Is It Over Now?

Chapter 4: Chapter four



When Remus wakes the next morning, it's to the hushed whispers of boys that seemed to have forgotten just how well the supposedly still sleeping teen could hear. 

" He's different now; cold ," came the low voice of Peter as the other three boys moved as quietly around the room as they seemed capable.

" Moony has always been a little distant," came James's Layla defense of the supposed to be slumbering teen - the sad thing was that Remus couldn't even deny it. James and Sirius always hung all over one another, wrestling when all four of the boys had been young, and Peter was always eager to be as close to the spotlight as he could be. Remus had always been the most reserved of the lot of them, a boy that hid behind more secrets then he would ever know how to count. This was just the first time that anyone had ever said so much out loud. " He's still our Moony though."

"It's my fault, isn't it?"

The voice was unsure and pained, almost unrecognizably so, but Remus still knew who had spoken even if he couldn't see them. The hidden teen waited for the inevitable way that James would jump to the other's defense - to protect his brother in everything but blood from the reality of it all as he had done when they were young. 

It never came.

Silence hung in the air for a long moment, broken only by a muttered curse as Peter seemed to have dropped something - likely the boy's shoe - on himself.

Using the noise as a probable cover, the werewolf slipped out of bed, gripping the banner subtly as he stood, his bones protesting anything but a death - like sleep.

"Morning," the tallest of the four boys muttered, his voice thick with sleep as he ignored the so clearly guilty looks on the faces of his friends in favor of gathering his clothes to go and change in the bathroom. 

When he came back out the other three were waiting patiently by the door for their fourth to grab his books and wand so that they could all walk down to breakfast. The rumbling in the wolf's stomach made the teen eager to comply, but stopped short at the peculiar looks from the other three Marauders. 

" What ?" Remus asked, his voice a little more than twinged with annoyance.

"Is that a new wand, Moony?" James asked, an almost tangible confusion lacing the other teen's voice.

Remus looked down as the pale wood in his hands, his skin buzzing from the magic within it reaching out to his own in a way that the previous one never had. From how right it felt to hold it at last. A smile curved on the lips of the teen, sharp like a predator's teeth.

"Yeah," he answered simply, slipping it inside of his robes as the others watched, seemingly no less confused than before.

"Did your old one break?" Wormtail asked almost meekly, a shiver running down the rat's spine at the glint in the taller boy's eyes. If Peter wasn't already friends with the teen, he might had attempted to become so right then so that such a look would never seek to eat him whole.

"Nah, just wasn't mine now was it?" Remus answered, his words inspiring more confusion than clarity in them once more, but the tallest teen started for the door before the others could ask anything else.

—-

Classes passed slowly though the rest of the day as long speeches warning of the dangers of false sense of complacency went into one ear and out of the other with each subject as OWLs were behind them all, but NEWTs only a year ahead.

Remus would never deny though the small thrill that went through him each time that he used his wand, the way that the magic seemed to ebb and flow in a way that it never had before. A stark contrast from the way that the old wand had always taken time to warm up to him at the start of each new term, yearning for an owner that was long gone now. The boy couldn't help but wonder if this ease was how all of the others felt each time that magic poured from their skin - somehow he thought that it wasn't quite the same for him as it was for the others.

The end of the school day couldn't come soon enough though as Remus separated himself from Mary and Marlene after Care of Magical Creatures with a lie spilling too easily from the boy's lips.

Too trustingly believed as well.

The library was quiet when the teen entered, a stillness laying thickly over it that only came from a strong bout of disuse such as the summer holidays. Madam Pince glared healthily as the boy as the Gryffindor walked past her and a NEWTs student or two, forcefully ignoring the compulsion to flip the witch off. It wouldn't have done him any good to do so, but that didn't mean that the thought hadn't crossed the teen's mind almost every time that he'd seen the ancient witch.

A smile crept across the lion's lips, instantly dispelling his previous mood as Remus saw an achingly familiar stream of blond hair among the old shelves and a mop of black pouring over a book or three at one of the tables not far from the other.

"Took you long enough," Regulus muttered as he turned the page of his book, but there was no bite in the younger boy's words, only the barest hint of relief. As if he had feared that Remus wouldn't have come at all.

"Care," the older boy said as he sat down across from the snake, their feet knocking loosely into one another's under the table from each of their long legs. Remus couldn't wait for the day that the elder Black brother realized that Regulus had outgrown him, though he supposed that it might never come as the pair were hardly ever in the same room as one another outside of meal times. Rarer still to be so close to one another to notice such things.

Regulus only hummed in understanding, but Remus didn't mind. He liked that so many things could be said through so few - words spilling from silent glances and gestures that almost no one else could read.

It felt a bit like a magic all of its own.

Parchment and books were scattered across the table hazardously, the papers filled with Pandora's familiar messy scrawl. Sometimes Remus found himself wondering how he could have ever found Ravenclaws to be of one of the neater houses when this was a product of only one of them - let alone a whole house .

A new book joined the pile, its pages already opened to the needed one by its handler.

"Evening Dora," Remus greeted to the fiercely imaginative girl. The blonde only waved half heartedly at the oldest of the two boys as she quickly scribbled another thing down before discarding the newest book as obsolete.

" Remus ," the girl said with more than a hint of surprise as she lifted her head once more, ink covering her pale finger and somehow smudged onto one of her cheeks. It wasn't an uncommon sight in the days that the Ravenclaw girl became invested in projects heavily.

"Evening Dora," the Gryffindor boy said once more, no heat or animosity in the eldest's voice as he spoke.

"How long had he been here?" The blond asked the younger Black brother, not bothering to whisper as they all knew what the question would be.

"A good minute," Regulus answered in a voice that sounded utterly devoid of anything at all, but the other two could see the slightest gleam in the boy's gray eyes.

Pandora at least had the decency to look relieved that it was such a short time this time, before waving the matter off entirely. "Doesn't matter. I think that I found some spells that we could combine with…"

And just like that, the odd trio spent the next two hours or so working through spells and books, studying Ancient Runes and potential potions to try that could be modified to suit their needs. History books became their friends as the trio studied past delvings into such a subject as theirs as other students came and went.

By the time that the three came to a stop, the world outside of the caste windows was already beginning to grow dark and winter had surely already started not so long ago. The three packed up and did away with the mess that they had made in the time that they were there, talking quietly about nothing at all as they did so. It wasn't until they had gone back to the table to get her their things that the three spoke of anything of importance.

Remus watched as the younger pair looked at one another proddingly, as if they each wanted to say the same thing, but neither wanted to have to be the one to do so. In the end, it was Dora who lost the silent tug of war and Remus bit back something of a genuine laugh as the Ravenclaw's shoulders slumped into a pout.

"What is it?" The Gryffindor asked, his stomach grumbling iratably for the not so patiently waiting food just down a few halls.

Dora sighed as if some heavy burden had been placed upon her. "At the end of every year, Ravenclaw house has an exhibition of sorts to show off the things that we've created this year - a highlight to our obsessions I suppose you could say." And Remus almost smirked at the last part that so perfectly mimicked the charms Professor's voice that one would think that he had been standing just behind the Ravenclaw girl. "Students from other houses are typically invited to watch and judge, but not…"

"But not Gryffindors," Remus offered, his voice sharp with something that the teen didn't know, but he thought that he might want to. "Because everything else is about Gryffindor?" The lion garnered a guess, knowing that he was right by the way that the younger pair nodded their heads slowly. A small, self deprecating chuckle escaped the older boy's lips before his face returned to something more impassive. "Can't say that I'm all that surprised," he muttered more to himself than the other two. "So are you planning on showing off this then?" Remus asked, gesturing to the spacers in the girl's hands, tapping them lightly.

"I would like to."

"Right then," the eldest of the three said, slinging his bag over his shoulder and grimacing internally at how ragged it looked when compared with that of the two purebloods before him. "Tell me how that goes for you then."

Remus didn't bother to look at the other two as he spoke, keeping his head down as she me burned itself deeply across the elder boy's face, but then he heard a familiar groan from one of the other two.

Pandora nodded in conformation, holding out her pale hand that was marred only by thin cuts from potion knives for the other to shake.

And if Remus smiled like an idiot for the first time in so long that the boy had long lost count of the days, then that was no one else's business. Even less so if the other two mirrored it to some extent alongside the lion.

—-

Remus listened to the soft sounds of the other three boys sleeping, the slow deep breaths filled the otherwise silent room. With a practiced carefulness, the teen slipped from his bed with his wand held lethally in his hand.

The halls were dark as the boy crept across them with the fearlessness of youth, not needing light as those without his condition did. Remus had to admit that it made sneaking around a lot easier for the teen, even if that was about the only pleasant thing about what he was. Because of this advantage of his, the lion was able to spot the crouching figures of the others with an ease that he wondered if anyone else would ever think to envy. He thought that they might.

"Evan. Barty," Remus whispered from just behind the other two boys, a silencing spell that he'd learned from James and Sirius's late night conversations already hanging thickly in the air as the two snakes shrieked.

"Merlin Remus," Barty whispered angrily as his voice was returned to him. "The hell was that for?"

"Don't act all high and mighty, as if you wouldn't have done the exact same to me if given the chance, Crouch," the Gryffindor pointed out not unkindly.

Barty looked ready to object, but a swift slap to the shoulder from Evan was enough to stop the wizard short.

"So what are we doing tonight?" Evan whispered quietly to the eldest boy. Neither of the other two could see the lion very well, but there was an air about the older boy that told the pair of a mischievous look in the other teen's eyes nonetheless.

"You'll just have to follow and see."

The three boys walked down the hall with the practiced silence of those who spent a great number of years not allowed to be heard. Remus led them to a hidden room on the seventh floor behind one of the tapestries, the stitched fairies on the fabric speaking angrily with the three as they were moved aside to let the trio in.

"Remus, what in Salazar's name is this?" Evan asked with the most unimpressed voice that either of the other boys had heard before.

Inside of the wand - lit room everything was barren, completely devoid of anything save for a slim coil of metal that sat in the middle of the floor and clanked pleasantly when Barty picked it up.

"Is this muggle?" The younger teen asked as he messed with the silver object, eyes going wide as he let go of one end while still holding the other and it came back towards the Slytherin like on the Screaming Yo-yos from Zonko's Joke Shop.

"It is," the eldest boy confirmed, taking the toy and putting it onto the palm of his hand, letting the purebloods watch as it seemed to walk away after falling from it. "It's called a Slinky."

" Brilliant ," Evan muttered, his voice thick with sarcasm. "The Muggle world's gift to wizarding kind. I still don't see why we couldn't have done this during the day."

"Aw, is someone losing out on their beauty sleep?" The Gryffindors cooed coldly as he stood once more. "Yeah, this thing is about as interesting as one of Professor Binns' classes right now," the eldest boy admitted with a non pulsed shrug. "But a couple thousand of these things and some good timing, well that wouldn't be dull at all."

In the dim light, Remus could see the other two boys sly grins mirroring his own, sharp as a blade.

—-

Friday came quickly, and with it came Friday night.

A now familiar sung in Remus's chest as he walked back to the Gryffindor common room after dinner. The other Marauders were already talking about what prank they wanted to plan first, each wanting to get a good one in this year - to be children before they fully took to the war following next year. Remus stayed as silent as he always was during these discussions, only telling the other boys when their ideas were plain idiotic, even by the standards of the Marauders.

"Remus."

Though only Remus was called, all four boys turned to look at the girls, James and Sirius passing furtive glances between one another at the sight of Dorcas Meadows and Pandora Lestrange done up prettily in clothes fit for a house party. The sixth year Slytherin [1] and fifth year Ravenclaw wasted no time in approaching the pack of Gryffindors.

"Meadows, Dora," Remus greeted, a small feeling of dread pooling in the Gryffindor's stomach at the idea of what those two could be striving to do together.

Dora looped her arm through Remus's, grinning at his unanswered questions as if she could read them on him like an open book. Sometimes the boy found himself wondering if the witch could do just that. Meadows took his other side, but didn't hold the boy so familiarly. 

Thank Merlin. 

The sight still drew quite the baffled looks from the other three Marauders.

"You ladies look nice today," James complimented as Meadows sent the boy a cool look that did nothing to measure up to how Sirius was currently glaring at the trio. If looks could kill, Remus thought that they'd be dead already if Black had any say in the matter. "What's the occasion?"

"Ravenclaw is having a party tonight," Meadows lied smoothly, doing her house proud in doing so.

Pandora nodded as her airy voice floated between them all. "We're here to help Remus get ready."

"A nerd party?" The eldest Black brother asked, a scoff in the boy's voice as he went ignored.

"I can dress myself," Remus protested weakly, but was met with a shushing noise from the Ravenclaw and an appraising look from the Slytherin girl.

"Not for a party you can't," Meadows decided before nodding to Pandora.

The blonde girl gave a loose tug and Remus followed easily, shrugging at the other three Gryffindor boys that were left to follow as the group made their way to the tower. The wolf only spared the trio a pitying glance as they were forced to stay downstairs as the girls had commandeered the boys' room. The majority of him actually found it quite amusing, seeing the self proclaimed kings of Hogwarts being ordered around.

Remus sat down on his bed as Dora and Meadows dug through his trunk, talking among themselves as if he wasn't there at all. The boy didn't mind, not when he knew that the pair were absorbed in a task for his sake.

"I think he should wear the muggle clothes he had on the train."

"On, I saw him in those, they'll work, but we'll need to do something about that sweater."

"A few too many holes to look entirely fashionable, still go though," Dora said kindly, a set smile on her lips as she seemed to remember that the owner of such clothes was still present. "What about a flannel?"

"The dark green one with black lines could work. Grab the boots, yeah."

A pile of clothes was dumped into the Gryffindor's arms as the boy was forced into the bathroom to change. Remus knew that he could easily shrug the both off if he wished - he was naturally stronger than almost anyone in the castle due to his condition- but he went along with it easily.

Remus changed quickly, not entirely trusting the girls not to snoop into the boy's things if curiosity became the better of the pair. And when he looked into the mirror, the Marauder didn't entirely hate who was looking back at him.

The flannel added a pop of color to the otherwise dark outfit, the shirt and jeans both black as could be. The scars on his face were visible even beneath the beauty charms that Lily, Marlene, and Mary had shown him in second year to hide them, but in muggle clothes Remus found that they looked like the trophy of a great feat rather than the effects of a curse he could never rid himself of. Something to show with pride rather than to hold in shame.

There was a soft knock on the door and Remus opened it, slipping out into the other room and shaking his head at the smirks of approval on the faces of the two girls.

"You clean up well, Lupin," Meadows said, a whistle soon falling from the Slytherin girl's lips as Dora nodded along.

"We had an idea, Rem," the younger girl said softly, stepping closer to the older boy as a wave of unease ran through the Marauder.

Remus trusted the Ravenclaw - truly he did - but they haven't known each other long enough to know what lines are okay to cross just yet.

"And what would that be?" He managed to ask.

Meadows came closer as well. "We want you to take off whatever concealment charms it is that you wear to dull your scars," the Slytherin girl said bluntly. "Even if only for tonight."

The request hit the Gryffindor boy like a stinging jinx, knocking all of the wind from the Marauder's lungs as worry and panic built up in the boy's chest. The persistent, ever lingering fear that anyone would look upon him and just know . 

They'll know anyway in just over a year , a voice inside of the wolf whispered and in a moment of reckless self destruction, Remus found himself agreeing.

"Fine."

Dora stood up in her tiptoes to ruffle the older boy's hair and Remus leaned into the touch.

—-

The Marauders watched as the two girls from earlier walked down the stairs to the boy's dorms with Moony quick in toe. A Remus that looked as muggle as he did on the train to school only a few days before.

A Remus who's scars stood out proudly against the tan of his skin.

The three boys glanced at one another in shock, knowing just how much shame the other boy always held for those very scars.

Sirius, sitting on the couch with an untrusted Mary quietly talking to Lily about the scene before them curled up on his side, wondered just how much someone could change before they became another person altogether.

—-

Remus grinned sharply at the now familiar sight of the Slytherin common room done up for a house party, amd took pleasure in knowing that it was a look cutting enough to keep those smart enough to remember the first time that the Gryffindor was here and keep their distance.

For now at the least.

"Rem! Dora!"

The older boy rolled his eyes almost affectionately at Barty's already tipsy call drawing Pandora and Remus closer, as Meadows peeled off to go join her own friends now that her job was done for the night.

Evan was sitting next to the boy, their shoulders pressed tightly together as a bottle was neatly nestled between the pair. The blond teen nodded in welcome as the lion and the eagle sat on either side of the bigger couch with the last snake between them.

"Interesting choice of clothing there, Lupin," the younger Black observed, his eyes slowly tracing across the older boy in a way that made Remus's skin burn dangerously.

"Dora and Meadows put it together," the Gryffindor explained, not tearing his eyes away from the other. "Do you like it?"

"It's very muggle," Regulus said slowly, his words measured neatly in a not answer.

"That's not an answer," the older boy pressed, his voice teasing in nature, something Remus never thought that he would be with one of his best mate's little brother.

When Regulus looked at the older boy sitting so closely to him that their knees knocked together, he thought that he might finally understand the beauty that all of the muggle poets seemed to endlessly find in destruction. And, Merlin , did he want to see more.

The older boy's scars were more prominent then than they ever had been before, even during the summer holiday. Every piercing looked like something out of a painting that he didn't know the name of just yet, but he knew that his mother would have it destroyed.

The thought made Regulus only stare more.

In the back of the boy's mind, the Slytherin wondered how much prodding it would take to have the other try black nail polish. He didn't think that it would be all that much if Pandora was involved as well.

Did he like it? That was the question right?

"Yes," the Slytherin boy said bluntly, his voice thick with something that he didn't know but the other did as the younger boy looked at the one beside him. To Regulus it almost looked as if the lion was finally beginning to give into something that he'd spent forever repressing.

Fuck yes.

And when Remus smiled, it was that primal - feral - thing that the younger boy had only seen once before.

It felt a bit like lightning.

—-

The party carried on the same as all of the other ones always tended to, with the boys - Slytherin or not - making absolute fools of themselves as the girls just barely acted any better. Remus would never not wonder why the lot of them decided to wait so long to hold duels as they did, but it was never not entertaining to watch drunk snakes fall over themselves as they failed miserably to curse one another.

Pressed nicely against Regulus and Firewhiskey pleasantly warming his veins, Remus hadn't expected to get his knuckles bloodied that night, but Mulciber had other plans for the night.

The wolf could smell the foul scented teen long before he drew close to them. The only consultation seemed to be that Snape, who had seemed to linger around the taller boy like a permanent shadow, was nowhere in sight for once.

"You're inviting all of the trash to the party, Baby Black?" The towering teen asked with a nasty grin to match his less than pleasant personality. The boy's words were directed to Regulus, but his sneer was given to Pandora; a fact that made the wolf want to growl. "You've even got Gryffindor's Loony Lupin here."

And just like that, the Gryffindor was on his feet with a look in his eyes so dark, so hungry , that anyone who saw it would know that there was a predator before them.

Smoke blew slowly from the wolf's lips as a new cigarette burned between the lion's fingers. "Duel, right now," the boy demanded as the odd group of friends leaned forwards with sudden interest. "Unless you're scared to lose to Loony Lupin ," the teen taunted in true Gryffindor fashion, putting the same emphasis on the name as the other boy had.

"Deal, Mudblood ," the other teen spat.

Remus didn't suppress his growl this time.

The sixth years moved quickly into the dueling lane as the rest of Slytherin house drew in close to watch, almost all of them remembering the show that they'd been given the last time that the lion had fought. Off to the side, Remus could see Dora looking disapprovingly at the sight - never one to have liked violence much -  but the three Slytherin boys had varying looks of interest; Regulus looking at him with a raised brow as if asking what the lion planned to do now.

Fight .

"Wands at the ready!" One of the seventh year Slytherin prefects yelled from the right of the pair. "And… duel !"

The metallic scent of magic swelled deeply in the air, taking on a bitter twinge to it as spells fired from both the boy's wands in an endless succession that didn't fully require words as emotions field it all.

The wood snarled inside of the boy as animalistic instinct took over the teen, guiding the lion's movements, pushing the teen closer and closer to the other. His spells growing stronger and stronger until the Expelliarmus went straight through the other's Protego , the Slytherin's wand flying across the room with enough force that the Gryffindor heard it hit the far wall.

But Remus didn't stop there.

Fuming with a feral rage, the wolf jumped at the heavier boy, bringing them both to the ground as the lion beat the snake long after his knuckles began to bleed, only stopping once a cool hand pulled him back.

The Gryffindor let Regulus pull him into what looked to be a stairwell that led to the Slytherin dorms similar to the Gryffindor ones, not stopping until the pair were halfway up the flight.

"Did I take it too far?" The older boy asked as he watched the blood slowly spill down his hands, dripping to the ground. The wolf's heart was still beating fast, adrenaline begging the lion to fight more. Remus felt a bit like a monster, but he didn't know if that was entirely a bad thing anymore.

Remus knew that any of the Gryffindors back in the Tower would say yes in a heartbeat after seeing the mess that the teen had made of the other boy, but Regulus wasn't like any of them and Remus didn't want him to be.

The younger boy shook his head no as the snake loosely held the others hands within his own, the younger boy's cool skin soothing against the dull ache cascading in the older boy's hands.

"Not at all," Regulus whispered the words as if they were something sacred. "You protected your own."

Gray eyes met brown and once more Remus found himself wondering what it would be like to just light the match.

How it would feel to burn.

—-

The Marauders slowly dragged themselves to breakfast the next morning, Remus being the first to rise even as he was the last to go to sleep the night before.  The moon was drawing nearer and the teen could already feel its effects even days away.

"Looks like someone did Mulciber in real well last night," Sirius remarked with a happy tone to the teen's voice as he pointed at the black and blue snake walking to the Slytherin table.

Remus felt the edges of his lips quirk up into a smirk at the sight, one that only deepened as the boy met the eyes of about four snakes across the Great Hall whose faces mirrored his own.

"Looks like it doesn't it?"

"Remus," a somewhat airy voice called from the boy's Sadie as its owner drew closer to the four, taking the open seat on the boy's other side - Peter was on the left.

"Dora," the Gryffindor greeted quietly, knowing that the Ravenclaw girl would have a much worse hangover than his own.

The witch wasn't having any of it.

"Hands," she firmly commanded while removing a vile of something clear from one of her pockets as the other Marauders watched shamelessly, Sirius glaring for a reason that Remus didn't know.

" Dora -"

" Remus ."

Remus pulled his hands out from lap and placed them a top of the table.

Using one of the clean cloths at table, the Ravenclaw girl poured some of the clear liquid upon it before applying it to the angry wounds on the scarred boy's knuckles.

"Muggle rubbing alcohol?" The boy asked as he recognized the scent immediately from almost every night after the full moon before coming to Hogwarts.

Pandora only shrugged in response as she applied more. "One of my dorm mates is a muggleborn," she explained. "I figured that you wouldn't want Madam Pomfrey to see this, so this will have to do."

Remus nodded, knowing that the younger was right. Madam Pomfrey would ask far too many questions when it looked like a fight was involved instead of just magic.

Peter looked wildly between the teen next to him and the one across the hall as Lestrange wrapped Moony's knuckles in long bandages. " You're the one that did that to Mulciber," the rat realized aloud, a thick sound of amazement coloring the boy's voice.

Sirius and James looked at Wormy as if the boy had finally gone mad, but then the information settled in their minds as well.

"He had it coming," Remus growled in a way that the other three boys had never heard him do so before.

Dora swatted at the older boy's shoulder.

"Next time just hex the bastard unconscious and be done with it, Rem," the girl said softly as she stood, giving the boy's shoulder a small squeeze as she left to Remus's quiet thank you.

James and Peter looked as if they wanted to ask more about the fight, but Sirius spoke first.

"The Lestrange girl your girlfriend now, Moony?" Sirius asked in a voice that was supposed to sound jesting, but had a curious edge to it that could almost be misconstrued as jealousy by another.

But Remus only laughed, an earnest thing that shook the thin teen's frame like a leaf in the wind.

" No ," the boy breathed. "Merlin no, Dora isn't exactly my type, Pads."

And Sirius was so placated and the other two so completely bewildered that the other three missed how Remus's eyes flickered across the Great Hall to catch that of another's.


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