I’ve Reincarnated into an Elf

Chapter 19

“Calm down, Mom. It’s not like I enjoy getting hurt,” Eldmir said.

“That’s why I’m telling you to be more careful!

You seriously tried to fight eight War Hammers by yourself? You should’ve run away!”

“Eight War Hammers?!”

The beastfolk sisters shouted in disbelief. It seemed like they hadn’t known about it until now.

“Heh heh, now do you understand how impressive I am?”

Eldmir tried to act smug, but it didn’t work.

Ersin panicked.

“Oh my gosh, are you crazy?! You fought eight War Hammers?!”

“Yeah, yeah, this kid’s reckless. He fought them all alone, too.”

“Alone? Eldmir, how are you even alive?!”

Are they treating me like a ghost now? Eldmir thought. This was exactly what he expected.

Damn.

“Hey, hey, stop freaking out. The important thing is that I’m alive, and they’re all dead. I won. Got it?”

“Unbelievable.”

Eldmir emphasized that he won and took them all down.

Of course, half of them were taken down by other Sentinels, but considering he’d nearly finished off most of them, it wasn’t exactly a lie.

The beastfolk sisters fell silent, staring at Eldmir like they were seeing a ghost. Eldmir turned his gaze to Essiria.

“Why are you bringing up unnecessary things in front of the kids?”

“Well, if you don’t want situations like this, you should handle things better next time.”

A silent exchange of glances passed between mother and son, and Eldmir sighed.

They say a child can never beat their parent, but that wasn’t true in this case.

“Got it? I’m really something. So you guys don’t have to worry. Just stay here and wait quietly. I’m going to have a quick talk with this guy.”

Eldmir gave a subtle nod to Irian, who had been watching from behind.

Irian nodded back, opened the door, and stepped outside.

Before Eldmir could follow, Keris stopped him.

“Hey, Eldmir.”

“Yeah?”

Keris hesitated for a moment before speaking.

“Actually, we heard it. The things you shouted outside.”

“Uh… really?”

He felt embarrassed. Had they really heard all that commotion? He thought back to the pointless things he’d said.

Keris, flushing, mumbled, “Thank you.”

“Huh?”

“Thank you. Honestly, we didn’t mean anything to you… we were just passing enemies, right?”

She lowered her head, mumbling in a tiny voice. Eldmir chuckled quietly.

Just then, he noticed Esiria giving him a signal as she stepped out the door.

At his mother’s unspoken request to calm the girls down, Eldmir nodded silently.

“Why the sudden wind?”

“Ugh… You’re impossible! I’m trying to thank you, and you—!”

Keris lifted her head, shouting, her face turning as red as a tomato.

“It’s you who’s weird! Just like that elf said, we were your enemies! For all we know, there are beastfolk out there still fighting your people! Not everyone’s going to treat us like… like guests!”

“Well, I don’t think what I did was as hard as you think. It was something I could do, so I like to believe that anyone could’ve done it too,”

Eldmir said, stepping away from the door and slowly walking toward her. He placed his hand over her head and ruffled her hair a bit roughly.

“Ugh.”

Keris’s ears perked up at his touch, and she tensed, feeling the movement pass through his hand and fingers. It was unexpectedly soft.

“I just think that if what I do can mean something big to someone, then that’s what matters. To me, something as simple as ‘doing it’ could be a ‘help’ to you guys.”

“…How can you be like that?”

“What do you mean?”

“You… you said that. Just like that elf’s parents, someone you care about could go through something similar with us. Aren’t you scared of that?”

Her large eyes were filled with anxiety, and she trembled like a child afraid of being scolded.

“Heh…”

He laughed softly, trying to figure out how to respond. He thought about how to comfort this small, thoughtful, and anxious girl who was carrying so much weight on her shoulders.

“You don’t have to carry the burden of your whole tribe, Keris.”

“…!”

Eldmir lowered his body to meet her gaze. She flinched for a moment at how close he was, but soon met his eyes quietly.

He could see it clearly in her eyes. The weight she was carrying, the pressure she was putting on herself almost to the point of self-blame, fighting with herself.

She looked like he did in the past, constantly struggling.

“The reason you’re a princess is not because you’re strong, or because you’re a War Beast. It’s just because of that. If it weren’t for that, look at what happened to the others. Despite all that, you still feel this responsibility.”

Her own people had betrayed her once. Following their instincts, they turned on the weak to prove they were the strongest.

And yet, she still thought like a princess and acted like one. She was still the princess of a fallen tribe, tightly binding herself with her own isolation.

Above all, she didn’t need to feel guilty. Her own kind had already shown their claws, and she was just as much a victim.

But she kept taking on the guilt as though their mistakes were hers.

“Kid, whatever you decide to do, whether you get god’s power back, restore your tribe, or whatever else, it’s not for me to say. But this, I know better than anyone.”

“…”

“Don’t let responsibility eat you alive. Their mistakes are theirs, not yours. What you need is not to waste your emotions on them, but to focus on yourself moving forward.”

“…”

“Think about what’s really important to you. Find what you truly value. Understand where your happiness comes from. Whether that’s your sisters or even some dream you haven’t realized yet. If your dream really is to restore your tribe, then sure… you can feel a little responsibility for that.”

He shrugged and straightened up, gently tapping her shoulder.

“You stubborn, good kid, you’re allowed to be a little selfish. Just like I help you guys for my own reasons, you should put ‘you’ in your principles too.”

“…”

He glanced around at the other sisters, Esrin, Ketrit and smiled softly at each of them.

“Are you not scared? Well, of course, I’m scared. Right now, somewhere out there, your people might be hurting my tribe.”

He could feel Keris flinch at his words.

He gave her shoulders a light tap and took his hand away.

“But so what? You’re different from them. You wouldn’t do that, right? That’s enough. No need to worry.”

They were different. He helped them because he believed in it. He saw them as friends. They were separate from those others.

“Does that answer your question? I hope it does.”

With that, he ruffled her hair one last time before leaving the room.

Left behind, Keris touched her head where his hand had been, staring at the spot where he’d disappeared. Her face had turned bright red as she hugged her head.

Irian and my mother were already seated, talking. I had asked them to wait while I spoke first, but it seemed it took a bit longer than I expected.

When I sat next to my mother, Irian greeted me with a nod.

“How far did you get in the story?”

“Hmm, we were explaining how we ended up meeting Keris and why we’re treating those kids as guests.”

“Ah, so from there, huh?”

She hadn’t even listened to any of the story while I was unconscious for those two days. I clicked my tongue inwardly and sat down next to my mother as Irian looked at me.

“Eldmir, I won’t drag on with the petty talk about needing to harm the Beastfolk or how they’re from the same tribe as my parents’ killers. As you said, that’s just my personal grudge, and to you, they might just be guests you need to guide.”

His declaration of leaving behind old grudges made me think that maybe things could start going in the right direction. With a bit of hope, Irian spoke again.

“That’s why I want to hear your thoughts again. Just like how I approach them with my personal grudge, other elves likely feel the same way. Even if they don’t share my grudge, the relationship with them exists, after all. Eldmir, why have you accepted them as guests?”

Irian’s face was serious as he looked at me, as if he needed to hear this answer. It was a question worth having, after all.

It wasn’t by chance that the three protectors of El Lien were hostile toward Keris and didn’t understand me. Their behavior wasn’t due to their rough nature, it was simply because it was the way things were in the world.

“Your concerns are valid. To other elves, I probably look like a madman leading enemies into the forest,” I said, nodding in agreement with her words.

“There shouldn’t be enemies among my guests. If I make a mistake, it could lead to a crisis threatening our village, our people, and even the World Tree.”

I gave a low laugh after saying that. It was half a bitter chuckle, half self-mockery.

“But my thoughts are different from yours. Overall, yes, the Beastmen are our enemies. There’s no denying that. But just because those kids are Beastmen, it doesn’t mean they’re our enemies. That’s not the case.”

I stared directly into Irian’s eyes as I spoke.

“Thanks to the protectors, the peace of the forest is being maintained. I’m not unaware of their efforts. Considering how the brothers have devoted centuries to the forest, I’m not blind to how much I owe them. But tell me, why have we only been protecting all this time?”

At my sudden shift in topic, Irian furrowed his brow.

“Only protecting? What do you mean by that?”

“We’ve only been either protecting or occasionally invading for revenge. Isn’t that a bit too barbaric for elves, who are supposed to be symbols of harmony?”

“What… we’ve proven our pride through history. In the past, we’ve attempted to interact with other races many times to spread teachings, showed mercy to those who invaded the forest, and spread the benefits of the forest to those outside. Are you saying you’re belittling our way?”

Irian raised his voice in excitement, but after a breath, he continued in a calmer tone.

“That statement is an insult to our entire race. It suggests that you’ve forgotten who you are.”

Irian spoke firmly, but his words didn’t carry anger, he was simply logically arguing against my thoughts. It was likely a response borne from his own doubts about his beliefs.

However, I shook my head.

“You’ve misunderstood the point I’m making. I may not have even undergone the coming-of-age ceremony yet, but I’m still an elf who grew up with the teachings of the forest. I know full well the mercy we show to those who are enemies of the forest. But…”

Should I say it?

A small doubt stirred within me. This was a thought I’d held for 20 years, a conflict and doubt I’d been carrying with me since I was born and raised in the elven village. A dangerous thought that might seem absurd if others heard it.

For the first time, I started to express a thought I had kept to myself all this time.

“What I mean is… we are elves. We are a race that values harmony, not Beastmen or goblins or anything else.”

Finally, the frustration and doubt I had carried inside me began to spill out.

“So when did our race become so closed off? When did we change into this?”