It Seems Like My Childhood Friend Has Returned

#09

After the rehabilitation treatment ended, the day of my discharge was nearing, and suddenly I found that the only visitors I had were three people: Mom, Dad, and Joonu.

Of course, a few had come after the first visit, but I couldn’t stand it any longer and asked them not to come back, so that was that. They never returned.

Joonu, with the upcoming college entrance exam, must have been quite busy, yet he came to the hospital every day. He’d suggest studying together, say he brought something delicious to share, and tell me stories about what happened that day…

He kept coming up with reasons so obvious even a fool would know, just to visit me.

Feeling guilty while receiving Joonu’s warm kindness, I couldn’t refuse that warmth. If Joonu hadn’t kept coming, I would have… fallen apart.

One day while preparing for discharge, Joonu showed me a list he had written in his notebook, detailing places to go and things to eat after I got out, passionately explaining why we had to stick to his list. The sight was so ridiculous that I couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

Before I knew it, the thought of leaving the hospital transformed from a frightening future where I’d show my changed self to the world, into an exciting future where I could have fun with Joonu.

#10

The long-awaited discharge day had arrived.

In what felt like a short time, yet seemed to drag on forever inside the hospital, I was packing my things with my parents and waiting for Joonu to arrive.

I had told Joonu he didn’t have to come since it would be tough for him, but he insisted it would be ridiculous to miss such a milestone and got angry with me instead.

Remembering that sweet yet foolish sight made me smile without realizing it.

However, when an hour passed after the scheduled time and Joonu still hadn’t arrived, I wondered if something had happened. I tried calling, but there was no answer at all. Just as I began to ponder what was wrong, Dad answered a call and his face turned pale.

“…What? Joonu…?”

Why was there a call about Joonu coming to Dad?

Suppressing the creeping fear blooming in my heart, I looked at Dad, and he said, “Seo-ah… Joonu is currently in a coma….”

I might still be trapped in the hell of that day.

#11

I heard the reason Joonu collapsed.

Even after hearing it, I couldn’t believe it.

The fact that Joonu was hospitalized after getting into a fight.

Joonu was good at sports and had a big build, but he was the kind of person who would never bully anyone. If there was someone being picked on, he would step in to help.

He wasn’t the type to mess around, but if you poked him, he’d snap back. That was Joonu.

And yet, he fought against eight people alone.
Because of me.

I hurried to the hospital where Joonu was admitted and asked the attending physician. It turns out that Joonu had gone to confront a group of bullies who had been making crude remarks about me, and he ended up fighting them ferociously. In that process, although the others were also badly hurt, Joonu fell into a coma.

I wanted to die.

I simply cried and cried endlessly.

All I wanted was to be happy with Joonu.

Was I asking for too much?

Was it such a big desire?

Thinking about how terrified Joonu must have been when he fought against eight people, or how painful it must have been for him to get so badly injured that he ended up in a coma, I couldn’t possibly imagine it. The fact that all this happened because of me was hard to accept.

As I was crying to the point where I could barely breathe, I suddenly realized something.

When I thought I knew everything about Joonu, I didn’t understand why Joonu got hurt.

He was hurt by my words, and even though he knew his feelings wouldn’t be reciprocated, he put his emotions on hold just to protect me.

Every time there was a moment of change for Joonu, it was always because of me.

I could never truly understand him.

Joonu was always ready to change for me, always had been.

When it came to me, Joonu was always on edge, maturing faster than I did—just to protect me.

I took him for granted, thinking it was just his nature.

He loved me and had always kept me safe, yet I only realized it so late.

I wondered just how much he was hurt by my words back then, how much pain and worry were hidden behind that ever-smiling face he always showed me.

I had the same feelings, but out of fear of losing him or becoming less than others, I suppressed my emotions and clung to a shallow lie that I knew him completely as I quickly accepted my feelings.

We could have built so many more memories and had great times together.

“I love you, Joonu.”

I quietly let out a confession that my late realization could no longer be heard.

#12

♪♬♪♬♪♬

How long had I cried until I collapsed? I opened my eyes to the sound of my phone ringing beside me.

As soon as I opened my eyes, instead of an unfamiliar hospital ceiling, a familiar ceiling came into view.

This sight was definitely the ceiling of the house that had caught fire.

In a daze, I blinked, trying to comprehend, when I shifted my gaze to the phone that had been ringing annoyingly, and seeing the name on the screen made my heart race as if it would explode.

[The Joonu Guy]

“Joonu must be… definitely in a coma…?”

I couldn’t grasp the situation, but wanting to hear Joonu’s voice, I cautiously picked up the phone.

“Hey, Han Seo-ah… You asked me to wake you up, so why are you taking so long to answer? Wake up already….”

His voice sounded a little hoarse, as if he had just woken up, but it was the sweetest voice I longed to hear.

Hearing Joonu’s voice burst open my emotions like a faucet.

“Joonu, hooowangt, are you, huh, okay…?!”

#13

“…? Why are you crying?”

I was baffled.

This was strange.

My childhood friend, who insisted on an early morning call because he said he had to get up early, immediately started crying when I asked if he was okay after waking up groggily from a dream.

“Joonu… Is this not a dream…?”

“It’s no dream. Did you have a nightmare? What’s wrong?”

Did I dream that I died?

It was funny how my friend, who always teased me about dying, was now crying and calling my name in a whiny voice after waking from a dream where I seemed to be in trouble.

This is cute? What the heck.

Looks like I still wasn’t fully awake, that Joonu boy.

“Hey, Han Seo-ah. Stop crying and pull yourself together. I’m fine, no matter what.”

“…Really?”

As I slowly calmed down, I showed a weak side of myself.

That level of devastation from early morning was quite overwhelming.

“Yeah. This big brother is super duper fine, so stop crying. You have to get ready because you’re going to be late for school. Let’s meet up soon.”

“Okay. Let’s go together. I’ll get ready and contact you.”

“…? Alright. I’ll get ready and message you too.”

After a tearful morning call, I lay in bed and pondered.

What was up with her? Is she on her period? It’s too early for that.

I couldn’t figure out why she suddenly acted like that.

If it were the usual Han Seo-ah, she would have said, “Oh, Joonu! You starred in my dream! So annoying!” while playfully poking fun at me, not crying and worrying over me like this.

“Agh, geez… hearing her cry in the morning like this….”

Now I couldn’t help but worry about her.

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