I've been waiting for you forever

"Do you like music?"

At Eliza's question, Arthur's face lit up with pure joy and he nodded vigorously. "I love music. I like to sing, sometimes. But I'm tone deaf."

"My mother says I have a beautiful voice, but I don't believe her. She had cancer, about a year ago; she's fine now, but it was hard for a while. When she was sick from chemotherapy, I sang to her. She said it helped ease the pain."

"Do you want to sing me something?" Eliza was taken aback by the question, and for a moment she considered refusing, but then she met Arthur's hopeful gaze. His sad but sweet eyes seemed to ask her, take away my pain, and Eliza found herself weak in the face of that look.

She wanted to see Arthur smile, she wanted to give even a single moment of happiness to this man with the tired and emaciated face, who seemed to hide an unbearable pain in his heart.

So Eliza cleared her throat and began to sing one of her favorite songs:

I feel like I'm going crazy

Is love all in my head?

Or in a bleeding wound?

I feel like I just know

That everything I've done

Brought me to you and me

That I still run away

Because I'm weak at heart

"I think your mother's right, you have a beautiful voice."

Eliza giggled and shook her head, suddenly shy. "Stop it, you don't, you're just being nice."

"No, seriously, you have a great voice. What's the name of the song?"

"I'm holding on to you. When I think of love, this song comes to mind. It's kind of like the singer wrote it for me. I think my first reaction to love would be to run away. I have a hard time trusting people. More than that, it terrifies me."

"Why?" Then, as an afterthought, Arthur added, "You don't have to answer if you don't want to, sorry."

"No, it's okay. I'm just afraid of someone breaking my heart, I think. Haven't you ever loved someone who broke your heart?"

A shadow darkened Arthur's face, but his tone seemed distant, almost indifferent, as he answered, "Yes. Yes, I did."

"Me too, a long time ago. But I like to think I still have my heart intact, and I'm trying to protect it tooth and nail. I'm sorry I'm telling you all this, maybe you don't want to hear it and want to stay on your own."

Eliza started to get up from the table, but a hand grabbed her wrist firmly, holding her in a firm but not painful grip. "No! No, please, stay. I know I'm not much company…"

"No, it's not your fault. It's just… I don't know, I thought I'd bored you by this point." Eliza glanced at her watch. "We've been talking for over an hour."

Arthur looked surprised. "Oh… I hadn't noticed. It seems so natural, talking to you."

"Yes… yes, it's easy for me too. It's never been easy for me, talking to anyone. But you're different."

"In a bad way?" Arthur's voice was small and scared, and Eliza hated the fear in his voice and eyes and wanted to erase it as soon as possible, so she smiled at him and quickly answered,

"No, no. In fact, the opposite. It's like you're the only person in the world who understands me."

"I've never really liked talking to people before," Arthur echoed, mirroring her own feelings. "People have always been mean to me. My whole life. You were the first one who didn't get angry or scared when you heard me laugh."

"And you're the first one who didn't think my disorder was weird or ridiculous." They shared a knowing smile. "Believe me, I'd like to stay here with you all night if I could. But my parents are waiting for me, I should probably call a cab. We can walk together, there's no point in you walking home in this rain. If you give me your address…"

"I can't." Arthur was shaking again and looking everywhere but at Eliza's face. "I can't, because I don't have a home to go to. I have nowhere to go."

He was homeless, then. Eliza wasn't that surprised. He wasn't wearing a coat or shoes, his clothes were worn out, and he said he had no money on him. Even though they'd been talking for a long time, they were practically strangers, and yet Eliza felt sorry for him. The place would probably close soon, and the rain wasn't letting up. The night was going to be cold and rainy; there was no way Eliza was going to leave Arthur sleeping on the street, abandoned to himself.

"Oh… okay. Okay, I can find you a place to stay for the night."

"No, that's not necessary, really. You've already been so kind, you offered me chocolate…"

"I wanted to. I want to help you, Arthur, but you have to let me."

"Why would you help me? You don't even know me, you don't know anything about me."

"That's not true. I know your name is Arthur Fleck, I know you have the kindest eyes I've ever seen, and I know you're freezing. You're shivering, Arthur, and you're soaking wet. If you come with me, you won't have to spend the night in the rain." Arthur still looked uncertain, wary.

Eliza remembered his words. People have always been mean to me. My whole life.

"I don't mean to hurt you. Please, trust me."

After what seemed like an eternity, Arthur nodded. "Okay. Okay, I'll come with you."

"Okay, then I'll call a cab right now."

Eliza wasted no time in dialing her cell phone. Ten minutes later, the cab was in front of the diner. She and Arthur got in and sat next to each other in the back seat.

Arthur looked nervous; he reached out to touch Eliza's hand, then stopped and put her back on his lap, remembering that she didn't like being touched.

He wanted to touch her even for a moment; just a moment, to make sure that that beautiful, caring girl was real and not a trick of his love-hungry mind.