Is It Permissible To Abandon a Childhood Friend Who Has Become a School Idol and Be Happy

18

If I were to speak only of the results of what happened after that, I suppose I failed.

I entered the quiz show in a fluffy, somewhat frivolous mood, and before I knew it, I had made it to the finals, but I don’t remember much about the details.

For some reason, I felt like people were glaring at me, but I didn’t really care about that.

My attention was more on the camera pointed at me, or rather, on the future Kou-kun who would be watching on the other side.

My face felt like it was on fire at the thought of him seeing the ‘me’ I am now, and I was desperate to keep my emotions from showing, so I didn’t have the luxury to look around.

That’s why I was rather relieved when I lost in the end.

I wouldn’t have known what to say if I had been interviewed like that.

However, the person who beat me was also speaking in a small voice with her head bowed towards the microphone, so maybe there wasn’t much of a difference.

I think her name was Akane Akane.

She answered every question faster than me, and I’m sure she’s smarter than me.

I remember vaguely thinking that she said she was a junior high school student from Tokyo during the introductions, and that maybe people in the city go to cram schools and are smarter.

But she was a bit of a quiet girl.

I remember her because she was my opponent in the final, but also because her clothes and aura reminded me of myself.

Perhaps I subconsciously felt some kind of sympathy for her.

I thought it was a bit strange that I felt that way, even though we had only been in the same room for a short time and hadn’t even spoken.

Anyway, it’s all over now.

I’ll probably never see her again, and I’ll have nothing to do with her.

I feel a little disappointed, but I also think it’s for the best.

As I thought about all this while absentmindedly looking out the window, time flew by and I was back in my hometown.

But that’s where the worst of it began. In a way, I was filled with a gloomier mood than when I had decided to go on the quiz show.

After finishing the recording in Tokyo, I was greeted by the cold Tohoku sky and a family celebration hosted by my aunt.

I asked her to stop because I was embarrassed since I didn’t win, but she wouldn’t listen, and we ended up renting out a whole hall in a hotel and having it anyway.

As I was the guest of honor, I had no choice but to attend, and I ended up trudging to the venue like a cow being led to slaughter.

In all the commotion, I had completely forgotten about the quiz show and couldn’t even remember her face anymore.

“Ugh, I’m so exhausted…”

I let out a big sigh as I got out of my mom’s car and headed inside the house.

I had reluctantly agreed to go, and as expected, it wasn’t any fun at all.

They kept asking me all sorts of questions about my current appearance, and my aunt even praised me for the photos she had secretly taken of me, which made me feel embarrassed and uncomfortable.

Finally, they started asking me about Kou-kun, and by the time I was finally able to go home, it was already very late at night.

“I wonder if Kou-kun has already gone to bed…”

The light in his room was off, so he probably had.

Honestly, I kind of wanted to talk to him a little bit.

But it would have just turned into me complaining, so maybe it was for the best.

I convinced myself of this as I started to change.

I brushed my hair, took out my contacts, and took off my clothes.

By the time I finished changing into my pajamas, I had completely reverted back to my old self.

I put on my glasses, and voila! There wasn’t a trace of “her” left.

The usual, plain “Misaka Mio” was standing there.

“Phew…”

I definitely feel more comfortable like this.

That “other me” always made me feel uneasy.

Even though it was me, I didn’t feel like it was.

When I was like that, it felt like there was another, completely different person inside of me.

(I probably won’t have to be like that for a while, so that’s good.)

The only time I would have to transform would be if Kou-kun asked me to.

I’m planning on keeping it a secret until the day of the event, but I’m secretly looking forward to seeing how he reacts when he sees “her.”

(But I’m also a little embarrassed… I’d be mortified if he thought that was the real me.)

I’d get so tired if I had to be like that all the time.

Well, that won’t happen. At school, I’m just a plain, ordinary middle schooler.

I’m just a normal girl who will graduate without anyone, except for Kou-kun, ever noticing me.

“Good night, Kou-kun.”

I whispered a greeting that he would never hear, turned off the light, and slipped into bed.

I’m exhausted today, so I’m going to sleep. But if I could…

“I wish I could have a good dream…”

Slowly, I drifted off to sleep.