge. Applying more force the door eventually gave way and I fell into darkness. 

I tried willing light into existence but none came. The darkness started becoming suffocating and I nearly panicked as I felt powerless for the first time in a long time. I couldn't even escape my own mindscape. 

Pain momentarily flared in my head as a new set of memories were uncovered. Memories that my previous incarnation had done his best to forget. Memories of other gods and goddess. Gods and goddess that he killed so that he could take their power for himself. 

He had watched dispassionately as the Mesopotamian god Enki lay bleeding out at his feet. The god had begged for his life but it fell on deaf ears. As he plunged his sword into the dying gods heart, Enki told him something that made him recoil in shock. 

"A thousand curses in you, may the power you have stolen today corrupt you like a plague. You shall never find peace for your existence shall bring forth conflict and death."

He had scoffed and beheaded the god, why would he believe a being far below him. Their power was his now and that's all that mattered. Unknown to him a goddess had escaped his massacre. Ereshkigal, the goddess of death, had hidden herself away beneath the bodies of her friends and family. 

He hadn't noticed anything wrong for years. His power grew but so too did the curse. His sons and daughters were the first to point it out but he waved them off. They were mere angels, he was the god of gods. 

When he slaughtered his own creations with a flood he finally broke and realized that he had fallen to the curse he had dismissed as the ramblings of a dying god. In a fit of shame he hid himself away. For years he looked for a solution. Then Samael attacked, the Grigori joined bitter that they had fallen from grace. 

In a fit of desperation he severed his soul. Locking away the darkness and chaos within Trihexa. Sealing the apocalyptic beast and a dark fragment of his soul behind countless seals. Then he altered the memories of those who he thought knew of his secrets. The feat weakened him and though he was greatly weakened he confronted the devils. Standing strong he fought and beat them back. 

Only he had underestimated just how weak he had gotten. He was fatally wounded in the last battle, a thousand devils and their kings lay broken around him. His life fading fast he called for his Seraph. They obeyed him without question. Locking away his fading divinity in the True Longinus. 

This was to be his failsafe against the true death. The fading of a god. With his soul fractured from when he sealed away his darkness, he wouldn't reform, he would fade. So he sealed the other half of his soul into a Sacred Gear in the hopes that he would live on through the Gear. 

As time passed the seals around Trihexa frayed allowing small bits of his soul to escape. The fragments of his dark soul found its way back to each user of the True Longinus eventually driving them mad. 

As more of the darkness he locked away rejoined his soul he began to try and lock them away so that they didn't affect the hosts of the Longinus. Only he wasn't as strong as he once was, especially not as a mere soul locked away into a weapon. His seals were no longer perfect, bits of the darkness seeped out like a corruption infecting the True Longinus.

His fears and doubts fading with the years until he had all but forgotten about the darkness he had tried so hard to seal away. Hope flaring as he found his newest host, me, that hope turning into shock as I absorbed his divinity and taking his power as my own. 

[Scene Break]

I opened my eyes when the memories finally stopped. Freya was still coiled around me and a quick charm told me that only a few minutes had passed. I sighed and slowly got up. 

"Why is it that my life always ends up being complicated?" 

§Finally realized?§ Freya hissed. 

"Was I the only one that didn't realize how cringe I was being?" 

Freya nodded her head and I groaned in embarrassment. I wanted to facepalm my palm through my face. Sure I was cocky, and sure I had minor anger issues. But I should have realized that I was being a muppet when I decided to be an edge lord for no fucking reason other than to flex my power. I really wanted to say that the Greeks were at fault for attacking me but really, I had been the one that was resurrecting people left and right drawing their attention in the first place. 

"Why didn't anyone tell me?" I asked Freya. 

§Are you really going to ask?§

"Fair point. Ophis sexually assaults people with snakes. Gabriel is a total Daddy's Girl, and so are the other angels for that matter, but the Founders as well as Natasha should have said something." 

§Perhaps they never got the chance?§

"I mean they have been busy with training and cleaning up after me. Fuck… I've been a dick. I need to make it up somehow." 

Thoughts swirling I cursed at my own stupidity at not realizing sooner that I wasn't my normal self. I had already been in the same position when my previous incarnation took control of my body when I first ascended. I should have seen the signs, especially since I was fully conscious this time and not a passenger in my own body. 

§Freya, sister… the next time I start acting like an edgelord in front of you please bite me.§

§I shall strive to do so brother.§ Freya replied before slithering back to her lair. 

I teleported back to Ophis and Gabriel, the two looked at me with visible concern. 

"When were you two going to tell me that I was being cringe?" 

"Never." "What's cringe?" Ophis and Gabriel replied at the same time.

"…"

"I thought you were trying something new." Ophis added, before finishing with; "I kind of liked it."

Gabriel nodded along, "You reminded me of that time when you flooded the earth. I thought it was normal." 

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. "The next time I do something similar to that I want you to punch me in the face… as hard as you can." 

Ophis nodded but Gabriel looked affronted that I'd suggest that she hit me. I put a hand on her shoulder to comfort her. 

"What I did recently wasn't normal for me. Sure it was funny at the time and definitely well deserved on the Olympians side, but I'm trying not to be a vengeful asshole. So the next time I go 'fire and brimstone upon ye', I want either one of you or the both of you to snap me out of it." 

"Okay." Ophis reiterated her agreement. 

"Fine…" Gabriel finally conceded. 

"Now, where's that mother and child I asked you to look after?" 

"…"

Gabriel nervously giggled and twiddled her fingers, I raised an eyebrow at their behavior. 

"Ophis, Gabriel, what the hell happened?" 

"We-" Gabriel started only to freeze when Ophis Glared at her, "I got distracted by the campers and made Ophis come listen to their campfire sing-a-long." 

"While we weren't looking something snatched the mother away and the child ran off to look for her." 

"Fuck…" I cursed. 

"Sorry daddy." Gabriel looked down sadly. 

"No, it's fine Gabriel… you couldn't have known. They should have been safe here within these borders. There's a protective barrier around this place that should keep monsters out." 

"It was Hades." Ophis added. 

"I know, I figured he was the only one that didn't know I was here since he wasn't in the throne room when I went ballistic on the rest of the Olympians." 

"So what now?" Gabriel asked.

"Well, I'd say we split up and you and Ophis go recover the mother." 

"But?" Ophis stared at me. 

"But I'm afraid of what you'll do to the guy." I stared back. 

Gabriel looked between the two of us, "Daddy, I can go get Miss Sally back." 

"If you're sure." 

"I am, she was my responsibility and I let her get captured." 

"Alright Gabriel, remember to call for help if you're in any trouble." 

She smiled happily and hugged me tightly, "Okay daddy, I'll be safe." 

She jumped into the air and flew away with a strong flap of her wings. Ophis jumped onto my back in her usual spot. 

"Guess we should start by asking if anyone has seen Percy here." 

[Scene Break]

Long story short, other than Hestia, who had been by the bonfire visiting, no one had seen Percy. Hestia also unfortunately only saw Percy run off out of the camp's borders. Finding the kid would have been impossible… only I'm God and I have main character energy no matter where I was. 

That, and Percy gave off a very distinct aura, so it wasn't too difficult for Ophis and I to track the young demigod. 

Thankfully, for the Olympians continued existence, Ophis and I found Percy walking by the dirt road dragging along a bronze sword that was too big for him. 

We landed next to the demigod startling him. Percy lifted the sword with some effort and brandished it towards us before he recognized me. 

"What are you doing out here kid?"

"They took my mom." He lowered the sword. 

I had sent Gabriel to go get her back. She should have returned by now so I'm guessing she got caught up with something.

"Wanna come with me to get your mum back?" 

"Hey wait! You can't just do that! You need to get a quest from the oracle!" A feminine voice called out from some bushes. 

I raised an eyebrow to mask my surprise as a blonde with curly hair jumped out of a bush while stuffing a hat into her jacket pocket. I hadn't even sensed her, glancing at Ophis, the Dragon God shook her head too, also not having noticed the girl. 

"You! You followed me?"

The girl rolled her eyes at Percy. "Duh,"  she looked at him as if he was stupid, "you were sneaking out. After Luke went missing I had to make sure you weren't doing anything suspicious." 

"Suspicious? How, I just got to your stupid camp." Percy bit back. 

I coughed to get their attention, the girl blushed in embarrassment. 

"I think you should introduce yourself first before accusing Percy of being suspicious." 

Percy looked at me thankfully, it seemed that even he didn't know the girls name.

"I- uh, right. My name is Annabeth Chase, daughter of Athena." 

"I'm Percy." The green eyed demigod replied. 

"I knew that already." Annabeth muttered. 

Percy smiled sheepishly, "So… what now?" 

"Well, we could go back to where we go get your mom back from Hades." I suggested. 

"Hades!? B-but hes one of the gods, we can't fight him." Annabeth exclaimed. 

"Er- Anniebeth?" 

"It's Annabeth, and what?" 

"He's," Percy pointed at me, "God." 

"Oh! Wait what? Which one are you? Are you a minor god? What are your domains?" Annabeth asked excitedly. 

"You always ask this many questions to all the gods you meet?" I smirked as I beat back the urge to smite the teenaged girl for mistaking me for a minor god. 

'I really need to sort this ego thing as soon as I'm done here.'

Annabeth blushed again, "Sorry." 

Percy snickered, making her glare at him. "He's THE God Beth." 

"Don't call me that, and what do you mea-" 

"As entertaining as all this, we still have to save your mom Percy." 

"Are you really taking me with you?"

"Yeah of course, she's your mom. Besides, it's not like we're going to take public transportation there. That would be ridiculous." 

"B-but, um… sir?" Annabeth called out. 

"What is it?" 

"What if the gods get mad that we took a shortcut?" 

"Annabeth, the gods are already in hot water as is. They wouldn't be able to afford the losses if they lashed out at me." 

"I- but, ugh- fine." She crossed her arms and huffed in annoyance. 

"Come on, let's go. Hades isn't going to kick his own ass."

"Yeah! Let's go get my mom back!" Percy cheered. 

"What are you even doing with that sword, it's nearly as big as you." I asked the dark haired demigod. 

"Er- I was going to use it on Hades?" 

"Do you know how to use a sword?" 

"I was going to throw it at him." Percy admitted, Annabeth rolled her eyes behind his back. 

"I'll give you a few lessons when we get back." I promised. 

"Guys wait up!" Another voice called from a different set of bushes. 

"Oh for fu-" I started to curse only to be interrupted by both Percy and Annabeth at the same time. 

"Grover?"

"Goat boy…" I drawled while looking at the Satyr impassively. 

Grover gulped, "Uh, Percy, who's the scary looking guy?" 

"Grover this is g-

"You can call me Joe, now can we please get going before someone else decides to come out of a shrub?"

Percy nodded, Annabeth looked like she wanted to start spouting off questions again while Grover looked at me nervously. I teleported us before we could get sidetracked any further. 

[Scene Break]

All things considered, Hades' corner of the Underworld was a bit more colorful than I had expected. Though I knew that Persephone was probably the reason for all the color. 

Percy and Annabeth looked around with unmasked awe at the new sights. Grover was chewing on an aluminum can that he got from somewhere.  The direction provided by the signs was entertaining and I didn't really know how to react to reading a sign that said 'EZ Death' that was supposedly a line for a train. 

"This looks really depressing." Percy mused. 

"Obviously…" Annabeth agreed, "it's the Fields of Asphodel." 

"The field of what?" 

"Asphodel, it's where people who haven't done anything note worth go." Annabeth answered. 

"So it is depressing then?" Percy reiterated. 

"I mean I guess." Annabeth shrugged. 

"All I see is a bunch of souls wandering around doing nothing. Seems pretty boring to me. At least in Heaven you can do whatever you want." 

"Heaven?" Annabeth asked. 

"Yeah, my seat of power." 

"WHAT?!" She exclaimed, drawing the attention of a few different Underworld denizens. 

"Jeez, for the daughter of a goddess of wisdom you're pretty slow huh?" Percy teased her. 

"There are other gods?" Grover asked between bites out of his can. 

I explained to them who I was as we kept walking towards the manse in the distance. Annabeth paid rapt attention, occasionally asking questions about Heaven and the three factions. 

"So you're the only god in your pantheon?" 

"Yeah… and while it affords me greater power than any other gods it also causes some problems." 

"Wait how does it give you more power than other gods?" Percy asked. 

"Because, all the worship I'm assuming." Annabeth answered Percy. 

"In a way, like the Greeks I've adapted to modern times and stopped relying on human worship for power. I still get power from prayers and the peoples beliefs but I don't need it to be as strong as I am." 

Annabeth nodded in understanding while Percy looked contemplative. Grover was now munching on a new can that he picked up off the ground. 

"Do you have plans on having more gods?"

I looked at Percy, "As much as I don't want to, I'll have to. All this power is changing me." 

"Power corrupts." Annabeth chimed in. 

"As much as I loath to admit it, yeah. Power does corrupt. I'd rather share this power rather than have it drive me crazy." 

"Guys were here." Grover finally stopped chewing on cans. 

"Full already?" I teased the Satyr. 

"I- I'm a nervous eater." 

"I can tell." I chuckled. 

"Come on, my mom is in there." Percy shouted as he rushed forward. 

Annabeth grabbed at him as two skeletons with M16s noticed Percy. Before they could raise their weapons I blasted them with holy lightning. 

"There goes the element of surprise." Groaned Annabeth. 

"Relax, you guys are with me. I'll handle it." I pointed out. 

The blonde demigoddess nodded and pulled a protesting Percy back. Grover gulped as more skeletons ran out of the mansion. Ophis woke up from her nap and looked at the skeletons. With a wave of her hand, the skeletons were promptly dismantled by a swarm of snakes. 

"T-that's really disturbing." Annabeth muttered as she watched a skeleton get violated by a snake. 

Percy and Grover couldn't help but agree. Ophis simply shrugged and dismissed her snakes with another wave of her hand. 

"Daddy?!" A familiar voice called out from the wheat fields. 

"Gabriel?" 

"Here! I'm here, I got lost on the way." 

I floated her over to the small group from where she was in the middle of the field. 

"Gabriel, did you forget that you could fly?" Ophis asked her. 

"I- uh, someone looked like they needed help." 

"A soul?" Annabeth looked curiously at the Seraph. 

"Oh no, she wasn't a soul. She was still alive." 

"But isn't that field supposed to be the afterlife?" Percy jumped in. 

"Supposed to be. You'd be surprised at how many people accidentally wander into the Underworld." 

The demigods and Grover looked at me with baffled looks. 

"What? There's entrances to the Underworld all over the place. I fell into one once while using the restroom." 

"What how?" 

"Let's just say it was a traumatic experience and leave it at that yeah?" 

I eventually managed to corral everyone and get them to start walking again. Only for the now slightly larger group to be stopped again. We were now only a few hundred feet from the mansion. 

The fury looked down at us with an evil sneer. Percy gasped and pointed at the fury. 

"Mrs. Dodds?" 

"Halfblood!" The fury hissed and the two other furies circled around the group. 

"Percy, do you know these women?" I asked the dark haired demigod. 

"Er- that one is, or was my Algebra teacher. She tried to kill me." 

"Interesting…" I glared at the fury while directing some of my aura at her. 

The fury's eyes widened, "YOU! What are you doing here?!" She screeched at me. 

"Simple, I'm here to pick up this young man's mother." I said as I gestured towards Percy who waved at the fury. 

The three hissed in Ancient Greek and flew in a close circle together. They discussed something before one of them flew down to speak with us. 

"You may proceed to Lord Hades." The fury said reluctantly. 

I hummed and turned to my companions, "Let's go then," I turned to look back to the fury, "you and your sisters better pray that Hades hasn't done anything to this boys mother or so help me… I will turn the three of you into assless chaps." 

The furies hissed and flew off back to wherever they came from. Whether they took my warning seriously or not was yet to be seen. 

[Scene Break]

To say that Hades was tense when we stepped into his throne room would have been an understatement. The god was gripping the arms of his seat with a white knuckle grip. Persephone was by his side looking impassive. 

"Hades." I drawled. 

"Why have you come here? Last the pantheons heard you were dead." 

"Well, I was dead… then I wasn't. Surely that isn't too hard to believe?"

"Your death may have been kept secret in your factions God of the Bible, but we Greeks know the truth. You perished fighting your own child."  

"What can I say," I smirked, "I got better." 

I could tell that Hades was getting annoyed that I wasn't telling him how I came back from the dead. Even then, it wasn't his place to know about the life and death of anyone. People often forget that Hades is the god of the underworld. Not the god of death, that title belonged to Thanatos. 

"Why are you here?" Hades repeated his first question with a bit more annoyance in his voice. 

"You took something that doesn't belong to you, obviously I'm here to take her back." 

Persephone who had remained quite up until that point, glared at her husband. 

"Hades, who did you take?" 

Hades froze in his throne, a look of panic crossed his face before he schooled his features. 

"I- I do not answer to you." He scoffed. 

"I see," I summoned my sword, "well it seems we're at an impasse. I'm not leaving until you give Percy here his mother back." 

"Or what?" Sneered the god of the Underworld. 

"Ophis, Gabriel please put up a barrier around this room. No one leaves and no one gets in." 

The two women nodded and disappeared to do their jobs. Hades seemed to remember that I hadn't come alone. His eyes darted to where Ophis had disappeared from then to the three teenagers that were with me.

"Percy, Annabeth, Goat Boy, stay behind me." I said in an even voice. 

The three didn't hesitate and immediately jumped behind me. Persephone glared at her husband and got up from her throne at his side. 

"What are you doing?" He asked her. 

"Stepping out of the way." She hissed.

"I- what? My love?" 

"You brought him here. You know who he is and just how powerful he is. Do you seriously think he won't hesitate to kill you?" 

"He's a fraud! No one can come back from the dead. Not even us gods." 

I grinned, using the line I had grown fond of I replied, "I'm just built different." 

I ignited my sword and pointed it at the now nervous looking Hades. Persephone bunched up her dress and shuffled further away from him. 

"So what will it be? Return Sally, or die." 

"You'd kill me over a mortal woman?!" 

"Uh… yes? I literally sided with humanity over my own son. What makes you think I won't do the same when faced with a similar choice?" 

Hades growled in frustration, "Someone has stolen my helm, I will not return her until it is returned to me." 

Percy shifted behind me, I glanced back at the demigod and gave him a comforting smile before turning back to Hades. With one hand I put up a strong protective barrier around the three campers and with the other I stabbed my sword into the ground. 

As soon as the blade sunk into the ground I let out a burst of my full aura blasting Hades back into his throne and making Persephone stumble as she hid behind a pillar. 

"You are in no position to negotiate you absolute twat, fuck your goofy ass helmet, you have until I count to five to return the boys mother." 

"I-

"One." 

"You can not honestly expe-

"Two." 

"I am a God! You can not bully me arou-

"Three." I drew my sword from where I stabbed it into. 

"Persephone! Love, do something!"

"Four." 

"ALRIGHT! FINE!" 

I pulled back my divine aura just as there was a flash of golden light, when it faded away Sally was standing in front of me looking confused. Percy peeked out from behind me and spotted her. 

"Mom!" He cried out in relief before rushing over to her.

I vanished my sword and glared at Hades, "You Greeks are really lucky that I'm trying so damn hard to not be so vengeful in my old age. Had I been a younger God I'd have slaughtered all of you for attacking me." 

"Um… daddy? Didn't you kill that one guy?" 

"Hm? Oh yeah, Ares. He said some rather distasteful things about you and Ophis so I killed him… permanently." 

"You killed Ares?" Hades gaped.

"Well yeah, someone had to die to get the message across." 

"What message?" Hades frowned. 

"That I was back and that attacks on me or anyone else under my protection would cause the attacker some serious health issues." 

"Health issues?! You killed a god!" 

"And? It's not like you idiots are the only gods that exist." 

"What?" 

"Did you seriously believe that you were the only ones?"

"N-no of course not!"

"Then why did you react as if you did?" 

"No god has ever been killed permanently." 

"Uh, you're forgetting that I was dead for a bit." 

"So you admit that you were dead!" Hades exclaimed. 

"I never denied it." 

"Then-

"I was dead, now I'm not. Get over it," I turned to Percy and Sally, "You guys ready to leave?" 

"Don't ignore me! What about my Helm?!" Hades shouted. 

I rolled my eyes and snapped my fingers, a gaudy black helmet popped into existence above Hades' head, I may or may not have adjusted the weight of the helm to a thousand times its normal weight before it fell and hit him on the head. He let out a pained grunt as it slammed into his head knocking him to the floor. Persephone snorted and started giggling at the groaning god. 

"There, now how about some burgers. I'm craving some Kurger Bing." 

"Don't you mean Burger King?" Annabeth asked after recovering from her shock at everything that had happened.

"I meant what I said." I shrugged before teleporting everyone back onto the human world.

[Scene Break]

Gabriel and the kids watched in dumbfounded silence as Ophis and I continued to eat an obscene amount of food. Burgers for me and miniature apple pies for Ophis. 

The workers at the Burger King had also stopped what they were doing and watched us in various states of shock at the literal pile of food we practically inhaled. As divine beings Ophis and I didn't need to eat, in my case I enjoyed the flavours I had grown up with as a human. For Ophis… I wasn't sure why she had such a sweet tooth. 

Supposedly she didn't need sustenance either and only needed pure energy to keep herself alive. Something that both she and every being with divine blood produced internally. 

I scarfed down my last burger and let out a satisfied burp. Grover nodded appreciatively at the burp while Percy snickered. Annabeth looked at us with a disapproving gaze. 

"You really don't act like a god." 

"What? And be all boring with a stick shoved up my ass?" 

"I- well… yeah! Gods are supposed to be perfect." 

I rolled my eyes, "Look at the Olympians Anniebeth." 

"That's not my- ugh… whatever. Can we go back to camp now?" 

I chuckled at the pout she shot me, "so how about it Sally?" 

I had asked the woman if she would like to become one of my angels so that she didn't have to deal with being away from Percy or Gabe.

"A chance to get away from Gabe and be with my son? I wanted some time to think about it but now I can see that it's not a difficult choice to make." 

"Mom?" Percy looked at her. 

"I agree, I'll be one of your angels." 

I smiled widely at her, "Good, we'll finalize everything after I drop these kids back off to camp."

[Scene Break]

Percy decided to stay in the camp for the rest of his summer. I could see that he was slowly coming out of his shell and interacting with people his age. 

I flashed over to Olympus after dropping the campers off and threw Zeus' Lightning Bolt at him before giving all the Olympians one last warning about fixing their shit. Sally was with me and gave Poseidon an apologetic glance that he returned. 

With business in the Greek territories wrapping up I prepared to teleport everyone back to Heaven. Percy was crying a bit while saying goodbye to his mother. Sally consoled her son and promised to come pick him up after summer camp was over. 

After they said their farewells I teleported everyone back to Heaven and greeted Michael who was waiting by my throne. Gabriel gave me a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek before flying off to return to her duties. Ophis wandered away to find snacks. Sally stood next to me nervously as I spoke with Michael and the rest of the Seraph. 

"The Greeks will spread the message of my return shortly. There's no way they won't. I even appeared in their corner of the Underworld so the Grigori and the devils should know about my revival first." 

"What about the Church father?" Raphael asked

"We leave them in the dark for now. We need to crush all the corruption first before we let them know that I have returned." 

"You caused quite the commotion in the Greek pantheon father, what if they retaliate." 

I shook my head, "I doubt it. The Greeks, despite their claims, are not the strongest pantheon. Even if they retaliate, I can simply crush them myself." 

"Very well father." Michael nodded before turning to Sally.

"Right, many of you must be wondering who this woman is. She is Sally Jackson, the mother to a Greek demigod. She will be joining our ranks soon, have Rowena and Helga show her around." 

Sally glanced at me, "What're you going to do?" 

"I have some questions I need to look into. Speaking off," I turned to Michael, "I need you to lactate [read: Locate, but it's funny so I'll leave the typo as is.] someone for me." 

"Who?" Michael looked curious as to who I'd have him find. 

"Ereshkigal, she's…"

Michael frowned, "I know who she is father, what do you want me to find her?" 

"She may have some answers to these questions I have." 

Michael bowed his head, "Then I will find her." 

"Good, you're all dismissed," I looked at Sally with a smile, "and Sally, welcome to Heaven." 

[Scene Break]

Azazel, the Governor General of the Grigori, read the report on his desk with a bored expression on his face. Sighing loudly he signed the document and set it aside to a growing pile of papers on his desk. 

'Maybe I should take a break… I've earned it after all.' He mused. 

It was then that a wave of power washed over the entirety of the Underworld. A power he was intimately familiar with. After all, who could forget the aura and power of the God who created him and his siblings. 

With wide eyes Azazel jumped to his feet, "Father?" 

His door slammed open and Baraqiel and Penemue rushed into his office with matching looks on their faces. 

"Did you feel that?" Baraqiel asked with clear worry in his tone. 

"It feels almost like-" Penemue started only for Azazel to cut her off. 

"Our Heavenly Father, yes I know." 

The trio remained silent for a moment before Baraqiel broke the quiet. 

"Do you think that he has returned?" 

"No, but I am not sure. Michael has not said anything nor has Heaven become more active and if I know our brother, he would be the first to brag about our fathers return." Penemue spoke out. 

Azazel nodded in agreement, "Nothing out of the ordinary can be observed from Heaven, but I wouldn't put it past him to ask them to conceal his return. Hewas always dramatic like that." 

"So you think he's returned?" 

Azazel turned to Baraqiel, "Like I said, I'm not sure but this aura is unique, so unless someone found a way to imitate our Heavenly Father, this is him." 

"This is troubling." Penemue sighed. 

"This could affect the peace talks." Baraqiel added. 

"That it could, send word to Sirzechs. The devils must have felt that burst of power too. I will go investigate." 

Baraqiel and Penemue nodded and disappeared, Azazel looked out of his window to the landscape of the Underworld outside. 

"I guess it's time to move forward." 

In a separate section of the Underworld Sirzechs, the strongest Satan, gasped as raw power washed over him. He had felt that power before and he had never thought he would ever feel it again. An old wound throbbed in pain and he grit his teeth. Grayfia rushed to his side with a worried look. 

"I'm fine Grafia, nothing to worry about." He said with a disarming smile. 

She looked at him dispassionately, "Nothing to worry about? Even I felt that powerful blast of holy aura. I might not have faced him during the Great War but there's no denying his presence." 

"No, it's impossible, I saw him fall in battle with the original Satans." Sirzechs waved her off. 

She hid her displeasure and nodded, "As you say." 

Grayfia was the 'Strongest Queen' but she was still just a maid. Even if she was the wife of Sirzechs Lucifer, she was nothing but a humble servant to him. Sighing internally she wished that he would just listen for once. She had a feeling that this wouldn't be the end of things. 

In a concealed location in the Underworld, Kokabiel frowned as he felt the divine aura he had thought he would never feel again. He witnessed his father being mortally wounded in battle, there was no way he could have survived his wounds. 

Yet despite his doubts he knew the type of man his father was. Unpredictable, always several steps ahead of everyone, and disgustingly powerful. 

His plans would need to change, all doubts aside. If he had truly returned then simply killing the sisters of two of the 'Great Satans' wouldn't be enough to start a new war. 

"Raynare… change of plans, gather the others." 

Kokabiel looked at the trembling Angel bowing before him. He sneered at her weakness after feeling that pulse of holy power. Raynare shakily got to her feet and with another small bow left him alone with his thoughts.

"One way or another, I will have my war whether or not you've returned… Father." He said to no one.

————————————————————

Omake: 'Smelly Gabe's and the Terrible Things That Happened to Him'

One Gabe Ugliano was not having a good day… first the police had finally gotten back to him about his car, or what was left of it. Apparently they had found it off the side of the road ripped to shreds. What more, was that apparently a large animal took a massive dump inside the gas tank. 

Not only that, but somehow everyone thought that his appliance store was having some sort of sale. Even his employees were convinced that they were having a 99% off summer sale. 

As if things couldn't get any worse, his wife had left him. All he got was the divorce papers in the mail along with a picture of Sally in another man's arms. Said man was clearly some sort of male model. Gabe seethed at the picture and burned it along with the divorce papers. He picked up his phone to make a call to his associates to see if they could locate the bitch and her new man. 

"Percy was right… you do fucking smell." 

Gabe whirled around to face the intruder. His eyes widened when he spotted the man from the picture Sally had sent him. 

"You fucking prick! I'll kill you!!!" Gabe shouted as he rushed the man, hellbent on choking him out. 

"Ah… nope. I'm not your opponent in this. She is." The man said before raising a hand and freezing him in place. 

Fear bubbles up in Gabe's gut along with the three cheese dip he had eaten for dinner. Something was wrong here, he couldn't move.

The man had done something… he swore he would murder the smug motherfucker as soon as he got out of whatever held him in place. 

The man stepped to the side revealing a little girl in a black dress. Gabe leered at the girl and thought about the things he could do to her once he got out. The disgusting slob had all but forgotten the situation he was in.

"Disgusting…" The girl said in a monotone voice.

Gabe couldn't even speak, as much as he wanted to shout and scream. Like the rest of his body, his mouth refused to move. Gabe's eyes widened in fear as the shadows beneath the girl began to churn. Snakes emerged from the darkness of her shadows and he gulped. The snakes drew closer, Gabe tried to look away but it was no use. He was still frozen in place.

The man watched in morbid fascination as the hissing snakes slithered up Gabe's legs. The sound of flesh being torn echoed in the dirty apartment. The hissing became muffled as the snakes slithered into the man's cavities. Wincing slightly the man turned to his companion. 

"I will never get used to seeing you do that to people." He voiced his thoughts out loud. 

"Ice cream now?" 

Jörmungandr, aka the Biblical God sighed, "Yes Ophis, ice cream now." 

The two primordial entities vanished in a bright flash of light. Leaving behind a scene many would describe as the most grotesque modern art piece ever seen.